JOURNAL From Oct. 14, 1735, to Feb. 1, 1738.

TUESDAY, Oct. 14, 1735, Mr. Benjamin Ingham, of Queen's-College, Oxford, Mr. Charles Delamotte, son of a merchant in London, who had offered himself some days before, my brother Charles Wesley, and myself, took boat for Gravesend, in order to embark for Georgia. Our end in leaving our native country, was not to avoid want (God having given us plenty of temporal blessings) nor to gain the dung or dross of riches or honour: but singly this, to save our souls: to live wholly to the glory of God. In the afternoon we found the Simmonds off Graves­end, and immediately went on board.

Wednesday and Thursday we spent with one or two of our friends, partly on board and partly on shore, in exhorting one another to shake off every weight, and to run with patience the race set before us.

Friday 17. I began to learn German, in order to converse with the Germans, six and twenty of whom we had on board. On Sunday, the weather being fair and calm, we had the morning-service on quarter­deck. I now first preached ex tempore, and then ad­ministered the Lord's supper to six or seven communi­cants. A little flock. May God increase it!

Monday 20. Believing the denying ourselves even in the smallest instances, might, by the blessing of [Page 24]God, be helpful to us, we wholly left off the use of flesh and wine, and confined ourselves to vegetable food, chiefly rice and biscuit. In the afternoon David Nitchman, bishop of the Germans, and two others began to learn English. O may we be, not only of one tongue, but of one mind and of one heart!

Tues. 21. We failed from Gravesend. When we were past about half the Goodwin Sands, the wind suddenly failed. Had the calm continued till ebb, the ship had probably been lost. But the gale sprung up again in an hour, and carried us into the Downs.

We now began to be a little regular. Our com­mon way of living was this. From four in the morn­ing till five, each of us used private prayer. From five to seven we read the bible together, carefully comparing it (that we might not lean to our own un­derstandings) with the writings of the earliest ages. At seven we breakfasted. At eight were the public prayers. From nine to twelve I usually learned Ger­man, and Mr. Delamotte, Greek. My brother writ sermons, and Mr. Ingham instructed the children. At twelve we met to give an account to one another what we had done since our last meeting, and what we designed to do before our next. About one we dined. The time from dinner to four, we spent in reading to those of whom each of us had taken in charge, or in speaking to them severally, as need re­quired. At four were the evening prayers; when either the second lesson was explained (as it always was in the morning) or the children were catechised, and instructed before the congregation. From five to six we again used private prayer. From six to seven I read in our cabin to two or three of the passengers (of whom there were about eighty English on board) and each of my brethren to a few more in theirs. At seven I joined with the Germans in their public service; while Mr. Ingham was reading between the decks, to [Page 25]as many as desired to hear. At eight we met again, to exhort and instruct one another. Between nine and ten we went to bed, where neither the roaring of the sea, nor the the motion of the ship, could take away the refreshing sleep which God gave us.

Friday 24. Having a rolling sea, most of the pas­sengers found the effects of it. Mr. Delamotte was exceeding sick, for several days: Mr. Ingham for about half an hour. My brother's head ached much. Hitherto it has pleased God, the sea has not disorder­ed me at all; nor have I been hindered one quarter of an hour from reading, writing, composing, or doing any business I could have done on shore.

During our stay in the Downs, some or other of us went, as often as we had opportunity, on board the ship that failed in company with us, where also many were glad to join in prayer and hearing the word.

Friday 31. We failed out of the Downs. At eleven at night I was waked by a great noise. I soon found there was no danger. But the bare apprehension of it, gave me a lively conviction what manner of men those ought to be, who are every moment on the bri [...]k of eternity.

Sat. Nov. 1. We came to St. Helen's harbour, and the next day into Cowes road. The wind was fair, but we waited for the man of war, which was to fail with us. This was a happy opportunity of instructing our fellow-travellers. May he whose feed we sow, give it the increase!

Sund. 16. Thomas Hird, and Grace his wife, with their children, Mark, aged 21, and Phebe, about 17, late quakers, were, at their often-repeated desire, and after careful instruction, admitted to bap­tism.

Thur. 20. We fell down into Yarmouth road, but the next day were forced back into Cowes. During our stay here there were several storms: in one of which two ships in Yarmouth road were lost.

[Page 26] The continuance of the contrary winds gave my brother an opportunity of complying with the desire of the minister of Cowes, and preaching there three or four times. The poor people flocked together in great numbers. We distributed a few little books among the serious of them, which they received with all possible expressions of thankfulness.

Fri. 21. One recovering from a dangerous illness, desired to be instructed in the nature of the Lord's supper. I thought it concerned her to be first in­structed in the nature of Christianity: and accordingly fixed an hour a day to read with her in Mr. Law's Treatise on Christian Perfection.

Sund. 23. At night I was waked by the tossing of the ship and roaring of the wind, and plainly shewed I was unfit, for I was unwilling to die.

Tues. Dec. 2. I had much satisfaction in convers­ing with one that was very ill and very serious. But in a few days she recovered from her sickness and from her seriousness together.

Sund. 7. Finding nature did not require so frequent supplies as we had been accustomed to, we agreed to le [...] off suppers; from doing which we have hitherto found [...]o inconvenience.

Wednes. 10. We failed from Cowes, and in the afternoon [...] the Needles. Here the ragged rocks, with the waves dashing and foaming at the foot of them, and the white side of the island rising to such a height, perpendicular from the beach, gave a strong idea of him that spauneth the heavens, and holdeth the waters in the hollow of his hand!

To day I spoke closely on the head of religion, to one I had talked with once or twice before. After­wards she said, with many tears, "My mother died when I was but ten years old. Some of her last words were, "Child, fear God; and though y [...] lose me, [Page 27]you shall never want a friend." I have now found a friend, when I most wanted, and le [...] [...]pected one."

From this day to the 14th, being in the Bay of Biscay, the sea was very rough. Mr. Delamotte and many others were mo [...] sick than ever: Mr. Ing­ham a little; I not at all. But the 14th being a calm day, most of the sick were cured at once.

Thurs. 18. One who was big with child, in a high fever, and almost wasted away with a violent cough, desired to receive the holy communion before fire died. At the hour of her receiving, she began to recover, and in a few days was entirely out of danger.

Sund. 21. We had fifteen communicants, which was our usual number on Sundays: on Christmas-day we had nineteen; but on New-year's-day fifteen only.

Thurs. Jan. 15, 1736. Complaint being made to Mr. Oglethorpe, of the unequal distribution of the water among the passengers, he appointed new officers to take charge of it. At this the old ones and their friends were highly exasperated against us, to w [...] they imputed the change. But the fierceness of ma [...] turn to thy praise.

Sat. 17. Many people were very impati [...] [...] contrary wind. At seven in the evening [...] were quieted by a storm. It rose higher [...]her till nine. About nine the sea broke over us from stem to stern; burst through the windows of the state cabin, where three or four of us were, and covered us all over, though a bureau sheltered me from the main shock. About eleven I lay down in the great cabin [...] and [...]n a short time fell asleep, though very uncertain whether I should wake alive, and much ashamed of my unwil­lingness to die. O how pure in heart must he be, who would rejoice to appear before God at a moment's warning! Toward morning, he rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm.

[Page 28] Sund. 18. We returned God thanks for our deli­verance, of which a few appeared duly sensible. But the rest (among whom were most of the sailors) denied we had been in any danger. I could not have believed that so little good would have been done by the terror they were in before. But it cannot be that they should long obey God from fear, who are deaf to the motives of love.

Fri. 25. In the evening another storm began. In the morning it increased, so that they were forced to let the ship drive. I could not but say to myself, How is it that thou hast no faith? Being still unwilling to die. About one in the afternoon, almost as soon as I had stept out of the great cabin door, the sea did not break as usual, but came with a full, smooth tide over the side of the ship. I was vaulted over with water in a moment, and so stunned, that I scarce expected to lift up my head again, till the sea should give up her dead. But, thanks be to God, I received no hurt at all. About midnight the storm ceased.

Sund. 25. At noon, our third storm began. At [...] was more violent than before. Now indeed we [...] say, the waves of the sea were mighty and raged hor­ [...] they rose up to the heavens above, and cleave down to he [...] [...]. The winds roared round about us, and (what [...] heard before) whistled as distinctly as if it had been a [...] voice. The ship not only rocked to and fro with the utmost violence, but shook and jarred with so unequal, grating a motion, that one could not but with great difficulty keep one's hold of any thing, nor stand a moment without it. Every ten minutes came a shock against the stern or side of the ship, which one would think should dash the planks in pieces. At this time, a child, privately baptised before, was brought to be received into the church. It put me in mind of Jeremiah's buying the field, when the Chaldeans were on the point of destroying [Page 29]Jerusalem, and seemed a pledge of the mercy God designed to shew us, even in the land of the living.

We spent two or three hours after prayers, in con­versing suitably to the occasion, confirming one ano­ther in a calm submission, to the wise, holy, gracious will of God. And now a storm did not appear so terrible as before. Blessed be the God of all conso­lation!

At seven I went to the Germans. I had long be­fore observed, the great seriousness of their behaviour. Of their humility they had given a continual proof, by performing those servile offices for the other passengers, which none of the English would undertake, for which they desired, and would receive no pay, saying, "It was good for their proud hearts," and "Their loving Savi­our had done more for them." And every day had given them occasion of shewing a meekness, which no injury could move. If they were pushed, struck, or thrown down, they rose again and went away; but no com­plaint was found in their mouth. There was now an opportunity of trying, whether they were deliv [...] from the spirit of fear, as well as from that off [...] anger and revenge. In the midst of the psal [...] [...] with their service began, the sea broke over [...] main-sail in pieces, covered the ship, and [...] be­tween the decks, as if the gr [...] [...] already swallowed us up. A terrible f [...] began among the English; The Germans calmly sung on. I asked one of them afterwards, "Was you not afraid?" He answered, "I thank God, No." I asked, "But were not your women and children afraid?" He re­plied mildly, "No; our women and children are not afraid to die."

From them I went to their crying, trembling neigh­bours, and pointed out to them the difference in the hour of trial, between him that feareth God, and him [Page 30]that feareth him not. At twelve the wind fell. This was the most glorious day which I have hitherto seen.

Mond. 26. We enjoyed the calm. I can conceive no difference, comparable to that between a smooth and a rough sea, except that which is between a mind calmed by the love of God, and one torn up by the storms of earthly passions.

Thurs. Jan. 29. About seven in the evening, we fell in with the skirts of a hurricane. The rain as well as the wind was extremely violent. The sky was so dark in a moment, that the sailors could not so much as see the ropes, or set about furling the sails. The ship must in all probability have overset, had not the wind fell as suddenly as it rose. Toward the end of it, we had that appearance on each of the masts, which (it is thought) the ancients called Castor and Pollux. It was a small ball of white fire, like a star. The mariners say, it appears either in a storm (and then commonly upon the deck) or just at the end of it: and then it is usually on the masts or sails.

Frid. 30. We had another storm, which did us no [...] harm, than splitting the fore-sail. Our bed [...] [...]et, I laid me down on the floor, and slept found [...]ll morning. And I believe, I shall not find it nee [...] [...] go to bed (as it is called) any more.

Sund. [...] spoke with a ship of Carolina; and Wedn. 4. [...] within soundings. About noon the trees were visible from the mast, and in the after­noon from the main deck. In the evening lesson were these words, A great door and effectual is opened. O let no one shut it!

Thurs. Feb. 5. Between two and three in the after­noon, God brought us all safe into the Savannah river. We cast anchor near Tybee-island, where the groves of pines, running along the shore, made an agreeable prospect, shewing as it were, the bloom of spring, in the depth of winter.

[Page 31] Frid. 6. About eight in the morning, we first set foot on American ground. It was a small uninhabited island, over against Tybee. Mr. Oglethorpe led us to a rising ground, where we all kneeled down to give thanks. He then took boat for Savannah. When the rest of the people were come on shore, we called our little flock together to prayers. Several parts of the second lesson, Mark. vi. were wonderfully suited to the occasion; in particular, the account of the courage and sufferings of John the baptist; our Lord's directions to the first preachers of his gospel and their toiling at sea, and deliverance with those comfortable words, It is I, be not afraid.

Sat. Feb. 7, M [...]. Oglethorpe returned from Savan­nah, with Mr. Spangenberg, one of the pastors of the Germans. I soon found what spirit he was of; and asked his advice with regard to my own conduct. He said, ‘My brother, I must first ask you one or two questions. Have you the witness within your­self? Does the Spirit of God bear witness with your spirit, that you are a child of God?’ I was fur­prized, and [...]ew not what to answer. He observed it, and asked, "Do you know Jesus Christ?" I paused and said, "I know he is the Saviour of the world." ‘True; replied he; but do [...] know he has saved you?’ I answered " [...] [...]ope he has died to save me." He only ad [...] "Do you know yourself?" I said, "I do." But I fear, they were vain words.

Mond. 9. I asked him many questions, both con­cerning himself, and the church at Hernhuth. The substance of his answers was this.

"At eighteen years old I was sent to the univer­sity of Jena, where I spent some years in learning languages, and the vain philosophy, which I have now long been labouring to forget. Here it pleased God by some that preached his word with power, to over­turn [Page 32] [...]urn my heart. I immediately threw aside all my learning, but what tended to save my soul. I shun­ned all company, and retired into a solitary place, re­solving to spend my life there. For three days I had much comfort here; but on the fourth it was all gone. I was amazed, and went for advice to an experienced Christian. When I came to him, I could not speak. But he saw my heart, and advised me to go back to my house, and follow the business providence called me to. I went back, but was fit for nothing. I could neither do business, nor join in any conversation. All I could say to any one, was Yes, or No. Many times I could not say that, nor understand the plainest thing that was said to me. My friends and acquaintance looked upon me as dead, came no more to me, nor spoke about me.

"When I grew better, I began teaching some poor children. Others joining with me, we taught more and more, till there were above thirty teachers and above two hundred scholars. I had now invitations to other universities. But I could not accept of any: desiring only, if it were the will of God, to be little and unknown. I had spent some years thus, when professor Breithaupt of Halle died: being then pressed to remove thither, I believed it was the call of God, and went. I had not been long there, before many faults were found, both with my behaviour and preach­ing: and offences increased more and more, till after half a year, a petition against me was sent to the king of Prussia, who sent an order to the commander at Halle, in pursuance whereof I was warned to leave the city in forty-eight hours. I did so, and retired to Hernhuth, to Count Zinzendorf.

"The village of Hernhuth contains about a thou­sand souls, gathered out of many nations. They hold [...] the discipline, as well as the faith and practice of the apostolical church. I was desired by the brethren [Page 33]there last year, to conduct sixteen of them to Georgia, where two lots of ground are assigned us, and with them I have stayed ever since."

I asked, "Whither he was to go next?" He said, "I have thoughts of going to Pennsylvania. But what God will do with me, I know not. I am blind. I am a child. My father knows, and I am ready to go wherever he calls."

Frid. 13. Some of the Indians sent us word of their intention to come down to us. In our course of reading to day, were these words; Thus saith the Lord of hosts, It shall yet come to pass that there shall come people, and the inhabitants of many cities. And the inha­bitants of one city shall go to another, saying, Let us go speedily to pray before the Lord, and to seek the Lord of hosts: I will go also. Yea many people and strong nations, shall come to seek the Lord of hosts, and to pray before him. Zech. xiii. 20, &c.

Sat. Feb. 14. About one, Tomo-Chachi, his ne­phew Thleeanouhee, his wife Sinauky, with two more women and two or three Indian children, came on board. As soon as we came in, they all rose, and shook us by the hand, and Tomo-Chachi (one Mrs. Musgrove intepreted) spoke as follows.

"I am glad you are come. When I was in Eng­land I desired that some would speak the great word to me. And my nation then desired to hear it. But now we are all in confusion. Yet I am glad you are come. I will go up and speak to the wise men of our nation. And I hope they will hear. But we would not be made Christians, as the Spaniards make Chris­tians. We would be taught, before we are baptiz­ed."

I answered, "There is but one, he that sitteth in heaven, who is able to teach man wisdom. Tho' we are come so far, we know not whether he will please to teach you by us or no If He teaches you, you will [Page 34]learn wisdom; but we can do nothing." We then withdrew.

Sund. 15. Another party of Indians came. They were all tall, well-proportioned men, and had a re­markable softness in their speech, and gentleness in their whole behaviour. In the afternoon they all re­turned home, but three, who stayed to go with Mr. Oglethorpe.

Monday, Feb. 16. Mr. Oglethorpe set out for [...] new settlement on the Alatamahaw river. He took with him 50 men; besides Mr. Ingham, Mr. Hermsdorf and the three Indians.

Thurs, 19. My brother and I took boat, and passing by Savannah, went to pay our first visit in A­merica, to the poor [...]. But neither Tomo Chachi [...]nor Sinauky were as home. Coming back, we waited upon Mr. Causton, the chief magistrate of Savannah. From him we went with Mr. Spangen­berg to the German brethren. About eleven we re­turned to the boat, and came to our ship about four in the morning.

Sat. 21. Mary Welch, aged eleven days, was baptized according to the custom of the first church, and the rule of the church of England. The child was ill then, but recovered from that hour.

Tu. 24. Mr. Oglethorpe returned. The day fol­lowing I took my leave of most of the passengers of the ship; who all appeared serious. I may be, a [...] the seed is not fallen upon stony ground.

In the evening I went to Savannah again, whence Mr. Spangenberg, bishop Nitscman and Andrew Do­ber, went up with us to Mrs. Musgrove's, to chuse a spot for the little house which Mr. Oglethorpe had promised to build us. Being afterward disappointed of our boat, we were obliged to pass the night there. [Page 35]But wherever we are, it is the same thing, if it be the will of our Father which is in heaven.

At our return the next day (Mr. Quincy being then in the house wherein we afterwards were) Mr. Delamotte and I took up our lodging with the Ger­mans. We had now an opportunity day by day, of observing their whole behaviour. For we were in one room with them from morning to night, unless for the little time I spent in walking. They were always employed, always chearful themselves, and in good humour with one another. They had put away all anger and strife, and wrath and bitterness and clamour, and evil-speaking. They walked worthy of the voca­tion wherewith they were called, and adorned the gos­pel of our Lord in all things.

Sat. Feb. 28. They met to consult concerning the affairs of their church: Mr. Spangenberg being [...] to go to Pennsylvania, and bishop Nitschman to return to Germany. After several hours spent in conference and prayer, they proceeded to the election and ordination of a bishop. The great simplicity as well as [...]emnity of the whole, almost made me for­get the seventeen hundred years between, and imagine myself in one of those affemblies, where form and state were not: but Paul the tent-maker or Peter the fi [...] ­erman prefided; yet with the demonstration of the spi­rit and of power.

Sund. 29. Hearing Mr. Oglethorpe did not come any more to Savannah, before he went to Frederica, I was obliged to go down to the ship again (Mr Spangenberg followed me thither) and receive his or­ders and instructions on several heads. From him we went to public prayers: after which we were refreshed by several letters from England. Upon which I could not but observe how careful our Lord is, to re­pay whatever we give up on his account. When I left England, I was chiefly afraid of two things; one, [Page 36]that I should never again have so many faithful friends as I left there; the other, that the spark of love which began to kindle in their hearts, would cool and die a­way. But who knoweth the mercy and power of God? From ten friends I am a while secluded: and he hath opened me a door into a whole church. And as to the very persons I left behind, his spirit is gone forth so much the more, teaching them not to trust in man, but in him that raised the dead, and calleth the things that are not, as though they [...]

About four, having taken leave of Mr. Spangen­berg, who was the next morning to set out for Penn­sylvania, I returned to Savannah. Sat. March 6. I had a long conversation with John Reinier, the son of a gentleman, who being driven out of France, on ac­count of his religion, settled at Vivay in Swisserland, and practised physic there. His father died while he was a child. Some years after he told his mother, he was desirous to leave Swisserland, and to retire into some other country, where he might be free from the temptations which he could not avoid there. When her consent was at length obtained, he agreed with a master of a vessel, with whom he went to Holland by land; thence to England, and from England to Penn­sylvania. He was provided with money, books and drugs, intending to follow his father's profession. But no sooner was he come to Philadelphia, than the cap­tain who had borrowed his money before, instead of repaying it, demanded the full pay for his passage, and under that pretence seized on all his effects. He then left him in a strange country, where he could not speak to be understood, without necessaries, money or friends. In this condition he thought it best to sell himself for a servant, which he accordingly did, for seven years. When about five were expired, he fell sick of a lingering illness, which made him useless to his master; who after it had continued half a year, [Page 37]would not keep him any longer, but turned him out to shift for himself. He first tried to mend shoes, but soon after joined himself to some French pro­testants, and learned to make buttons. He then went and lived with an anabaptist: but soon after hearing an account of the Germans in Georgia, walked from Pennsylvania thither, where he found the rest, which he had so long sought in vain.

Sund. March 7. I entered upon my ministry at Savannah, by preaching on the epistle for the day, being the 13th of the first Corinthians. In the se­cond lesson, Luke xviii. was our Lord's prediction of the treatment which he himself (and consequently his followers) was to meet with from the world; and his gracious promise to those who are content, Nudi nudum Christum sequi: Verily I say unto you, there is no man that hath left house, or friends, or brethren, or wife, or children for the kingdom of God's sake, which shall not receive manifold more in this present time, and in the world to come everlasting life.

Yet notwithstanding these plain declarations of our Lord, notwithstanding my own repeated experience, notwithstanding the experience of all the sincere fol­lowers of Christ, whom I have ever talked with, read or heard of: nay, and the reason of the thing, evinc­ing to a demonstration, that all who love not the light must hate him, who is continually labouring to pour it in upon them: I do here bear witness against my­self, that when I saw the number of people crowding into the church, the deep attention with which they received the word, and the seriousness that afterwards sat on all their faces; I could scarce refrain from giving the lie to experience and reason and scripture all together. I could hardly believe that the greater, the far greater part of this attentive, serious people, would hereafter trample under foot that word, and say all manner of evil falsely of him that spake it. O [Page 38]who can believe, what their heart abhors? Jesus, Master, have mercy on us! Let us love thy cross; then shall we believe, If we suffer with thee, we shall also reign with [...]hee!

This evening one of the Germans, who had been long ill of a consumption, found himself much worse. On my mentioning it to bishop Nitschman he smiled and said, "He will soon be well; he is ready for the bridegroom."

Sund. Mar. 14, Having before given notice of my design to do so, every Sunday and holiday, ac­cording to the rules of our church, I administered the holy communion to eighteen persons. Which of these will endure to the end?

Mond. Mar. 15. Mr. Quincy going for Carolina, I removed into the minister's house. It is large enough for a larger family than ours and has many convenien­cies, besides a good garden. I could not but reflect on the well known epigram,

Sund. 28. A servant of Mr. Bradley's sent to de­sire to speak with me. Going to him, I found a young man ill, but perfectly sensible. He desired the rest to go out, and then said, "On Thursday night, about eleven, being in bed, but broad awake, I heard one calling aloud "Peter! Peter Wright!" And looking up, the room was as light as day, and I saw a man in very bright cloaths stand by the bed, who said, "Prepare yourself; for your end is nigh;" and then immediately all was dark as before." I told him, "The advice was good, whencesoever it came." In a few days he recovered from his illness; his whole [Page 39]temper was changed as well as his life; and so con­tinued to be, till after three or four weeks he relapsed and died in peace.

T [...]s. Mar. 30. Mr. Ingham coming from Fre­derica, brought me letters, pressing me to go thither. The next day Mr. Delamotte and I began to try, whether life might not as well be sustained, by one sort as by a variety of food. We chose to make the experiment with bread; and were never more vigorous and healthy than while we tasted nothing else. Bles­sed are the pure in heart! Who whether they eat or drink, or whatever they do, have no end therein but to please God! To them all things are pure. Every creature is good to them, and nothing to be rejected. But let them who know and feel, that they are not thus pure, use every help and remove every hindrance: always remembering, He that despiseth little things, shall fall by little and little.

Sund. Apr. 4. About four in the afternoon, I set out for Frederica, in a Pettiawga (a sort of flat-bottomed barge.) The next evening we anchored near Skidoway island, where the water at flood was twelve or fourteen feet deep. I wrapt myself up from head to foot, in a large cloak, to keep off the sand-flies, and lay down on the quarter-deck. Between one and two I waked under water, being so fast asleep that I did not find where I was till my mouth was full of it. Having left my cloak, I know not how upon deck, I swam round to the other side of the Pettiawga, where a boat was tied, and climbed up by the rope, without any hurt, more than wetting my cloaths. Thou art the God of whom cometh salva­tion: thou art the Lord by whom we escape death.

The winds were so contrary, that on Sat. 10. we could but just get over-against Doboy island, twenty miles from Frederica, but could not possibly make the creek, having a strong tide also against us. Here we [Page 40]lay beating off till past one; when the lightning and rain which we had long seen at a distance, drove down full upon us; till after a quarter of an hour, the clouds parted, some passing on the right, and some on the left, leaving us a clear sky, and so strong a wind right after us, as in two hours brought us to Frederica.

A little before we landed, I opened my Testament on these words, If God be for us, who can be against us? Coming on shore, I found my brother exceeding weak, having been for some time ill of a flux. But he mended from the hour he saw me. This also hath God wrought!

Sund. April 11. I preached at the new Store­house on the first verse of the gospel for the day, Which of you convinceth me of sin? And if I say the truth, why do ye not believe me? There was a large congregation, whom I endeavoured to convince of unbelief, by simply proposing the conditions of salva­tion, as they are laid down in scripture, and appealing to their own hearts, whether they believed they could be saved on no other terms?

In every one of the six following days, I had some fresh proofs of the absolute necessity of following that wise advice of the apostle, Judge nothing before the time; until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts.

Sat. April 17. We set out for Savannah, and reached it on Tuesday evening. O blessed place, where having but one end in view, dissembling and fraud are not: but each of us can pour out his heart without fear into his brother's bosom!

Not finding as yet any door open, for the pursuing our main design, we considered, in what manner we might be most useful to the little flock at Savannah. And we agreed, 1st. To adv [...]se the more serious [Page 41]among them, to form themselves into a sort of little society, and to meet once or twice a week, in order to reprove, instruct and exhort one another. 2. To select out of these a smaller number for a more inti­mate union with each other, which might be forward­ed, partly by our conversing singly with each, and partly by inviting them altogether to our house; and this accordingly we determined to do every Sunday in the afternoon.

Wed. May 5. I was asked to baptize a child of Mr. Parker's, second bailiff of Savannah. But Mrs. Parker told me, "Neither Mr. P. nor I will con­sent to its being dipped." I answered, "If you certify that your child is weak, it will suffice (the ru­brick says) to pour water upon it." She replied, "Nay the child is not weak; but I am resolved it shall not be dipped." This argument I could not confute. So I went home; and the child was baptized by another person.

Sund. 9. I began dividing the public prayers, according to the original appointment of the church (still observed in a few places in England.) The morning service began at five. The communion of­fice (with the sermon) at eleven. The evening ser­vice about three. And this day I began reading prayers in the Court-house; a large and convenient place.

Mond. 10. I began visiting my parishioners in or­der, from house to house; for which I set apart the time (when they can't work, because of the heat, viz.) from twelve till three in the afternoon.

Sund. May 16. We were surprized in the even­ing by my brother just come from Frederica. After some conversation, we consulted how the poor people there might be taken care of, during his absence. And it was at last agreed, that Mr. Ingham and I should take our turns in assisting them; and the first [Page 42]was allotted me. Accordingly on Tues. 18. I walk­ed to Thunderbolt; whence the next afternoon we set out in a small boat: in the evening we touched at Skidoway, and had a small, but attentive congrega­tion, to join with us in evening prayer.

Sat. May 22. About four in the afternoon we en­tered upon Doboy Sound. The wind, which was right a-head, was so high, when we were in the mid­dle of it, and the sea so rough, being driven in at the inlet, that the boat was on the point of sinking every moment. But it pleased God to bring us safe to the other side in half an hour, and to Frederica the next morning. We had public prayers at nine, at which nineteen persons were present; and (I think) nine communicants.

Fri. 28. I read the commendatory prayer by Mr. Germain, who lay at the point of death. He had lost his speech and his senses. His eyes were set, nei­ther had he any discernable motion, but the heaving of his breast. While we stood round him, he stretch­ed out his arms, rubbed his head, recovered his sight, speech and understanding; and immediately sending for the bailiffs, settled the affairs of his family; and then lay down and died.

At the first service on Sund. May 30. were only five, at the second twenty-five. The next day, I made Mr Lassel's will; who notwithstanding his great weakness, was quite revived, when any mention was made of death, or of eternity.

Tues. June 1. After praying with him, I was surprized to find one of the most controverted ques­tions in divinity, disinterested love, decided at once by a poor old man, without education or learning or any instructor, but the Spirit of God. I asked him, what he thought of paradise (to which he had said he was going?) He said, "To be sure, it is a fine [Page 43]place. But I don't mind that. I don't care what place I am in. Let God put me where he will, or do with me what he will, so I may but set forth his honour and glory."

Thurs. June 3. Being ascension-day, we had the holy communion; but only Mr. Hird's family joined with us in it. One reason why there were no more, was because a few words which a woman had inad­vertently spoken, had set almost all the town in a flame. Alas! How shall a city stand that is thus di­vided against itself? Where there is no brotherly love, no meekness, no for-bearing or forgiving one ano­ther: but envy, malice, revenge, suspicion, anger, clamour, bitterness, evil-speaking, without end! Abun­dant proof that there can be no true love of man, un­less it be built on the love of God.

Sun. 6. Calling on Mr. Lassel, and asking how he did, "My departure (said he) I hope is at hand." I asked, "Are you troubled at that?" He replied, "O no; to depart and to be with Christ, is far bet­ter. I desire no more of this bad world. My hope and my joy and my love is there." The next time I saw him he said, "I desire nothing more, than for God to forgive my many and great sins. I would be humble. I would be the humblest creature living. My heart is humble and broken for my sins. Tell me, teach me, what shall I do to please God. I would fain do whatever is his will." I said, "It is his will you should suffer." He answered, "Then I will suffer. I will gladly suffer whatever pleases him."

Mon. 7. Finding him weaker, I asked, "Do you still desire to die?" He said, "Yes; but I dare not pray for it, for fear I should displease my heaven­ly Father. His will be done. Let him work his will, in my life, or in my death."

Thurs. 10. We began to execute at Frederica what we had before agreed to do at Savannah. Our [Page 44]design was on Sundays in the afternoon, and every evening after public service, to spend some time with the most serious of the communicants, in singing, reading and conversation. This evening we had only Mark Hird. But on Sunday Mr. Hird, and two more desired to be admitted. After a psalm and a little conversation, I read Mr. Law's Christian Per­fection, and concluded with another psalm.

Sat. June 12. Being with one who was very de­sirous to converse with me, "but not upon religion," I spoke to this effect. "Suppose you was going to a country, where every one spoke Latin and under­stood no other language, neither would converse with any that did not understand it: suppose one was sent to stay here a short time, on purpose to teach it you: suppose that person, pleased with your company, should spend his time in trifling with you, and teach you no­thing of what he came for: would that be well done? Yet this is our case. You are going to a county, where every one speaks the love of God. The citi­zens of heaven understand no other language. They converse with none who do not understand it. In­deed none such are admitted there. I am sent from God to teach you this. A few days are allotted us for that purpose. Would it then be well done in me, because I was pleased with your company, to spend this short time in trifling, and teach you nothing of what I came for? God forbid! I will rather not con­verse with you at all. Of the two extremes, this is the best."

Wed. June 16. Another little company of us met, Mr. Reed, Davidson, Walker, Delamotte, and my­self. We sung, read a little of Mr. Law, and then conversed. Wednesdays and Fridays were the days we fixed for constant meeting.

Thurs. 17. An officer of a man of war, walking just behind us, with two or three of his acquaintance, [Page 45]cursed and swore exceedingly; but upon my reprov­ing him, seemed much moved, and gave me many thanks.

Sat. 19. Mr. Oglethorpe returned from the south, and gave orders on Sunday the 20th, that none should profane the day (as was usual before) by fishing or fowling upon it. In the afternoon I summed up what I had seen or heard at Frederica, inconsistent with christianity, and consequently with the prosperity of the place. The event was as it ought: some of the hearers were profited, and the rest deeply offended.

This day, at half an hour past ten, God heard the prayer of his servant, and Mr. Lassel, according to his desire, was dissolved that he might be with Christ.

Tues. 22. Observing much coldness in Mr.—'s behaviour, I asked him the reason of it. He an­swered, "I like nothing you do; all your sermons are satires upon particular persons. Therefore I will never hear you more. And all the people are of my mind. For we won't hear ourselves abused."

"Besides, they say, they are pr [...]testants. But as for you, they cannot tell what religion you are of. They never heard of such a religion before. They do not know what to make of it. And then, your private behaviour.—All the quarrels that have been here since you came, have been long of you. Indeed there is neither man nor woman in the town, who minds a word you say. And so you may preach long enough; but nobody will come to hear you."

He was too warm for hearing an answer. So I had nothing to do, but to thank him for his open­ness, and walk away.

Wednes. 23. I had a long conversation with Mr. —, upon the nature of true religion. I then asked him, "Why he did not endeavour to recom­mend it to all with whom he conversed?" He said, "I did so once; and for some time, I thought I [Page 46]had done much good by it. But I afterwards found they were never the better, and I myself was the worse. Therefore now, though I always strive to be inoffensive in my conversation, I do not strive to make people religious, unless those that have a desire to be so, and are consequently willing to hear me. But I have not yet (I speak not of you, or your brother) found one such person in America."

He that hath ears to hear, let him hear! Mark the tendency of this accursed principle! If you will speak only to those who are willing to hear, see how many you will turn from the error of their ways! If there­fore, striving to do good, you have done hurt, what then? So did St. Paul. So did the Lord of life. Even HIS word was the savour of death, as well as the savour of life. But shall he therefore strive no more? God forbid! Strive more humbly, more calm­ly, more c [...]tiously. Do not strive as you did before,— but strive, while the breath of God is in your noctril [...]!

Being to leave Frederica in the evening, I took the more notice of these words in the lesson for the day. Whereunto shall I liken the men of this generation? They are like unto children sitting in the market-place, and saying, [...] have piped unto you, and ye have not danced, we have mourned to you, and ye have not wept. For John the baptist came neither eating bread, nor drinking wine, and ye say, He hath a devil. The Son of Man is come eating and drinking, and ye say, Behold a glutton­ous man and a wine bibber, a friend of Publicans and Sinners. Luke vii.

About eleven at night we took boat. And on Sat. 26, about one in the afternoon came to Savannah. O what de we want here, either for life or godliness! If suffering, God will send it in his time.

Sun. June 27. About twenty joined with us in morning prayer. An hour or two after, a large party of Creek Indians came, the expectation of whom de­prived [Page 47]us of our place of public worship, in which they were to have their audience.

Wednes. 30. I hoped a door was opened, for going up immediately to the Choctaws, the least po­lished, i. e. the least corrupted of all the Indian na­tions. But upon my informing Mr. Oglethorpe of our design, he objected, not only the danger of being intercepted, or killed by the French there; but much more, the inexpediency of leaving Savannah destitute of a minister. These objections I related to our brethren in the evening, who were all of opinion, "We ought not to go yet."

Thurs. July 1. The Indians had an audience, and another on Saturday, when Chicali, their head-man, dined with Mr. Oglethorpe. After dinner, I asked the grey-headed old man, "What he thought he was made for?" He said, "He that is above knows what he made us for. We know nothing. We are in the dark. But white men know much. And yet white men build great houses, as if they were to live for ever. But white men cannot live for ever. In a little time, white men will be dust as well as I." I told him, "If red men will learn the good book, they may know as much as white men. But neither we nor you can understand that book, unless we are taught y him that is above: and he will not teach, unless you avoid, what you already know is not good." He answered, "I believe that. He will not teach us, while our hearts are not white. And our men do what they know is not good. They kill their own children. And our women do what they know is not good. They kill the child before it is born. There­fore, he that is above, does not send us the good book."

Hearing the younger of the Miss Boveys was not well, I called upon them this evening. I found she had only the prickly heat, a sort of rash, very com­mon [Page 48]here in summer. We soon fell into serious con­versation, after I had asked, "If they did not think they were too young to trouble themselves with re­ligion yet? And, whether they might not defer it ten or a dozen years?" To which one of them replied, "If it will be reasonable ten years hence, to be reli­gious, it is so now: I am not for deferring one mo­ment."

Wednes. July 7. I called there again, being de­termined now to speak more closely. But meeting company there, prudence induced me to put it off till another opportunity.

Thurs. 8. Mr. O. being there again, and casually speaking of sudden death, Miss Becky said, "If it was the will of God, I should choose to die without a lingering illness." Her sister said, "Are you then always prepared to die?" She replied, "Jesus Christ is always prepared to help me. And little stress is to be laid on such a preparation for death, as is made in a sit of sickness."

Sat. July 10. Just as they had done drinking tea, Mrs. Margaret seeing her colour change, asked, if she was well? She did not return any answer; and Dr. Tal [...]er soon after going by, she desired him to step in, and said, "Sir, my sister, I fear is not well." He looked earnestly at her, felt her pulse, and repli­ed, "Well, madam! Your sister is dying." However he thought it not impossible, bleeding might help. She bled about an ounce, leaned back and died.

As soon as I heard of it, I went to the house, and begged they would not lay her out immediately, there being a possibility, at least, she might only be in a swoon: of which indeed there was some slight hope, she not only being as warm as ever, but having a fresh colour in her cheeks, and a few drops of blood starting out, upon bending her arm: but there was no pulse and no breath; so that having waited some [Page 49]hours, we found her spirit was indeed returned to God who gave it.

I never saw so beautiful a corpse in my life. Poor comfort to its late inhabitant! I was greatly surprized at her sister. There was in all her behaviour, such an inexpressible mixture of tenderness and resignation. The first time I spoke to her, she said, "All my af­flictions are nothing to this. I have lost not only a sister, but a friend. But it is the will of God. I rely on him; and doubt not but he will support me under it."

This evening we had such a storm of thunder and lightning, as I never saw before even in Georgia. This voice of God too, told me I was not fit to die; since I was afraid, rather than desirous of it! O when shall I wish to be dissolved and to be with Christ! When I love him with all my heart.

Almost the whole town was the next evening at the funeral: where many doubtless made a world of good resolutions. O how little trace of most of these will be left in the morning! 'Tis a true saying, "Hell is paved with good intentions."

Tues. July 20. Five of the Chicasaw Indians (twenty of whom had been in Savannah several days) came to see us, with Mr. Andrews, their interpreter. They were all warriors; four of them head men. The two chiefs were Paustoobee and Mingo Mattaw. Our conference was as follows:

Q. Do you believe, there is one above who is over all things?

Paustoobee answered, We believe there are four beloved things above, the clouds, the sun, the clear sky, and he that lives in the clear sky.

Q. Do you believe, there is but one that lives in the clear sky?

A. We believe, there are two with him, three in all.

[Page 50] Q. Do you think he made the sun, and the other beloved things?

A. We cannot tell. Who hath seen?

Q. Do you think he made you?

A. We think he made all men at first.

Q. How did he make them at first?

A. Out of the ground.

Q. Do you believe he loves you?

A. I do not know. I cannot see him.

Q. But has he not often saved your life?

A. He has. Many bullets have gone on this side, and many on that side, but he would never let them hurt me. And many bullets have gone into these young men; and yet they are alive?

Q. Then, cannot he save you from your enemies now?

A. Yes, but we know not, if he will. We have now so many enemies round about us, that I think of nothing but death. And if I am to die, I shall die, and I will die like a man. But if he will have me to live I shall live. Though I had ever so many ene­mies, he can destroy them all.

Q. How do you know that?

A. From what I have seen. When our enemies came against us before, then the beloved clouds came for us. And often much rain, and sometimes hail has come upon them, and that in a very hot day. And I saw, when many French and Choctaws and other nations came against one of our towns. And the ground made a noise under them, and the beloved ones in the air behind them. And they were afraid, and went away, and left their meat and drink and their guns. I tell no lie. All these saw it too.

Q. Have you heard such noises at other times?

A. Yes, often: before and after almost every battle.

Q. What sort of noises were they?

A. Like the noise of drums and guns and shouting.

[Page 51] Q. Have you heard any such lately?

A. Yes: four days after our last battle with the French.

Q. Then you heard nothing before it?

A. The night before I dreamed, I heard many drums up there: and many trumpets there, and much stamping of feet and shouting. Till then I thought we should all die. But then I thought the beloved ones were come to help us. And the next day I heard above a hundred guns go off, before the fight began. And I said, "When the sun is there, the beloved ones will help us; and we shall conquer our enemies." And we did so.

Q. Do you often think and talk of the beloved ones?

A. We think of them always, wherever we are. We talk of them and to them, at home and abroad; in peace, in war, before and after we fight; and in­deed whenever and wherever we meet together.

Q. Where do you think your souls go after death?

A. We believe the souls of red men walk up and down near the place where they died, or where their bodies lie. For we have often heard cries and noise [...] near the place where any prisoners had been burnt.

Q. Where do the souls of white men go after death?

A. We cannot tell. We have not seen.

Q. Our belief is, that the souls of bad men only walk up and down; but the souls of good men go up.

A. I believe so too. But I told you the talk of the nation.

(Mr. Andrews. They said at the burying, "They knew what you was doing. You was speaking to the beloved ones above, to take up the soul of the young woman.")

[Page 52] Q. We have a book that tells us many things of the beloved ones above, would you be glad to know them?

A. We have no time now, but to fight. If we should ever be at peace, we should be glad to know?

Q. Do you expect ever to know what the white men know?

(Mr. Andrews. They told Mr O. They believe the time will come, when the red and white men will be one)

Q. What do the French teach you?

A. The French black ^* kings never go out. We see you go about. We like that. That is good.

Q. How came your nation by the knowledge they have?

A. As soon as ever the ground was sound, and fit to stand upon, it came to us, and has been with us ever since. But we are young men. Our old men know more. But all of them do not know. There are but a few; whom the beloved one chuses from a child, and is in them, and takes care of them, and teaches them. They know these things: and our old men practise: therefore they know. But I do not practise. Therefore I know little.

Mond. July 26. My brother and I set out for Charleston, in order to his embarking for England. But the wind being contrary, we did not reach Port. Royal, 40 miles from Savannah, till Wednesday evening. The next morning we left it. But the wind was so high in the afternoon, as we were crossing the neck of St. Helena's sound, that our oldest sailor cried out "Now every one must take care for himself." I told him, "God would take care for us all." Almost as soon as the words were spoken, the mast fell. I kept on the edge of the boat, to be clear of her when she sunk (which we expected every moment) though with little prospect of swimming ashore, against such a [Page 53]wind and sea. But, How is it that thou hadst no faith? The moment the mast fell, two men caught it and pulled it into the boat; the other three rowed with all their might, and God gave command to the wind and seas, so that in an hour we were safe on land.

Sat. July 31. We came to Charleston. The church is of brick, but plaistered over like stone. I believe it would contain three or four thousand per­sons. About three hundred were present at the morn­ing service the next day (when Mr. Garden desired me to preach) about fifty at the holy commun [...]. I was glad to see several negroes at church, one of whom told me, "She was there constantly; and that her old mistress (now dead) had many times instructed her in the Christian religion. I asked her, "What religion was?" She said, "She could not tell." I asked, "If she knew what a soul was?" She answered, "No." I said, "Do not you know there is something in you, different from your body? Something you cannot see or feel?" She reply'd, "I never heard so much be­fore." I added, "Do you think then, a man dies altogether as a horse dies?" She said, "Yes, to be sure." O God, where are thy tender mercies? Are they not over all thy works? When shall the Sun of righteousness arise on these outcasts of men, with heal­ing in his wings!

Mond. August 2. I set out for the lieutenant governor's seat, about thirty miles from Charleston, to deliver Mr. Oglethorpe's letters. It stands very pleasant, on a little hill, with a vale on either side, in one of which is a thick wood; the other is planted with rice and Indian corn. I designed to have gone back by Mr. Skeene's, who has about fifty Christian negroes. But my horse tiring, I was obliged to re­turn the straight way to Charleston.

I had sent the boat we came in back to Savannah, expecting a passage thither myself in Col. Bull's. His [Page 54]not going so soon, I went to Ashley-ferry on Thurs­day, intending to walk to Port-Royal. But Mr. Belinger not only provided me a horse, but rode with me himself ten miles, and sent his son with me to Cumbee-ferry twenty miles farther? whence having hired horses and a guide, I came to Beaufort (on Port-Royal) the next evening. We took boat in the morning; but the wind being contrary, and very high, did not reach Savannah till Sunday in the afternoon.— Finding Mr. Oglethorpe was gone, I stayed only a day [...] Savannah: and leaving Mr. Ingham and Dela­motte there, set out on Tuesday morning for Fre­derica. In walking to Thunderbolt, I was in so heavy a shower, that all my cloaths were as wet as if I had gone through the river. On which occasion I cannot but observe that vulgar error, concerning the hurtful­ness of the rains and dews of America. I have been throughly wet with these rains more than once; yet without any harm at all. And I have lain many nights in the open air, and received all the dews that fell. And so I believe might any one, if his constitution was not impaired by the softness of a genteel educa­tion.

At Thunderbolt we took boat, and on Friday, Aug, 13. came to Frederica, where I delivered Mr. O. the letters I had brought from Carolina. The next day he set out for Fort St. George. From that time I had less and less prospect of doing good at Fre­derica; many there being extremely zealous, and in­defatigably diligent to prevent it: and few of the rest daring to shew themselves of another mind, for fear of their displeasure.

Sat. 28. I set apart (out of the few we had) a few books towards a library at Frederica. In the afternoon I walked to the fort on the other side of the island. About five we set out homeward. But my guide not being perfect in the way, we were soon lost in the [Page 55]woods. We walked on however as well as we could, till between nine and ten, when being heartily tired, and throughly wet with dew, we lay down and slept till morning.

About day-break, on Sunday the 29th, we set out again endeavouring to walk straight forward, and soon after sun-rise found ourselves in the Great Savannah near Frederica. By this good providence I was deli­vered from another fear, that of lying in the woods, which experience shewed, was to one in tolerable health a mere lion in the way.

Thurs. Sept. 2. I set out in a sloop, and about ten on Sunday morning, came to Skidoway; which (after reading prayers, and preaching to a small congrega­tion) I left and came to Savannah in the evening.

Mond. 13. I began reading with Mr. Delamotte, bishop Beveridge's Pandect [...] Canonum Conciliorum.— Nothing could so effectually have convinced us, that both particular and general councils may err, and have erred: and that things ordained by them as necessary to salvation, have neither strength [...]or authority, unless they be taken out of holy scripture.

Mond. 20. We ended (of which also I must con­fess. I once thought more highly than I ought to think) the apostolical canons; so called, as bishop Beveridge observes, because partly grounded upon, partly agreeing with, the traditions delivered down from the apostles. But he farther observes (in the 159th page of his Code [...] Ga­nonum Ecclesiae Primitivae: and why did he not observe it in the first page of the book?) They contain the discipline used in the church at the time when they were collected: not when the council of Nice met; for then many parts of it were useless and obsolete.

Tuesd. October 12. We considered if any thing could yet be done, for the poor people of Frederica. And I submitted to the judgment of my friends, which was, that I should take another journey thither: [Page 56]Mr. Ingham undertaking to supply my place at Savan­nah, for the time I should stay there. I came thither on Sat. the 16th, and found few things better than I expected. The morning and evening prayers, which were read for a while after my leaving the place, had been long discontinued, and from that time every thing grew worse and worse: not many retaining any more of the form than the power of godliness.

I was at first a little discouraged, but soon remem­bered the word which cannot fail, Greater is he that is in you than he that is in the world. I cried to God to arise and maintain his own cause: and after the evening prayers were ended, invited a few to my house (as I did every night while I stayed at Frederica.) I read to them one of the exhortations of Ephraim Syrus, the the most awakening writer (I think) of all the an­cients. We concluded our reading and conversation with a psalm, and I trust, our God gave us his bles­sing.

Mond. 18. Finding there were several Germans at Frederica, who not understanding the English tongue, could not join in our public service, I desired them to meet me at my house; which they did every day at noon from thence forward. We first sung a German hymn, then I read a chapter in the New Testament, then explained it to them as well as I could. After another hymn we concluded with prayer.

Mond. 25. I took boat, and after a flow and dan­gerous passage, came to Savannah on Sunday the 31st.

Tues. Novem. 23. Mr. Oglethorpe sailed for Eng­land, leaving Mr. Ingham, Mr. Delamotte and me at Savannah, but with less prospect of preaching to the Indians, than we had the first day we set foot in Ame­rica. Whenever I mentioned it, it was immediately replied, "You cannot leave Savannah without a mi­nister." To this indeed my plain answer was, "I know [Page 57]not that I am under any obligation to the contrary. I never promised to stay here one [...]. I [...]ly de­clared both before, at, and ever [...] [...], that I neither would nor could take charge of the Eng­lish any longer than till I could go among the Indians." If it was said, "But did not the trustees of Georgia appoint you to be minister of Savannah?" I replied "They did; h [...]t it was not done by my solicitation [...] it was done without either: my desire or knowledge. Therefore I cannot conceive that appointment to lay me under any obligation of continuing there, any longer than till a door is opened to the Heathens; and this I expressly declared, at the time I consented to accept of that appointment." But though I had no other obligation not to leave Savannah now, yet that of love I could not break through: I could not resist the importunate request of the more serious parishion­ers, "To watch over their souls yet a little longer, till some one came who might supply my place." And this I the more willingly did, because the time was not come to preach the gospel of peace to the Hea­thens; all their nations being in a ferment: and Pau­stoobee and Mingo Mattaw, having told me, in terms, in my own house, "Now our enemies are all about us, we can do nothing but sight: but if the beloved ones should ever give us to be at peace, then we would hear the great word."

Thurs. Dec. 9. Hearing of [...] dangerously ill, I went to her immediately: she [...], "That she had many things to say:" but h [...] weakness prevented her saying them the [...]; [...] the next day God required her soul of her.

Wed. 23. Mr. Delamotte and I, with a guide, set out to walk to the Cowpens; when we had walked two or three hours, our guide told us plainly, "He did not know where we were." However, believing it could not be far off, we thought it best to go on. In [Page 58]an hour or two we came to a Cypress Swamp, which lay directly across our way: there was not time to walk back to Savannah before night; so we walked through it, the water being about breast-high. By that time we had gone a mile beyond it, we were out of all path; and it being now past sun-set, we sat down, intending to make a fire, and to stay there till morn­ing; but finding our tinder wet, we were at a stand; I advised to walk on still: but my companions being faint and weary, were for lying down, which we ac­cordingly did about six o'clock: the ground was as wet as our cloaths, which (it being a sharp frost) were soon froze together; however, I slept till six in the morning. There fell a heavy dew in the night, which covered us over as white as snow. Within an hour after sun-rise, we came to a plantation, and in the evening, without any hurt to Savannah.

Tues. 28. We set out by land with a better guide for Frederica. On Wednesday evening we came to Fort-Argyle, on the back of the river Ogeechy. The next afternoon we crossed Cooanoochy river in a small cano [...], our horses swimming by the side of it. We made a fire on the bank, and notwithstanding the rain, slept quietly till the morning.

Sat. Jan. 1, 1737. Our provisions fell short, our journey being longer than we expected: but having a little barbe [...]d bears-flesh (i. e. dried in the sun) we boiled it, and found it wholesome food. The next day we reached [...], the settlement of the Scotch highlanders, a sober, industrious, friendly, hospitable people; whose minister, Mr. M ^cLeod, is a serious, resolute, and (I hope) a pious man.

On Monday evening we left Darien, and on Wed. 5. came to Frederica. Most here were as we expected, cold and heartless: we found not one who retained his first love. O send forth thy light and thy truth, that [Page 59]they may guide them! Let them not yet follow their own imaginations!

After having beaten the air in this unhappy place for twenty days, on January 26, I took my final leave of Frederica. It was not any apprehension of my own danger (though my life had been threatened many times) but an utter despair of doing good there, which made me content with the thought of seeing it no more.

In my passage home, having procured a celebrated book, the works of Nicholas Machiavel, I set myself carefully to read and consider it. I began with a prejudice in his favour; having been informed, he had often been misunderstood, and greatly misrepresented. I weighed the sentiments that were less common; transcribed the passages wherein they were contained; compared one passage with another, and endeavoured to form a cool, impartial judgment. And my cool judgment is, that if all the other doctrines of devils which have been committed to writing, since letters were in the world, were collected together in one volume, it would fall short of this: and, that should a prince form himself by this book, so calmly recom­mending hypoerisy, treachery, lying, robbery, op­pression, adultery, whoredom and murder of all kinds; Domitian or Nero would be an angel of light, com­pared to that man.

Mon. Jan. 31. We came to Savannah. Tuesday Feb. 1. being the anniversary feast, on account of the first convoy's landing in Georgia, we had a sermon and the holy communion. Thurs. 24. It was agreed Mr. Ingham should go for England, and endeavour to bring over (if it should please God) some of our friends to strengthen our hands in his work. Sat. 26. He left Savannah.

By Mr. Ingham I writ to Dr. Bray's associates, who had sent a parochial library to Savannah. It is [Page 60]expected of the ministers who receive these, to send an account to their benefactors of the method they use in catechising the children, and instructing the youth of their respective parishes. That part of the letter, was as follows:

"Our general method is this: A young gentleman who came with me, teaches between thirty and forty children to read, write, and cast accounts. Before school in the morning, and after school in the after­noon, he catechizes the lowest class, and endeavours to fix something of what was said, in their understand­ings as well as their memories. In the evening he in­structs the larger children. On Saturday in the after­noon I catechize them all. The same I do on Sunday before the evening service. And in the church, im­mediately after the second lesson, a select number of them having repeated the catechism and been examined in some part of it, I endeavour to explain at large, and to enforce that part, both on them and the congrega­tion.

"Some time after the evening service, as many of my parishioners as desire it, meet at my house (as they do also on Wednesday evening) and spend about an hour in prayer, singing and mutual exhortation. A smaller number (mostly those who design to communi­cate the next day) meet here on Saturday evening: and a few of these come to me on the other evenings, and pass half an hour in the same employment."

Fri. March 4. I writ the trustees for Georgia an account of our year's expence from March 1, 1736, to March 1, 1737. Which, deducting extraordinary expences (such as repairing the parsonage house, and journies to Frederica) amounted for Mr. Delamotte and me to 44 l. 4 s. 4 d.

From the directions I received from God this day, touching an affair of the greatest importance, I could not but observe (as I had done many times before) the [Page 61]entire mistake of those, who assert, "God will not answer your prayer, unless your heart be wholly re­signed to his will." My heart was not wholly re­signed to his will. Therefore, not daring to depend on my own judgment, I cried the more earnestly to him, to supply what was wanting in me. And I know and am assured, he heard my voice, and did send forth his light and his truth.

Thurs. 24. A fire broke out in the house of Ro­bert Hows, and in an hour burnt it to the ground. A collection was made for him the next day; and the generality of the people shewed a surprizing will­ingness, to give a little out of their little, for the re­lief of a necessity greater than their own.

About this time Mr. L [...]cy of Thunderbolt called upon me; when observing him to be in a deep sadness, I asked, what was the reason of it? And a terrible one indeed he gave in the relation following.

In 1733, David Jones, a sadler, a middle-aged man, who had for some time before lived at Notting­ham, being at Bristol, met a person there; who after giving him some account of Georgia, asked, Whether he would go thither? Adding, his trade (that of a sadler) was an exceeding good trade there, upon which he might live creditably and comfortably. He objected his want of money to pay his passage, and buy some tools which he should have need of. The gentleman (Capt. W.) told him, he would supply him with that, and hire him a shop when he came to Georgia, wherein he might follow his business, and so repay him, as it suited his convenience. Accordingly to Georgia they went; where soon after his arrival, his master (as he now stiled himself) sold him to Mr. Lacy, who set him to work with the rest of his ser­vants in clearing land. He commonly appeared much more thoughtful than the rest, often stealing into the woods alone. He was now sent to do some work on [Page 62]an island, three or four miles from Mr. Lacy's great plantation. Thence he desired the other servants to return without him, saying, He would stay and kill a deer. This was on Saturday. On Monday they found him on the shore, with his gun by him, and the fore-part of his head shot to pieces. In his pocket was a paper-book, all the leaves thereof were fair, except one, on which ten or twelve verses were writ­ten; two of which were these (which I transcribed thence, from his own hand, writing)

Sun. April 3. And every day in this great and holy week, we had a sermon and the holy communion.

Mon. 4. I began learning Spanish, in order to converse with my Jewish Parishioners: some of whom seem nearer the mind that was in Christ, than many of those who call him Lord.

Tues. 12. Being determined, if possible, to put a stop to the proceedings of one in Carolina, who had married several of my parishioners without either banns or licence, and declared, "He would do so still:" I set out in a sloop for Charleston. I landed there on Thursday, and related the case to Mr. Garden, the bishop of London's commissary, who assured me, "he would take care no such irregularity should be com­mitted for the future."

Sun. 17. Mr. Garden (to whom I must ever ac­knowledge myself indebted for many kind and gene­rous offices) desiring me to preach, I did so, on those words of the epistle for the day, Whatsoever is born of God, overcometh the world. To that plain account of the Christian state which these words naturally lead me to give, a man of education and character seriously objected. (what is indeed a great truth) "Why if this [Page 63]be Christianity, a Christian must have more courage than Alexander the Great."

Tues. 19. We left Charleston; but meeting with stormy and contrary winds, after losing our anchor, and beating out at sea all night, on Thurs. 21, we with some difficulty got back into Charleston harbour.

Fri. 22. It being the time of their annual visita­tion, I had the pleasure of meeting with the clergy of South Carolina: among whom in the afternoon there was such a conversation for several hours, on "Christ our Righteousness," as I had not heard at any visitation in England, or hardly on any other oc­casion.

Sat. 23. Mentioning to Mr. Thompson, minister of St. Bartholomew's, near Ponpon, my being disap­pointed of a passage home by water, he offered me one of his horses, if I would go by land, which I gladly accepted of. He went with me twenty miles, and sent his servant to guide me the other twenty to his house. Finding a young negro there, who seemed more sensible than the rest, I asked her how long she had been in Carolina? She said, two or three years; but that she was born in Barbadoes, and had lived there in a minister's family from a child. I asked, Whether she went to church there? She said, Yes, every Sun­day,—to carry my mistress's children. I asked what she had learned at church? She said, Nothing; I heard a deal; but did not understand it. But what did your master teach you at home? Nothing. Nor your mis­tress? No. I asked, "But don't you know, that your hands and feet, and this you call your body, will turn to dust in a little time? She answered, Yes. But there is something in you that will not turn to dust, and this is what they call your soul. Indeed, you can't see your soul, though it is within you, as you can't see the wind, though it is all about you. But if you had not a soul in you, you could no more see, [Page 64]or hear, or feel, than this table can. What do you think will become of your soul, when your body turns to dust? I don't know. Why, it will go out of your body, and go up there, above the sky, and live always. God lives there. Do you know who God is? No. You can't see him, any more than you can see your own soul. It is he that made you and me, and all men and women, and all beasts and birds, and all the world. It is he that makes the sun shine, and rain fall, and corn and fruits to grow out of the ground. He makes all these for us. But why do you think he made us? What did he make you and me for? I can't tell. He made you to live with him­self above the sky. And so you will, in a little time,—if you are good. If you are good, then when your body dies, your soul will go up, and want nothing, and have whatever you can desire. No one will beat or hurt you there. You will never be sick, You will never be sorry any more, nor afraid of any thing. I can't tell you, I don't know how happy you will be: for you will be with God.

The attention with which this poor creature listen­ed to instruction is inexpressible. The next day she remembered all, readily answered every question; and said, She would ask him that made her, to shew her how to be good.

Sun. 24. I preached twice at Ponpon chapel, o [...] the 13th chapter of the first epistle to the Corinthians. O how will even those men of Carolina, who come eight, ten, or twelve miles to hear the gospel, rise i [...] judgment against those who hear it not, when it is preached at their own doors!

Wednes. 27. I came to Mr. Belinger's plantation at Chulifinny, where the rain kept me till Friday. Here I met with an half Indian (one that had an In­dian mother, and a Spanish father) and several ne­groes, who were very desirous of instruction. One [Page 65]of them said, "When I was at Ashley-Ferry, I went to church every Sunday. But here we are buri­ed in the woods. Though if there was any church within five or six miles, I am so lame I can't walk, but I would orawl thither."

Mr. Belinger sent a negro lad with me to Purrys­burg, or rather to the poor remains of it. O how hath God stretched over this place the lines of confusion, and the stones of emptiness! Alas for those whose lives were here vilely cast away, through oppression, through divers plagues and troubles! O earth! How long wilt thou hide their blood! How long wilt thou cover thy slain?

This lad too I found both very desirous and very capable of instruction. And perhaps one of the easiest and shortest ways to instruct the American negroes in Christianity, would be first to enquire after and find out some of the most serious of the planters. Then having enquired of them, which of their slaves were best inclined and understood English, to go to them from plantation to plantation, staying as long as appear­ed necessary at each. Three or four gentlemen in Caro­lina I have been with, that would be sincerely glad of such an assistant; who might pursue his work with no more hindrance than must every where attend the preaching of the gospel.

Sat. 30. I came to Savannah, and found my little flock in a better state than I could have expect­ed: God having been pleased greatly to bless the endeavours of my fellow-labourer, while I was absent from them.

Wednes. May 18. I discovered the first convert to deism that (I believe) has been made here. He was one that for some time had been zealously and ex­emplarily religious. But indulging himself in harm­less company, he first made shipwreck of his zeal, and then of his faith. I have since found several others [Page 66]that have been attacked. They have as yet maintain­ed their ground. But I doubt the devil's apostles are too industrious to let them long halt between two o­pinions.

Wednes. 25. I was sent for by one who had been several years of the church of Rome; but was now deeply convinced (as were several others) by what I had occasionally preached, of the grievous errors that church is in, and the great danger of continuing a member of it. Upon this occasion I could not but reflect on the many advices I had received, to beware of the increase of Popery: but not one (that I re­member) to beware of the increase of infidelity. This was quite surprising, when I considered, 1. That in every place where I have yet been, the number of the converts to Popery bore no proportion to the number of the converts to infidelity. 2. That as bad a religi­on as Popery is, no religion is still worse; a baptized infidel being always found upon the trial, two-fold worse than even a bigotted Papist. 3. That as dan­gerous a state as a Papist is in, with regard to eterni­ty, a Deist is in a yet more dangerous state, if he be not (without repentance) an assured heir of damnati­on. And lastly, That as hard as it is to recover a Papist, it is still harder to recover an infidel: I myself having known many Papists, but never one Deist re­converted.

May 29. Being Whitsunday, four of our scholars, after having been instructed daily for several weeks, were at their earnest and repeated desire, admitted to the Lord's table. I trust their zeal hath stirred up many, to remember their Creator in the days of their youth, and to redeem the time, even in the midst of an evil and adulterous generation.

Indeed about this time we observed the Spirit of God to move upon the minds of many of the children. They began more carefully to attend to the things [Page 67]that were spoken both at home and at church, and a remarkable seriousness appeared in their whole behavi­our and conversation. Who knows but some of them may grow up, to the measure of the stature of the fulness of Christ?

June 25. Mr. Causton (the store-keeper and chief magistrate of Savannah) was seized with a slow fever. I attended him every day (as I did any of my pa­rishioners, who were in any painful or dangerous ill­ness) and had a good hope from the thankfulness he shewed, that my labour was not in vain.

Sun. July 3. Immediately after the holy commu­nion, I mentioned to Mrs. Williamson (Mr. Causton's neice) some things which I thought reproveable in her behaviour. At this she appeared extremely angry, and said, She did not expect such usage from me; and at the turn of the street (through which we were walking home) went abruptly away. The next day Mrs. Causton endeavoured to excuse her, told me, She was exceedingly grieved for what had passed the day before, and desired me to tell her in writing what I disliked; which I accordingly did the day following.

But first, I sent Mr. Causton the following note:

Wednes. 6. Mr. Causton came to my house, with Mr. Bailiff Parker, and Mr. Recorder; and warmly asked, "How could you possibly think I should con­demn you, for executing any part of your office?" I said short, "Sir, what if I should think it the duty of my office, to repel one of your family from the holy communion?" He replied, "If you repel me or my wife, I shall require a legal reason. But I shall trou­ble myself about none else. Let them look to them­selves."

Sat. 9. Meeting with a Frenchman of New Orleans on the Missisippi, who had lived several months among the Chicasaws, he gave us a full and particular account of many things which had been variously related. And hence we could not but remark, What is the re­ligion of nature properly so called; or, that religion which flows from natural reason, unassisted by revela­tion. And that, even in those who have the know­ledge of many truths; and who converse with their beloved ones day and night. But too plainly does it appear by the fruits, That the gods of these Heathens to [...] are but devils.

The substance of his account was this; Some years past the Chicasaws and French were friends. The French were then mingled with the Nautchee Indians, whom they used as slaves; till the Nautchees made a general rising, and took many of the French, prisoners. But soon after, a French army set upon them, killed many and carried away the rest. Among those that were killed were some Chicasaws, whose death the Chi­casaw nation resented; and soon after a French boat was going through their country, they fired into it, [Page 69]and killed all the men but two. The French resolved [...]n revenge, and orders were given for many Indian [...] and several parties of white men, to rendezvous on the 26th of March, 1736, near one of the Chicasaw towns. The [...] party, consisting of fifty men, came thither some days before the time. They staid there till the 24th, but none came to join them. On the 25th, they were attacked by two hundred Chicasaws. The French attempted to force their way through them. Five or six and twenty did so; the rest were taken prisoners. The prisoners were sent two or three to a town to be burnt. Only the commanding officer and one or two more were put to death on the place of the engagement."

"I (said he) and one more, were saved by the warrior who took us. The manner of burning the rest was, holding lighted canes to their arms and legs and several parts of their bodies for some time, and then for a while taking them away. They likewise stuck burning pieces of wood into their flesh all round, in which condition they kept them from morning till evening. But they commonly beat them before they burn them. I saw the priest that was with us carried to be burnt: and from head to foot, he was as black as your coat with the blows which they had given him."

I asked him, "What was their manner of life?" He said, "They do nothing but eat, and drink, and smoak, from morning till night, and in a manner from night till morning. For they rise at any hour of the night when they wake; and after eating and drinking as much as they can, go to sleep again." See The religion of nature truly delineated!

Saturday 23. Reflecting on the state I was now in, I could not but observe in a letter to a friend, "How to attain to the being crucified with Christ, I find not, being in a condition I neither desired, nor [Page 70]expected in America, in ease and honour, and abund­ance. A strange school for him who has but one bu­siness, [...]. ^*

Wednes. 27. I rejoiced to meet once more with that good soldier of Jesus Christ, August Spangenberg; with whom on Monday, August 1, I began my long intended journey to Ebenezer. In the way I told him, "The calm we had so long enjoyed, was now draw­ing to an end: that I hoped he would shortly see I was not (as some had told him) a respecter of per­sons; but was determined (God being my helper) to behave indifferently to all, rich or poor, friends or ene­mies." I then asked his advice as to the difficulty I foresaw, and resolved, by God's grace to follow it.

In the evening we came to New Ebenezer, where the poor Saltzburghers are settled. The industry of this people is quite surprizing. Their sixty huts are neatly and regularly built; and all the little spots of ground between them, improved to the best advant­age. One side of the town, is a field of Indian corn; on the other are the plantations of several private per­sons: all which together one would scarce think it possible for a handful of people to have done in one year.

Wednes. 3. We returned to Savannah. Sund. 7, I repelled Mrs. Williamson from the holy communion. And Mond. 8, Mr. Recorder of Savannah, issued out the warrant following:

Tues. 9. Mr. Jones the constable served the warrant, and carried me before Mr. Bailiff Parker and Mr. Recorder. My answer to them was, that "The giving or refusing the Lord's supper, being a matter purely ecclesiastical, I could not acknowledge their power, to interrogate me upon it." Mr. Parker told me, "However, you must appear at the next court holden for Savannah." Mr. Williamson (who stood by) said, "Gentlemen, I desire Mr. Wesley may give bail for his appearance." But Mr. Parker immediately replyed, Sir, Mr. Wesley's word is suf­ficient.

Wedn. 10. Mr. Causton (from a just regard, as his letter expressed it, to the friendship which had subsisted between us, [...]ill this affair) required me, to give the reasons in the court-house, why I repelled Mrs. Wil­liamson from the holy communion? I answered, "I apprehend many ill consequences may arise from so doing. Let the cause be laid before the trustees."

Thurs. 11. Mr. Causton came to my house, and among many other sharp words said, "Make an end of this matter, thou hadst best. My niece to be used thus! I have drawn the sword, and I will never sheath it, till I have satisfaction."

[Page 72] Soon after he added, "Give the reasons of your repelling her, before the whole congregation," I an­swered, "Sir, if you insist upon it, I will; and so you may be pleased to tell her." He said, "Write to her, and tell her so yourself." I said, I will; and after he went, I wrote as follows.

Mr. Delamotte carrying this, Mr. Causton said, among many other warm sayings, "I am the person that am injured. The affront is offered to me; and I will espouse the cause of my niece. I am ill used; and I will have satisfaction, if it be to be had in the world."

Which way this satisfaction was to [...] had, I did not yet conceive. But on Friday and Saturday it be­gan to appear; Mr. Causton declared to many per­sons, that Mr. Wesley had repelled Sophy from the Holy Communion, purely out of revenge; because he had made [Page 73]proposals of marriage to her, which she rejected, and married Mr. Williamson.

I could not but observe the gracious providence of God, in the course of the lessons all this week. On Mond. evening God spake to us in these words. Call to remembrance the former days, in which you end [...]red a great fight of afflictions: partly whilst ye were made a gazing-stock, both by reproaches and afflictions, and partly [...]ilst ye became companions of them that were so used.— Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompense of reward, For ye have need of patience, that after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.

The evening lesson on Tuesday, was the 11th of the Hebrews; in reading which I was more particu­larly encouraged by his example, who chose rather to suffer affliction with the people of God, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season: esteeming the reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures of Egypt.

The lesson on Wednesday began with these words, Wherefore seeing we are compast about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight—and run with patience the race that is set before us: looking unto Jesus the author and sinisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him, endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.

In the Thursday lesson were these comfortable words, I will never leave thee nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, the Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.

The words of St. James, read on Friday were, Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: and those on Saturday, My brethren, Have not the faith of our Lord Jesus-Christ—with respect of persons.

I was only afraid, lest those who were weak, should be turned out of the way, at least, so far as to forsake [Page 74]the public assembling of themselves together. But I fear­ed where no fear was. God took care of this also. So that on Sunday 14, more were present at the morning prayers, than had been for some months be­fore. Many of them observed those words in the first lesson, Set Naboth on high among the people; and set two men, sons of Belial, before him, to bear witness against him.

Tues. 16. Mrs. Williamson swore to and signed an affidavit, insinuating much more than it asserted; but asserting, "That Mr. Wesley had many times proposed marriage to her, all which proposals she had rejected." Of this I desired a copy: Mr. Causton replied, "Sir, You may have one from any of the News papers in America."

On Thursday or Friday was delivered out a list of twenty-six men, who were to meet as a grand jury, on Monday the 22d. But this list was called in the next day, and twenty-four names added to it. Of this grand jury (forty-four of whom only met) one was a Frenchman, who did not understand English, one a papist, one a profest Infidel, three Baptists, sixteen or seventeen others, Dissenters, and several others who had personal quarrels against me, and had openly vowed revenge.

To this grand jury, on Monday the 22d, Mr. Causton gave a long and earnest charge, To beware of spiritual tyranny, and to oppose the now, illegal authority which was usurped over their consciences. Then Mrs. Williamson's affidavit was read: after which Mr. Causton delivered to the grand jury, a paper intitled

"A list of grievances, presented by the grand jury for Savannah, this [...] day of Aug. 1737."

This the majority of the grand jury altered in some particulars, and on Thurs. Sept. 1, delivered [Page 75]it again to the court, under the form of two present­ments, containing ten bills, which were then read to the people.

Herein they asserted, upon oath, "That John Wesley, Clerk, had broken the laws of the realm, con­trary to the peace of our Sovereign Lord the King, his crown and dignity.

"1.|By speaking and writing to Mrs. Williamson, against her husband's consent:

"2.|By repelling her from the Holy Communion:

"3.|By not declaring his adherence to the church of England:

"4.|By dividing the morning service on Sundays:

"5.|By refusing to baptize Mr. Parker's child otherwise than by dipping, except the parents would certify it was weak, and not able to bear it:

"6.|By repelling William Gough from the Holy Communion:

"7.|By refusing to read the burial service over the body of Nathamel Polhill:

"8.|By calling himself Ordinary of Savannah.

"9.|By refusing to receive William Aglionby, as a godfather, only because he was not a communicant:

"10.|By refusing Jacob Matthews for the same reason: and baptizing an Indian trader's child with only two sponsors." (This, I own was wrong; for I ought, at all hazards, to have refused baptizing it till he had procured a third.)

Frid. 2. Was the third court, at which I ap­peared, since my being carried before Mr. P. and the recorder.

I now moved for an immediate hearing on the first bill, being the only one of a civil nature: but it was refused. I made the same motion in the afternoon; but was put off till the next court day.

On the next court day I appeared again; as also at the two courts following: but could not be heard, [Page 76] because (the Judge said) Mr. Williamson was gone out of town.

The sense of the minority of the grand jurors themselves (for they were by no means unanimous) concerning these presentments, may appear from the following paper, which they transmitted to the trustees.

This was signed by twelve of the grand jurors, of whom three were constables, and six more, tything­men: who consequently would have made a majority, had the jury consisted, as it regularly should have done, of only fifteen members, viz. the four constables and eleven tythingmen.

Friday, Sept. 30. Having ended the homilies, I began reading Dr. Rogers's eight sermons to the congregation: hoping they might be a timely anti­dote against the poison of infidelity, which was now with great industry propagated among us.

October the 7th, I consulted my friends, whether God did not call me, to return to England? The reason for which I left it had now no force; there being no possibility as yet of instructing the Indians: neither had I as yet found or heard of any Indians on the continent of America, who had the least desire of being instructed. And as to Savannah, having never engaged myself, either by word or letter, to stay there a day longer than I should judge convenient, nor ever take charge of the people any otherwise, than as in my passage to the Heathens, I looked up­on myself to be fully discharged therefrom, by the vacating of that design. Besides, there was a pro­bability of doing more service to that unhappy peo­ple in England, than I could do in Georgia, by re­presenting [Page 79]without fear or favour to the trustees, the real state the colony was in. After deeply consider­ing these things, they were unanimous, That I ought to go: but not yet. So I laid the thoughts of it aside for the present: being persuaded, that when the time was come, God would make the way plain before my face.

Sat. Oct. 15. Being at Highgate, a village five miles from Savannah, consisting of (all but one) French families, who, I found, knew but little of the English tongue, I offered to read prayers there in French every Saturday in the afternoon. They em­braced the offer gladly. On Saturday the 22d I read prayers in German likewise, to the German villagers of Hampstead: and so continued to do, once a week. We began the service (both at Highgate and Hamp­stead) with singing a psalm. Then I read and ex­plained a chapter in the French or German testament, and concluded with prayers and another psalm.

Sat. Oct. 22. Some of the French of Savannah were present at the prayers at Highgate. The next day I received a message from them all, "That as I read prayers to the French of Highgate, who were but few, they hoped I would do the same to those of Sa­vannah, where there was a large number who did not understand English." Sund. 30, I began so to do: and now I had full employment for that holy day. The first English prayers lasted from five till half an hour past six. The Italian (which I read to a few Vaudois) began at nine. The second ser­vice for the English (including the sermon and the holy communion) continued from half an hour past ten, till about half an hour past twelve. The French service began at one. At two I catechised the chil­dren. About three began the English service. After this was ended, I had the happiness of joining with as many as my largest room would hold, in reading, [Page 80]prayer, and singing praise. And about six the service of the Moravians, so called, began: at which I was glad to be present, not as a teacher, but a learner.

Thurs. Nov. 3. I appeared again, at the court holden on that day: and again, at the court held Tuesday, Nov. 22. On which day Mr. Causton de­sired to speak with me. He then read me some af­fidavits which had been made, Sept. 15, last past: in one of which it was affirmed, "That I then abus­ed Mr. Causton in his own house, calling him liar, villain, and so on." It was now likewise repeated before several persons (which indeed I had forgot) "That I had been reprimanded at the last court, for an enemy to, and hinderer of, the public peace."

I again consulted my friends, who agreed with me, that the time we looked for was now come. And the next morning calling on Mr. Causton, I told him, "I designed to set out for England immediate­ly." I set up an advertisement in the Great-square to the same effect, and quietly prepared for my journey.

Fri. Dec. 2. I proposed to set out for Carolina about noon, the tide then serving. But about ten the magistrates sent for me, and told me, "I must not go out of the province; for I had not answered the allegations laid against me." I replied, I have ap­peared at six or seven courts successively, in order to an­swer them. But I was not suffered so to do, when I desired it time after time. Then they said, "However, I must not go, unless I would give security to answer those allegations at their court." I asked, "What security?" After consulting together about two hours, the Recorder shewed me a kind of bond, en­gaging me under a penalty of fifty pounds, to appear at their court when I should be required. He added, But Mr. Williamson too has desired of us, that you should give bail to answer his action. I then told him plainly, [Page 81] Sir, you use me very ill, and so you do the trustees. I will give neither any bond, nor any bail at all. You know your business, and I know mine.

In the afternoon the magistrates published an order, requiring all the officers and centinels, to prevent my going out of the province; and forbidding any per­son so to do. Being now only a prisoner at large, in a place where I knew by experience, every day would give fresh opportunity, to procure evidence of words I never said, and actions I never did; I saw clearly the hour was come for leaving this place: and as soon as evening prayers were over, about eight o'clock, the tide then serving, I shook off the dust of my feet, and left Georgia, after having preached the gos­pel there (not as I ought, but as I was able) one year, and nearly nine months.

During this time I had frequent opportunities of making many observations and enquiries, concerning the real state of thie province (which has been so variously represented) the English settlements therein, and the Indians that have intercourse with them. These I minuted down from time to time; a small extract of which I have subjoined.

1. Georgia lies in the 30th and 31st degree of north latitude. The air is generally clear, the rains being much shorter, as well as heavier, than in Eng­land. The dews are very great. Thunder and light­ning are expected almost every day, in May, June, July, and August. They are very terrible, especially to a stranger. During those months, from ten in the morning to four in the afternoon, the sun is extremely scorching. But the sea-breeze generally blows, from [...]en till three or four. The winter is nearly of the same length as in England. But the mid-day sun is always warm, even when the mornings and evenings are very sharp, and the nights piercing cold.

[Page 82] 2. The land is of four sorts, pine-barren, oak-land, swamp and marsh. The pine-land is of far the great­est extent, especially near the sea-coasts. The soil of this is a dry, whitish sand, producing shrubs of seve­ral sorts, and between them a spiry, coarse grass, which cattle do not love to feed on. But here and there is a little of a better kind, especially in the sa­vannahs (so they call the low, watry meadows, which are usually intermixed with pine-lands). It bears na­turally two sorts of fruit, wortle-berries (much like those in England) and Chincopin-nuts; a dry, harsh nut, about the size of a small acorn. A laborious man may in one year clear and plant four or five acres of this land: it will produce the first year, from two to four bushels of Indian corn, and from four to eight of Indian pease per acre. The second year it usual­ly bears half as much; the third, less; the fourth, nothing.

3. Vines, mulberries and peach-trees it bears well. The white mulberry is not good to eat. The black is about the size of a black-berry, and has much the same flavour. In fresh pine-land, Indian potatoes grow well (which are more luscious and larger than the Irish). And so do water-melons and sewee-beans, about the size of our scarlet, but to be shelled and eaten like Windsor beans.

4. Oak-land commonly lies in narrow streaks be­tween pine-land and some swamp, creek or river. The soil is a blackish sand, producing several kinds of oak (though none exactly like the English) bay, laurel, ash, walnut, sumac-trees, gum-trees (a fort of sycamore) dog-trees (covered in spring with large white flowers) and many hickory-trees, which bear a bad [...]nd of walnut. In the moistest part of this land some parsimmon-trees grew (which bear a sort of yellow, clear, luscious plumb) and a few mulberry and cherry-trees. The common wild grapes are of [Page 83]two sorts, both red: the fox-grape grows two or three only on a stalk, is thick-skinned, large-stoned, of a harsh taste, and of the size of a small Kentish cherry. The cluster-grape is of a harsh taste too, and about the size of a white currant.

5. This land requires much labour to clear; but when it is cleared, it will bear any grain, for three, four, or sometimes five years, without laying any manure upon it. An acre of it generally bears ten bushels of Indian corn, besides five of pease, in a year. So that this at present is justly esteemed the most valuable land in the province.

6. A swamp is, any low, watry place, which is covered with trees or canes. They are here of three sorts, cypress, river and cane swamps. Cypress swamps are, mostly, large ponds, in and round which cypresses grow. Most river-swamps are overflown every tide, by the river which runs through or near them. If they were drained, they would produce good rice; as would the cane-swamps also; which in the mean time are the best feeding for all sorts of cattle.

7. The marshes are of two sorts: soft marsh, which is all a quagmire, and absolutely good for nothing: and hard-marsh, which is a firm, but barren sand, bearing only sower rushes. Marshes of both sorts abound on the sea islands, which are very numerous and contain all sorts of land. And upon these chief­ly, near creeks and runs of water, juniper-trees and cedars grow.

8. Savannah stands on a flat bluff (so they term any high-land hanging over a creek or river) which rises forty-five feet perpendicular from the river, and commands it several miles both upward and downward. The soil is a white sand for above a mile in breadth, south-east and north-west. Beyond this, eastward, is a river-swamp; westward a small wood, in which was the old Indian town. On the other side of the river [Page 84]is a marshy island, covered with large trees. South­west of the town is a large pine-barren, which ex­tends backward to a branch of the Altamahaw river.

9. St. Simon's island, having on the south-cast the gulph of Florida; on the other sides, branches of the Altamahaw, is about one hundred miles south of Savannah, and extends in length about twenty, in breadth from two to five miles. On the west side of it, on a low bluff, stands Frederica, having woods to the north and south; to the east, partly woods, partly savannahs, and partly marshes. The soil is mostly a blackish sand. There is not much pine-land on the island; the greatest part being oak-land, intermixed with many savannahs, and old Spanish or Indian fields.

10. On the sea-point, about five miles south-east of the town, is the fort where the soldiers are station­ed. But the storehouse in Frederica better deserves that name; being encompassed with regular ramparts of earth, and a palisaded ditch, and mounted with can­non, which intirely command the river.

11. About twenty miles north-west from St. Si­mon's is Darien, the settlement of the Scotch High­landers, a mile from Fort King George, which was built about seventeen and abandoned about eleven years since. The town lies on the main-land, close to a branch of the Altamahaw, on a bluff about thirty feet above the river, having woods on all sides. The soil is a blackish sand. They built at first many scat­tered huts; but last spring (1736) expecting the Spaniards, they built themselves a large fort, and all retired within the walls of it.

12. Augusta, distant from Savannah one hundred and fifty miles, and five from old Savannah Town, is designed to stand in an old Indian field, on a bluff, about thirty feet high. A small fort of wooden piles was built there in 1737; but no house was then built, [Page 85]nor any more ground cleared, than Mr. Lacy and his men found so.

13. Old Ebenezer, where the Saltzburghers settled at first, lies twenty-five miles west of Savannah. A small creek runs by the town, down to the river, and many brooks run between the little hills: but the soil is a hungry, barren sand; and upon any sudden show­er, the brooks rise several feet perpendicular, and over­flow whatever is near them. Since the Saltzburghers removed, two English families have been placed there: but these too say, That the land is good for nothing; and that the creek is of little use: it being by water twen­ty miles to the river; and the water generally so low in summer-time, that a boat cannot come within six or seven miles of the town.

14. New Ebenezer, to which the Saltzburghers re­moved, in March 1736, lies six miles eastward from the old, on a high bluff, near the Savannah river. Here are some tracts of fruitful land, though the greatest part of that adjoining to the town, is pine­barren. The huts, sixty in number, are neatly and regularly built; the little piece of ground allotted to each for a garden, is every where put to the best use, no spot being left unplanted. Nay, even one of the main streets, being one more than was as yet want­ed, bore them this year a crop of Indian corn.

15. About ten miles east of this, on a creek, three miles from the river, was the village of Abercorn. Ten families settled here in 1733; but it is now without inhabitants. Four miles below the mouth of Abercorn-creek in Joseph's-town, is the settlement of two Scotch gentlemen. A mile below was Sir Francis Bathurst's plantation. And a quarter of a mile from this, Walter Augustine's settlement. But both these are left without inhabitant.

16. A mile below this is Capt. Williams's plan­tation: a mile from thence, Mrs. Matthews's, (late [Page 86]Musgrove) commonly known by the name of the Cowpens: adjoining to which is the land belonging so Capt. Watson; on which is an unfinished house, swiftly running to ruin. A mile from this is Irene, [...] [...]use built for an Indian school, in the year 1736. [...] stands on a small, round hill, in a little piece of fruitful ground, given by the Indians to Mr. Ingham. The Indian town is within a furlong of it.

17. Five miles south-west of Savannah, on a small rise, stands the village of Highgate. It has pine­land on three sides, and a swamp on the fourth. Twelve families were placed here in 1733; nine whereof remain there. A mile eastward of this is Hampstead, settled with twelve families also, a little before Highgate; five of which are still remain­ing.

18. Six miles south-east of Savannah is Thunder­bolt. Three families are settled here, near a small, ruinous fort: four miles south of this is the island of Skidoway: on the north-east point whereof ten fami­lies were placed in 1734; (a small fort was built here likewise) but nine of them are either dead, or removed to other places. A small creek divides Skidoway from Tybee island, on the south-east part of which, fronting the inlet, the light-house is built. Ten families were settled here in 1734; but they are part dead, and part removed, so that the island is now again without any fixed inhabitant.

19. Twelve miles southward from Savannah (by land) is Mr. Houstoun's plantation: and forty or fifty miles from him, up Ogeechy river, that where Mr. Sterling for some time lived. Fort Argyle stands twenty miles from this, on a high bluff, by the river Ogeechy. It is a small, square, wooden fort, musket­proof. Ten freeholders were settled near it; but eight of them are gone, and the land they had clear­ed [Page 87]lying waste, will in a few years be as it was be­fore.

20. The southernmost settlement in Georgia, is Fort St. Andrew. It stands fifty miles south of Fre­derica, on the south-west side of Cumberland-island, upon a high neck of land, which commands the river both ways. The walls are of wood, filled up with earth, round which are a ditch and palisade.

21. It is hard to pick out any consistent account of the Georgian Indians, from the contradictory relations of their traders. The following is extracted, partly from those wherein all, or the generality of them agree; partly from the relations of such as have been occasion­ally amongst them, and have no interest in making them better or worse than they are.

22. Of the Georgian Indians in general it may be observed, That they are not so properly nations, as tribes or clans, who have wandered thither at differ­ent times; perhaps expelled their native countries by stronger tribes; but how or when they cannot tell, being none of them able to give any rational account of themselves. They are inured to hardships of all kinds, and surprisingly patient of pain. But as they have no letters, so they have no religion, no laws, no civil government. Nor have they any kings or princes, properly speaking; their Meekos or head-men, hav­ing no power either to command or punish, no man obeying them any farther than he pleases. So that every one doth what is right in his own eyes; and if it appears wrong to his neighbour, the person aggriev­ed usually steals on the other unawares, and shoots him, scalps him, or cuts off his ears: having only two short rules of proceeding, to do what be will, and what he can.

23. They are likewise all, except (perhaps) the Choctaws, gluttons, drunkards, thieves, dissemblers, [Page 88]liars. They are implacable, unmerciful: murderers of fathers, murderers of mothers, murderers of their own children: it being a common thing for a son to shoot his father or mother, because they are old and past labour; and for a woman either to procure abor­tion, or to throw her child into the next river, be­cause she will go with her husband to the war. In­deed husbands, strictly speaking, they have none: for any man leaves his wife (so called) at pleasure, who, frequently, in return, cuts the throats of all the children she has had by him. Whoredom they account no crime, and few instances appear of a young In­dian woman's refusing any one. Nor have they any fixed punishment for adultery; only, if the husband take his wife with another man, he will do what he can to both, unless speedily pacified by the present of a gun or a blanket.

24. The Choctaws only have some appearance of an entire nation, possessing a large extent of land, eight or nine hundred miles west of Savannah, and many well inhabited towns. They are said to have six thou­sand fighting men, united under one head. At pre­sent they are in league with the French, who have sent some priests among them; by whom (if one may credit the Choctaw traders) ten or twelve have been baptized.

25. Next to these, to the north-east, are the Chi­casaws: Their country is flat, full of meadows, springs and rivers. In their fields, though six [...] seven hundred miles from the sea, are found sea-she [...] in great numbers. They have about nine hundred fighting men, ten towns, and one Meeko (at least) in every one. They are eminently gluttons, eating, drinking, and smoaking all day, and almost all night. They are extreme indolent and lazy, except in war [...] then they are the most indefatigable, and the most valiant of all the Indians; but they are equally cruel [Page 89]with the rest, torturing and burning all their prisoners, whether Indian or European.

26. East of them, in the latitude of 35 and 36, about three or four hundred miles from Savannah, lie the Cherokees. Their country is very mountainous, fruitful, and pleasant. They have fifty-two towns, and above three thousand fighting men. In each town are three or more head-men, who keep up a sort of shadow of government, having power to set the rest to work, and to punish such as will not join in the common labour. They are civil to strangers, and will do any thing for them, for pay; being always willing, for a small piece of money, to carry a mes­sage for fifty or sixty miles, and, if required, a heavy burthen too: but they are equally cruel to prisoners with the Chicasaws, though not equally valiant. They are seldom intemperate in drinking, but when they can be so on free-cost. Otherwise, love of drink yields to covetousness: a vice scarcely to be found in any Indian but a Cherokee.

27. The Uchees have only one small town left (near two hundred miles from Savannah) and about forty fighting men. The Creeks have been many times on the point of cutting them off. They are indeed hated by most, and despised by all the other nations, as well for their cowardice, as their superlative diligence in thieving, and for out-lying all the Indians upon the continent.

28. The Creek Indians are about four hundred miles from Savannah. They are said to be bounded on the west by the Choctaws, to the north by the Chicasaws, to the east by the Cherokees, and to the south by the Alatamahaw river. They have many towns, a plain, well-watered country, and fifteen hundred sighting men. They have often three or four Meekos in a town; but without so much as the shadow of authority, only to give advice, which every one is at [Page 90]liberty to take or leave. But age and reputation for valour and wisdom, have given Chicali, a Meeko of the Coweta-town, a more than ordinary influence over the nation; though not even the shew of regal power. Yet neither age, wisdom nor reputation can restrain him from drunkenness. Indeed all the Creeks, hav­ing been most conversant with white men, are most in­fected with an insatiate love of drink, as well as many other European vices, They are more exquisite dis­semblers than the rest of their countrymen. They know not what friendship or gratitude means. They shew no inclination to learn any thing; but least of all, Christianity; being full as opiniated of their own parts and wisdom, as either the modern Chinese, or ancient Romans.

Sat. Dec. 3. We came to Purrysburg early in the morning, and endeavoured to procure a guide to Port-Royal. But none being to be had, we set out with­out one, an hour before sun-rise. After walking two or three hours, we met with an old man, who led us into a small path, near which was a line of blazed trees, (i. e. marked by cutting off part of the bark) by fol­lowing which, he said, we might easily come to Port-Royal in five or six hours.

We were four in all; one of whom intended to go to England with me; the other two to settle in Caro­lina. About eleven we came into a large swamp, where we wandered about till near two. We then found another blaze, and pursued it, till it divided into two; one of these we followed through an almost impassable thicket, a mile beyond which it ended. We made through the thicket again, and traced the other blaze till that ended too. It now grew toward sun-set, so we sat down, faint and weary, having had no food all day, except a ginger-bread cake, which I had taken in my pocket. A third of this we had divided among us at noon; another third we took [Page 91]now; the rest we reserved for the morning; but we had met with no water all the day. Thrusting a stick into the ground, and finding the end of it moist, two of our company fell a digging with their hands, and at about three feet depth, found water. We thanked God, drank, and were refreshed. The night was sharp; however, there was no complaining among us; but after having commended ourselves to God, we lay down close together, and (I at least) slept till near six in the morning.

Sun. Dec. 24. God renewing our strength, we arose neither faint nor weary, and resolved to make one trial more, to find out a path to Port-Royal. We st [...]ed due east; but finding neither path nor blaze, and the woods growing thicker and thicker, we judged it would be our best course to return, if we could, by the way we came. The day before, in the thickest part of the woods, I had broke many young trees, I knew not why, as we walked along: these we found a great help in several places, where no path was to be seen; and between one and two God brought us safe to Benjamin Arieu's house, the old man we left the day before.

In the evening I read French prayers to a numerous family, a mile from Mr. Arieu's; one of whom un­dertook to guide us to Port-Royal. In the morning we set out. About sun-set, we asked our guide, if he knew where he was? Who frankly answered, No. However, we pushed on [...]till about seven when we came to a plantation, and the next evening (after many difficulties and delays) we landed on Port-Royal island.

Wednes. 7. We walked to Beaufort; where Mr. Jones (the minister of Beaufort) with whom I lodged during my short stay here, gave me a lively idea of the old English hospitality. On Thurs. Mr. Delamotte came; with whom, on Friday the 9th, I took boat [Page 92]for Charleston. After a slow passage by reason of contrary winds, and some conflict (our provisions fall­ing short) with hunger as well as cold, we came thither early in the morning, on Tuesday the 13th. Here I expected trials of a different kind, and far more dangerous. For contempt and want are easy to be borne: but who can bear respect and abundance?

Wednes. 14. Being desired to read public prayers, I was much refreshed with those glorious promises, contained both in the 72d Psalm, and in the first lesson, the 40th chapter of Isaiah. Yea, they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, and mount up with wing [...] as eagles [...] they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not saint.

In the afternoon visiting a dying man, we found him still full of the freshest advices, and busy in settling the affairs of the C [...]arina, Prince Thamas, and the Ottoman Porte. How natural then is the thought

For if a soul quivering on the verge of life, h [...] still leisure for these impertinencies, one might almost believe the same dreams would continue even in the sleep of death!

Friday, 16. I parted from the last of those friends, who came with me into America, Mr. Charles Dela­motte, from whom I had been but a few days sepa­rate, since Oct. 14, 1735.

Sun. 18. I was seized with a violent flux, which I felt came not before I wanted it. Yet I had strength enough given to preach once more to this [...] people: and a few believed our report.

Thurs. 22. I took my leave of America (though if it please God not for ever) going on board the Samuel, Captain P [...]rcy, with a young gentleman who [Page 93]had been a few months in Carolina, one of my pa­rishioners of Savannah, and a Frenchman, late of Parrysburg, who was escaped thence with the skin of his teeth.

Sat. 24. We sailed over Charleston bar, and about noon lost sight of land.

The next day the wind was fair, but high, as it was on Sunday 25, when the sea affected me more than it had done in the sixteen weeks of our passage to America. I was obliged to lie down the greate [...] part of the day, being easy only in that posture.

Mon. 26. I began instructing a negro-lad in the principles of Christianity. The next day I resolved to break off living delicately, and return to my old simplicity of diet: and after I did so, neither my stomach nor my head much complained of the mo­tion of the ship.

Wednes. 28. Finding the unaccountable appre­hensions of I know not what danger (the wind being small, and the sea smooth) which had been upon me several days, increase; I cried earnestly for help; and it pleased God as in a moment to restore peace to my soul.

Let me observe hereon, 1. That not one of these hours ought to pass out of my remembrance, till I attain another manner of spirit, a spirit equally willing to glorify God by life or by death. 2. That whoever is uneasy on any account (bodily pain alone except­ed) carries in himself his own conviction, that he is so far an unbeliever. Is he uneasy at the apprehen­sion of death? Then he believeth not, That to die is gain. At any of the events of life, then he hath not a firm belief, That all things work together for his good. And if he bring the matter close, he will always find, beside the general want of faith, every particular un­easiness is evidently owing to the want of some par­ticular Christian temper.

[Page 94] Sun. Jan. 1, 1738. All in the ship (except the Cap­tain and steersman) were present both at the morning and evening service, and appeared as deeply attentive, as even the poor people of Frederica did, while the word of God was new to their ears. And it may be, one or two among these likewise, may bring forth fruit with patience.

Mon. 2. Being sorrowful and very heavy (though I could give no particular reason for it) and utterly unwilling to speak close to any of my little flock (about twenty persons) I was in doubt, whether my neglect of them was not one cause of my own heavi­ness? In the evening therefore, I began instructing the cabin-boy; after which I was much easier.

I went several times the following days, with a de­sign to speak to the sailors, but could not, I mean, I was quite averse from speaking; I could not see how to make an occasion, and it seemed quite absurd to speak without. Is not this what men commonly mean by, "I could not speak?" And is this a suf­ficient cause of silence, or no? Is it a prohibition from the Good Spirit? Or a temptation from nature or the evil one? Fri. 6. I ended the abridgment of Mr. de Renty's life. O that such a life should be related by such a historian! Who by inserting all, if not more than all the weak things that holy man ever said or did, by his commendation of almost every action or word which either deserved or needed it not; and by his injudicious manner of relating many others, which were indeed highly commendable; has cast the shade of superstition and folly over one of the brightest patterns of heavenly wisdom.

Sat. 7. I began to read and explain some passages of the bible to the young negro. The next morn­ing, another negro who was on board, desired to be a hearer too. From them I went to the poor French­man, who understanding no English, had none else [Page 95]in the ship with whom he could converse. And from this time, I read and explained to him a chapter in the testament every morning.

Sun. 8. In the fulness of my heart, I wrote the following words:

By the most infallible of proofs, inward feeling, I am convinced

1. "Of unbelief, having no such faith in Christ, as will prevent my heart from being troubled; which it could not be, if I believed in God, and rightly be­lieved also in him:

2. "Of pride, throughout my life past, inasmuch as I thought I had, what I find I have not:

3. "Of gross irrecollection, inasmuch as in a storm I cry to God every moment; in a calm, not.

4. "Of levity and luxuriancy of spirit, recurring whenever the pressure is taken off, and appearing by my speaking words not tending to edify; but most, by my manner of speaking of my enemies.

"Lord save, or I perish! Save me

1. "By such a faith as implies peace in life and in death.

2. "By such humility, as may fill my heart from this hour for ever, with a piercing uninterrupted sense, ^† Nihil est quod hactenus feci, having evidently built without a foundation.

3. "By such a recollection as may cry to thee every moment, especially when all is calm; give me faith or I die; give me a lowly spirit; otherwise ^‡ Mihi non sit suave vivere.

4. "By steadiness, seriousness, [...], sobriety of spirit, avoiding as fire every word that tendeth not to edifying, and never speaking of any who oppose me, or sin against God, without all my own sins set in array before my face."

[Page 96] This morning, after explaining those words of St. Paul, I beseech you, brethren, by the mercies of God, [...] ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, accepta­ble to God. I exhorted my fellow-travellers with all my might, to comply with the apostle's direction. But leaving them afterwards, to themselves, the serious­ness they shewed at first, soon vanished away.

On Mond. 9, and the following days, I reflected much on that vain desire, which had pursued me for so many years, of being in solitude, in order to be a Christian. I have now, thought I, solitude enough. But am I therefore the nearer being a Christian? Not if Jesus Christ be the model of Christianity, I doubt indeed I am much nearer that mystery of Satan, which some writers affect to call by that name. So near, that I had probably sunk wholly into it, had not the great mercy of God just now thrown me up­on reading St. Cyprian's works. O my soul, come not thou into their secret! Stand thou in the good old paths.

Frid. 13. We had a thorough storm, which obliged us to shut all close, the sea breaking over the ship con­tinually. I was at first afraid; but cried to God and was strengthened. Before ten I lay down. I bless God, without fear. About midnight we were awaked by a confused noise, of seas and wind and men's voices, the like to which I had never heard before. The sound of the sea breaking over, and against the sides of the ship, I could compare to nothing but large cannon, or American thunder. The rebound­ing, starting, quivering motion of the ship, much re­sembled what is said of earthquakes. The captain was upon deck in an instant. But his men could not hear what he said. It blew a complete harricane; which beginning at south west, then went west, north­west, north, and in a quarter of an hour, round by the east to the south-west point again. At the same [Page 97]time the sea running (as they term it) mountain high, and that from many different points at once, the ship would not obey the helm; nor indeed could the steers­man, through the violent rain, see the compass. So he was forced to let her run before the wind, and in half an hour the stress of the storm was over.

About noon the next day it ce [...]ed. But first I had resolved, God being my helper, not only to preach it to all, but to apply the word of God to every sin­gle soul in the ship; and if but one, yea if not one of them will hear, I know my labour is not in vain.

I no sooner executed this resolution, than my spirit revived; so that from this day I had no more of that fearfulness and heaviness, which before almost con­tinually weighed me down. I am sensible one who thinks the being in orco, as they phrase it, an indis­pensable preparative for being a Christian, would say, I had better have continued in that state; and that this unseasonable relief was a curse, not a blessing. Nay, but who art thou, O man, who in favour of a wretched hypothesis, thus blasphemest the good gift of God? Hath not he himself said, This also is the gift of God, if a man have power to rejoice in his labour? Yea, God setteth his own seal to his weak endea­vours, while the thus answereth him in the joy of his heart.

Tues. 24. We spoke with two ships, outward­bound, from whom we had the welcome news, of our wanting but 160 leagues of the land's-end. My mind was now full of thought; part of which I writ down as follows:

"I went to America, to convert the Indians; but oh! Who shall convert me! Who, what is he tha [...] will deliver me from this evil heart of unbelief? I have a fair summer religion. I can talk well; nay, and believe myself, while no danger is near: but let death look me in the face, and my spirit is troubled. Nor can I say, To die is gain!

[Page 99] in the morning (the wind continuing southerly) the clouds began to fly just contrary to the wind, and to the surprize of us all, sunk down under the sun, so that at noon we had an exact observation; and by this we found we were as well as we could desire, about eleven leagues south of Scilly.

Sund. 29. We saw English land once more, which about noon appeared to be the Lizard-point. We ran by it with a fair wind, and at noon the next day, made the west end of the Isle of Wight.

Here the wind turned against us, and in the even­ing blew fresh, so that we expected (the tide being likewise strong against us) to be driven some leagues backward in the night: but in the morning, to our great surprize, we saw Beachy-head just before us, and found we had gone forwards near forty miles.

Toward evening was a calm; but in the night a strong north-wind brought us safe into the Downs. The day before Mr. Whitefield had failed out, neither of us then knowing any thing of the other. At four in the morning we took boat, and in half an hour landed at Deal: it being Wednesday, February 1. the anniversary festival in Georgia for Mr. Oglethorpe's landing there.

It is now two years and almost four months, since I left my native country, in order to teach the Georgian Indians, the nature of Christianity: but what have I learned myself in the mean time? Why (what I the least of all suspected) that I who went to America to convert others, was never myself converted to God. ^* I am not mad, though I thus speak; but I speak the words of truth and soberness; If haply some of those who still dream may awake, and see, that as I am, so are they.—

Are they read in philosophy? So was I. In ancient or modern tongues? So was I also. Are they versed [Page 100]in the science of divinity? I too have studied it many years. Can they talk fluently upon spiritual things? The very same could I do. Are they plenteous in alms? Behold, I gave all my goods to feed the poor. Do they give of their labour as well as of their sub­stance? I have laboured more abundantly than they all. Are they willing to suffer for their brethren? I have thrown up my friends, reputation, ease, country; I have put my life in my hand, wandering into strange lands; I have given my body to be devoured by the deep, parched up with heat, consumed by toil and weariness, or whatsoever God should please to bring upon me. But does all this (be it more or less, it matters not) make me acceptable to God? Does all I ever did or can know, say, give, do, or suffer, justify me in his sight? Yea, or the constant use of all the means of grace? (which nevertheless is meet, right, and our bounden duty). Or, that I know nothing of myself, that I am as touching outward, moral righte­ousness, blameless? Or (to come closer yet) the hav­ing a rational conviction of all the truths of Christianity? Does all this give me a claim to the holy, heavenly, divine character of a Christian? By no means. If the oracles of God are true, if we are still to abide by the law and the testimony; all these things, though when ennobled by faith in Christ, they are holy, and just and good, yet without it are dung and dross, meet only to be purged away by the sire that never shall be quenched. ^*

This then have I learned in the ends of the earth, that I am fallen short of the glory of God: that my whole heart is altogether corrupt and abominable, and conse­quently my whole life (seeing it cannot be, that an evil tree should bring forth good fruit): that alienated [Page 101]as I am from the life of God, I am a child of wrath; ^* an heir of hell: that my own works, my own sufferings, my own righteousness, are so far from reconciling me to an offended God, so far from making any atonement for the least of those sins, which are more in number than the hairs of my head, that the most specious of them need an atone­ment themselves, or they cannot abide his righteous judgment; that heaving the sentence of death in my heart, and having nothing in or of myself, to plead, I have no hope, but that of being justified freely, through the redemption that is in Jesus: I have no hope, but that if I seek I shall find Christ, and be found in him, not hav­ing my own righteousness, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by saith.

If it be said, that I have faith (for many such things have I heard, from many miserable comforters) I answer, So have the devils,— a sort of faith; but still they are strangers to the covenant of promise. So the apostles had even at Cana in Galilee, when Jesus first manifested forth his glory; even then they, in a sort believed on him; but they had no then the faith that overcometh the world. The faith I want is, A sure trust and consulence in God, that through the merits of Christ, my sins are forgiven, and I reconciled to the fa­vour of God. I want that faith which St. Paul re­commends to all the world, especially in his epistle to the Romans: that faith which enables every one that hath it to cry out, I live not; but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. I want that faith which none can have without knowing that he hath it (though many imagine they have it, who have it not) for whosoever hath it, is freed from sin, the whole body of sin is destroyed in him: he is freed from fear, having peace with God through Christ, and rejoice­ing [Page 102]in hope of the glory of God. And he is freed from doubt, having the love of God shed abroad in his heart, through the Holy Ghost which is given unto him; which spirit itself beareth witness with his Spirit, that he is a child of God.

JOURNAL From Feb. 1, 1738, to Sept. 16, 1738.

WEDNESDAY, Feb. 1. After reading prayers and explaining a portion of scripture to a large company at the inn, I left Deal, and came in the evening to Feversham.

I here read prayers, and explained the 2d lesson, to a few of those who were called Christians, but in­deed were more savage in their behaviour than the wildest Indians I have yet met with.

Fri. 3. I came to Mr. Delamotte's at Blendo [...], where I expected a cold reception. But God had prepared the way before me: and I no sooner men­tioned my name, than I was welcomed in such a man­ner, as constrained me to say, Surely God is in this place, and I knew it not! Blessed be ye of the Lord! Ye have shewn more kindness in the latter and than in the beginning.

In the evening I came once more to London, whence I had been absent two years and near four months.

Many reasons I have to bless God, though the de­sign I went upon did not take effect, for my having been carried into that strange land, contrary to all my preceding resolutions. Hereby I trust he hath in some measure humbled me and proved me, and shewn me what was in my heart. Hereby I have been taught, to beware of men. Hereby I am come to know as­suredly, [Page 110]that if in all our ways we acknowledge God, he will where reason fails, direct our path, by the other means which he knoweth. Hereby I am de­livered from the fear of the sea, which I had both dreaded and abhorred from my youth.

Hereby God has given me to know many of his servants, particularly those of the church of Hern­huth. Hereby my passage is opened to the writings of holy men in the German, Spanish and Italian tongues. I hope too some good may come to others hereby. All in Georgia have heard the word of God. Some have believed, and began to run well. A few steps have been taken towards publishing the glad tidings both to the African and American Hea­thens. Many children have learned how they ought to serve God, and to be useful to their neighbour. And those whom it most concerns have an opportunity of knowing the true state of their infant colony, and laying a firmer foundation of peace and happiness to many generations.

Sat. 4. I told my friends some of the reasons; which a little hastened my return to England. They all agreed it would be proper to relate them to the trustees of Georgia.

Accordingly the next morning I waited on Mr. Oglethorpe, but had not time to speak on that head. In the afternoon I was desired to preach at St. John the Evangelist's. I did so on those strong words, If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature. I was after­wards informed, Many of the best in the parish were so offended, that I was not to preach there any more.

Mond. 6. I visited many of my old friends, as well as most of my relations. I find the time is not yet come when I am to be hated of all men. O may I be prepared for that day!

Tues. 7. (A day much to be remembered) at the house of Mr. Weinantz, a Dutch merchant, I met [Page 111]Peter Bohler, Schulius Richter and Wensel Neiser, just then landed from Germany. Finding they had no acquaintance in England, I offered to procure them a lodging, and did so near Mr. Hutton's, where I then was. And from this time I did not willingly lose any opportunity of conversing with them, while I stayed in London.

Wednes. 8. I went to Mr. Oglethorpe again, but had no opportunity of speaking as I designed. Af­terwards I waited on the board of trustees, and gave them a short but plain account of the state of the colony: an account, I fear, not a little differing from those which they had frequently received before: and for which I have reason to believe, some of them have not forgiven me to this day.

Sund. 12. I preached at St. Andrew's, Holborn, on, Though I give all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.—O hard sayings! Who can hear them? Here too (it seems) I am to preach no more.

Wednes. 15. I waited on the trustees again, and gave them in writing the substance of what I had said at the last board. Whatsoever farther questions they asked concerning the state of the province, I likewise answered to the best of my knowledge.

Fri. 17. I set out for Oxford with Peter Bohler, where we were kindly received by Mr. Sarney, the only one now remaining here, of many who at our embarking for America, were used to take sweet coun­sel together, and rejoice in bearing the reproach of Christ.

Sat. 18. We went to Stanton-Harcourt, to Mr. Gambold, and found my old friend recovered from his mystic delusion, and convinced that St. Paul was a better writer than either Tauler or Jacob Behman. The next day I preached once more at the castle (in Oxford) to a numerous and serious congregation.

[Page 112] All this time I conversed much with Peter Bohler, but I understood him not: and least of all when be­said, ‘ Mi frater, mi frater, excoquenda est ista tua phi­losophia.’ (My brother, my brother, that philo­sophy of your's must be purged away.)

Mond. 20. I returned to London. On Tuesday I preached at Great St. Helen's, on, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his crost daily and follow me.

Wedn. 22. I was with the trustees again, to whom I then gave a short account (and afterwards delivered it to them in writing) of the reasons why I lest Georgia.

Sun. 26. I preached at six at St. Lawrence's; at ten, in St. Katherine's Creed-church; and in the afternoon, at St. John's, Wapping. I believe it pleased God to bless the first sermon most, because it gave most offence; being indeed an open defiance of that mystery of iniquity which the world calls pru­dence: grounded on those words of St. Paul to the Galatians; As many as desire to make a fair shew in the flesh, they constrain you to be circumcised, only lest they should suffer persecution for the cross of Christ.

Mond. 27. I took coach for Salisbury, and had several opportunities of conversing seriously with my fellow travellers. But endeavouring to mend the wis­dom of God, by the worldly wisdom of prefacing seri­ous with light conversation, and afterwards following that advice of the mystics, leave them to themselves, all I had said was written on the sand. Lord, lay not this sin to my charge!

Tues. 28. I saw my mother once more. The next day I prepared for my journey to my brother at Tiverton. But on Thursday morning, March 2d, a message that my brother Charles was dying at Oxford obliged me to set out for that place immediately. Calling at an odd house in the afternoon, I found [Page 113]several persons there, who seemed well-wishers to re­gion, to whom I spake plainly; as I did in the even­ing, both to the servants and strangers at my inn.

With regard to my own behaviour, I now renewed and wrote down my former resolutions.

1. To use absolute openness and unreserve, with all I should converse with.

2. To labour after continual seriousness, not wil­lingly indulging myself, in any the least levity of be­haviour, or in laughter, no not for a moment.

3. To speak no word which does not tend to the glory of God, in particular, not to talk of worldly things. Others may, nay, must. But what is that to thee? And

4. To take no pleasure which does not tend to the glory of God; thanking God every moment for all I do take, and therefore rejecting every sort and de­gree of it, which I feel I cannot so thank him in and for.

Sat. 4. I found my brother at Oxford, recovering from his pleurisy; and with him Peter Bohler: by whom (in the hand of the great God) I was on Sun­day the 5th clearly convinced of unbelief, of the want of that faith whereby alone we are saved with full christian salvation.

Immediately it struck into my mind ‘Leave off preaching. How can you preach to others, who have not faith yourself?’ I asked Bohler, whether he thought I should leave it off, or not? He answer­ed, "By no means." I asked, ‘But what can I preach?’ He said, ‘Preach faith till you have it, and then, because you have it, you will preach faith.’

Accordingly, Monday 6, I began preaching this new doctrine, though my soul started back from the work. The first person to whom I offered salvation by faith alone, was a prisoner under sentence of death. [Page 114]His name was Clifford. Peter Bohler had many times desired me to speak to him before. But I could not prevail on myself so to do; being still (as I had been many years) a zealous assertor of the impossibility of a death-bed repentance.

Fri. 10. Peter Bohler returned to London. Tues. 15. I set out for Manchester, with Mr. Kinchin, Fellow of Corpus Christi, and Mr. Fox, late a pri­soner in the city prison. Between five and six we called at Chappel on the Heath, where lived a [...] man, sometime prisoner in the castle of Oxford. He was not at home; but his wife came to us, to whom Mr. Kinchin spoke a few words, which so melted her heart, that she burst out into tears, and we went on rejoicing and praising God.

About eight, it being rainy and very dark we [...] our way; but before nine, came to Shipston, having rode over, I know not how, a narrow foot-bridge, which lay a-cross a deep ditch near the town. After supper I read prayers to the people of the inn, and explained the second lesson; I hope not in vain.

The next day we dined at Birmingham, and [...] after we left it, were reproved for our negligence them (in letting those who attended us go, without exhorta­tion or instruction) by a severe shower of hail. At Hedgesord, about five, we endeavoured to be more faithful; and all who heard, seemed serious and af­fected.

In the evening we came to Stafford. The mistress of the house joined with us in family-prayer. The next morning, one of the servants appeared deeply affected, as did the hostler before we went. Soon after breakfast, stepping into the stable, I spake a few words to those who were there. A stranger who heard me, said, Sir, I wish I was to travel with you. And wh [...] I went into the house followed me, and began abrupt­ly, Sir, I believe you are a good man, and I come to [...] [Page 115]you a little of my life. The tears stood in his eyes all the time he spoke; and we hoped not a word which was said to him was lost.

At Newcastle, whither we came about ten, some to whom we spoke at our inn, were very attentive; but a gay young woman waited on us, quite unconcerned: however we spoke on. When we went away, she fixed her eyes, and neither moved nor said one word, but appeared as much astonished as if she had seen one risen from the dead.

Coming to Holms-chapel about three, we were sur­prized at being shewn into a room, where a cloth and plates were laid. Soon after two men came in to din­ner. Mr. Kinchin told them, "If they pleased, that gentleman would ask a blessing for them." They stared, and as it were consented; but sat still while I did it, one of them with his hat on. We began to speak on turning to God, and went on, though they appeared utterly regardless. After a while their coun­tenances changed, and one of them stole off his hat, and laying it down behind him said, ‘All we said was true; but he had been a grievous sinner, and not considered it as he ought: but he was resolved, with God's help, now to turn to him in earnest.’ We exhorted him and his companion, who now likewise drank in every word, to cry mightily to God, that he would send them help from his holy place.

Being faint in the evening, I called at Altringham, and there light upon a Quaker, well skilled in, and therefore (as I soon found) sufficiently fond of, con­troversy. After an hour spent therein (perhaps not in vain) I advised him, ‘To dispute as little as possible, but rather follow after holiness, and walk humbly with his God.’

Late at night we reached Manchester. Friday the 17th, we spent intirely with Mr. Clayton, by whom, and the rest of our friends here, we were much refresh­ed [Page 116]and strengthened. Mr. Hoole, the rector of St. Ann's church being taken ill the next day, on Sunday 19, Mr. Kinchin and I officiated at Salford chapel in the morning, by which means Mr. Clayton was at liberty to perform the service of St. Ann's: and in the afternoon, I preached there on those words of St. Paul, If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature.

Early in the morning we left Manchester, taking with us Mr. Kinchin's brother, for whom we came, to be entered at Oxford. We were fully determined to lose no opportunity of awakening, instructing, or exhorting any whom we might meet with in our journey. At Knutsford, where we first stopped, all we spake to, thankfully received the word of exhorta­tion. But at Talk in the hill, where we dined, she with whom we were, was so much of a gentlewomen, that for near an hour our labour seemed to be in vain. However we spoke on. Upon a sudden, she looked as one just awaked out of a sleep. Every word sunk into her heart. Nor have I seen so entire a change both in the eyes, face, and manner of speaking, of any one in so short a time.

About 5. Mr. Kinchin riding by a man and wo­man double-horsed, the man said, "Sir, you ought to thank God it is a fair day,; for if it rained, you would be sadly dirty with your little horse." Mr. Kinchin answered, "True: and we ought to thank God for our life and health, and food and rai­ment, and all things." He then rode on, Mr. Fox following the man said, "Sir, my mistress would be glad to have some more talk with that gentleman." We stayed, and when they came up, began to search one another's hearts. They came to us again in the evening, at our inn at Stone, where I explained both to them and many of their acquaintance who were come together, that great truth, "Godliness, hath [Page 117]the promise both of this life, and of that which is to come."

Tues. 21. Between 9 and 10 we came to Hedge­ford. Just then, one was giving an account of a young woman, who had dropped down dead there the day before. This gave us a fair occasion to ex­hort all that were present, So to number their own days that they might apply their hearts unto wisdom.

In the afternoon one overtook us whom we soon found more inclined to speak than to hear. However we spoke and spared not. In the evening we over­took a young man, a Quaker, who afterwards came to us, to our inn at Henley, whither he sent for the rest of his family, to join with us in prayer: to which I added, as usual, the exposition of the 2d lesson. Our other companion went with us a mile or two in the morning, and then not only spoke less than the day before; but took in good part a serious cau­tion against talkativeness and vanity.

An hour after, we were overtook by an elderly gen­tleman, who said, "He was going to enter his son at Oxford." We asked, "At what college?" He said, "he did not know: having no acquaintance there on whose recommendation he could depend." After some conversation, he expressed a deep sense of the good providence of God, and told us, "He knew God had cast us in his way, in answer to his prayer." In the evening we reached Oxford, rejoicing in our having received so many fresh instances of that great truth, In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Thurs. 23. I met Peter Bohler again, who now amazed me more and more, by the account he gave of the fruits of living faith, the holiness and happi­ness which he affirmed to attend it. The next morn­ing I began the Greek Testament again, resolving to abide by the law and the testimony, and being confident, [Page 118]that God would hereby shew me, whether this doctrine was of God.

Sund. 26. I preached at Whitam, on the new creature, and went in the evening to a society in Ox­ford, where (as my manner then was at all societies) after using a collect or two and the Lord's prayer, I expounded a chapter in the New Testament, and concluded with three or four more collects and a psalm.

Mond. 27. Mr. Kinchin went with me to the castle, where after reading prayers and preaching, on, It is appointed for men once to die, we prayed with the condemned man, first in several forms of prayer, and then in such words as were given us in that hour. He kneeled down in much heaviness and confusion, having no rest in his bones, by reason of his sins. After a space he rose up, and eagerly said, I am now ready to die. I know Christ has taken away my sins, and there is no more condemnation for me. The same composed cheerfulness he shewed, when he was carried to execu­tion: and in his last moments he was the same, en­joying a perfect peace, in confidence that he was ac­cepted in the beloved.

Sat. April 1. Being at Mr. Fox's society, my heart was so full that I could not confine myself to the forms of prayer, which we were accustomed to use there. Neither do I purpose to be confined to them any more; but to pray indifferently, with a form or without, as I may find suitable to particular occasions.

Sund. 2. Being Easter-day, I preached in our college chapel, on, The hour cometh and now is, when the dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God, and they that [...]ear shall live. I preached in the afternoon first at the castle, and th [...] at Car [...]ax on the same words, I see the promise. But it is afar off.

[Page 119] Believing it would be better for me to wait for the accomplishment of it in silence and retirement, on Mond. 3. I complied with Mr. Kinchin's desire, and went to him at Dummer in Hampshire. But I was not suffered to stay here long; being earnestly pressed to come up to London, if it were only for a few days. Thither therefore I returned, on Tues. 17th.

Sat. 21. I met Peter Bohler once more. I had now no objection to what he said of the nature of faith, viz. That it is (to use the words of our church) A sure trust and confidence which a man hath in God, th [...] through the merits of Christ, his sins are forgiven, and he reconciled to the [...]avour of God. Neither could I deny either the happiness or holiness which he de­scribed, as fruits of this living faith. The Spirit it­self beareth witness with our spirit that we are the chil­dren of God: and, He that believeth hath the witness in himself, fully convinced me of the former: As, Whatsoever is born of God, doth not commit sin; and Whosoever believeth, is born of God, did of the latter. But I could not comprehend what he spoke of an instantaneous work. I could not understand how this faith should be given in a moment: how a man could at once be thus turned from darkness to light, from sin and misery to righteousness and joy in the Holy Ghost. I searched the scriptures again, touching this very thing, particularly the [...]cts of the apostles. But, to my utter astonishment, found scarce any in­stances there of other than instantaneous conversion; scarce any so [...]low as that of St. Paul, who was three days in the pangs of the new birth. I had but one retreat lest, viz. " Thus, I grant God wrought in the first ages of Christianity: but the times are chang­ed. What reason have I to believe, he works in the same manner now?"

But on Sund. 22. I was beat out of this retreat too, by the concurring evidence of several living wit­nesses; [Page 120]who testified God had thus wrought in them­selves; giving them in a moment, such a faith in the blood of his Son, as translated them out of darkness into light, out of sin and fear into holiness and hap­piness. Here ended my disputing. I could now only "cry out, Lord help thou my unbelief!"

I asked P. Bohler again, "Whether I ought not to refrain from teaching others?" He said, "No; Do not hide in the [...]arth the talent God hath given you." Accordingly on Tues. 25. I spoke clearly and fully at Blendon to Mr. Delamotte's family, of the nature and fruits of faith. Mr. Broughton and my brother were there. Mr. Broughton's great ob­jection was, He could never think that I had not faith, who had done and suffered such things. My brother was very angry, and told me I did not know what mischief I had done by talking thus. And indeed it did please God then to kindle a fire, which I trust shall never be extinguished.

On Wednes. 21. The day fixed for my return to Oxford, I once more waited on the trustees for Georgia: but being straitened for time, was obliged to leave the papers for them, which I had designed to give into their own hands. One of these was the instrument whereby they had appointed me minister of Savannah; which having no more place in those parts, I thought it not right to keep any longer.

P. Bohler walked with me a few miles, and ex­horted me not to stop short of the grace of God. At Gerrard's Cross I plainly declared to those whom. God gave into my hands, The faith as it is in Jesus: as I did next day to a young man I overtook on the road, and in the evening to our friends at Oxford. A strange doctrine, which some, who did not care to contradict, yet knew not what to make of; but one or two, who were throughly bruised by sin, will­ingly heard, and received it gladly.

[Page 121] In the day or two following, I was much confirm­ed in the truth that is after godliness, by hearing [...] experiences of Mr. Hutchins (of Pembroke-college) and Mrs. Fox: two living witnessess that God can (at least, if he does not always) give that faith where­of cometh salvation in a moment, as lightning falling from heaven.

Mond. May 1. The return of my brother's ill­ness obliged me again to hasten to London. In the evening I found him at James Hutton's, better as to his health, than I expected; but strongly averse from what he called The New Faith.

This evening our little society began, which af­terwards met in Fetter-lane. Our fundamental rules were as follow.

In obedience to the command of God by St. James, and by the advice of Peter Bohler, it is agreed by us,

1. That we will meet together once a week to con­fess our faults one to another, and pray one for another, that we may be healed:

2. That the persons so meeting be divided into se­veral bands, or little companies, none of them con­sisting of fewer than five or more than ten persons.

3. That every one in order speak as freely, plain­ly, and concisely as he can, the real state of his heart, with his several temptations and deliverances, since the last time of meeting.

4. That all the bands have a conference at eight every Wednesday evening, began and ended with singing and prayer.

5. That any who de [...]ire to be admitted into this society be asked, What are your reasons for desiring this? Will you be entirely open, using no kind of reserve? Have you any objection to any of our orders? (which may then be read.)

[Page 122] 6. That when any new member is proposed, every one present speak clearly and freely whatever objection he has to him.

7. That those against whom no reasonable objec­tion appears, be in order for their trial, formed into one or more distinct bands, and some person agreed on to assist them.

8. That after two months trial, if no objection then appear, they may be admitted into the society.

9. That every fourth Saturday be observed as a day of general intercession.

10. That on the Sunday seven-night following be a general love-feast, from seven till ten in the evening.

11. That no particular member be allowed to act in any thing, contrary to any order of the society: and that if any persons, after being thrice admonished, do not conform thereto, they be not any longer esteemed as members.

Wednes. 3. My brother had a long and particular conversation with Peter Bohler. And it now pleased God to open his eyes; so that he also saw clearly, what was the nature of that one, true living faith, whereby alone, through grace we are saved.

Thurs. 4. Peter Bohler left London in order to embark for Carolina. O what a work hath God be­gun, since his coming into England! Such an one as shall never come to an end, till heaven and earth pass away.

Friday and Saturday, I was at Blendon. They now believed our report. O may the arm of the Lord be speedily revealed unto them!

Sun. 7. I preached at St. Lawrence's in the morn­ing; and afterwards at St. Katherine's Creed-church. I was enabled to speak strong words at both; and was therefore the less surprized at being informed, I was not to preach any more in either of those churches.

[Page 123] Tues. 9. I preached at Great St. Helen's, to a very numerous congregation, on, He that spared not his own Son but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things? My heart was now so enlarged, to declare the love of God, to all that were oppressed by the devil, that I did not wonder in the least, when I was afterwards told, "Sir, you must preach here no more."

Wednes. 10. Mr. Stonhouse, Vicar of Islington, was convinced of the truth as it is in Jesus. From this time till Saturday 13, I was sorrowful and very heavy; being neither able to read, nor meditate, nor sing, nor pray, nor do any thing. Yet I was a little re­freshed by Peter Bohler's letter, which I insert in his own words.

Sun. 14. I preached in the morning at St. Ann's, Aldersgate; and in the afternoon at the Savoy chapel, free salvation by faith in the blood of Christ. I was quickly apprized, that at St. Ann's likewise, I am to preach no more.

So true did I find the words of a friend, wrote to my brother about this time.

"I have seen upon this occasion, more than ever I could have imagined, how intolerable the doctrine of faith is to the mind of man; and how peculiarly in­tolerable to religious men. One may say the most unchristian things, even down to deism; the most en­thusiastic things, so they proceed but upon mental raptures, lights and unions; the most severe things, even the whole rigour of ascetic mortification; and all this will be forgiven. But if you speak of faith in such a manner as makes Christ a Saviour to the utmost, a most universal help and refuge; in such a manner as takes away glorying, but adds happiness to wretched man; as discovers a greater pollution in the best of us, than we could before acknowledge, but brings a great­er deliverance from it than we could before expect: if any one offers to talk at this rate, he shall be heard with the same abhorrence, as if he was going to rob [Page 126]mankind of their salvation, their mediator, or the [...] hopes of forgiveness. I am persuaded that a Monta­nist or a Novatian, who from the height of his purity should look down with contempt upon poor sinners, and exclude them from all mercy, would not be thought such an overthrower of the gospel, as he who should learn from the author of it, to be a friend of Publicans and Sinners, and to sit down upon the level with them, as soon as they begin to repent."

"But this is not to be wondered at. For all religi­ous people have such a quantity of righteousness, ac­quired by much painful exercise, and formed at last into current habits; which is their wealth, both for this world and the next. Now all other schemes of religion, are either so complaisant, as to tell them, they are very rich, and have enough to triumph in: or else only a little rough, but friendly in the main, by telling them, their riches are not yet sufficient, but by such arts of self-denial, and mental refinement, they may enlarge the stock. But the doctrine of faith is a downright robber. It takes away all this wealth, and only tells us, it is deposited for us with some body else, upon whose bounty we must live like mere beggars. Indeed they that are truly beggars, vile and filthy sin­ners till very lately, may stoop to live in this de­pendent condition: it suits them well enough. But they who have long distinguished themselves from the herd of vicious wretches, or have even gone beyond moral men; for them to be told, that they are either not so well, or but the same needy, impotent, insig­nificant vessels of mercy, with the others: this is more shocking to reason, than transubstantiation. For rea­son had rather resign its pretensions to judge what is bread or flesh, than have this honour wrested from it to be the architect of virtue and righteousness. But where am I running? My design was only to give you [Page 127]warning, that wherever you go, this foolishness of preach­ing will alienate hearts from you, and open mouths against you."

Fri. 19. My brother had a second return of his pleurisy. A few of us spent Saturday night in prayer. The next day, being Whitsunday, after hearing Dr. Heylin preach a truly Christian sermon (on, They were all filled with the Holy Ghost: and so, said he, may all you be, if it is not your own [...]ault) and assisting him at the holy communion (his curate being taken ill in the church) I received the surprizing news, that my brother had found rest to his soul. His bodily strength returned also from that hour. Who is so great a God as our God?

I preached at St. John's W [...]pping, at three, and St. Be [...]nett's, Paul's-wharf, in the evening. At these churches likewise I am to preach no more. At St. Antholin's I preached on the Thursday fol­lowing.

Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, I had conti­nual sorrow and heaviness in my heart; something of which I described, in the broken manner I was able, in the following letter to a friend.

"O why is it, that so great, so wise, so holy a God will use such an instrument as me! Lord let the dead bury their dead? But wilt thou send the dead to raise the dead? Yea, thou sendest whom thou wilt send, and shewest mercy by whom thou wilt shew mercy! Amen! Be it then according to thy will! If thou speak the word, Judas shall cast out devils.

I feel what you say (though not enough) for I am under the same condemnation. I see that the whole law of God is holy, just and good. I know every thought, every temper of my soul, ought to bear God's image and superscription. But how am I fallen from the glory of God! I feel, that I am sold [Page 128]under sin. I know, that I too deserve nothing but wrath, being full of all abominations: and having no good thing in me to atone for them, or to remove the wrath of God. All my works, my righteousness, my prayers, need an atonement for themselves. So that my mouth is stopped. I have nothing to plead. God is holy, I am unholy. God is a consuming fire. I am altogether a sinner, meet to be consumed.

"Yet I hear a voice (and is it not the voice of God?) saying, Believe and thou shalt be saved. He that believeth, is passed from death unto life. God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on him, should not perish, but have everlasting life.

"O let no one deceive us by vain words, as if we had already attained this saith! i. e. The proper christian faith. By its fruits we shall know. Do we already feel peace with God, and joy in the Holy Ghost? Does his Spirit bear witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God? Alas, with mine he does not. Nor, I fear with yours. O thou Saviour of men, save us from trusting in any thing but thee! Draw us after thee! Let us be emptied of ourselves, and then fill us with all peace and joy in believing, and let nothing separate us from thy love, in time or in eternity!"

What occurred on Wednesday 24, I think best to relate at large, after premising what may make it the better understood. Let him that cannot receive it, ask of the Father of lights, that he would give more light to him and me.

1. I believe, till I was about ten years old, I had not sinned away that initial grace which was given me in infancy having been strictly edu­cated and carefully taught, that I could only be saved by universal obedience, by [...]eeping all the commandments of God, [...] the meaning of which I was diligently instruct­ed. And those instructions, so far as they respected [Page 129]outward duties and sins, I gladly received, and often thought of. But all that was said to me of inward obedience, or holiness, I neither understood nor re­membered. So that I was indeed as ignorant of the true meaning of the law, as I was of the gospel of Christ.

2. The next six or seven years were spent at school: where outward restraints being removed, I was much more negligent than before even of outward duties, and almost continually guilty of outward [...]ins, which I knew to be such, though they were not scandalous in the eye of the world. However I still read the scrip­tures, and said my prayers, morning and evening. And what I now hoped to be saved by, was, 1. Not being so bad a [...] other people. 2. Having still a kindness for religion. And 3. Reading the bible, going to church, and saying my prayers.

3. Being removed to the university, for five years, I still said my prayers both in public and in private, and read with the scriptures several other books of religion, especially comments on the New Testament. Yet I had not all this while so much as a notion of in­ward holiness: nay, went on habitually and for the most part) very contentedly, in some or other known [...]in: indeed with some intermission and short struggles, especially before and after the Holy Communion, which I was obliged to receive thrice a year: I can­not well tell, what I hoped to be saved by now, when I was continually sinning against the little light I had: unless by those transient fits of what many divines taught me to call repentance.

4. When I was about 22, my father pressed me to enter into holy orders. At the same time the provi­dence of God directing me to Kempis 's Christian Pat­tern, I began to see, that true religion was seated in the heart, and that God's law extended to all our thoughts as well as words and actions. I was how­ever [Page 130]very angry at Kempis, for being too strict, though I read him only in Dean Stan [...]ope's translation. Yet I had frequently much sensible comfort in reading him, such as I was an utter stranger to before: and meeting likewise with a religious friend, which I never had till now, I began to alter the whole form of my conver­sation, and to set in earnest upon a new life. I set apart an hour or two a day for religious retirement. I communicated every week. I watched against all sin, whether in word or deed. I began to aim at, and pray for inward holiness. So that now, doing so much, and living so good a life, I doubted not but I was a good Christian.

5. Removing soon after to another college, I exe­cuted a resolution, which I was before convinced was of the utmost importance, shaking off at once all my trifling acquaintance. I began to see more and more the value of time. I applied myself closer to study. I watched more carefully against actual sins; I advised others to be religious, according to that scheme of re­ligion by which I modelled my own life. But meet­ing now with Mr. Law's Christian Perfection and Se­rious Call (although I was much offended at many parts of both, yet) they convinced me more than ever of the exceeding height, and breadth, and depth of the law of God. The light flowed in so mightily upon my soul, that every thing appeared in a new view. I cried to God for help, and resolved not to prolong the time of obeying him as I had never done before. And by my continued endeavour to keep his whole law, inward and outward, to the utmost of my power, I was persuaded that I should be accepted of him, and that I was even then in a state of salvation.

6. In 17 [...]0, I began visiting the prisons, assisting the poor and sick in town, and doing what other good I could by my presence or my little fortune to the bodies and souls of all men. To this end I abridged [Page 131]myself of all superfluities, and many that are called necessaries of life. I soon became a by-word for so doing, and I rejoiced that my name was cast out as evil. The next spring I began observing the Wednesday and Friday fasts, commonly observed in the ancient church; tasting no food till three in the afternoon. And now I knew not how to go any farther. I dili­gently strove against all sin. I omitted no sort of self-denial which I thought lawful: I carefully used, both in public and private, all the means of grace at all opportunities. I omitted no occasion of doing good; I for that reason suffered evil. And all this I knew to be nothing, unless as it was directed to­ward inward holiness. Accordingly this, the image of God, was what I aimed at in all, by doing his will, not my own. Yet when after continuing some years in this course, I apprehended myself to be near death, I could not find that all this gave me any comfort, or any assurance of acceptance with God. At this I was then not a little surprized: not imagining I had been all this time building on the sand, nor con­sidering that other foundation can no man lay, than that which is laid by God, even Christ Jesus.

7. Soon after, a contemplative man convinced me still more than I was convinced before, that outward works are nothing, being alone; and in several con­versations instructed me, how to pursue inward holi­ness, or a union of the soul with God. But even of his instructions (though I then received them as the words of God) I cannot but now observe, 1. That he spoke so incautiously against trusting in out­ward works, that he discouraged me from doing them at all. 2. That he recommended (as it were, to supply what was wanting in them) mental prayer, and the like exercises, as the most effectual means of purifying the soul, and uniting it with God. Now these were in truth, as much my own works as visiting [Page 132]the sick or cloathing the naked, and the union with God thus pursued, was as really my own righteousness, as any I had before pursued, under another name.

8. In this refined way of trusting to my own works and my own righteousness (so zealously inculcated by the mystic writers) I dragged on heavily, finding no comfort or help therein, till the time of my leaving England. On shipboard however I was again active in outward works; where it pleased God of his free mercy, to give me 26 of the Moravian brethren for companions, who endeavoured to shew me a more ex­cellent way. But I understood it not at first. I was too learned and too wise. So that it seemed foolish­ness unto me. And I continued preaching and fol­lowing after and trusting in that righteousness, where­by no flesh can be justified.

9. All the time I was at Savannah I was thus beat­ing the air. Being ignorant of the righteousness of Christ, which by a living faith in him bringeth salva­tion to every one that believeth, I sought to establish my own righteousness, and so laboured in the fire all my days. I was now, properly under the law; I knew that the law of God was spiritual; I consented to it, that it was good. Yea, I delighted in it, after the inner man. Yet was I carnal, sold under sin. Every day was I constrained to cry out, What I do, I allow not; for what I would, I do not, but what I hate, that I do. To will is indeed present with me: but how to perform that which is good, I find not. For the good which I would, I do not; but the evil which I would not, that I do. I find a law, that when I would do good, evil is present with me: even the law in my mem­bers warring against the law of my mind, and still bring­ing me into captivity to the law of sin.

10. In this vile, abject state of bondage to [...]in, I was indeed fighting continually, but not conquering. Before, I had willingly served sin: now it was un­willingly, [Page 133]willingly, but still I served it. I fell and rose, and fell again. [...]ometimes I was overcome, and in heavi­ness: Sometimes I overcame, and was in joy. For as in the former state, I had some foretastes of the terrors of the law, so had I in this, of the comforts of the gospel. During this whole struggle between nature and grace (which had now continued above ten years) I had many remarkable returns to prayer, especially when I was in trouble: I had many sensible comforts, which are indeed no other than short anticipations of the life of faith. But I was still under the law, not under grace (the state most who are called Christians are con­tent to live and die in.) For I was only striving with, not freed from sin: neither had I the witness of the Spirit with my spirit, and indeed could not; for I sought it not by faith, but (as it were) by the works of the law.

11. In my return to England, January 1738, be­ing in imminent danger of death, and very uneasy on that account, I was strongly convinced that the cause of that uneasiness was unbelief, and that the gaining a true, living faith, was the one thing needful for me. But still I fixed not this faith on its right object: I meant only faith in God, not faith in or through Christ. Again, I knew not that I was wholly void of this faith; but only thought, I had not enough of it. So that when Peter Bohler, whom God prepared for me as soon as I came to London, affirmed of true faith in Christ (which is but one) that it had those two fruits inseparably attending it, "Dominion over sin, and constant peace from a sense of forgiveness," I was quite amazed, and looked up­on it as a new gospel. If this was so, it was clear, I had not faith. But I was not willing to be con­vinced of this. Therefore I disputed with all my might, and laboured to prove, that faith might be where these were not; especially where the sense of [Page 134]forgiveness was not: for all the scriptures relating to this, I had been long since taught to construe away, and to call all Presbyterians who spoke otherwise. Be­sides, I well saw, no one could (in the nature of things) have such a sense of forgiveness, and not feel it. But I felt it not. If then there was no faith without this, all my pretensions to faith dropped at once.

12. When I met Peter Bohler again, he consented, to put the dispute upon the issue which I desired, viz. Scripture and experience. I first consulted the scrip­ture. But when I set aside the glosses of men, and simply considered the word of God, comparing them together, endeavouring to illustrate the obscure by the plainer passages, I found they all made against me, and was forced to retreat to my last hold, "That experience would never agree with the literal interpreta­tion of those scriptures. Nor could I therefore allow it to be true, till I found some living witnesses of it." He replied, "He could shew me such at any time; if I desired it the next day." And accordingly the next day, he came again with three others, all of whom testified of their own personal experience, that a true living faith in Christ, is inseparable from a sease of pardon for all past, and freedom from all present sins. They added with one mouth, that this faith was the gift, the free gift of God, and that he would surely bestow it upon every soul, who earnestly and perseveringly sought it. I was now throughly con­vinced; and by the grace of God, I resolved to seek it unto the end, 1. By absolutely renouncing all de­pendence, in whole or in part, upon my own works or righteousness, on which I had really grounded my hope of salvation, though I knew it not, from my youth up. 2. By adding to the constant use of all the other means of grace, continual prayer for this very thing, justifying, saving faith, a full reliance on the blood of [Page 135]Christ shed for me; a trust in him, as my Christ, as my sole justification, sanctification, and redemption.

13. I continued thus to seek it (though with strange indifference, dulness and coldness, and usually frequent relapses into sin) till Wednesday, May 24. I think it was about five this morning, that I opened my Testament on those words. [...]. There are given unto us exceeding great and precious pro­mises, even that ye should be partakers of the divine na­ture. 2 Pet. i. 4. Just as I went out, I opened it again on those words, Thou art not far from the king­dom of God. In the afternoon I was asked to go to St. Paul's. The anthem was, Out of the deep have I called unto thee, O Lord: Lord hear my voice. O let thine ears consider well the voice of my complaint. If thou, Lord, wilt be extreme to mark what is done amiss, O Lord, who may abide it? But there is mercy with thee; therefore thou shalt be feared. O Israel, trust in the Lord: for with the Lord there is mercy, and with him is plenteous redemption. And he shall redeem Israel from all his sins

14 In the evening I went very unwillingly to a society in Aldersgate-street, where one was reading Luther's preface to the epistle to the Romans. About a quarter before nine, while he was describing the change which God works in the heart through faith in Christ, I felt my heart strangely warmed. I felt I did trust in Christ, Christ alone for salvation: and an assurance was given me, that he had taken away my sins, even mine, and saved me from the law of sin and death.

15. I began to pray with all my might for those who had in a more especial manner despitefully used me and persecuted me. I then testified openly to all there, what I now first felt in my heart. But it was not long before the enemy suggested, "This cannot [Page 136]be faith; for where is thy joy?" Then was I taught, that peace and victory over sin, are essential to faith in the Captain of our salvation: but, that as to the transports of joy that usually attend the beginning of it, espe­cially in those who have mourned deeply, God some­times giveth, sometimes with-holdeth them, according to the counsels of his own will.

16. After my return home, I was much buffeted with temptations: but cried out, and they fled away. They returned again and again. I as often lifted up my eyes, and he sent me help from his holy place. And herein I found the difference between this and my former state chiefly consisted. I was striving, yea, fighting with all my might under the law, as well as under grace. But then I was sometimes, if not often, conquered; now, I was always conqueror.

17. Thurs. May 25. The moment I awaked, "Jesus, Master," was in my heart and in my mouth; and I found all my strength lay in keeping my eye sixed upon him, and my soul waiting on him continually. Being again at St. Paul's in the afternoon, I could taste the good word of God in the anthem, which be­gan, My song shall be always of the loving-kindness of the Lord: with my mouth will I ever be shewing forth thy truth from one generation to another. Yet the enemy injected a fear, "If thou dost believe, why is there not a more sensible change? I answered (yet not I) that I know not. But this I know, I have now peace with God. And I sin not to day, and Jesus my Master has forbid me to take thought for the mor­row."

18. "But is not any sort of fear (continued the tempter) a proof that thou dost not believe?" I de­sired my master to answer for me; and opened his book upon those words of St. Paul. Without were fightings, within were fears. Then inferred I, well may [Page 137]fears be within me; but I must go on, and tread them under my feet.

Friday, May 26. My soul continued in peace, but yet in heaviness, because of manifold temptations. I asked Mr. Telching the Moravian, What to do? He said you must not fight with them, as you did be­fore, but flee from them, the moment they appear, and take shelter in the wounds of Jesus. The same I learned also from the afternoon anthem, which was, My soul truly waiteth still upon God, for of him com­eth my salvation; he verily is my strength and my salva­tion, he is my defence so that I shall not greatly fall. O put your trust in him always, ye people; pour out your hearts before him; for God is our hope.

Sat. 27. Believing one reason of my want of joy, was want of time for prayer, I resolved to do no business till I went to church in the morning, but to continue pouring out my heart before him. And this day my spirit was enlarged; so that though I was now also assaulted by many temptations, I was more than conqueror, gaining more power thereby to trust and rejoice in God my Saviour.

Sunday 28. I waked in peace, but not in joy. In the same even quiet state I was till the evening, when I was roughly attacked in a large company as an en­thusiast, a seducer, and a setter forth of new doc­trines. By the blessing of God I was not moved to anger, but after a calm and short reply went away; though not with so tender concern as was due to those, who were seeking death in the error of their life.

This day I preached in the morning at St. George's Bloomsbury, on, This is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith; and in the afternoon at the chapel in Long-Acre, on God's justifying the ungod­ly; the last time (I understand) I am to preach at either. Not as I will, but as thou wilt.

[Page 138] Mond. 29 I set out for Dummer with Mr. Wolf, one of the first-fruits of Peter Bohler's ministry in England. I was much strengthened by the grace of God in him: yet was his state so far above mine, that I was often tempted to doubt, whether we had one faith? But, without much reasoning about it, I held here; "Though his be strong and mine weak, yet that God hath given some degree of faith even to me, I know by its fruits. For I have constant peace; not one uneasy thought. And I have freedom from sin: not one unholy desire."

Yet on Wednesday did I grieve the Spirit of God, not only by not watching unto prayer, but likewise by speaking with sharpness instead of tender love, of one that was not sound in the faith. Immediately God hid his face and I was troubled; and in this heaviness I continued till the next morning, June 1. When it pleased God, while I was exhorting another, to give comfort to my soul, and (after I had spent some time in prayer) to direct me to those gracious words, Having therefore boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus—Let us draw near with a true heart, in full assurance of faith. Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faith­ful that promised) and let us consider one another, to pro­voke unto love and to good works.

Sat. June 3. I was so strongly assaulted by one of my old enemies, that I had scarce strength to open my lips, or even to look up for help. But after I had prayed, faintly, as I could, the temptation vanish­ed away.

Sun. 4. Was indeed a feast-day. For from the time of my rising till past one in the afternoon, I was praying, reading the scriptures, singing praise, or calling sinners to repentance. All these days I scarce remember to have opened the testament, but upon some great and precious promise. And I saw more [Page 139]than ever, that the gospel, is in truth but one great promise, from the beginning of it to the end.

Tues. 6. I had still more comfort, and peace, and joy: on which I fear I began to presume. For in the evening I received a letter from Oxford which threw me into much perplexity. It was asserted there­in, "That no doubting could consist with the least degree of true faith: that whoever at any time felt any doubt or fear, was not weak in faith, but had no faith at all: and that none hath any faith, till the law of the spirit of life has made him wholly free from the law of sin and death."

Begging of God to direct me, I opened my testa­ment on 1 Cor. iii. ver. 1, &c. where St. Paul speaks of those whom he terms babes in Christ, who were not able to bear strong meat, nay (in a sense) car­nal; to whom nevertheless he says, Ye are God's build­ing, ye are the temple of God. Surely then these men had some degree of faith; though it is plain, their faith was but weak.

After some hours spent in the scripture and prayer, I was much comforted. Yet I felt a kind of fore­ness in my heart, so that I found my wound was not fully healed. O God, save thou me, and all that are weak in the faith, from doubtful disputations!

Wednesday, June 7. I determined, if God should permit, to retire for a short time into Germany. I had fully proposed before I left Georgia so to do, if it should please God to bring me back to Europe. And I now clearly saw the time was come. My weak mind could not bear to be thus sawn asunder. And I hoped the conversing with these holy men, who were themselves living witnesses of the full pow­er of faith, and yet able to bear with those that are weak, would be a means, under God, of so establish­ing my soul, that I might go on from faith to faith, and from strength to strength.

[Page 140] Thurs. 8. I went to Salisbury to take leave of my mother. The next day I left Sarum, and on Saturday came to Stanton-harcourt. Having preach­ed faith in Christ there on Sunday 11, I went on to Oxford; and thence on Monday to London, where I found Mr. Ingham just setting out. We went on board the next day, Tuesday 13, and fell down to Gravesend that night. About four in the afternoon on Wednesday we lost sight of England. We reach­ed the Mease at eight on Thursday morning, and in an hour and a half landed at Rotterdam.

We were eight in all, five English and three Ger­mans. Dr. Koker, a physician of Rotterdam, was so kind, when we set forward in the afternoon, as to walk an hour with us on our way. I never before saw any such road as this. For many miles together, it is raised for some yards above the level, and paved with a small sort of brick, as smooth and clean as the Mall in St. James's. The walnut-trees stand in even rows on either side: so that no walk in a gentle­man's garden is pleasanter. About seven we came to Goudart, where we were a little surprized, at meet­ing with a treatment which is not heard of in Eng­land. Several inns utterly refused to entertain us; so that it was with difficulty we at last found one, where they did us the favour to take our money for some meat and drink, and the use of two or three bad b [...]d [...]. They pressed us much in the morning to see their church, but were displeased at our pulling off our hats when we went in; telling us, "We must not do so; it was not the custom there." It is a large old building, of the Gothic kind, resembling some of our English cathedrals. There is much history-painting in the windows, which they told us, is great­ly admired. About eight we lest Goudart, and in a little more than six hours reached Ysselstein.

[Page 141] Here we were at Baron Wattevil's, as at home. We found with him a few German brethren and sisters, and seven or eight of our English acquaint­ance, who had settled here some time before. They lodged just without the town, in three or four little houses, till one should be built that would contain them all. Saturday 17, was their intercession-day. In the morning, some of our English brethren desired me to administer the Lord's supper: the rest of the day was spent with all the brethren and sisters, in hearing the wonderful work which God is beginning to work over all the earth, and in making our requests known unto him, and giving him thanks for the mightiness of his kingdom.

At six in the morning we took boat. The beauti­ful gardens lie on both sides the river, for great part of the way to Amsterdam, whither we came about five in the evening. The exact neatness of all the buildings here, the nice cleanness of the streets (which, we were informed, were all washed twice a week) and the canals which run through all the main streets, with rows of trees on either side, make this the pleasantest city which I have ever seen. Here we were entertained with truly Christian hospitality, by Mr. Decknatel, a minister of the Mennonists, who suffered us to want nothing while we stayed here, which was till the Thursday following. Dr. Bark­hausen (a physician, a Muscovite by nation) who had been with Mr. Decknatel for some time, shewed us likewise all possible kindness. Remember them, O Lord, for good!

Mond. 17. I was at one of the societies, which lasted an hour and an half. About sixty persons were present. The singing was in Low-Dutch (Mr. Decknatel having translated into Low-Dutch, part of the Hernhuth hymn-book) but the words were so very near the German, that any who understood [Page 142]the original, might understand the translation. The expounding was in High Dutch. I was at another of the societies on Tuesday, where were present about the same number. On Wednesday, one of our com­pany found a sheep that had been lost: his sister, who had lived here for some time with one whom she loved too well, as he did her. But they were now both resolved, by the grace of God (which they accord­ingly executed without delay) To pluck out the right eye, and cast it from them.

Thurs. 22. We took boat at eight in the evening, and landing at four in the morning, walked on to U [...]tfass, which we left about two, having now ano­ther boy added to our number. A little before eight we came to Beurn, a small ill-built city, belonging to the Prince of Orange. Setting out early in the morn­ing, we came to Nimwegen, the last town in Holland, about two in the afternoon: and leaving it at four, came before eight to an inn, two hours short of Cleve.

Sun. 25. After spending an hour in singing and prayer, we walked till near noon, before we could meet with any refreshment. The road would have ap­peared exceeding pleasant, being broad and strait, with tall trees on either side, had not weariness and rain prevented. We hoped to reach Reinberg in the evening, but could not; being obliged to stop two hours short of it, at a little house, where many good Lutherans were concluding the Lord's-day (as is usual among them) with fiddling and dancing!

Mond. 26. We breakfasted at Reinberg, left it at half an hour past ten, and at four came to Urding. Being much tired, we rested here, so that it was near ten at night before we came to Neus. Having but a few hours walk from hence to Colen, we went thither easily, and [...] at five the next evening, into the [...]glic [...]l, dirtiest city, I ever yet saw with my eyes.

[Page 143] Wednes. 28. We went to the cathedral, which is mere heaps upon heaps; a huge, mishapen thing, which has no more of symmetry, than of neatness be­longing to it. I was a little surprized to observe, that neither in this, nor in any other of the Romish churches where I have been, is there, properly speaking any such thing as joint worship: but one prays at one shrine or altar, and another at another, without any regard to, or communication with one another. As we came out of the church, a procession began on the other side of the church-yard. One of our company scrupling to pull off his hat, a zealous Catholic pre­sently cried out, Knock down the Lutheran dog. But we prevented any contest, by retiring into the church.

Walking on the side of the Rhine in the afternoon, I saw to my great surprize (for I always thought before, no Romanist of any fashion believed any thing of the story) a fresh painting, done last year at the public expence, on the outside of the city wall, in memory of the bringing in the heads of the three kings (says the Latin inscription) through the gate adjoining: which indeed, in reverence (it seems) to them, has been stopped up ever since.

At four we took boat, when I could not but ob­serve the decency of the Papists, above us who are called reformed. As soon as ever we were seated (and so every morning after) they all pulled off their hats, and each used by himself, a short prayer for our pros­perous journey. And this justice I must do to the very boatmen (who upon the Rhine are generally wicked even to a proverb) I never heard one of them take the name of God in vain, or saw any one laugh when any thing of religion was mentioned. So that I be­lieve the glory of sporting with sacred things, is peculiar to the English nation!

We were four nights on the water, by reason of the swiftness of the stream, up which the boat was drawn [Page 144]by horses. The high mountains o [...] [...]ach side the river, rising almost perpendicular, and yet covered with vines to the very top, gave us many agreeable prospects: a religious house, or old castle, every now and then appearing on the brow of one of them. On Sunday evening, July 2, we came to Mentz; and Monday the 3d, at half an hour past ten, to Frank­fort.

Faint and weary as we were, we could have no admittance here, having brought no passes with us, which indeed we never imagined would have been re­quired, in a time of settled general peace. After waiting an hour at the gates, we procured a messenger, whom we sent to Mr. Bohler (Peter Bohler's father) who immediately came, procured us entrance into the city, and entertained us in the most friendly manner. We set out early in the morning on Tuesday the 4th, and about one came to Marienborn. But I was so ill, that after talking a little with Count Zinzendorf, I was forced to lie down the rest of the day.

The family at Marienborn consists of about ninety persons, gathered out of many nations. They live for the present in a large house hired by the Count, which is capable of receiving a far greater number; but are building one, about three (English) miles off, on the top of a fruitful hill. O how pleasant a thing it is, for brethren to dwell together in unity!

Thurs. 6. The Count carried me with him to the Count of Solmes, where I observed with pleasure the German frugality. Three of the young Countesses (though grown up) were drest in linen; the Count and his son in plain cloth. At dinner, the next day, a glass of wine and a glass of water were set by every one, and if either were emptied, a second. They all conversed freely and unaffectedly. At ten at night we took coach again, and in the morning reached Marienborn.

[Page 145] I lodged with one of the brethren at Eckershausen, an English mile from Marienborn, where I usually spent the day, chiefly in conversing with those who could speak either Latin or English; not being able, for want of more practice, to speak German readily. And here I continually met with what I sought for, viz. Living proofs of the power of faith: persons saved from inward as well as outward sin, by the love of God shed abroad in their hearts; and from all doubt and fear, by the abiding witness of the Holy Ghost given unto them.

Sund. 9. The Count preached in the old castle at Runneberg (about three English miles from Marien­born) where is also a small company of those who seek the Lord Jesus in sincerity. Wednesday 12, was one of the conferences for strangers; where one of Frankfort proposing the question, Can a man be justifi­ed and not know it? The Count spoke largely and scripturally upon it to this effect:

• 1. Justification is, the forgiveness of sins.
• 2. The moment a man flies to Christ he is justi­fied:
• 3. And has peace with God, but not always joy:
• 4. Nor perhaps may he know he is justified, till long after.
• 5. For the assurance of it is distinct from justification itself.
• 6. But others may know he is justified by his pow­er over sin, by his seriousness, his love of the brethren, and his hunger and thirst after righteousness, which alone prove the spiritual life to be begun.
• 7. To be justified is the same thing as to be born of God. (Not so.)
• 8. When a man is awakened, he is begotten of God, and his fear and sorrow and sense of the wrath of God, are the pangs of the new birth.

[Page 146] I then recollected what Peter Bohler had often said upon this head, which was to this effect:

• 1. When a man has living faith in Christ, then is he justified:
• 2. This is always given in a moment,
• 3. And in that moment he has peace with God;
• 4. Which he cannot have, without knowing that he has it:
• 5. And being born of God, he sinneth not:
• 6. Which deliverance from sin he cannot have with­out knowing that he has it.

Sat. 15. Was the intercession day, when many strangers were present from different parts. On Mon­day 17, having stayed here ten days longer than I in­tended (my first design being only to rest one or two days) I proposed setting out for Hernhuth; but Mr. Ingham desiring me to stay a little longer, I stayed till Wednesday 19, when Mr. Hauptman (a native of Dresden) Mr. Brown and I set out together.

We breakfasted at Gehlenhausen, an old, unhand­some town, dined at Offenau (where is a strange in­stance of moderation, a church used every Sunday, both by the Papists and the Lutherans alternately) and notwithstanding some sharp showers of rain, in the evening reached Steinau. Thursday 20 we dined at Braunsal, and passing through Fulda in the after­noon (where the Duke has a pleasant palace) travelled through a delightful country of hills and vales, and in the evening came to Rickhersch. The next night (after having had the most beautiful prospect which I think I ever saw, from the top of a high hill, commanding a vast extent of various land on every side) we, with some difficulty, and many words, pro­cured a poor accommodation at an inn in Marksul. Saturday 22, having passed through Elsenach in the morning, we came through a more level open country, to Saxe-Gotha in the afternoon, a [...] and pleasant [Page 147]city, in which the Prince's palace is indeed a fine building. We stopped an hour here with a friendly man, and in the evening came to Ditleben; and thence in the morning to Erfurt, where we were kindly en­tertained by Mr. Reinhurt, to whom we were directed by some of the brethren at Marienborn. In the af­ternoon we came to Weymar, where we had more difficulty to get through the city than is usual, even in Germany: being not only detained a considerable time at the gate, but also carried before I know not what great man (I believe, the Duke) in the square: who after many other questions, asked, What we were going so far as Hernhuth for? I answered, "To see the place where the Christians live." He looked hard, and let us go.

Mond. 24. We came early to Jena, which lies at the bottom of several high, steep, barren hills. The students here are distinguished from the townsmen by their swords. They do not live together in colleges (nor indeed in any of the German universities) as we do in Oxford and Cambridge; but are scattered up and down the town; in lodging or boarding-houses. Those of them to whom we were recommended, be­haved as brethren indeed. O may brotherly kind­ness, and every good word and work, abound in them more and more!

At Jena the stone pillars begin, set up by the Elector of Saxony, and marking out every quarter of a German mile, to the end of his Electorate. Every mile is a large pillar, with the names of the neigh­bouring towns, and their distances inscribed. It were much to be wished, that the same care were taken in England, and indeed in all countries.

We left Jena early on Tuesday, reached Weisen­feltz in the evening, and Mer [...]eberg on Wednesday morning. Having a desire to see Halle (two Ger­man miles off) we set out after breakfast, and came [Page 148]thither at two in the afternoon. But we could not be admitted into the town, when we came. The King of Prussia's tall men, who kept the gates, sent us backward and forward, from one gate to another, for near two hours. I then thought of sending in a note to professor Francke, the son of that August Herman Francke, whose name, is indeed as precious ointment. O may I follow him, as he did Christ! And by manifesta­tion of the truth, commend myself to every man's conscience in the sight of God!

He was not in town. However we were at length admitted into the orphan-house, that amazing proof, that all things are still possible to him that believeth. There is now a large yearly revenue for its support, beside what is continually brought in by the Printing office, the books sold there, and the apothecary's shop, which is furnished with all sorts of medicines. The building reaches backward from the front is two wings, for, I believe, a hundred and fifty yards. The lodging-chambers for the children, their dining room, their chapel, and all the adjoining apartments, are so conveniently contrived, and so exactly clean, as I have never seen any before. Six hundred and fifty children (we were informed) are wholly maintained there, and three thousand (if I mistake not) taught. Surely such a thing neither we nor our fathers have known, as this great thing which God has done here!

Thursday 27. We returned to Merseberg, and at five in the evening came to the gates of Leipsig. After we had sent in our pass, and waited an hour and an half, we were suffered to go to a bad inn in the town.

Friday 28. We found out Mr. Merschall, and the other gentlemen of the university, to whom we were directed. They were not wanting in any good office while we stayed, and in the afternoon went with us an hour forward in our journey.

[Page 149] After a pleasant walk on Saturday, on Sunday 30, about seven in the morning, we came to Meissen. In Meissen-Castle, the German china-ware is made, which is full as dear as that imported from the Indies; and as finely shaped, and beautifully coloured, as any I have ever seen. After breakfast we went to church. I was greatly surprized at all I saw there: at the costliness of apparel in many, and the gaudiness of it in more; at the huge fur caps worn by the women, of the same shope with a Turkish turban; which generally had one or more ribbands hanging down a great length behind. The minister's habit was adorn­ed with gold and scarlet, and a vast cross both be­hind and before. Most of the congregation sat (the men generally with their hats on, at the prayers as well as sermon) and all of them stayed, during the holy communion, tho' but very few received. Alas, alas! what a reformed country is this!

At two in the afternoon we came to Dresden, the chief city of Saxony. Here also we were carried for above two hours from one magistrate or officer to another, with the usual impertinent solemnity, be­fore we were suffered to go to our inn. I greatly wonder that common sense and common humanity (for these doubtless subsist in Germany as well as England) do not put an end to this senseless, in­human usage of strangers, which we met with at al­most every German city, tho' more particularly at Frankfort, Weymar, Halle, Leipsig and Dresden. I know nothing that can reasonably be said in its de­fence, in a time of full peace, being a breach of all the common, even heathen laws of hospitality. If it is a custom, so much the worse; the more is the pity and the shame.

In the evening we saw the palace the late elector was building, when God called him away. The stone-work he had very near finished, and some of the [Page 150]apartments within. It is a beautiful and magnificent design; but all is now swiftly running to ruin. The new church on the outside resembles a theatre. It is eight square, built of fine free-stone. We were de­sired also to take notice of the great bridge which joins the new with the old town; of the large, brass crucifix upon it, generally admired for the workman­ship; and of the late king Augustus's statue on horse­back, which is at a small distance from it. Alas! Where will all these things appear, when the earth and the works thereof shall be burnt up?

Between five and six the next evening (having left Mr. Hauptman with his relations in Dresden) we came to Neustadt, but could not procure any lodging in the city. After walking half an hour, we came to another little town, and found a sort of an inn there: but they told us plainly, we should have no lodging with them; for they did not like our looks.

About eight we were received at a little house in another village, where God gave us sweet rest.

Tuesday, August 1, At three in the afternoon, I came to Hernhuth, about thirty English miles from Dresden. It lies in Upper-Lusatia, on the borders of Bohemia, and contains about an hundred houses, built on a rising ground, with evergreen woods on two sides, gardens and corn-fields on the others, and high hills at a small distance. It has one long street, through which the great road from Zittan to Lobau goes. Fronting the middle of this street is the or­phan-house; in the lower part of which is the apothe­cary's shop, in the upper, the chapel, capable of con­taining six or seven hundred people. Another row of houses runs at a small distance from either end of the orphan-house, which accordingly divides the rest of the town (beside the long street) into two squares. At the cast end of it is the Count's house, a small, plain building like the rest: having a large garden behind [Page 151]it, well laid out, not for show, but for the use of the community.

We had a convenient lodging assigned us in the house appointed for strangers: and I had now abund­ant opportunity, of observing whether what I had heard was enlarged by the relators, or was neither more nor less than the naked truth.

I rejoiced to find Mr. Hermsdorf here, whom I had so often conversed with in Georgia. And there was nothing in his power which he did not do, to make our stay here useful and agreeable. About eight we went to the public service, at which they frequently use other instruments with their organ. They began (as usual) with singing. Then follow­ed the expounding, closed by a second hymn: prayer followed this; and then a few verses of a third hymn; which concluded the service.

Wednesday 2. At four in the afternoon was a love-feast of the married men, taking their food with gladness and singleness of heart, and with the voice of praise and thanksgiving.

Thursday 3. (and so every day at eleven) I was at the bible conference, wherein Mr. Miller (late master of a great school in Zittau, till he left all to follow Christ) and several others, read together, as usual, a portion of scripture in the original. At five was the conference for strangers, when several questions concerning justification were resolved. This evening Christian David came hither. O may God make him a messenger of glad tidings.

On Friday and Saturday (and so every day in the following week) I had much conversation with the most experienced of the brethren, concerning the great work which God had wrought in their souls, purify­ing them by faith: and with Martin Dober, and the other teachers and elders of the church, concerning the discipline used therein.

[Page 152] Sund. 6. We went to church at Bertholdsdorf, a Lutheran village about an English mile from Hern­huth. Two large candles stood lighted upon the al­tar: the last supper was painted behind it; the pul­pit was placed over it, and over that, a brass image of Christ on the cross.

The minister had on a sort of pudding-sleeve gown, which covered him all round. At nine began a long voluntary on the organ, closed with a hymn, which was sung by all the people sitting (in which posture, as is the German custom, they sung all that followed.) Then the minister walked up to the altar, bowed; sung these latin words, Gloria in excelsis Deo; bowed again and went away. This was followed by another hymn, sung as before, to the organ by all the people. Then the minister went to the altar again, bowed, sung a prayer, read the epistle and went away. Af­ter a third hymn was sung, he went a third time to the altar, sung a versicle (to which all the people sung a response) read the third chapter to the Ro­mans, and went away. The people having then sung the creed in rhyme, he came and read the gospel, all standing. Another hymn followed, which being end­ed, the minister in the pulpit used a long extemporary prayer, and afterwards preached an hour and a quar­ter on a verse of the gospel. Then he read a long in­ [...]rcession and general thanksgiving, which before twelve concluded the service.

After the evening service at Hernhuth was ended, all the unmarried men (as is their custom) walked quite round the town, singing praise with instruments of music; and then on a small hill, at a little distance from it, casting themselves into a ring, joined in prayer. Thence they returned into the great square, and a little after eleven, commended each other to God.

[Page 153] Tuesday 8. A child was buried. The burying ground (called by them Gottes Acker, i. e. God's ground) lies a few hundred yards out of the town, under the side of a little wood. There are distinct squares in it for married men and unmarried; for married and unmarried women; for male and female children, and for widows. The corpse was carried from the chapel, the children walking first: next the Orphan-father (so they call him who has the chief care of the Orphan-house) with the minister of Ber­tholdsdorf: then four children bearing the corpse, and after them, Martin Dober and the father of the child. Then followed the men, and last of all the women and girls. They all sung as they went. Be­ing come into the square where the male-children are buried, the men stood on two sides of it, the boys on the third, and the women and girls on the fourth. There they sung again: after which the minister used (I think read) a short prayer, and concluded with that blessing, "Unto God's gracious mercy and protec­tion I commit you."

Seeing the father (a plain man, a taylor by trade) looking at the grave, I asked, "How do you find yourself?" He said, "Praised be the Lord, never better. He has taken the soul of my child to himself. I have seen, according to my desire, his body com­mitted to holy ground. And I know that when it is raised again, both he and I shall ever be with the Lord."

Several evenings this week I was with one or other of the private bands. On Wednesday and Thursday I had an opportunity of talking with Michael Linner, the eldest of the church, and largely with Christian David, who, under God, was the first planter of it.

Four times also I enjoyed the blessing of hearing him preach, during the few days I spent here: and every time he chose the very subject which I should [Page 154]have desired, had I spoken to him before. Thrice he described the state of those who are weak in saith, who are justified, but have not yet a new, clean heart; who have received forgiveness through the blood of Christ, but have not received the constant indwelling of the Holy Ghost. This state he explained once, from, Blessed are the poor in spirit; for theirs is the kingdom of heaven; when he shewed at large from va­rious scriptures, that many are children of God and heirs of the promises, long before their hearts are softened by holy mourning, before they are comforted by the abiding witness of the Spirit, melting their souls into all gentleness and meekness; and much more, before they are renewed in all that righteousness, which they hungered and thirsted after, before they are sure in heart from all self-will and sin, and merciful as their Father which is in heaven is merciful.

A second time he pointed out this state from those words, Who shall deliver me from the body of this death! I thank God, Jesus Christ our Lord. There is there­fore no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus. Hence also he at large both proved the existence, and shewed the nature of that intermediate state, which most experience between that bondage which is de­scribed in the 7th chapter of the epistle to the Ro­mans, and the full glorious liberty of the children of God, described in the eighth and in many oth [...] parts of scripture.

This he yet again explained from the scriptures which describe the state the apostles were in, from our Lord's death (and indeed for some time before) till the descent of the Holy Ghost at the day of Pentecost. They were then clean as Christ himself had borne them witness, by the word which he had spoken unto them. They then had faith, otherwise he could not have prayed for them, that their faith might [Page 155] not fail. Yet they had not in the full sense new hearts; neither had they received the gift of the Holy Ghost.

The fourth sermon which he preached, concerning the ground of faith, made such an impression upon me, that when I went home, I could not but write down the substance of it, which was as follows:

"The word of reconciliation which the apostles preached, as the foundation of all they taught was, that we are reconciled to God, not by our own works, nor by our own righteousness, but wholly and solely by the blood of Christ.

"But you will say, must I not grieve and mourn for my sins? Must I not humble myself before God? Is not this just and right? And must I not do this before I can expect God to be reconciled to me? I answer, it is just and right. You must be humbled before God. You must have a broken and contrite heart. But then, observe, this is not your own work. Do you grieve that you are a sinner? This is the work of the Holy Ghost. Are you contrite? Are you humbled before God? Do you indeed mourn, and is your heart broken within you? All this work­eth the self-same spirit.

"Observe again, this is not the foundation. It is not this by which you are justified. This is not the righteousness, this is no part of the righteousness by which you are reconciled unto God. You grieve for your sins. You are deeply humble. Your heart is broken. Well▪ but all this is nothing to your justifi­cation. The remission of your sins is not owing to this cause, either in whole or in part. Your humilia­tion and contrition have no influence on that. Nay, observe farther, that it may hinder your justification, that is, if you build any thing upon it; if you think, I must be so or so contrite. I must grieve more, be­fore I can be justified. Understand this well. To think you must be more contrite, more humble, more grieved, more sensible of the weight of sin, before [Page 156]you can be justified; is, to lay your contrition, your grief, your humiliation for the foundation of your being justified; at least for a part of the foundation. Therefore it hinders your justification; and a hinder­ance it is which must be removed, before you can lay the right foundation. The right foundation is, not your contrition (though that is not your own) not your righteousness, nothing of your own: nothing that is wrought in you by the Holy Ghost: but it is something without you, viz. The righteousness and the blood of Christ.

"For this is the word, To him that believeth on God that justifieth the ungodly, his faith is founted for righteous­ness. See ye not, that the foundation is nothing in us? There is no connexion between God and the un­godly. There is no tie to unite them. They are altogether separate from each other. They have no­thing in common. There is nothing less or more in the ungodly, to join them to God. Works, righte­ousness, contrition? No, Ungodliness only. This then do, if you will lay a right foundation. Go straight to Christ with all your ungodliness. Tell him, thou whose eyes are as a flame of fire searching my heart, seest that I am ungodly. I plead nothing else. I do not say, I am humble or contrite; but I am ungodly. Therefore bring me to him that justifi­eth the ungodly. Let thy blood be the propitia­tion for me. For there is nothing in me but ungod­liness.

"Here is a mystery. Here the wise men of the world are lost, are taken in their own craftiness. This the learned of the world cannot comprehend. It is foolishness unto them: sin is the only thing which divides men from God. Sin (let him that heareth understand) is the only thing which unites them to God, i. e. the only thing which moves the Lamb of [Page 157]God to have compassion upon, and by his blood t [...] give them access to the Father.

"This is the word of reconciliation which we preach. This is the foundation which never can be moved. By faith we are built upon this foundation; and this faith also is the gift of God. It is his free gift, which he now and ever giveth to every one that is willing to receive it. And when they have received this gift of God, then their hearts will melt for sor­row that they have offended him. But this gift of God lives in the heart, not in the head. The faith of the head, learned from men or books, is nothing worth. It brings neither remission of sins, nor peace with God. Labour then to believe with your whole heart. So shall you have redemption through the blood of Christ. So shall you be cleansed from all sin. So shall ye go on from strength to strength, be­ing renewed day by day in righteousness, and all true holiness."

Satur. 12. Was the intercession day, when many strangers were present, some of whom came twenty or thirty miles. I would gladly have spent my life here: but my Master calling me to labour in another part of his vineyard, on Monday 14, I was constrain­ed to take my leave of this happy place; Martin Dober, and a few others of the brethren, walking with us about an hour. O when shall THIS christi­anity cover the earth, as the waters cover the sea!

To hear in what manner God out of darkness com­manded this light to shine, must be agreeable to all those in every nation, who can testify from their own ex­perience, The gracious Lord hath so done his marvel­lous acts, that they ought to be had in remembrance. I shall therefore [...]e subjoin the substance of several conversations, which I had at Hernhuth, chiefly on this subject. And may many be incited hereby to [Page 158]give praise unto him that sitteth upon the throne, and un­to the Lamb for ever!

It was on August 10 (old stile) that I had an op­portunity of spending some hours with Christian Da­vid. He is a carpenter by trade, more than middle aged, though I believe not fifty yet. Most of his words I understood well; if at any time I did not, one of the brethren who went with me, explained them in Latin. The substance of what he spoke, I immediately after wrote down; which was as follows:

"When I was young, I was much troubled at hearing some affirm that the Pope was Antichrist. I read the Lutheran books writ against the Papists, and the Popish books writ against the Lutherans. I easi­ly saw that the Papists were in the wrong; but not that the Lutherans were in the right. I could not understand what they meant by being justified by faith, by faith alone, by faith without works. Neither did I like their talking so much of Christ. Then I be­gan to think, How can Christ be the Son of God? But the more I reasoned with myself upon it, the more confused I was, till at last I loathed the very name of Christ. I could not bear to mention it. I hated the sound of it; and would never willingly have either read or heard it. In this temper I left Moravia, and wandered through many countries, seek­ing rest but finding none.

In these wandering; I fell among some Jews. Their objections against the new testament, threw me into fresh doubts. At last I set myself to read over the old testament, and see if the prophecies therein con­tained were fulfilled. I was soon convinced they were. And thus much I gained, a fixed belief that Jesus was the Christ.

But soon after this, a new doubt arose, Are the new testament prophecies fulfilled! This I next set myself to examine. I read them carefully over, and [Page 159]could not but see every event answered the prediction: so that the more I compared the one with the other, the more fully I was convinced that All scripture was given by inspiration of God.

Yet still my soul was not in peace: nor indeed did I expect it, till I should have openly renounced the errors of Popery: which accordingly I did at Berlin. I now also led a very strict life. I read much, and prayed much. I did all I could to conquer sin; yet it profited not; I was still conquered by it. Neither found I any more rest among the Lutherans, than I did before among the Papists.

At length, not knowing what to do, I listed my­self a soldier. Now I thought I should have more time to pray and read, having with me a new testa­ment and a hymn-book. But in one day both my books were stole. This almost broke my heart. Find­ing also in this way of life all the inconveniencies which I thought to avoid by it, after six months I returned to my trade, and followed it two years. Removing then to Gorlitz in Saxony, I fell into a dangerous illness. I could not stir hand nor foot for twenty weeks. Pastor Sleder came to me every day. And from him it was, that the gospel of Christ came first with power to my soul.

Here I found the peace I had long sought in vain; for I was assured my sins were forgiven. Not indeed all at once, but by degrees; not in one moment, nor in one hour. For I could not immediately believe, that I was forgiven, because of the mistake I was then in concerning forgiveness. I saw not then, that the first promise to the children of God is, Sin shall no more reign over you; but thought, I was to feel it in me no more, from the time it was forgiven. There­fore, although I had the mastery over it, yet I often feared it was not forgiven, because it still stirred in me, and at some times thrust sore at me, that I might fall: [Page 160]because though it did not reign, it did remain in me; and I was continually tempted, though not overcome, This at that time threw me into many doubts: not un­derstanding that the devil tempts, properly speaking, only those whom he perceives to be escaping from him. He need not tempt his own: for they lie in the wick­ed one (as St. John observes) and do his will with greediness. But those whom Christ is setting free, he tempts day and night, to see if he can recover them to his kingdom. Neither saw I then, that the being justified, is widely different from the having the full assurance of faith. I remembered not, that our Lord told his apostles before his death, Ye are clean; where­as it was not till many days after it, that they were fully assured by the Holy Ghost then received, of their reconciliation to God, through his blood. The dif­ference between these fruits of the Spirit was as yet hid from me; so that I was hardly and slowly con­vinced I had the one, because I had not the other.

When I was recovered from my illness, I resolved to return into Moravia, and preach Christ to my rela­tions there Thence I came back to Gorlitz, when I continued five years, and there was a great awak­ening both in the town and country round about. In this space I made two more journies into Moravia, where more and more came to hear me, many of whom promised to come to me, wherever I was, when a door should be opened for them.

After my return from my third journey, Count Zinzendorf sent to Gorlitz, the minister of Bertholds­dorf being dead, for Mr. Rothe who was in a gentle­man's family there, to be minister of that place. Mr. Rothe told him of me, and he writ to me to come to him, and when I came, said, ‘Let as many as will of your friends come hither; I will give them land to build on, and Christ will give them the rest.’ I went immediately into Moravia and told them, God [Page 161]had now found out a place for us. Ten of them fol­lowed me then; ten more the next year; one more in my following journey. The Papists were now alarm­ed, set a price upon my head, and levelled the house I had lodged in, even with the ground. I made howe­ver eleven journies thither in all, and conducted as ma­ny as desired it to this place, the way to which was now so well known that many came of themselves.

Eighteen years ago we built the first house. We chose to be near the great road rather than at Bert­holdsdorf (for the Count gave us our choice) hoping we might thereby find opportunities of instructing some that travelled by us. In two years we were in­creased to a hundred and fifty; when I contracted an intimate acquaintance with a Calvinist, who after some time brought me over to his opinion touching election and reprobation: and by me were most of our brethren likewise brought over to the same opinions. About this time we were in great straits, wherewith many were much dejected. I endeavoured to comfort them with the sense of God's love towards them. But they answered, ‘Nay, it may be he hath no love to­wards us; it may be we are not of the election: but God hated us from eternity, and therefore he has suffered all these things to come upon us.’ The Count observing this, desired me to go to a neigh­bouring minister, pastor Steinm [...]tz, and talk with him, fully on that head, "Whether Christ died for all?" I did so, and by him God fully convinced me of that important truth. And not long after, the Count de­fired we might all meet together, and consider these things throughly. We met accordingly at his house, and parted not for three days. We opened the scrip­tures, and considered the account which is given there­in, of the whole oeconomy of God with man, from the creation to the consummation of all things, and by the blessing of God we came all to one mind; par­ticularly [Page 162]in that fundamental point, that He willeth all men to be saved, and to come to the knowledge of his truth.

Sometime after, the Jesuits told the Emperor, that the Count was gathering together all the Moravians and Bohemians, forming them into one body, and making a new religion. Commissioners were immedi­ately sent to Hernhuth, to examine the truth of this. The substance of the final answer returned through them to the Emperor was as follows.

In 1732 we were again required to give an account of ourselves. This was then done, in the manner following.

"In the mean time we found a great remissness of behaviour had crept in among us. And indeed the same was to be found in most of those round about us, whether Lutherans or Calvinists, so insisting on faith, as to forget at least in practice, both holiness and good works.

Observing this terrible abuse of preaching Christ given for us, we began to insist more than ever, on Christ living in us. All our exhortation and preach­ing turned on this; we spoke, we writ, of nothing else. Our constant inquiries were, "Is Christ formed in you? Have you a new heart? Is your soul renewed in the image of God? Is the whole body of sin de­stroyed in you? Are you fully assured, beyond all doubt or fear, that you are a child of God? In what manner, and at what moment did you receive that full assurance?" If a man could not answer all these ques­tions, [Page 166]we judged he had no true faith. Nor would we permit any to receive the Lord's supper among us, till he could.

In this persuasion we were, when I went to Groen­land, five years ago. There I had a correspondence by letter with a Danish minister, on the head of justification. And it pleased God to shew me by him (though he was by no means a holy man, but openly guilty of gross sins) that we had now leaned too much to this hand, and were run into another extreme: that Christ in us and Christ for us, ought indeed to be both insisted on; but first and principally Christ for us, as being the ground of all. I now clearly saw, we ought not to insist on any thing we feel, any more than any thing we do, as if it were necessary previ­ous to justification, or the remission of sins. I saw, that least of all ought we so to insist on the full as­surance of faith, or the destruction of the body of sin, and the extinction of all its motions, as to ex­clude those who had not attained this from the Lord's table, or to deny that they had any faith at all. I plainly perceived, this full assurance was a distinct gift from justifying faith, and often not given till long after it: and that justification does not imply, that fin should not stir in us, but only that it should not conquer.

And now first it was, that I had that full assurance of my own reconciliation to God, through Christ. For many years I had had the forgiveness of my sins, and a measure of the peace of God; but I had not till now, that witness of his Spirit, which shuts out all doubt and fear. In all my trials I had always a confidence in Christ, who had done so great things for me. But it was a confidence mixed with fear: I was afraid, I had not done enough. There was al­ways something dark in my soul till now. But now the clear light shined: and I saw that what I had hitherto so constantly insisted on, the doing so much and feeling so [Page 167]much, the long repentance and preparation for be­lieving, the bitter sorrow for sin, and that deep con­trition of heart which is found in some, where by no means essential to justification. Yea, that wherever the free grace of God is rightly preached, a sinner in the full career of his sins, will probably receive it, and be justified by it, before one who insists on such previous preparation.

After my return to Hernhuth, I found it difficult at first, to make my brethren sensible of this, or to persuade them not to insist on the assurance of faith, as a necessary qualification for receiving the Lord's supper. But from the time they were convinced, which is now three years since, we have all chiefly insisted on Christ given for us; ^* This we urge as the principal thing, which if we rightly believe, Christ will surely be formed in us. And this preaching we have always found to be accompanied with power, and to have the blessing of God following it. By this, believers receive a steady purpose of heart, and a more unshaken resolution, to endure with a free and cheerful spirit whatsoever our Lord is pleased [...] [...]ay upon them."

The same day I was with Michael Linner, the eldest of the church; the sum of whose conversation was this:

"The church of Moravia was once a glorious church. But it is now covered with thick darkness. It is about sixteen years ago, that I began to seek for light. I had a New Testament which I constant­ly read; upon which I often said to myself, "This says, I ought to be humble, and meek, and pure in heart. How comes it that I am not so?" I went to the best men I knew, and asked, "Is not this the word of God? And if so, ought I not to be such as this requires, both in heart and life?" They answered, [Page 168]"The first Christians were such; but it was impossi­ble for us to be so perfect." This answer gave me [...] satisfaction. I knew God could not mock his [...]eatures, by requiring of them what he saw it was impossible for them to perform. I asked others, but had still the same answer, which troubled me more and more.

About fourteen years ago, I was more than ever convinced, that I was wholly different from what God required me to be. I consulted his word again and again; but it spoke nothing but condemnation; [...]ill at last I could not read, nor indeed do any thing [...], having no hope and no spirit lest in me. I had [...]een in this state for several days, when being musing by myself, these words came strongly into my mind, "God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, to the end that all who believe in him, should not [...]erish but have everlasting life." I thought, " All? Then I am one. Then he is given for me. But I am a sinner. And he came to save sinners." Im­mediately my burden dropped off, and my heart was at rest.

But the full assurance of faith I had not yet; nor for the two years I continued in Moratia. When I was driven out thence by the Jesuits, I retired hither, and was soon after received into the church. And here after some time it pleased our Lord to manifest himself more clearly to my soul, and give me that full sense of acceptance in him, which excludes all doubt and fear.

Indeed the leading of the spirit is different in dif­ferent souls. His more usual method, I believe is, to give in one and the same moment the forgivness of [...], and a full assurance of that forgiveness. Yet in many he works as he did in me: giving first the re­mission of sins, and after some weeks or months [...] the full assurance of it."

[Page 169] This great truth was farther confirmed to me the next day by the conversation I had with David Nitsch­man, one of the teachers or pastors of the church [...] who expressed himself to this effect:

"In my childhood I was very serious; but as I grew up, was so careless, that at eighteen years old, I had even forgot to read. When I found this, I was startled. I soon learned again, and then spent much time in reading and prayer. But I knew no­thing of my heart, till about the age of twenty-six, I bought a bible, and began to read the New Testa­ment. The farther I read, the more I was condemn­ed. I found a law which I did not, could not keep. I had a will to avoid all sin: but the power I had not. I continually strove; but was continually con­quered. The thing which I would I did not; but what I would not have done, that I did. In this bondage I was, when I fell into a sit of sickness; during my recovery from which I felt a stronger de­sire than ever, to avoid all sin. At the same time I felt the power. And sin no longer reigned over me.

But soon after I fell into grievous temptations; which made me very uneasy. For though I yielded not to them, yet they returned again, and again, as fast as they were conquered. Then it came into my mind, "I take all this pains to serve God. What if there be no God? How do I know there is?" And on this I mused more and more, till I said in my heart, "There is no God!"

In this state I was when I came to Hernhuth, about fourteen years ago. And every day for a full year, from morning to night, I groaned under this un­belief. Yet I prayed continually, unbelieving as I was; particularly one Sunday, when being in the church of Bertholdsdorf, and quite weary of hearing [...] much of him, whose very being I did not believe, [Page 170]I vehemently said, "O God, If thou be a God, thou must manifest thyself, or I cannot believe it." In walking home, I thought of an expression of Pastor Rothe's, "Only suppose these things are so: suppose there be a God." I said to myself, "Well, I with I do suppose it." Immediately I felt a strange sweet­ness in my soul, which increased every moment till the next morning: and from that time, if all the men upon earth, and all the devils in hell had joined in denying it, I could not have doubted the being of God, no, not for one moment. This first sweetness lasted for six weeks, without any intermission.

I then fell into doubts of another kind. I believed in God; but not in Christ. I opened my heart to Martin Dober, who used many arguments with me, but in vain. For above four years I found no rest, by reason of this unbelief, till one day, as I was sitting in my house despairing of any relief, those words shot into me, "God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself." I thought, "Then God and Christ are one." Immediately my heart was filled with joy; and much more at the remembrance of these words which I now felt I did believe. "The word was with God, and the word was God. And the word was made flesh, and dwelt among us."

Yet in a few days I was troubled again. I believed Christ was the Saviour of the world. But I could not call him my Saviour, neither did I believe, he would save me. And one day, as I was walking across the square, that text came strongly into my mind, "The unbelieving shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone." I return­ed home, terrified beyond expression, and instantly began crying out to our Saviour, telling him, "I deserved no less than hell, and gave myself up, if it were his will, to suffer what I had deserved." In a [Page 171]moment I found a gleam of hope, that he would have mercy even on me.

But this in a short time vanished away, and my un­easiness returned again. Many endeavoured to per­suade me that I had, but I knew I had not, a right faith in Christ. For I had no confidence in him; nor could I lay hold upon him as my Saviour. Indeed reading one day (in Arndt's True Christianity) "That if all the sins of all the men upon earth were joined in one man, the blood of Christ was sufficient to cleanse that man from all sin:" I felt for a time comfort and peace: but it was but for a time, and then I was over­whelmed as before with sadness and unbelief. And I was oppressed almost beyond my strength, when ^* a year ago I went into this little wood. At first I was tempted to break out into impatience; but then I thought, our Saviour knows best; nor would he suf­fer this trouble to continue so long, if he did not see it was good for me. I delivered myself wholly into his hands, to dispose of me according to his good pleasure. In th [...] [...] [...]our I saw, that all who believe in him are reconciled to God through his blood, and was assured, that I was thereby reconciled, and numbered among the children of God. And from that hour, I have had no doubt or fear, but all peace and joy in believing."

Some of the circumstances of this uncommon rela­tion, were made more clear to me, by the account I [Page 172]received in the afternoon from a student at Hernl [...]uth, Albinus Theodorus Feder.

"I (said he) for three years sought against sin with all my might, by fasting and prayer and all the other means of grace. But notwithstanding all my endea­vours, I gained no ground; sin still prevailed over me; till at last, not knowing what to do farther, I was on the very brink of despair. Then it was that having no other refuge left, I fled to my Saviour as one lost and undone, and that had no hope but in his power and free mercy. In that moment I found my heart at rest, in good hope that my sins were forgiven; of which, I had a stronger assurance six weeks after, when I received the Lord's supper here. But I dare not affirm, I am a child of God; neither have I the seal of the Spirit. Yet I go on quietly doing my Sa­viour's will, taking shelter in his wounds, from all trouble and sin, and knowing he will perfect his work in his own time."

Martin Dober, when I described my state to him, said, "He had known very many believers, who if asked the question, would not have dared to affirm, that they were the children of God. And he added, It is very common for persons to receive remission of sins, or justification through faith in the blood of Christ, before they receive the full assurance of faith, which God many times with-holds, till be has tried whether they will work together with him, in the use of the first gift. Nor is there any need (continued he, Dober) to incite any one to seek that assurance by telling him, the faith he has is nothing. This will be more likely to drive him to despair, than to encou­rage him to press forward. His single business, who has received the first gift is, credendo credere & in cre­dendo perseverare (to believe on, and to hold fast that whereunto he hath obtained). To go on, doing his [Page 173]Lord's will, according to the ability God hath alrea­dy given; chearfully and faithfully to use what he has received, without solicitude for the rest."

In the conversation I afterwards had with Augus­tine Neusser, a knife-smith (another of the pastors or teachers of the church, about sixty years of age) as also with his brothers, Wensel, and Hantz Neusser, the nature of true faith and salvation was yet far­ther explained to me.

Augustine Neusser spoke to this effect:

"By experience I know, that we cannot be justifi­ed through the blood of Christ, till we feel that all our righteousness and good works avail nothing to­wards our justification. Therefore what men call a good life, is frequently the greatest of all hinderances to their coming to Christ. For it will not let them see, that they are lost, undone sinners, and if they see not this, they cannot come unto him.

Thus it was with me. I had led a good life from a child. And this was the great hinderance to my coming to Christ. For, abounding in good works, and diligently using all the means of grace, I persuad­ed myself for thirteen or fourteen years, that all was well, and I could not fail of salvation. And yet, I cannot say my soul was at rest, even till the time when God shewed me clearly, that my heart was as corrupt, notwithstanding all my good works, as that of an adulterer or murderer. Then my self-depend­ence withered away. I wanted a Saviour, and fled naked to him. And in him I found true rest to my soul, being fully assured that all my sins were forgiv­en. Yet I cannot tell the hour or day, when I first received that full assurance. For it was not given me at first, neither at once; but grew up in me by de­grees. [Page 174]But from the time it was confirmed in me, I never lost it; having never since doubted, no, not for a moment."

What Wensel Neusser said was as follows:

"From a child I had many fits of seriousness, and was often uneasy at my sins: this uneasiness was much increased fifteen years since, by the preaching of Christian David. I thought the way to get ease was, to go and live among the Lutherans, whom I supposed to be all good Christians. But I soon found they, as well as the Papists, were carnal, world­ly-minded men. About thirteen years ago I came from among them to Hernhuth; but was still as un­easy as before: which I do not wonder at now (though I did then) for all this time, though I saw clearly, I could not be saved, but by the death of Christ, yet I did not trust in that only for salvation, but depend­ed on my own righteousness also, as the joint conditi­on of my acceptance.

After I was settled here, seeing the great diversity of sects wherewith we were surrounded, I began to doubt whether any religion was true? For half a year these doubts perplexed me greatly; and I was of­ten just on the point of casting off all religion, and returning to the world. The fear of doing this threw me into a deeper concern than ever I had been in be­fore. Nor could I find how to escape, for the more I struggled the more I was entangled. I often re­flected on my former course of life, as more desira­ble than this. And one day, in the bitterness of my soul, besought our blessed Saviour, "at least to restore me to that state, which I was in before I left Mora­via." In that moment he manifested himself to me, so that I could lay hold on him as my Saviour, and [Page 175]shewed me, it is only the blood of Christ which cleanseth us from all sin. This was ten years since, and from that hour, I have not had one doubt of my acceptance. Yet I have not any transports of joy. Nor had I when he thus revealed himself un­to me. Only I well remember, that manifestation of himself was like a cool, refreshing wind, to one that is fainting away with fultry heat. And ever since my soul has been sweetly at rest, desiring no other portion in earth or heaven."

"I was awakened (said Hantz Neusser) by my grandfather when a child, and by him carefully in­structed in the new testament. I married young, and being from that time weak and [...]ckly, was the more earnest to work out my salvation: and nineteen or twenty years ago, I had a strong confidence in our. Saviour, and was continually warning others against trusting in themselves, in their own righteousness or good works. Yet I was not free from it myself. I did not trust in him only for acceptance with God. And hence it was, that not building on the right foundation, the blood and righteousness of Christ alone, I could not gain a full victory over my sins, but sometimes conquered them, and sometimes was conquered by them. And therefore I had not a full or constant peace, though I was commonly ea­sy, and hoping for mercy.

Sixteen years ago (on Saturday next) I came to my brother Augustine at Hernhuth. There was then only one little house here. Here I continued eight years in much the same state, thinking I trusted in Christ alone; but indeed trusting partly in his and partly in my own righteousness. I was walking one day in this little wood, when God discovered my heart to me. I saw I had till that hour trusted in my own righteousness, and at the same time, that I had [Page 176]no righteousness at all, being altogether corrupt and abominable, and fit only for the fire of hell. At this sight I fell into bitter grief, and an horrible dread o­verwhelmed me, expecting nothing (as I saw I deserv­ed nothing else) but to be swallowed up in a moment. In that moment I beheld the Lamb of God, taking away my sins. And from that time I have had re­demption through his blood, and full assurance of it. I have that peace in him which never fails, and which admits of no doubt or fear. Indeed I am but a little one in Christ; therefore I can receive as yet but little of him. But from his fulness I have enough; and I praise him, and am satisfied."

In the three or four following days I had an oppor­tunity of talking with Zacharias Neusser (cousin to Hantz) David Schneider, Christopher Demuth, Ar­vid Gradin (now at Constantinople) and several others of the most experienced brethren. I believe no pre­face is needful to the account they gave of God's dealings with their souls, which I doubt not will [...]ir up many, through his grace, to glorify their Father which is in heaven.

"I was born (said Zacharias Neusser) on the bor­ders of Moravia, and was first awakened by my cou­sin Wensel, who soon after carried me to hear Mr. Steinmetz, a Lutheran minister, about thirty English miles off. I was utterly astonished. The next week I went again: after which, going to him in private, I opened my heart, and told him all my doubts, those especially concerning Popery. He offered to receive me into communion with him, which I gladly accept­ed of; and in a short time after I received the Lord's supper from his ha [...]. While I was receiving, I felt Christ had died for me. I knew I was reconciled to God. And all the day I was overwhelmed with joy: having those words continually on my mind, This day is salvation come to my house: I also am a son of Abra­ham. [Page 177]This joy I had continually for a year and a half, and my heart was full of love to Christ.

After this I had thoughts of leaving Moravia. I was convinced it would be better for my soul. Yet I would not do it, because I got more money here than I could elsewhere. When I reflected on this, I said to myself, "This is mere covetousness. But if I am covetous, I am not a child of God." Hence I fell into deep perplexity, nor could I find any way to e­scape out of it. In this slavery and misery I was for five years; at the end of which I fell sick: in my sick­ness my heart was set at liberty, and peace returned to my soul. I now prayed earnestly to God, to restore my health, that I might leave Moravia. He did re­store it, and I immediately returned to Hernhuth. After I had been here a quarter of a year, the Count preached one day, upon the nature of sanctification. I found I had not experienced what he described, and was greatly terrified. I went to my cousin Wensel, who advised me to read over the 3d, 4th and 5th chap­ters of the epistle to the Romans. I did so. I had read them an hundred times before, yet now they ap­peared quite new, and gave me such a sight of God's justifying the ungodly, as I never had before. On Sunday I went to church at Bertholdsdorf, and while we were singing those words, "Wir glauben auch in Jesum Christ," (we believe also in Jesus Christ) I clearly saw him as my Saviour. I wanted immediate­ly to be alone, and to pour out my heart before him. My soul was filled with thankfulness, and with a still, soft, quiet joy, such as it is impossible to express. I had full assurance that my Beloved was mine, and I was his, which has never ceased to this day. I see by a clear light, what is pleasing to him, and I do it con­tinually in love. I receive daily from him peace and joy; and I have nothing to do but to praise him."

[Page 178] The most material part of David Schneider's ac­count was this:

"Both my father and mother feared God, and carefully instructed me in the holy scriptures. I was from a child earnestly desirous to follow their instruc­tions, and more so after my father's death. Yet as I grew up, many sins got the dominion over me. Of which God began to give me a sense, by the preach­ing of Pastor Steinmetz; who speaking one day of drunkenness, to which I was then addicted, I was so grieved and ashamed, that for several days I could not bear to look any one in the face. It pleased God afterwards to give me, though not all at once, a [...]nse of my other both outward and inward sins. And before the time of my coming out of Moravia, I knew that my sins were forgiven. Yet I cannot six on any particular time, when I knew this first. For I did not clearly know it at once: God having always done every thing in my soul by degrees.

When I was about twenty-six I was pressed in spirit to exhort and instruct my brethren. Accord­ingly many of them met at my house to read pray, and sing psalms. They usually came about ten or eleven, and stayed till one or two in the morning. When Christian David came to us, we were much quickened and comforted, and our number greatly in­creased. We were undisturbed for two years. But then the Papists were informed of our meeting. Im­mediately search was made. All our books were seized, and we were ordered to appear before the Consistory. I was examined many times; was im­prisoned, released and imprisoned again five times in one year. At last I was adjudged to pay fifty [...]ix dollars, and suffer a year's imprisonment. But upon [...] re-hearing, the sentence was changed, and I was or­dered to be sent to the gallies. Before this sentence [Page 179]was executed, I escaped out of prison, and came to Sorau in Silesia. Many of [...] brethren followed me, and here for near ten years I taught the children in the orphan-house. I soon sem for my wife and children. But the magistrates had just then ordered that the wives and children of all those who had fled, should be taken into safe custody. The night before this order was to be executed, she escaped and came to Sorau.

Soon after, some of my brethren who had been there, pressed me much to remove to Hernhuth: Chri­stian David in particular, by whose continued impor­tunity, I was at length brought to resolve upon it. But all my brethren at Sorau were still as strongly against it, as I myself had formerly been. For a whole year I was struggling to break from them or to persuade them to go too. And it cost me more pains to get from Sorau, than it had done to leave Mo­ravia.

At length I broke loose and came to Hernhuth, which was about three years ago. Finding I could scarce subsist my family here by hard labour, whereas at Sorau all things were provided for me, I grew ve­ry uneasy. The more uneasy I was, the more my brethren refrained from my company; ^* so that in a short time I was left quite alone. Then I was in deep distress indeed. Sin revived and almost got the mastery over me. I tried all ways, but found no help. In this miserable state I was about a year ago, when the brethren cast lots concerning me, and were thereby directed to admit me to the Lord's table. And from that hour my soul received comfort, and I was more and more assured that I had an advocate with the Father, and that I was fully reconciled to God by his blood."

[Page 180] Christopher Demuth spoke to this effect:

"My father was a pious man from his youth. He carefully instructed all his children. I was about fifteen when he died. A little before he died, hav­ing been all his life-time under the law, he received at once remission of sins, and the full witness of the Spirit. He called us to him and said, "My dear children, let your whole trust be in the blood of Christ. Seek salvation in this, and in this alone, and he will shew to you the same mercy he has to me. Yea, and he will shew it to many of your relations and ac­quaintance, when his time is come."

From this time till I was twenty-seven years old I was more and more zealous in seeking Christ. I then removed into Silesia, and married. A year af­ter I was much pressed in spirit, to return and visit my brethren in Moravia. I did so. We had the New Testament, our Moravian hymns, and two or three Lutheran books. We read and sung, and prayed to­gether, and were much strengthened. One day as we were together at my house, one knocked at the door. I opened it and he was a Jesuit. He said, "My dear Demuth, I know you are a good man, and one that instructs and exhorts your friends, I must see what books you have." And going into the inner room, he found the testament, and the rest together. He took them all away; nor did we dare to hinder him. The next day we were summoned before the Consistory, and after a long examination, ordered to appear in the church before the congregation, on the following Sunday. There they read a long confessi­on of faith, and afterwards bid us say, "In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost." We did so, though not knowing what they meant. They then told us, "We had abjur­ed the Lutheran errors, and had called the blessed [Page 181]Trinity to witness, that we assented to that confessi­on of faith." My heart sunk within me when I heard [...]t. I went home, but could find no rest. I thought I had now denied my Saviour, and could expect no more mercy from him. I could not bear to stay in Moravia any longer, but immediately returned into Si­lesia. There I continued six years, but there too I was perpetually terrified with the thoughts of what I had done. I often enquired after my brethren whom I had left in Moravia. Some of them I heard were thrown into prison, and others escaped to a little vil­lage in Lusatia called Hernhuth. I wished I could go to that place myself, and at last meeting with one who had the same desire, we agreed to go together. But our design being discovered he was apprehended and thrown into prison. Expecting the same treat­ment, I earnestly prayed, "That God would shew me a token for good." Immediately my soul was filled with joy, and I was ready to go to prison or to death.

Two days passed, and no man asked me any ques­tion; when doubting, what I ought to do, I went into a neighbouring wood, and going into a little [...]ave, fell on my face and prayed, "Lord, thou seest I am ready to do what thou wilt. If it be thy will I should be cast into prison, thy will be done. If it be thy will, that I should leave my wife and chil­dren, I am ready. Only shew thy will." Immedi­ately I heard a loud voice saying, "Fort, fort, fort" (Go on, go on) I rose joyful and satisfied; went home and told my wife, "It was God's will I should now leave her; but that I hoped to return in a short time, and take her and my children with me." I went out of the door, and in that moment was filled with peace and joy and comfort.

We had above two hundred miles to go (thirty-five German) and neither I, nor my friend who went [Page 182]with me, had one Kreutzer. ^* But God provided things convenient for us, so that in all the way we wanted nothing.

In this journey God gave me the full assurance that my sins were forgiven. This was twelve years ago, and ever since, it has been confirmed more and more, by my receiving from him every day fresh supplies of strength and comfort.

By comparing my experience with that of others, you may perceive, how different ways God leads dif­ferent souls. But though a man should be led in a way different from that of all other men, yet if his eye be at all times fixed on his Saviour, if his constant aim be to do his will; if all his desires tend to him; if in all trials he can draw strength from him; if he fly to him in all troubles, and in all temptations find salva­tion in his blood; in this there can be no delusion: And whosoever is thus minded, however or when­ever it began, is surely reconciled to God through his Son."

Arvid Gradin (a Swede, born in Dalecarlia) spoke to this purpose:

"Before I was ten years old, I had a serious sense of religion, and great fervour in my prayer. This was increased by my reading much in the New Testament; but the more I read, the more earnestly I cried out, "Either these things are not true, or we are not Christians." About sixteen my sense of religion began to decline, by my too great fondness for learning, especially the oriental tongues, wherein I was instructed by a private preceptor, who like­wise did all that in him lay, to instruct me in true divinity.

At seventeen I went to the university of Upsal, and a year or two after was licensed to preach. But [Page 183]at twenty-two meeting with Arndt's True Christiani­ty, found I myself was not a Christian. Immediately I left off preaching, and betook myself wholly to philosophy. This stifled all my convictions for some years; but when I was about twenty-seven, they re­vived, and continued the year after, when I was de­sired to be domestic tutor to the children of the Se­cretary of State. I now felt I was carnal, sold under sin, and continually struggled to burst the bonds, till (being about thirty-one years old) I was unawares entangled in much worldly business. This cooled me in my pursuit of holiness; yet for a year and a half my heart was never at peace. Being then in a book­seller's shop, I saw the account of the church at Hernhuth. I did not think there could be any such place, and asked the bookseller, if that was a real ac­count? His answer, "That it was no more than the plain truth," threw me into deep thought, and fervent prayer, that God would bring me to that place. I went to the Secretary, and told him, "I did not de­sign to stay at Upsal, having a desire to travel." He said, "He had a desire his son should travel, and was glad of an opportunity to send him with me." I was grieved but knew not how to refuse any thing to my patron and benefactor. Accordingly we left Upsal together, and after a year spent in several parts of Germany, went through Holland into France, and so to Paris, where we spent another year. But I was more and more uneasy till I could be disengaged from my charge, that I might retire to Hernhuth. In our return from France, my pupil's elder brother return­ing from Italy met us at Leipsig. I immediately writ to his father, and having obtained his consent, delivered him into his hands.

April 23, 1738, (N. S.) I came hither. Here I was as in another world. I desired nothing but to be cleansed inwardly and outwardly from sin, by the [Page 184]blood of Jesus Christ. I found all here laying the same foundation. Therefore, though I did not think with them in all points of doctrine, I waved these, and singly pursued reconciliation with God through Christ.

On the 22d of May last, I could think of nothing but, He that believeth hath everlasting life. But I was afraid of deceiving myself, and continually prayed I might not build without a foundation. Yet I had a sweet, settled peace, and for five days this scripture was always in my thoughts. On the 28th those words of our Lord were as strongly impressed upon me, "If ye being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Ghost to them that ask him." At the same time I was incessantly carried out, to ask, that he would give me the witness of his Spirit. Or the 29th I had what I asked of him, viz. the [...], which is,

"Requies in sanguine Christi. Firma fiducia in Deum & persuasio de gratia divina; tranquillitas men­tis summa, atque serenitas & pa [...]; cum absentia om­nis desiderii carnalis, & cessatione peccatorum etiam internorum. Verbo, Cor quod antea instar maris turbulenti agitabatur, in summa fuit require, instar maris sereni & tranquilli."

"Repose in the blood of Christ. A firm confi­dence in God, and persuasion of his favour: seren [...] peace and stedfast tranquillity of mind, with a de­liverance from every fleshly desire, and from every outward and inward sin. In a word, my heart which before was tossed like a troubled sea, was still and quiet, and a sweet calm."

In the present discipline of the church of Hern­huth, all which is alterable at the discretion of the superiors, may be observed,

• I. The officers of it.
• [Page 185] II. The division of the people.
• III. The conferences, lectures, and government of the children.
• IV. The order of divine service.

I. The officers are, 1. The eldest of the whole church; beside whom, there is an eldest of every particular branch of it. There is also a distinct eldest over the young men, and another over the boys; a female eldest over the women in general, and another over the unmarried, and another over the girls. 2. The Teachers, who are four. 3. The Helpers (or Deacons). 4. The Overseers (or Censors) eleven in number at Hernhuth. 5. The Monitors, who are eleven likewise. 6. The Almoners, eleven also. 7. The Attenders on the sick, seven in number. Lastly, The servants, or deacons of the lowest order.

II. The people of Hernhuth are divided, 1. Into five male classes, viz. the children, the middle chil­dren, the big children, the young men, and the married. The females are divided in the same man­ner. 2. Into eleven classes, according to the houses where they live: and in each class is an helper, an overseer, a monitor, an almoner and a servant. 3. Into about ninety bands, each of which meets twice at least, but most of them three times a week, To confess their faults one to another, and pray for one another, that they may be healed.

III. The rulers of the church, i. e. The elders, teachers, helpers, have a conference every week, purely concerning the state of souls, and another concerning the institution of youth. Beside which, they have [Page 186]one every day, concerning outward things relating to the church.

The overseers, the monitors, the almoners, the at­tenders on the sick, the servants, the school-masters, the young men, and the children, have likewise each a conference once a week, relating to their several offices and duties.

Once a week also is a conference for strangers; at which any person may be present, and propose any question or doubt, which he desires to have resolved.

In Hernhuth is taught reading, writing, arithmetic, Latin, Greek, Hebrew, French, English, history and geography.

There is a Latin, French, and an English lecture every day, as well as an historical and geographical one. On Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Satur­day is the Hebrew lecture; the Greek on Tuesday and Thursday.

In the Orphan-house, the larger children rise at five (the smaller, between five and six.) After a lit­tle private prayer they work till seven. Then they are at school till eight, the hour of prayer. At nine those who are capable of it learn Latin, at ten French. At eleven they all walk. At twelve they dine to­gether, and walk till one. At one they work or learn writing; at three arithmetic; at four history; at five they work; at six sup and work; at seven, after a time spent in prayer, walk; at eight the smaller chil­dren go to bed, the larger to the public service. When this is ended, they work again, till (at ten) they go to bed.

IV. Every morning at eight is singing and exposi­tion of scripture; and commonly short prayer.

At eight in the evening, there is commonly only mental prayer, ^* joined with the singing and expound­ing.

[Page 187] The faithful afterwards spend a quarter of an hour in prayer, and conclude with the kiss of peace.

On Sunday morning the service begins at six; at nine the public service at Bertholdsdorf. At one the eldest gives separate exhortations to all the mem­bers of the church, divided into fourteen little classes for that purpose, spending about a quarter of an hour with each class. At four begins the evening service at Bertholdsdorf, closed by a conference in the church. At eight is the usual service; after which the young men, singing praises round the town, conclude the day.

On the first Saturday in the month, the Lord's supper is administered. From ten in the morning till two, the eldest speaks with each communicant in pri­vate, concerning the state of his soul. At two they dine; then wash one another's feet, after which they sing and pray. About ten they receive in silence without any ceremony, and continue in silence till they part at twelve.

On the second Saturday is the solemn prayer-day for the children: the third is the day of general in­tercession and thanksgiving: and on the fourth is the great monthly conference of all the superiors of the church.

For the satisfaction of those who desire a more full account, I have added,

JOURNAL From Aug. 12, 1738, to Nov. 1, 1739.

SATURDAY, Aug. 12. About seven in the evening we came to Neu-Kirche, a town about twenty-four miles from Hernhuth. Mr. Schneider (the minister of it who had desired us to take his house in our way) was not at home: but we found one Mr. Manoetius there, the minister of a neighbour­ing town, who walked with us in the morning ten miles to Hauswald [...], where he lived. He told us, "That the Lutherans as well as the Papists, were ir­reconcilable enemies to the brethren of Hernhuth: that the generality of the Lutheran clergy, were as bitter against them as the Jesuits themselves: that none of his neighbours durst go thither (unless by stealth) being sure of suffering for it, if discovered; that to prevent any of Hernhuth from coming to them, the Elector had forbid, under a severe penalty, any number of persons, exceeding three, to meet together on a religious account; and that he himself, for hav­ing a little society in his own parish, had been sum­moned to appear before the Consistory at Dresden." Yea, let the kings of the earth stand up, and the rulers take counsel together against the Lord and against his a­nointed! He that sitteth in heaven shall laugh them to scorn; the Lord shall have them in derision.

We left Hauswalde in the afternoon, and in the evening came to Dresden. But the officer at the gate would not suffer us to come in; so that we were [Page 202]obliged to go on to the next village: which leaving early in the morning, on Thursday in the afternoon we came to Leipsig.

We were now kept only an hour at the gate, and then conducted to Mr. Arnold's, who had invited us when we were in the town before, to make his house our home. A few we found here too, who desire to know nothing but Jesus Christ, and him cru­cified. And from them we had letters to Halle, whi­ther we came on Friday 18. But the king of Prussia's tall men (who kept the gates) would not suffer Mr. Brown to come in. Me they admitted (in honour of my profession) after I had waited about two hours: and one of them we [...]t with me to the Prince of Hesse, who after a few questions, gave me leave to lodge in the city. Thence he shewed me to Mr Gots­ch [...]lck's lodgings, to whom I had letters from Leip­sig. He read them and said, My brother, what you find here, you will use as your own. And if you want any thing else, tell us and you shall have it.

I told them, "My companion was without the gate." They soon procured admittance for him. And we were indeed as at home; for I have hard­ly seen such little children as these, even at Hern­huth.

Satur. 19. I waited on Professor Francke, who behaved with the utmost humanity; and afterwards on Professor Knappe, to whom also I am indebted for his open, friendly behaviour. Between ten and eleven, seven of the brethren set out with us, one of whom went with us two days journey. It was the dusk of the evening on Sunday 20, when, wet and weary, we reached Jena.

Mond. 21. We visited the schools there; the rise of which (as we were informed) was occasioned thus:

[Page 203] About the year 1704 Mr. Stoltius, a student at Jena, began to speak of faith in Christ; which he continued to do, till he took his master's degree, and read public lectures. About twelve or fifteen students were awakened, and joined with him in prayer and building up one another. At this (after various ca­lumnies spread abroad and divers persecutions occasi­oned thereby) the Consistory was offended, and issu­ed out a commission to examine him. In consequence of the report made to the Consistory by these commis­sioners, he was forbid to read any public lectures, or to hold any meetings with his friends. Not long af­ter an order was given, by which he was excluded from the holy communion. He was also to have been expelled the university: but this he prevented by a voluntary retirement.

Yet one of the commissioners, who had been sent by the Duke of Weymar (one of the Lords of Jena) informed the Duke, that according to his judgment Stoltius was an innocent and holy man. On this the Duke sent for him to Weymar, and fixed him in a living there. There likewise he awakened many, and met with them to pray and read the scriptures toge­ther. But it was not long that the city could bear him. For he boldly rebuked all vice, and that in all persons, neither sparing the courtiers, nor the Duke himself. Consequently, his enemies every where in­creased, and many persecutions followed. In fine, he was forbid to have any private meetings, and was to have been deposed from the ministry; when God call­ing him to himself, took him away from the evil to come.

Before Stoltius left Jena, Boddaeus also began to preach the real gospel, as did Christius soon after; whereby some awakening continued till the year 1724. A few of the townsmen then agreed, to maintain a student, to be a schoolmaster for some poor children. [Page 204]They afterwards kept several schoolmasters: But a­bout 1728, all of them going away, the school was broke up, and the children quite neglected. Profes­sor Buddaeus being informed of this, earnestly recom­mended the consideration of it to the students in his house: and about ten of them, among whom was Mr. Spangenberg, took upon themselves the care of those children. Their number soon increased, which gave great offence to the other school-masters in the town; and not long after to the magistrates of the town, and to the senate of the university. The offence soon spread to the pastors, the professors, the consistory, and the princes who are lords of Jena. But it pleas­ed God to move one of them, the prince of Eisnach, who had the chief power there, to stop the open per­secution, by forbidding either the senate or consistory to molest them. He likewise wholly exempted them from the jurisdiction of both, ordering that all com­plaints against them for the time to come should be cognizable only by himself. But during the persecu­tion, the number of schools was increased from one to three, (one in each suburb of the city) the number of teachers to above thirty, and of children to above three hundred.

There are now thirty constant teachers, ten in each school, and three or four supernumerary, to supply accidental defects. Four of the masters are appoint­ed to punish, who are affixed to no one school. Each of the schools being divided into two classes, and taught five hours a day, every one of the thirty mas­ters has one hour in a day to teach. All the masters have a conference about the schools every Monday. They have a second meeting on Thursday, chiefly for prayers. And a third every Saturday.

Once in half a year they meet to fill up the places [...] those masters who are gone away. And the num­ber [Page 205]has never decreased; fresh ones still offering them­selves, as the former leave the university.

The present method wherein they teach is this.

There are always two classes in each school. In the lower, children from six to ten or twelve years old are taught to read. They are then removed to the other [...]ass, in which are taught, the holy scriptures, arith­metic, and whatever else it may be useful for children to learn.

In the morning from eight to nine they are all ca­techized, and instructed in the first principles of Chri­stianity, either from Luther's smaller catechism, or from some texts of holy scripture.

From nine to ten the smaller children are taught their letters and syllables; and the larger read the bi­ble. From ten to eleven those in the lower class learn and repeat some select verses of holy scripture, chiefly relating to the foundation of the faith. Mean while those in the upper, learn arithmetic.

In the afternoon from one to two all the children are employed as from nine to ten in the morning. From two to three the smaller children learn and re­peat Luther's smaller catechism, while the larger are taught to write.

Every Sunday there is a public catechizing on some text of scripture; at which all persons who desire it may be present.

In the afternoon we left Jena, several of the bre­thren accompanying us out of town. At five hav­ing just passed through Weymar, we met Mr. Ing­ham going for Hernhuth. We all turned aside to a neighbouring village, where having spent a comforta­ble evening together, in the morning we commended each other to the grace of God, and went on our se­veral ways.

We breakfasted at Erfurt with Mr. Reinhart, spent the evening with some Brethren at Saxe-Gotha, and [Page 206]by long journeys came to Marienborn on Friday, Au­gust 25.

Monday 28, I took my leave of the Countess (the Count being gone to Jena) and setting out early the next morning came about three in the afternoon to Frankfort. From Mr. Bohler's we went to the soci­ety, where one of the brethren from Marienborn offer­ed free redemption through the blood of Christ to six­ty or seventy persons.

Wednesday 30. In the afternoon we came to Mentz, and agreed for our passage to Colen by wa­ter, for a florin per head: which was but half what we gave before, though (it seems) twice as much as we ought to have given.

Thursday 31. We spent half an hour in the great church, a huge heap of irregular building; full of al­tars, adorned (or loaded rather) with abundance of gold and silver. In going out, we observed a paper on the door, which was of so extraordinary a nature, that I thought it would not be labour lost to transcribe it. The words were as follow: ‘Vollkommener ablass fur die arme seelen im feg-seur.’

‘Seine pabliche heiligket, Clemens der 12te, ha­ben in diesem jahr 1738, den 7 Augusti, die psarr kirche des Sancti Christophori in Mentz gnadig­sten privilegirt, dass ein jeder priester, so wohl se­cular als regularischen stands, der am aller seelen­tag, wie auch an einem jedem tag in derselben oc­tav; so dann am zwiein vom ordinario tagen einer jeden woch das jahr hindurch, fur die seel eine christglaubigen verstorbenen an zum altar mess lesen wird, jedesmahl eine seel aus dem feg-feur erlosen konne.’

[Page 207] A full release for the poor souls in purgatory.

His papal holiness, Clement the XIIth, hath this year 1738, on the seventh of August, most graciously priviledg­ed the cathedral church of St. Christopher in Mentz, so that every priest, as well secular as regular, who will read mass at an altar for the soul of a Christian departed, on any holiday, or on any day within the octave thereof, or on two extraordinary days, to be appointed by the ordi­nary, of any week in the year, may each time deliver a soul out of the fire of purgatory.

Now I desire to know, whether any Romanist of common sense, can either defend or approve of this?

At eight we took boat, and on Saturday, Sept. 2, about eleven came to Colen; which we left at one, and between seven and eight reached a village, an hour short of Neus. Here we overtook a large num­ber of Switzers, men, women and children, singing, dancing and making merry, being all going to make their fortunes in Georgia. Looking upon them as deli­vered into my hands by God, I plainly told them, what manner of place it was. If they now leap in­to the fire with open eyes, their blood is on their own head.

Mond. 4. Before noon we came to Cleve, and to Nimwegen in the evening. The next night we lay at a little village near Tiel; which leaving early in the morning, we walked by the side of many pleasant or­chards, and in the afternoon came to Ysselstein. We stayed only one night with the brethren, (in the new house, called Herndyke, an English mile from the town) and hasting forward came the next afternoon to Dr. Koker's at Rotterdam.

I cannot but acknowledge the civility of this friend­ly man, all the time we stayed in his house. In the morning, Frid. 8, we went to the English episcopal church, which is a large, handsome, convenient build­ing. [Page 208]The minister read prayers seriously and distinct­ly, to a small, well-behaved congregation. Being informed our ship was to sail the next day (Satur­day) we took leave of our generous friend, and went to an inn close to the key, that we might be ready when called to go aboard. Having waited till past four in the afternoon, we stepped into the Jews syna­gogue, which lies near the water-side. I do not won­der that so many Jews (especially those who have any re [...]ection) utterly abjure all religon. My spirit was moved within me, at that horrid, senseless p [...] ­geantry, that mockery of God, which they called public worship. Lord, do not thou yet cast off thy people! But in Abraham's seed let them also be blessed!

The ship lingering still, I had time to exhort se­veral English, whom we met with at our inn, to pur­sue inward religion; the renewal of their souls in righteousness and true holiness. In the morning a daughter of affliction came to see me, who teaches a school at Rotterdam. She had been for some time under deep convictions; but could find none to in­struct or comfort her. After much conversation, we joined in prayer, and her spirit a little revived. Be­tween nine and ten we went on board. In the after­noon I read prayers, and preached in the great cabin. The wind being contrary, [...] did not get out of the river till Wednesday; nor to London till Saturday night.

Sunday, Sept. 17. I began again to declare in my own country the glad tidings of salvation, preach­ing three times, and afterwards expounding the holy scripture to a large company in the Minories. On Monday I rejoiced to meet with our little society, which now consisted of 32 persons. The next day I went to the condemned felons in Newgate, and offer­ed them free salvation. In the evening I went to a society in Bear-yard, and preached repentance and [Page 209] [...] of sins. The next evening I spoke the [...]th in love at a society in Aldersgate-street. Some contradicted at first; but not long: so that nothing but love appeared at our parting.

Thursday, 21. I went to a society in Gutterlane; but I could not declare the mighty works of God there; as I did afterwards at the Savoy in all simpli­city. And the word did not return empty.

Finding abundance of people greatly exasperated by gross misrepresentations of the words I had spoken, I went to as many of them in private, as my time would permit. God gave me much love towards them all. Some were convinced they had been mistaken. And who knoweth but God will soon return to the [...]est, and leave a blessing behind him?

On Sat. 23. I was enabled to speak strong words both at Newgate and Mr. E's society; and the next day at St. Anne's, and twice at St. John's Clerken­well: so that I fear they will bear me there no longer.

Tues. 26. I declared the gospel of peace to a [...]all company at Windsor. The next evening Mr. H. preached to the societies at Bow; but not the truth as it is in Jesus. I was afraid left the la [...]e shoul [...] [...]e turned out of the way: but God answered the thoughts of my heart, and took away my fear, in a [...]anner I did not expect, even by the words of Tho­mas Sternhold. They were these (sung immediately after the sermon.)

Sat. 30. One who had been a zealous opposer of this way, sent and desired to speak with me immediately. He had all the signs of settled despair, both in his coun­tenance and behaviour. He said, "He had been in­slaved to sin many years, especially to drunkenness; that he had long used all the means of grace, had constantly gone to church, and sacrament, had read the scripture, and used much private prayer, and yet was nothing profited." I desired we might join in prayer. After a short space he rose and his counte­nance was no longer sad. He said, "Now I know, God loveth me, and has forgiven my sins. And sin shall not have dominion over me: for Christ hath set me free." And according to his faith it was unto him.

Sund. Oct. 1. I preached both morning and after­noon at St. George's in the East. On the following days I endeavoured to explain the way of salvation, to many who had misunderstood what had been preach­ed concerning it.

Frid. 6. I preached at St. Antholin's once more. In the afternoon I went to the Rev. Mr. Bedford, to tell him between me and him alone, of the injury he had done both to: God and his brother, by preach­ing [Page 211]and printing that very weak sermon on assurance, which was an ignoratio clenchi from beginning to end; seeing the assurance we preach is of quite another bind from that he writes against. We speak of an assurance of our present pardon; not (as he does) of [...] final perseverance.

In the evening I began expounding at a little so­ciety in Wapping. On Sunday 8. I preached at the Savoy chapel (I suppose the last time) on the parable (or history rather) of the Pharisee and Publican pray­ing in the temple. On Mond. 9. I set out for Ox­ford. In walking I read the truly surprizing narra­tive of the conversions lately wrought in and about the town of Northampton in New-England. Surely this is the Lord's doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes!

An extract from this I wrote to a friend, concerning the state of those who are weak in faith. His an­swer, which I received at Bristol, on Sat. 14, threw me into great perplexity, till after crying to God, I took up a bible, which opened on these words; And Ja [...]z called on the God of Israel, saying, Oh, that thou wouldst bless me indeed, and inlarge my coast! And that thine hand might be with me, and that thou wouldst keep me from evil that it may not grieve me! And God granted him that which he requested.

This however, with a sentence in the evening lesson, put me upon considering my own state more deeply. And what then occurred to me was as follows:

"Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith." Now the surest test whereby we can examine our­selves, whether we be indeed in the faith, is that given by St. Paul, If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature. Old things are past away. Behold all things are become new.

First, His judgments are new his judgment of himself, of happiness, of holiness.

[Page 212] He judges himself to be altogether fallen short [...]f the glorious image of God. To have no good thing abiding in him; but all that is corrupt and abomina­ble: in a word, to be wholly earthly, sensual, and devilish: a motly mixture of beast and devil.

Thus, by the grace of God in Christ, I judge of myself. Therefore I am, in this respect, a new creature.

Again. His judgment concerning happiness is new. He would as soon expect to dig it out of the earth, as to find it in riches, honor, pleasure (so call­ed) or indeed in the enjoyment of any creature: he knows there can be no happiness on earth, but in the enjoyment of God, and in the foretaste of those rivers of pleasure which flow at his right-hand for evermore.

Thus, by the grace of God in Christ, I judge of happiness. Therefore I am, in this respect, a new creature.

Yet again. His judgment concerning holiness is now. He no longer judge [...] it to be an outward thing: to consist either, in doing no harm, in doing good, or in using the ordinances of God. He sees it is, the life of God in the soul; the image of God fresh stamped on the heart: an entire renewal of the mind in every temper and thought, after the likeness of him that created it.

Thus, by the grace of God in Christ, I judge of holiness. Therefore I am, in this respect, a new creature.

Secondly, His design [...] are new. It is the design of his life, not to heap up treasures upon earth, not to gain the praise of men, not to indulge the desires of the flesh, the desire of the eye, or the pride o [...] life; but to regain the image of God; to have the life of God again planted in his soul; and to be re­newed [Page 213]after his likeness, in righteousness and all t [...]ue holiness.

This, by the grace of God in Christ, is the de­sign of my life. Therefore I am, in this respect, a new creature.

Thirdly, His desires are new, and indeed the whole train of his passions and inclinations. They are no longer fixed on earthly things. They are now set on the things of heaven. His love, and joy, and hope, his sorrow, and fear, have all respect to things above. They all point heaven-w [...]rd. Where his treasure is, there is his heart also.

I dare not say I am a new creature in this respect. For other desires often arise in my heart. But they do not reign. I put them all under my feet through Christ which strengtheneth me. Therefore I believe he is creating me anew in this also, and that he has be­gun, though not finished, his work.

Fourthly, His conversation is new. It is always seasoned with salt, and fit to minister grace to the bearers.

So is mine, by the grace of God in Christ. There­fore, in this respect, I am a new creature.

Fifthly, His actions are new. The tenor of his life singly points at the glory of God. All his sub­stance and time are devoted thereto. Whether he eats or drinks, or whatever he does, it either springs from, or leads to, the love of God and man.

Such, by the grace of God in Christ, is the tenor of my life. Therefore, in this respect, I am a new creature.

But St. Paul tells us elsewhere, that the fruit of the Spirit is love, peace, joy, long-suffering, gentleness, meek­ness, temperance. Now although, by the grace of God in Christ, I find a measure of some of these in my­self, viz. of peace, long-suffering, gentleness, meek­ness, temperance: yet others I find not. I cannot [Page 214]find in myself the love of God or of Christ. Hence my deadness and wanderings in public prayer. Hence it is that even in the holy communion, I have fre­quently no more than a cold attention.

Again, I have not that joy in the Holy Ghost [...] no settled, lasting joy. Nor have I such a peace as excludes the possibility either of fear or doubt. When holy men have told me, "I had no faith," I have often doubted, whether I had or no. And those doubts have made me very uneasy, till I wa [...] relieved by prayer and the holy scriptures.

Yet upon the whole, although I have not yet that joy in the Holy Ghost, nor the full assurance of faith, much less am I, in the full sense of the words, in Christ a new creature: I nevertheless trust that I have a [...] measure of faith, and am accepted in the Beloved: I trust, the hand-writing that was against me is blotted out, and that I am reconciled to God through his Son.

Sund. 15. I preached twice at the castle, and afterwards expounded at three societies. Wednesday evening I came to London again, and on Friday met a society (of soldiers chiefly) at Westminster. On Sunday 22, I preached at Bloomsbury in the morning, and at Shadwell in the afternoon. Wednesday 25, I preached at Basingshaw church: on Friday morning at St. Antholin's: on Sunday at Islington and at London-Wall.

In the evening being troubled at what some said, of the kingdom of God within us, and doubtful of my own state, I called upon God, and received this an­swer from his word, He himself also waited for the king­dom of God. "But should not I wait in silence and retirement?" was the thought that immediately struck into my mind. I opened my testament again, on those words, Seest thou not, how faith wrought toge­ther with his works? And by works was faith made perfect.

[Page 215] Friday Nov. 3. I preached at St. Antholin's, Sunday 5, in the morning at St. Botolph's, Bishops-gate, in the afternoon at Islington, and in the evening to such a congregation as I never saw before, at St. Clement's in the Strand. As this was the first time of my preaching here, I suppose it is to be the last.

On Wednesday my brother and I went, at their earnest desire, to do the last good office to the con­demned malefactors. It was the most glorious instance I ever saw, of faith triumphing over sin and death. One observing the tears run fast down the cheeks of one of them in particular, while his eyes were steadily fixed upwards, a few moments before he died, asked, "How do you feel your heart now?" He calmly re­plied, "I feel a peace, which I could not have be­lieved to be possible. And I know it is the peace of God, which passeth all understanding."

My brother took that occasion of declaring the gospel of peace, to a large assembly of publicans and sinners. O Lord God of my fathers, accept even me among them, and cast me not out from among thy chil­dren!

In the evening I proclaimed mercy to my fellow-sinners at Basingshaw church: and the next morning at St. Antholin's. Friday 10, I set out, and Satur­day 11, spent the evening with a little company at Oxford. I was grieved to find, prudence had made them leave off singing psalms. I fear it will not stop here. God deliver me, and all that seek him in sin­cerity, from what the world calls Christian prudence!

Sunday 12. I preached twice at the castle. In the following week, I began more narrowly to en­quire what the doctrine of the church of England is, concerning the much controverted point of justifica­tion by FAITH. And the sum of what I found in the homilies, I extracted and printed for the use of others.

[Page 216] Sund. 19. I only preached in the afternoon at the castle. On Monday night I was greatly troubled in dreams, and about eleven o'clock waked in an un­accountable consternation, without being able to sleep again. About that time (as I found in the morning) one who had been designed to be my pupil, but was not, came into the Porter's lodge (where several per­sons were sitting) with a pistol in his hand. He pre­sented this, as in sport, first at one and then at ano­ther. He then attempted twice or thrice to shoot himself, but it would not go off. Upon his laying it down, one took it up, and blew out the p [...]iming. He was very angry, went and got fresh prime, came in again, sat down, beat the flint with his key; and about twelve, pulling off his hat and wig, said, "He would die like a gentleman," and shot himself through the head.

Thurs. 23. Returning from preaching at the cas­tle, I met once more with my old companion in afflic­tion, C. D. who stayed with me till Monday. His last conversation with me was as follows:

"In this you are better than you was at Savannah. You know that you was then quite wrong. But you are not right yet. You know that you was then blind. But you do not see now.

"I doubt not but God will bring you to the right foundation. But I have no hope for you, while you are on your present foundation. It is as different from the true, as the right hand from the left. You have all to begin anew.

"I have observed all your words and actions, and I see you are of the same spirit still. You have a sim­plicity: but it is a simplicity of your own. It is not the simplicity of Christ. You think you do not trust in your own works. But you do trust in your own works. You do not believe in Christ.

[Page 217] "You have a present freedom from sin. But it is only a temporary suspension of it, not a deliverance from it. And you have a peace. But it is not a true peace. If death were to approach, you would find all your fears return.

"But I am forbid to say any more. My heart sinks in me like a stone."

I was troubled. I begged of God an answer of peace, and opened on those words, As many as walk according to this rule, peace be on them, and mercy, and upon the Israel of God. I was asking in the evening, that God would fulfil all his promises in my soul, when I opened my testament on those words, My hour is not yet come.

Sund. Dec. 3. I began reading prayers at Bocar­do (the city prison) which had been long discontinu­ed. In the afternoon I received a letter, earnestly desiring me, to publish my account of Georgia: and another as earnestly dissuading me from it, "because it would bring much trouble upon me." I consulted God in his word and received two answers; the first Ezek. xxxiii. 2—6. The other, Thou therefore en­dure hardship, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.

Tues. Dec. 5. I began reading prayers and preaching in Gloucester-green workhouse, and on Thursday in that belonging to St. Thomas's parish. On both days I preached at the castle. At St. Tho­mas's was a young woman, raving mad, screaming and tormenting herself continually. I had a strong desire to speak to her. The moment I began she was still. The tears ran down her cheeks all the time I was tell­ing her, "Jesus of Nazareth is able and willing to deliver you." O where is faith [...]p [...]n [...] Why are these poor wretches left under [...] [...]ndage of Satan? Jesus, Master! Give th [...] med [...] to heal their sickness: and deliver those who are [...] ven­ed with unclean spirits!

[Page 218] About this time, being desirous to know how the work of God went on among our brethren at Lon­don, I wrote to many of them concerning the state of their souls. One or two of their answers I have subjoined.

My most dear and honoured father in Christ,

IN the twentieth year of my age, 1737, God was pleased to open my eyes, and to let me see that I did not live as became a child of God. I found my sins were great (though I was what they call a sober person) and that God kept an account of them all. However I thought, if I repented, and led a good life, God would accept me. And so I went on for about half a year, and had sometimes great jay. But last winter, I began to find, that whatever I did, was nothing, and the enemy of souls laid so many things to my charge, that sometimes I despair­ed of heaven. I continued in great doubts and fears till April 9, when I went out of town. Here for a time I was greatly transported, in seeing the glorious works of God: but in about three weeks I was vio­lently assaulted again. God then offered a Savious to me, but my self-righteousness kept me from laying hold on him.

On Whitsunday I went to receive the blessed sacra­ment, but with a heart as hard as a stone. Heavy­laden I was indeed, when God was pleased to let me see a crucified Saviour. I saw there was a fountain opened in his side for me to wash in and be clean. But alas! I was afraid to venture, fearing I should but too presumptuous. And I know, I at that time [Page 220]refused the atonement which I might then have hath Yet I received great comfort. But in about nine days time, my joy went out, as a lamp does for want of oil, and I fell into my old state. Yet I was not without hope; for ever after that time I could not despair of salvation: I had so clear a fight of the fountain opened in the side of our Lord▪ But still when I thought of death, or the day of judgment, it was a great terror to me. And yet I was afraid to venture to lay all my sins upon Christ.

This was not all. But whenever I retired to pray­er, I had a violent pain in my head. This only seized me when I began to pray earnestly, or to cry out aloud to Christ. But when I cried to him against this also, he gave me ease. Well, I found God did love me, and did draw me to Christ. I hungered and thirsted after him; but was still afraid to go boldly to Christ, and to claim him as my Saviour.

July 3. My dear sister came down to see me. She had received the atonement on St. Peter's day. I told her, I thought, Christ died for me, but as to the assurance she mentioned, I could say nothing.

July 5. She went. That night I went into the garden, and considering what she had told me, I saw him by faith, whose eyes are as a flame of fire, him who justifieth the ungodly. I told him I was ungodly, and it was for me that he died. His blood did I plead with great faith, to blot out the hand-writing that was against me. I told my Saviour, that he had promised to give rest, to all that were heavy-laden. This promise I claimed, and I saw him by faith, stand condemned before God in my stead. I saw the fountain opened in his side. I found, as I hungered, he fed me: as my soul thirst­ed, he gave me out of that fountain to drink. And so strong was my faith, that if I had had all the sins of the world laid upon me, I knew and was sure one drop of his blood was sufficient to alone for [Page 221]all. Well, I clave unto him, and he did wash me in his blood. He heath presented me to his Father and my Father, to his God and my God, a pure, spotless Virgin, as if I had never committed any sin, It is on Jesus I stand, the Saviour of sinners. It is he that [...] loved me, and given himself for me, I cleave unto him, as my surety, and he is bound to pay God the debt. While I stand on this rock, I am sure the gates of hell cannot prevail against me. It is by faith that I am justified, and have peace with God through him. His blood has made reconciliation to God for me. It is by faith I have received the atonement. It is by faith I have the Son of God and the Spirit of Christ dwelling in me. And what then shall separate me from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus my Lord?

You must think what a transport of joy I was then in, when I that was lost and undone, dropping into hell, felt a Redeemer come, who is mighty to save, to save unto the uttermost. Yet I did not receive the wit­ness of the Spirit at that time. But in about half an hour, the devil came with great power to tempt me. However I minded him not, but went in and lay down pretty much composed in my mind. Now St. Paul says after ye believed, ye were sealed with the Spirit of Promise. So it was with me. After I had believed on him that justifieth the ungodly, I received that seal of the spirit, which is the earnest of our inheritance.

July 6. In the morning, being by myself, I found the work of the spirit was very powerful upon me (altho you know God does not deal with every [...] same way). As my mother bore me wish great pain, so did I feel great pain in my soul in being born of God. Indeed I thought the pains of death were upon me, and that my soul was then tak­ing leave of the body. I thought I was going to [Page 222]him whom I saw with strong faith standing [...] to receive me. In this violent agony I continued about four hours; and then I began to feel the spirit of God bearing witness with my spirit, that I was born of God. Because I was a child of God he [...] forth the spirit of his Son into me, crying, Abba, Father. For that is the cry of every new-born soul. O migh­ty, powerful, happy change! I who had nothing but devils ready to drag me to hell, now found I had angels to guard me to my reconciled father, and my judge, who just before stood ready to condemn me, was now become my righteousness. But I cannot ex­press what God hath done for my soul. No; this is to be my everlasting employment when I have put off this frail, finful body, when I join with that great multitude which no man can number, in sing­ing praises to the Lamb that loved us, and gave himself for us! O how powerful are the workings of the Almighty in a new-born soul! The love of God was shed abroad in my heart, and a flame kindled there, so that my body was almost torn asunder. I loved. The Spirit cried strong in my heart. I trembled. I sung. I joined my voice with those that excel in strength. My soul was got up into the holy mount. I had o thoughts of coming down again into the body. I who not long before had called to the rocks to fall on me, and the moun­tains to cover me, could now call for nothing else but come, Lord Jesus, come quickly. Then I could cry out with great boldness, there, O God, is my surety! There, O death, is thy plague! There, O grave, is thy destruction! There, O serpent, is the seed, that shall for ever bruise thy head. O I thought my head was a fountain of water! I was dissolved in love. My beloved is mins, and I am his. He has all charms. He has ravished my heart. He is my comforter, my friend, my all. He is now in his [Page 223]garden, feeding among the lilies. O I am sick of love. He is altogether lovely, the chiefest among ten thousand.

Sunday 10. I administered the Lord's Supper at the Castle. At one I expounded at Mr. Fox's as usual. The great power of God was with us, and one who had been in despair several years, received a witness that she was a child of God.

Mond. 11. Hearing Mr. Whitefield was arrived from Georgia, I hastened to London; and on Tues. 12. God gave us once more to take sweet counsel together.

Fri. 15. I preached at St. Antholin's.

Sat. 16. One who had examined himself by the reflections wrote Oct. 14, made the following ob­servations on the state of his own soul.

1. I judge thus of myself. But I feel it not. Therefore there is in me still, the old heart of stone.

2. I judge thus of happiness. But I still hanker after creature-happiness. My soul is almost continual­ly running out after one creature or another, and imagining how happy I should be in such or such a condition. I have more pleasure in eating and drink­ing and in the company of those I love, than I have in God. I have a relish for earthly happiness. I have not a relish for Heavenly. I savour ( [...]) the things of men, not the things of God. Therefore there is in me still the carnal heart, the [...].

But the eyes of my understanding are not yet fully opened.

II. "This is the design of my live." But a thou­sand little designs are daily stealing into my soul. This is my ultimate design; but intermediate designs are continually creeping in upon me; designs (tho' often disguised) of pleasing myself, of doing my own will; designs, wherein I do not eye God, at least, not him singly.

[Page 224] Therefore my eye is not yet single; at least, not always so.

III. Are my desires new? Not all. Some are new, some old. My desires are like my designs. My great desire is, To have Christ formed in my heart by faith. But little desires are daily stealing into my soul. And so my great hopes and fears have respect to God. But a thousand little ones creep in between them.

Again, my desires, passions and inclinations in general are mixed: having something of Christ and something of earth. I love you, for instance. But my love is only partly spiritual, and partly natural. Something of my own cleaves to that which is of God. Nor can I divide the earthly part from the heavenly.

Sund. 17. I preached in the afternoon at Isling­ton: in the evening at St. Swithin's, for the last time. Sund. 24. I preached at Great St. Bar­tholomew's in the morning, and at Islington in the afternoon; where we had the blessed sacrament eve­ry day this week, and were comforted on every side.

Wed. 27. I preached at Basingshaw church; Sund. 31, to many thousands, in St. George's, Spital-Fields. And to a yet more crouded congre­gation at Whitechapel, in the afternoon, I declared those glad tidings (O that they would know the things which make for their peace!) I will heal their backsliding: I will love them freely.

Monday, January 1, 1739. Messrs. Hall, Kinchin, Ingham, Whitefield, Hutchins, and my brother Charles, were present at our love-feast in Fetterlans, with about sixty of our brethren. A [...] three in the morning, as we were continuing instant in prayer, the power of God come mightily upon us, insomuch that many cried out for exceeding joy, and many [Page 225]fell to the ground. As soon as we were recovered a little from that awe and amazement at the presence of his Majesty, we broke out with one voice, We praise thee, O God: we acknowledge thee to be the Lord.

Thursd. 4. One who had had the form of god­liness many years, wrote the following reflections.

"My friends affirm I am mad, because I said I was not a Christian a year ago. I affirm, I am not a Christian now. Indeed what I might have been I know not, had I been faithful to the grace then giv­en, when expecting nothing less, I received such a sense of the forgiveness of my sins, as till then I ne­ver knew. But that I am not a Christian at this day, I as assuredly know, as that Jesus is the Christ.

"For a Christian is one who has the fruits of the Spirit of Christ, which (to mention no more) are love, peace, joy. But these I have not. I have not any love of God. I do not love either the Father or the Son. Do you ask, How do I know whether I love God? I answer by another question, How do you know, whether you love me? Why, as you know, whether you are not or cold. You feel this moment, that you do or do not love me. And I feel this mo­ment, I do not love God; which therefore I know, because I feel it. There is no word more proper, more dear, or more strong.

"And I know it also by St. John's plain rule, If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For I love the world. I desire the things of the world, some or other of them, and have done all my life. I have always placed some part of my hap­piness in some or other of the things that are seen. Particularly in meat and drink, and in the company of those I loved. For many years I have been, yea, and still am hankering after a happiness, in loving, and being loved by one or another. And in these [Page 226]I have from time to time taken more pleasure th [...] in God.

"Again, joy in the Holy Ghost I have not. I have now and then some starts of joy in God: but it is not that joy. For it is not abiding. Neither is it greater than I have had on some worldly occasi­ons. So that I can in no wise be said to rejoice ever­more; much less to rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory.

"Yet again; I have not the peace of God; that peace, peculiarly so called. The peace I have may be accounted for on natural principles. I have health, strength, friends, a competent fortune, and a com­posed, cheerful temper. Who would not have a sort of peace in such circumstances? But I have none which can with any propriety be called, a peace which passeth all understanding.

"From hence I conclude (and let all the saints of the world hear, that whereinsoever they boast, they may be found even as I) though I have given, and do give all my goods to feed the poor, I am not a Christian. Though I have endured hardship, though I have in all things denied myself and taken up my cross, I am not a Christian. My works are nothing; my sufferings are nothing; I have not the fruits of the Spirit of Christ. Though I have constantly used all the means of grace, for twenty years, I am not a Christian."

Wednesday 17. I was with two persons, who I doubt are properly enthusiaests. For, first, they think to attain the end without the means, which is enthusi­asin, properly so called. Again, they think them­selves inspired by God, and are not. But false, ima­ginary inspiration is enthusiasm. That theirs is only imaginary inspiration appears hence, it contradicts the law and the testimony.

Sund. 21. We were surprized in the evening, while I was expounding in the Minories. A well­dressed, [Page 227]middle-aged woman, suddenly cried out, as in the agonies of death. She continued so to for some time, with all the signs of the sharpest anguish of spirit. When she was a little recovered, I desired her to call upon me the next day. She then told me, that about three years before, she was under strong convictions of sin, and in such terror of mind, that he had no comfort in any thing, nor any rest, day or night: that she sent for the minister of her parish and told him the distress she was in: upon which he told her husband she was stark mad, and advised him to send for a physician immediately. A physician was sent for accordingly, who ordered her to be blooded, blistered, and so on. But this did not heal her wound­ed spirit. So that she continued much as she was be­fore: till the last night, he whose word she at first found to be sharper than any two-edged sword, gave her a faint hope, that he would undertake her cause, and heal the soul which had sinned against him.

Thurs. 25. I baptized John Smith (late an Ana­baptist) and four other adults at Islington. Of the adults I have known baptized lately, one only was at that time born again, in the full sense of the word, that is, found a thorough, inward change, by the love of God filling her heart. Most of them were only born again in a lower sense, i. e. received the remissi­on of their sins. And some (as it has since too plain­ly appeared) neither in one sense nor the other.

Sund. 28. I went (having been long importuned thereto) about five in the evening, with four or five of my friends to a house where was one of those com­monly called French prophets. After a time, she came in. She seemed about four or five and twenty, of an agreeable speech and behaviour. She asked, Why we came? I said, "To try the spirits, whether they be of God." Presently after she leaned back in her chair, and seemed to have strong workings in her [Page 228]breast, with deep sighings intermixed. Her head and hands, and by turns, every part of her body seem­ed also to be in a kind of convulsive motion. This continued about ten minutes, till (at six) she began to speak (though the workings, sighings, and contorti­ons of her body, were so intermixed with her words, that she seldom spoke half a sentence together) with a clear, strong voice, "Father, Thy will, thy will be done. Thus faith the Lord, if of any of you that is a father, his child ask bread, will he give him a stone? If he ask a fish, will he give him a scorpion? Ask bread of me, my children, and I will give you bread. I will not, will not give you a scorpion. By this judge of what ye shall now hear."

She spoke much (all as in the person of God, and mostly in scripture words) of the fulfilling of the pro­phecies, the coming of Christ now at hand, and the spreading of the gospel over all the earth. Then she exhorted us, not to be in haste, in judging her spirit, to be or not to be of God; but to wait upon God, and he would teach us, if we conferred not with flesh and blood. She added, with many inforcements, "That we must watch and pray, and take up our cross, and be still before God."

Two or three of our company were much affected, and believed she spoke by the Spirit of God. But this was in no wise clear to me. The motion might be either hysterical or artificial. And the same words, any person of a good understanding and well versed in the scriptures might have spoken. But I let the mat­ter alone: knowing this, that if it be not of God, it will come to nought.

Sund. Feb. 4. I preached at St. Giles's on Who­soever believeth on one, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water. How was the power of God present with us! I am content to preach her [...] no more.

Frid. 9. A note was given me at Wapping, in (nearly) these words:

Tuesday 13. I received the following note.

Sat. 17. A few of us prayed with him; and from that time (as his parents since informed us) he had more rest (altho' not a full deliverance) than he had had for two years before.

Sund. 18. I was desired to preach at Sir George Wheeler's Chapel, in Spital-Fields, morning and af­ternoon. I did so in the morning, but was not suffer­ed to conclude my subject (as I had designed) in the afternoon; a good remembrance, that I should, if possible, declare at every time, the whole counsel of God.

[Page 230] Sund. 25. I preached in the morning to a nume­rous congregation, at St. Katherine's, near the tow­er; at Islington in the afternoon. Many here were (as usual) deeply offended. But the counsel of the Lord it shall stand.

Frid. March 2. It was the advice of all our bre­thren, that I should spend a few days at Oxford, whi­ther I accordingly went on Saturd. 3. A few names I found here also, who had not denied the faith, nei­ther been ashamed of their Lord, even in the midst of a perverse generation. And every day we were toge­ther, we had convincing proof, such as it had not before entered into our hearts to conceive, that he is able to save unto the uttermost all that come unto God thro' him.

One of the most surprising instances of his power which I ever remember to have seen, was on the Tues­day following; when I visited one who was above measure enraged at this new way, and zealous in op­posing it. Finding argument to be of no other effect, than to inflame her more and more, I broke off the dispute and desired we might join in prayer, which she so far consented to, as to kneel down. In a few minutes she fell into an extreme agony, both of bo­dy and soul; and soon after cried out with the utmost earnestness. "Now I know, I am forgiven for Christ's fake." Many other words she uttered to the same effect, witnessing a hope full of immortality. And from that hour, God hath set her face as a flint to declare the faith which before she persecuted.

Thurs. 8. I called upon her and a few of her neighbours, who were met together in the evening, among whom I found a gentleman of the same spi­rit she had been of, earnestly labouring to pervert the truth of the gospel. To prevent his going on, as the less evil of the two, I entered directly into the controversy, touching both the cause and the fruits [Page 231]of justification: In the midst of the dispute, one who sat at a small distance, felt as it were the piercing of a sword, and before she could be brought to another house, whither I was going, could not avoid crying out aloud, even in the street. But no sooner had we made our request known to God, than he sent her help from his holy place.

At my return from hence, I found Mr. Kinchin, just come from Dummer, who earnestly desired me, instead of setting out for London the next morning (as I designed) to go to Dummer and supply his church on Sunday. On Friday morning I set out, according to his desire, and in the evening came to Reading, where I found a young ^* man who had in some measure known the power of the world to come. I spent the evening with him and a few of his serious friends; and it pleased God much to strengthen and comfort them.

Sat. 10. In the afternoon I came to Dummer; and on Sunday morning had a large and attentive congregation. I was desired to expound in the even­ing at Basingstoke. The next day I returned to Reading, and thence on Tuesday to Oxford, where I found many more and more rejoicing in God their Saviour. Wednesday 14, I had an opportunity of preaching once again to the poor prisoners in the Castle. Thursd. 15. I set out early in the morning, and in the afternoon came to London.

During my stay here, I was fully employed; be­tween our own society, in Fetter-lane, and many others, where I was continually desired to expound: so that I had no thought of leaving London, when I received (after several others) a letter from Mr. Whitefield, and another from Mr. Seward, entreating me in the most pressing manner, to come to Bristol without delay. This I was not at all forward to do; [Page 232]and perhaps a little the less inclined to it (though I trust, I do not count my life dear unto myself, so I may finish my course with joy) because of the re­markable sriptures which offered as often as we en­quired, touching the consequence of this removal: probably permitted for the trial of our [...]. ^* Get thee up into this mountain—and die in the [...], whither thou goest up, and be gathered unto thy people. ^† And the children of Israel wept for Moses in the plains of Mo­ [...]b thirty days. ^‡ I will shew him, how great things he must suffer for my name's sake. ^‖ And devout men carried Stephen to his burial, and made great lamenta­tion over him.

Wed. 28. My journey was proposed to our society in Fetter-lane. But my brother Charles would scarce bear the mention of it; till appealing to the oracles of God, he received those words, as spoken to him­self, and answered not again: Son of man, behold I take from thee the desire of thine eyes with a stroke: Yet shalt thou not mourn or weep, neither shall thy tears run down. Our other brethren however continuing the dispute, without any probability of their coming to one conclusion, we at length all agreed, to decide it by lot. And by this it was determined, "I should go." Several afterwards desiring, we might open the bible, concerning the issue of this, we did so on the several portions of scripture, which I shall set down without any reflection upon them. ^§ Now there was long war between the house of Saul and the house of David; but David waxed stronger and stronger, and the house of Saul waxed weaker and weaker. ^¶ When [...] men have slain a righteous person in his own house upon his bed: Shall I not now require his blood at your hands, and take you away from the earth? ^** And Ah [...] [Page 233] slept with his fathers, and they buried him in the city, even in Jerusalem.

Perhaps it may be a satisfaction to some, if before I enter upon this new period of my life, I give the reasons, why I preferred for so many years an univer­sity life before any other: then especially, when I was earnestly pressed by my father, to accept of a cure of souls. I have here therefore subjoined the letter I wrote several years ago on that occasion:

Thurs. March 29. I left London, and in the evening expounded to a small company at Basingstoke. Sat. 31. In the evening I reached Bristol, and met Mr. Whitefield there. I could scarce reconcile my­self at first to this strange way of preaching in the fields, of which he set me an example on Sunday; having been all my life (till very lately) so tenacious of every point relating to decency and order, that I should have thought the saving of souls almost a sin, if it had not been done in a church.

April 1. In the evening (Mr. Whitefield being gone) I begun expounding our Lord's sermon on the mount (one pretty remarkable precedent of field-preach­ing, though I suppose there were churches at that time also) to a little society which was accustomed to meet once or twice a week in Nicholas-street.

Mond. 2. At four in the afternoon, I submitted to be more vile, and proclaimed in the highways the the glad tidings of salvation, speaking from a little eminence in a ground adjoining to the city, to about [Page 244] [...]ree thousand people. The scripture on which I spoke was this (is it possible may one should be ignorant, that is in fulfilled in every [...] minister of Christ?) The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor. He hath f [...] me [...]o h [...] the [...]; to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovery of sight to the blind: To [...] liberty thou that are [...]ruised, to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord.

At seven I began exp [...]ding the Acts of the Ap [...] [...], to a society meeting in Baldwin-street: and the next, day the gospel of St. John in the chapel of New­gate; where I also daily read the morning service of the church.

Wednes. 4. At Baptist-Mills (a sort of a suburb or village about half a mile [...] Beistol) I offered the grace of God to about fifteen hundred persons from these words, I will heal their [...]sliding, I will love them freely.

In the evening three women agreed to meet toge­ther weekly, with the same intention as those at Lo [...] ­ [...]n, viz. To [...]oufess their faults one to another, and pray one for another, that they may be b [...]aled. At eight, four young men agreed to meet, in pursuance of the same design. How dare any man deny this to be (as to the substance of it) a means of grace, ordained by God? Unless he will affirm (with Luther in the fury of his folifadianism) that St. James's epistle is an opis­tle of straw?

Thurs. 5. At five in the evening I began at a so­ciety in Castle-street, expounding the epistle to the Roman [...]; and the next evening at a society in Glou­cester-lane, the first epistle of St. John. On Satur­day evening at Weaver's-Hall also I begun expound­ing the epistle to the Romans, and declared that gos­pel to all, which is the power of God unto salvation, to every one that believeth.

[Page 245] [...] At seven in the morning I preached to about a thousand persons at Bristol, and afterwards to about fifteen hundred, as the top of Hannam-Mount in Kingswood. I called to them in the words of the angelical prophet. Ho! Every one that thirs [...]th, come [...] to the watert; come [...]nd buy wine and milk, without money, and without price. About five thousand were in the afternoon at Rose-Green (on the other side of Kingswood) among whom I stood and cried, in the name of the Lord, If any men thirst, let him come unto us and drink. He that believeth on me, as the scripture both said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.

Tues. 10. I was defired to go to Bath; where I offered to about a thousand souls, the free grace of God to heal their backslidings, and in the morning to (I believe) more than two thousand. I preached to about the same number, at Baptist-Mills in the after­noon on Christ, made of God unto us, wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption.

Sat. 14. I preached at the poor-house; three or four hundred more within, and more than twice that [...]ber without: to whom I explained these com­fortable words, When they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both.

Sund. 15. I explained at seven to 5 or 6000 per­sons, the story of the pharisee and the publican [...] About three thousand were present at Hannam-Mount. I preached at Newgate after dinner to a crouded congregation. Between five and fix we went to Rose­Green: it rained hard at Bristol, but not a drop fell upon us, while I declared to about five thousand, Christ our wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctifications and redemption. I concluded the day by shewing at the society in Baldwin [...]treet, That his blood elevenseth [...] from all son.

[Page 246] Tuesday 17. At five in the afternoon, I was at a little society in the Back-Lane. The room in which we were was propped beneath; but the weight of the people made the floor give way, so that in the beginning of the expounding the post which propped it, fell down with a great noise. But the floor sunk no further, so that after a little surprise at first, they quietly attended to the things that were spoken.

Thence I went to Baldwin-street, and expounded as it came in course, the 4th chap. of the Acts. We then called upon God to confirm his word. Immediately one that stood by (to our no small sur­prise) cried out aloud, with the utmost vehemence, even as in the agonies of death. But we continued in prayer, till a new song was put in her mouth, a thanksgiving unto our God. Soon after, two other persons (well known in this place, as labouring to live in all good conscience towards all men) were seized with strong pain, and constrained to roar for the disquietnes [...] of their heart. But it was not long before they like­wise burst forth into praise to God then Saviour. The last who called upon God as out of the belly of hell, was I— E— a stranger in Bristol. And in a short space he also was overwhelmed with joy and love, knowing that God had healed his backslidings. So many living witnesses hath God given, that his hand is still stretched out to heal, and that signs and wonders are even now wrought, by his holy child Jesus.

Wednes. 18. In the evening L—a S— (late a quaker, but baptized the day before) R—a M— and a few others, were admitted into the so­ciety. But R—a M— was scarcely able, either to speak or look up. The sorrows of death compassed her about, the pains of hell got hold upon her. We pour­ed out our complaints before God, and shewed him of her trouble. And he soon shewed, he is a God that heureth prayer, she felt in herself, that being justified [Page 247]freely, she had peace with God, thro' Jesus Christ. She rejoiced in hope of the glory of God, and the love of God was shed abroad in her heart.

April 20. Being Good-Friday, E—th R—n, T—l W—s, and one or two others first knew they had redemption in the blood of Christ, the remission of their sins.

Sat. 21. At Weaver's-hall a young man was sud­denly seized with a violent trembling all over, and in a few minutes, the sorrows of his heart being enlarged, sunk down to the ground. But we ceased not calling upon God, till he raised him up full of peace and joy in the Holy Ghost.

On Easter-Day, it being a thorough rain, I could only preach at Newgate at eight in the morning, and two in the afternoon; in a house near Hannam-Mount at eleven: and in one near Rose-green at five. At the society in the evening, many were cut to the heart, and many comforted.

Mond. 23. On a repeated invitation I went to Pensford, about five miles from Bristol. I sent to the minister, to ask leave to preach in the church, but having waited some time and received no answer, I called on many of the people who were gathered to­gether in an open place, If any man thirst, let him come unto me and drink. At four in the afternoon there were above three thousand, in a convenient place near Bristol, to whom I declared, The hour is coming, and now is, when the dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God, and they that hear shall live.

I preached at Bath to about a thousand on Tuesday morning, and at four in the afternoon to the poor colliers, at a place about the middle of Kingswo [...]d, called Two-Mile-hill. In the evening at Baldwin­street, a young man, after a sharp (though short) agony, both of body and mind, found his soul filled with peace, knowing in whom he had believed.

[Page 248] Wed. 24. To above two th [...]usand at Baptist-mi [...], I explained that glorious scripture (deseribed in the state of every true believer in Christ, every one who by faith is born of God) Ye have not received the spirit of bondage again unto fear, but ye have received the spirit of adoption, whereby we cry Abba, Father.

Thursd. 25. While I was preaching at Newgate on these words, He that believeth hath everlasting life; I was insensibly led, without any previous design, to declare strongly and explicitly, That God willeth all men to be thus saved; and to pray that, ‘If this were not the truth of God, he would not suffer the blind to go out of the way; but if it were, he would bear witness to his word.’ Immediately one, and mother, and another sunk to the earth: they dropped on every side as thunderstruck. One of them cried aloud. We besought God in her behalf, and he turn­ed her heaviness into joy. A second being in the same agony, we called upon God for her also; and he spoke peace unto her soul. In the evening I was again pressed in spirit to declare, that Christ gave himself a ransom for all. And almost before we called upon him, to set to his seal, be answered. One was so wound­ed by the sword of the spirit, that you would have imagined she could not live a moment. But imme­diately his abundant kindness was shewed, and she loud­ly sang of his righteousness.

Fr [...] 26. All Newgate rang with the cries of those whom the word of God cut to the heart. Two of whom were in a moment filled with joy, to the astonish­ment of those that beheld them.

Sund. 28. I declared the free grace of God to about four thousand people, from those words, He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall be not with him also freely give us all things? At that hour it was, that one who had long continued in fin, from a despair of finding mercy, re­ceived [Page 249]a full, clear sense of his pardoning love, and power to sin no more. I then went to Clifton (a mile from Bristol) at the minister's desire, who was dangerously ill, and thence returned to a little plain, near Hannam-mount, where about three thousand were present. After dinner I went to Clifton again. The church was quite full at the prayers and sermon, as was the church-yard at the burial which followed. From Clifton we went to Rose-green, where were (by computation) near seven thousand, and thence to Gloucester-lane Society. After which was our first Love-feast in Baldwin-street. O how has God renew­ed my strength! Who used ten years ago to be so faint and weary, with preaching twice in one day!

Mond. 29. We understood that many were offend­ed at the cries of those on whom the power of God came: among whom was a physician, who was much afraid there might be fraud or imposture in the case. To-day one whom he had known many years, was the first (while I was preaching at Newgate) who broke out into strong cries and sears. He could hard­ly believe his own eyes and ears. He went and stood close to her, and observed every symptom, till great drops of sweat ran down her face, and all her bones shook. He then knew not what to think, being clear­ly convinced, it was not fraud, nor yet any natural disorder. But when both her soul and body were healed in a moment, he acknowledged the finger of God.

Tues. May 1. Many were offended again, and in­deed, much more than before. For at Baldwin-street my voice could scarce be heard amidst the groanings of some, and the cries of others calling aloud to him that is mighty to save. I desired all that were sincere of heart, to beseech with me the Prince exalted for us, that he would proclaim deliverance to the captives. And he soon shewed that he heard our voice. Many of [Page 250]those who had been long in darkness, saw the dawn of a great light: and ten persons (I afterwards sound) then began to say in saith, my Lord and my God!

A Quaker who stood by, was not a little displeas­ed at the dissimulation of those creatures, and was biting his lips and knitting his brows, when he dropped down as thunder-struck. The agony he was in, was even terrible to behold. We besought-God, not to lay folly to his charge. And he soon lifted up his voice and cried aloud, "now I know, Thou art a prophet of the Lord."

Wed. 2. At Newgate, another mourner was com­sorted. I was desired to step thence to a neighbouring house to see a letter wrote against me, as a deceiver of the people, by teaching that God willeth all men to be saved. One who long had asserted the contrary was there, when a young woman came in (who could say before, "I know that my Redeemer liveth") all in tears and in deep anguish of spirit. She said, "She had been reasoning with herself, how these things could be, [...]ll she was perplexed more and more, and she now found the Spirit of God was departed from her." We began to pray, and she cried out, "He is come! He is come! I again rejoice in God my Saviour." Just as we rose from giving thanks, ano­ther person reeled four or five steps, and then dropped down. We prayed with her, and left her strongly convinced of sin, and earnestly groaning for de­liverance.

I did not mention one J—n H—n, a weaver, who was at Baldwin-street the night before. He was (I understood) a man of a regular life and conversa­tion, one that constantly attended the public prayers and sacrament, and was zealous for the church, and against dissenters of every denomination. Being in­formed that people fell into strange fits at the societies, he came to see and judge for himself. But he was [Page 251]less satisfied than before; insomuch that he went about to his acquaintance one after another, till one in the morning, and laboured above measure to convince them "It was a delusion of the devil." We were going home, when one met us in the street and in­formed us, "That J—n H— was fallen raving mad." It seems he had sat down to dinner, but had a mind first to end a sermon he had borrowed on ‘Salvation by saith.’ In reading the last page, he changed colour, fell off his chair, and began screaming ter­ribly and beating himself against the ground. The neighbours were alarmed and flocked together to the house. Between one and two I came in, and found him on the floor, the room being full of people, whom his wise would have kept without; but he cried aloud, "No; let them all come, let all the world see the just judgment of God." Two or three men were holding him as well as they could. He immediately fixed his eyes upon me, and stretching out his hand, cried, ‘Ay, this is he, who I said was a deceiver of the people. But God has over­taken me. I said, it was all a delusion. But this is no delusion.’ He then roared out, "O thou devil! Thou cursed devil! Yea, thou legion of devils! Thou canst not stay. Christ will cast thee out. I know his work is begun. Tear me to pieces, if thou wilt: but thou canst not hurt me." He then beat himself against the ground again; his breast heaving at the same time, as in the pangs of death, and great drops of sweat trickling down his face. We all be­took ourselves to prayer. His pangs ceased, and both his body and soul were set at liberty.

Thence I went to Baptist-mills, -and declared him whom God hath exalted to be a prince and a Saviour, to give repentance unto Israel and remission of sins. Re­turning to J—n H—, we found his voice was lost, and his body weak as that of an infant. But [Page 252]his soul was in peace, full of love, and rejoicing in hope of the glory of God.

The women of our society met at seven. During our prayer, one of them fell into a violent agony: but soon after began to cry out with confidence, My Lord and my God! Sat. 5. I preached at the desire of an unknown correspondent, on those excellent words (if well understood as recommending faith, resignation, patience, meekness) Be still, and know that I am God.

Sund. 6. I preached in the morning, to 5 or 6000 people, on, Except ye be converted and become as little children, ye cannot enter into the kingdom of heaven. (The same words on which I preached the next day, and on Wed. at Baptist-mills.) On Hannam-mount I preached to about three thousand, on The scripture hath concluded all under sin: at two at Clifton church, on Christ our wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption; and about five, at Rose-green, on the promise by faith of Jesus Christ, which is given to them that believe.

Mond. 7. I was preparing to set out for Pensford, having now had leave to preach in the church, when I received the following note:

Sir, Our minister, having been informed, you are beside yourself, does not care you should preach in any of his churches.—I went however, and on Priest-Down, about half a mile from Pensford, preached Christ our wisdom, righteousness, sanctification and redemption.

Tues. 8. I went to Bath, but was not suffered to be in the meadow where I was before: which occasioned the offer of a much more convenient place; where I preached Christ to about a thousand souls.

Wed. 9. We took possession of a piece of ground, near St. James's church-yard, in the Horse Fair, where it was designed to build a room, large enough to con­tain both the societies of Nicholas and Baldwin-street, [...] such of their acquaintance as might desire to be [Page 253]present with them, at such time as the scripture was expounded. And on Sat. 12. the first stone was laid, with the voice of praise and thanksgiving.

I had not at first the least apprehension or design, of being personally engaged, either in the expense of this work, or in the direction of it: having ap­pointed eleven feoffees, on whom I supposed these burthens would fall of course. But I quickly found my mistake; first with regard to the expense: for the whole undertaking must have stood still, had not I immediately taken upon myself the payment of all the workmen; so that before I knew where I was, I had con­tracted a debt of more than an hundred and fifty pounds. And this I was to discharge how I could; the subscriptions of both societies not amounting to one quarter of the sum. And as to the direction of the work, I presently received letters from my friends in London, Mr. Whitefield in particular, backed with a message by one just come from thence, that neither he nor they would have any thing to do with the building, neither contribute any thing towards it, unless I would instantly discharge all feoffees, and do every thing in my own name. Many reasons they gave for this; but one was enough, viz. "That such feoffees always would have it in their power, to con­troul me, and if I preached not as they liked, to turn me out of the room I had built." I according­ly yielded to their advice, and calling all the feoffees together, cancelled (no man opposing) the instrument made before, and took the whole management into my own hands. Money, it is true, I had not, nor any human prospect or probability of procuring it. But I knew the earth is the Lord's, and the fulness there­of, and in his name set out, nothing doubting.

In the evening, while I was declaring, that Jesus Christ had given himself a ransom for all, three persons almost at once, sunk down as dead, having all their [Page 254]sins set in array before them. But in a short- time they were raised up, and knew that the Lamb of God who taketh away the sin of the world, had taken away their sins.

Sund. 13. I began expounding in the morning, the xiiith chapter of the first epistle to the Corinthi­ans. At Hannam I farther explained, the promise given by faith; as I did also at Rose-green. At Clifton it pleased God to assist me greatly, in speak­ing on those words, He that drinketh of this water shall thirst again; but whoso drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst: but the water which I shall give him shall be in him a well of water, springing up in­to everlasting life.

My ordinary employment (in public) was now as follows: Every morning I read prayers and preached at Newgate. Every evening I expounded a portion of scripture, at one, or more of the societies. On Monday in the afternoon I preached abroad near Bris­tol; on Tuesday at Bath and Two-Mile-hill alternate­ly. On Wednesday at Baptist-mills. Every other Thursday near Pensford. Every other Friday in an­other part of Kingswood. On Saturday in the after­noon and Sunday morning, in the Bowling-green (which lies near the middle of the city.) On Sunday at eleven near Hannam-mount. At two at Clifton, and at five on Rose-green. And hitherto as my day is, so my strength hath been.

Tues. 15. As I was expounding in the Back-lane, on the righteousness of the Scribes and Pharisees, many who had before been righteous in their own eyes, abhorred themselves as in dust and ashes. But two, who seemed to be more deeply convinced than the rest, did not long sorrow as men without hope; but found in that hour, that they had an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous: as did three others in Gloncester-lane the evening before, and [Page 255]three at Baldwin-street this evening. About ten, two who after seeing a great light, had again reasoned themselves into darkness, came to us, heavy laden. We cried to God, and they were again filied with peace and joy in believing.

Wednes. 16. While I was declaring at Baptist-mills, He was wounded for our transgressions, a middle-aged man began violently beating his breast, and crying to him by whose stripes we are healed. During our pray­er, God put a new song in his mouth. Some mock­ed and others owned the hand of God. Particularly a woman of Baptist-mills, who was now convinced of her own want of an advocate with God, and went home full of anguish, but was in a few hours filled with joy, knowing he had blotted out all her trans­gressions.

The scripture which came in turn at Newgate to­day, was the viith of St. John. The words which I chiefly insisted on as applicable to every minister of Christ, who in any wise follows the steps of his Master, were these, The world cannot hate you; but me it hateth, because I testify of it, that its deeds are evil. There was a murmuring therefore concerning him among the multitude; for some said, He is a good man: others said, Nay, but he deceiveth the people. After sermon I was inform­ed the sheriffs had ordered, "I should preach he [...] for the future, but once a week." Yea, and this is once too often, if he deceiveth the people: but if other­wise, why not once a day?

Satur. 19. At Weaver's-hall, a woman first, and then a boy (about fourteen years of age) was overwhelm­ed with sin, and sorrow, and fear. But we cried to God, and their souls were delivered.

Sund. 20. Seeing many of the rich at Clifton church, my heart was much pained for them, and I was earnestly desirous that some even of them might enter into the kingdom of heaven. But full as I was, I [Page 256]knew not where to begin, in warning them to flee from the wrath to come, till my testament opened on those words, I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance: in applying which, my soul was so en­larged, that methought I could have cried out (in ano­ther sense than poor, vain Archimedes) "Give me where to stand, and I will shake the earth." God's sending forth lightning with the rain, did not hinder about fifteen hundred from staying at Rose-green. Our scripture was, It is the glorious God that muketh the thunder. The voice of the Lord is mighty in operation, the voice of the Lord is a glorious voice. In the even­ing, he spoke to three whose souls were all storm and tempest, and immediately there was a great calm.

During this whole time, I was almost continually asked, either by those who purposely came to Bristol, to enquire concerning this strange work, or by my old or new correspondents, How can these things be? And innumerable cautions were given me (generally grounded on gross misrepresentations of things) "Not to regard visions or dreams; or to fancy people had remission of sins, because of their cries, or tears, or bare outward professions." To one who had many times wrote to me on this head, the sum of my an­swer was as follows:

"The question between us turns chiefly, if not whol­ly, on matter of fact. You deny, that God does now work these effects: at least, that he works them in this manner. I affirm both; because I have heard these things with my own ears, and have seen them with my eyes. I have seen (as far as a thing of this kind can be seen) very many persons changed in a moment, from the spirit of fear, horror, despair, to the spirit of love, joy and peace; and from sinful desire till then reign­ing over them, to a pure desire of doing the will of God. These are matters of fact, whereof I have been, and almost daily am, an eye or ear-witness, [Page 257]What I have to say touching visions or dreams is this: I know several persons in whom this great change was wrought, in a dream, or during a strong representa­tion to the eye of their mind, of Christ either on the cross or in glory. This is the fact; let any judge of it as they please. And that such a change was then wrought, appears (not from their shedding tears only, or falling into fits, or crying out: these are not the fruits, as you seem to suppose, whereby I judge, but) from the whole tenor of their life, till then many ways wicked; from that time, holy, just and good.

"I will shew you him that was a lion till then, and is now a lamb; him that was a drunkard, and is now exemplarily sober: the whoremonger that was, who now abhors the very garment spotted by the flesh. These are my living arguments for what I assert, viz. That God does now, as aforetime, give remission of sins and the gift of the Holy Ghost, even us and to our children: yea, and that always suddenly, as far as I have known, and often in dreams or in the visions of God. If it be not so, I am found a false witness before God. For these things I do, and by his grace will, testify."

"Perhaps it might be, because of the hardness of our hearts, unready to receive any thing, unless we see it with our eyes, and hear it with our ears, that God in tender condescension to our weakness, suffered so many outward signs of the very time when he wrought this inward change, to be continually seen and heard among us. But although they saw signs and wonders (for so I must term them) yet many would not believe. They could not indeed deny the facts; but they could explain them away. Some said, ‘These were purely natural ef­fects; the people fainted away, only because of the heat and closeness of the rooms.’ And others were sure, ‘It was all a cheat: they might help it [Page 258]if they would. Else why were these things only in their private societies? Why were they not done in the face of the sun?’ To-day Mond. 2 [...], our Lord answered for himself. For while I was en­forcing these words, Be still and know that I am God, he began to make bare his arm, not in a close room, neither in private, but in the open air, and before more than two thousand witnesses. One, and another, and another was struck to the earth; exceedingly trembling at the presence of his power. Others cried, with a loud and bitter cry, What must we do to be saved [...] And in less than an hour, seven persons, wholly unknown to me till that time, were rejoicing, and singing, and with all their might giving thanks to the God of their salvation.

In the evening, I was interrupted at Nicholas-street, almost as soon as I had begun to speak, by the cries of one who was pricked at the heart, and strongly groaned for pardon and peace. Yet I went on to de­clare what God had already done, in proof of that important truth, That he is not willing any should pe­rish, but that all should come to repentance. Another person dropped down, close to one who was a strong asserter of a contrary doctrine. While he stood astonished at the sight, a little boy near him was seized in the same manner. A young man who stood up behind, fixed his eyes on him, and sunk down him­self as one dead: but soon began to roar out and beat himself against the ground, so that six men could scarcely hold him. His name was Thomas Maxfield. Except J—n H—n, I never saw one so torn of the evil one. Mean while many others began to cry out to the Saviour of all, that he would come and help them, insomuch that all the house (and indeed all the street for some space) was in an uproar. But we continued in prayer; and before ten, the greater part found rest to their souls.

[Page 259] I was called from supper to one who feeling in her­self such a conviction as she never had known before, had run out of the society in all haste, that she might not expose herself. But the hand of God followed her still, so that after going a few steps, she was forced to be carried home, and when she was there, grew worse and worse. She was in a violent agony when we came. We called upon God, and her soul found rest.

A [...] out twelve I was greatly importuned, to go and visit one person more. She had only one struggle af­ter I came, and was then filled with peace and joy.

I think twenty-nine, in all, had their heaviness turned into joy, this day.

Tues. 22. I preached to about a thousand at [...]ath. There were several fine, gay things among them, to whom especially I called, Awake thou that sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light!

Sat. 26. One came to us in deep despair; but af­ter an hour spent in prayer, went away in peace. The next day, ha [...]ing observed in many, a zeal which did not suit with the sweetness and gentleness of love, I preached at Rose-green on those words (to the largest congregation I ever had there, I believe up­wards of ten thousand souls) Ye know not what man­ner of spirit ye are of. For the Son of Man is not come to destroy men's lives, but to save them. At the society in the evening, eleven were deeply convinced of sin, and soon after comforted.

Mond. 28. I began preaching at Weaver's-hall, at eleven in the forenoon; where two persons were enabled to cry out in faith, My Lord and my God! As were seven, during the sermon in the afternoon, before several thousand witnesses; and ten in the evening at Baldwin-street; of whom two were chil­dren.

[Page 260] Tues. 29. I was unknowingly engaged in conver­sation, with a famous Infidel, a confirmer of the un­faithful in these parts. He appeared a little surprised, and said, He would pray to God to shew him the true way of worshipping him.

On ascension-day in the morning, some of us went to King's-Weston-Hill, four or five miles from Bris­tol. Two gentlemen going by, sent up to us in sport, many persons from the neighbouring villages: to whom therefore I took occasion to explain those words, Thou art ascended up on high, thou hast led cap­tivity captive; and received gifts for men, yea, even for the rebellious, that the Lord God might dw [...]ll among them.

Sund. June 3. In the morning to about six thou­sand persons, in concluding the xiiith chapter of the first epistle to the Corinthians, I described a truly cha­ritable man. At Hannam-mount I enforced those words, That every mouth may be stopped, and all the world become guilty before God: And again in the af­ternoon at Rose-green, to I believe eight or nine thousand. In the evening not being permitted to meet in Baldwin-street, we met in the shell of our new society-room. The scripture which came in course to be explained, was, Marvel not, if the world hate you. We sung

And God, even our own God, gave us his blessing

M [...]nd. 4. Many came to me and earnestly advised me, "Not to preach abroad in the afternoon, be­cause there was a combination of several persons, who threatened terrible things." This [...] being spread abro [...]d brought many thither, or the better sort of peo­ple (so called) and added, I believe, more than a [Page 261]thousand to the ordinary congregation. The ser [...] ­ture to which, not my choice, but the providence of God directed me was, Fear not thou, for I am with thee: he not dismayed, for I am thy God. I will strengthen thee, yea, I will help thee, yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. The pow­er of God came with his wor [...] so that none scoffed, or interrupted, or opened his mouth.

Tues. 5. There was great expectation at Bath, of what a noted man was to do to me there: and I was much entreated, "Not to preach; because no one knew what might happen." By this re [...]ort I also gained a much larger audience, among whom were many of the rich and great. I told them plainly, The scripture had concluded them all under sin, high and low, rich and poor, one with another. Many of them seemed to be a little surprised, and were sink­ing a-pace into seriousness, when their champion ap­peared, and coming close to me, asked "By what authority I did these things?" I replied, By the au­thority of Jesus Christ, conveyed to me by the (now) Archbishop of Canterbury, when he laid his hands up­on me and said, "Take thou authority to preach the gospel." He said, "This is contrary to act of par­liament. This is a conventicle." I answered, "Sir, the conventicles mentioned in that act (as the pream­ble shews) are seditious meetings. But this is not such. Here is no shadow of sedition. Therefore it is not contrary to that act." He replied, "I say it is. And b [...]side, your preaching frightens people out of their wits." Sir, did you ever hear me preach? No. How then can you judge of what you never heard? Sir, by common report. Common report is not enough. Give me leave, Sir, to ask, is not your name Nash? My name is Nash. Sir, I dare not judge of you by common report. I think it not enough to judge by. Here he paused a-while, and having recovered himself, said, [Page 262]"I desire to know, what this people comes here for?" On which one replied, "Sir, leave him to me. Let an old woman answer him." "You, Mr. Nash, take care of your body. We take care of our souls, and for the food of our souls we come here." He replied not a word, but walked away.

As I returned, the street was full of people, hur­rying to and fro, and speaking great words. But when any of them asked, "Which is he?" and I replie [...]. "I am he," they were immediately silent. S [...]eral ladies following me into Mr. Merchant's house, the servant told me, "There were some wanted to speak to me." I went to them and said, "I believe, ladies, the maid mistook: you only wanted to look at me." I added, "I do not expect that the rich and great should want either to speak with me, or to hear me; for I speak the plain truth; a thing you hear little of, and do not desire to hear." A few more words past between us, and I retired.

Tues. 7. I preached at Priest-Down, on What must we do to be saved? In the midst of the prayer after sermon, two men (hired, as we afterwards understood, for that purpose) began singing a ballad. After a few mild words (for I saw some that were angry) used without effect, we all began singing a psalm, which put them utterly to silence. We then poured out our souls in prayer for them, and they appeared altogether confounded. O may this be a day much to be remembered by them, for the loving-kindness of the Lord!

Mond. 11. I received a pressing letter from Lon­don (as I had several others before) to come thither as soon as possible; "Our brethren in Fetter-lane being in great confusion, for want of my presence and advice." I therefore preached in the afternoon on these words, I take you to record this day, that I am pure from the blood of all men; for I have not shun [...]d [Page 263]to declare unto you all the counsel of God. After ser­mon, I commended them to the grace of God, in whom they had believed. Surely God hath yet a work to do in this place. I have not found such love, no not in England; nor so childlike, artless, teachable a temper, as he hath given to this people.

Yet during this whole time I had many thoughts, concerning the unusual manner of my ministering among them. But after frequently laying it before the Lord, and calmly weighing whatever objections I heard against it, I could not but adhere to what I had some time since wrote to a friend, who had freely spoken his sentiments concerning it. An extract of that letter I here subjoin: that the matter may be placed in a clear light.

Wed. 13. In the morning I came to London, and after receiving the holy communion at Islington, I had once more an opportunity of seeing my mother, whom I had not seen since my return from Germany.

I cannot but mention an odd circumstance here. I had read her a paper in June last year, containing a short account of what had passed in my own soul, till within a few days of that time. She greatly approved it and said "She heartily blessed God, who had brought me to so just a way of thinking." While I was in Germany, a copy of that paper was sent (without my knowledge) to one of my relations. He sent an account of it to my mother; whom I now found under strange fears concerning me, being con­vinced by " an account taken from one of my own pa­pers, that I had greatly erred from the faith." I [Page 267]could not conceive, what paper that should be; but on enquiry found, it was the same I had read her my­self.—How hard is it to form a true judgment of any person or thing, from the account of a prejudiced re­later! yea, though he be ever so honest a man: For he who gave this relation, was one of unquestionable veracity. And yet by his sincere account of a writing which lay before his eyes, was the truth so totally disguised, that my mother knew not the paper she had heard from end to end, nor I that I had my­self wrote.

At six I warned the women at Fetter-lane (know­ing how they had been lately shaken) not to believe every spirit, but to try the spirits, whether they were of God. Our brethren met at eight, when it pleased God to remove many misunderstandings and offences that had crept in among them: and to restore in good measure the spirit of love and of a sound mind.

Thurs. 14. I went with Mr. Whitefield to Black­heath, where were, I believe, 12 or 14000 people. He a little surprised me, by desiring me to preach in his stead; which I did (though nature recoiled) on my favourite subject, Jesus Christ, who of God is made unto us wisdom, righteousness, sanctification and re­demption.

I was greatly moved with compassion for the rich that were there, to whom I made a particular ap­plication. Some of them seemed to attend, while others drove away their coaches from so uncouth a preacher.

Frid. 15. I had much talk with one who is called a quaker. But he could not receive my saying. I was too strict for him, and talked of such a perfection, as he could not think necessary: being persuaded, there was no harm in costly apparel, provided it was plain and grave: Nor in putting scarlet or gold upon our houses, so it were not upon our clothes.

[Page 268] In the evening I went to a society at Wapping, weary in body and faint in spirit. I intended to speak on Romans iii. 19. but could not tell how to open my mouth: and all the time we were singing, my mind was full of some place, I knew not where, in the epistle to the Hebrews. I begged God to direct, and opened the book on Heb. x. 19. Having there­fore, br [...]thren, boldness to enter into the holiest, by the blood of Jesus: by a new and living way which he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, his flesh.—Let us draw near with a true heart, in full assurance of faith: having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water. While I was earnestly inviting all sinners to enter into the holiest by this new and living way, many of those that heard, began to call upon God with strong cries and tears. Some sunk down and there remained no strength in them; others exceedingly trembled and quaked; some were torn with a kind of convulsive moti­on in every part of their bodies, and that so violently, that often four or five persons could not hold one of them. I have seen many hysterical and many epileptie fits: but none of them were like these, in many respects. I immediately prayed, "That God would not suffer those who were weak to be offended. But one wo­wan was offended greatly; being sure " they might help it if they would, no one should persuade her to the contrary;" and was got three or four yard [...], when she also dropped down, in as violent an agony as the rest. Twenty-six of those who had been thus affect­ed (most of whom during the prayers which were made for them, were in a moment filled with peace and joy) promised t [...] call upon [...] the next day. But only eighteen came; by talking closely with whom I found reason to believe, that some of them had gone home to their house justified. The rest seemed to be patiently waiting for it.

[Page 269] Sat. 16. We met at Fetter-lane, to humble our­selves before God, and own he had justly withdrawn his Spirit from us, for our manifold unfaithfulness. We acknowledged our having grieved him by our di­visions, one saying, I am of Paul, another, I am of Apollos. By our leaning again to our own works, and trusting in them, instead of Christ; by our rest­ing in those little beginnings of sanctification, which it had pleased him to work in our souls; and above all, by blaspheming his work among us, imputing it either to nature, to the force of imagination and ani­mal spirits, or even to the delusion of the devil. In that hour, we found God with us as at the first. Some fell prostrate upon the ground. Others burst out, as with one consent, into loud praise and thanks­giving. And many openly testified, there had been no such day as this since January the first preceding.

Sund. 17. I preached at seven in Upper Moor­ [...]ields, to (I believe) six or seven thousand people on, Ho! every one that thirsteth, come ye to the waters. In the afternoon I saw poor R—d T—n, who had left our society, and the church. We did not dispute, but pray; and in a short space the scales fell off from his eyes. He gladly returned to the church, and was in the evening re-admitted into our society.

At five I preached on Kennington-common, to about fifteen thousand people, on those words, Look unto him, and be ye saved, all ye ends of the earth.

Mond. 18. I left London early in the morning, and the next evening reached Bristol, and preached (as I had appointed, if God should permit) [...]o a nu­merous congregation. My text now also was, Look unto him, and be ye saved, all ye ends of the earth. Howel Harris called upon me an hour or two after. He said, "He had been much dissuaded from either hearing or seeing me, by many who said all manner [Page 270]of evil of me. But, said he, as soon as I heard you preach, I quickly found what spirit you was of. And before you had done, I was so overpowered with joy and love, that I had much ado to walk home."

It is scarce credible, what advantage Satan had gain­ed during my absence of only eight days. Disputes had crept into our little society, so that the love of many was already waxed cold. I shewed them the state they were in the next day (both at Newgate and at Baptists-mills) from those words, Simon, Simon, be­hold Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat. And when we met in the evening, instead of reviving the dispute, we all betook ourselves to prayer. Our Lord was with us. Our divisions were healed. Misunderstandings vanished away. And all our hearts were sweetly drawn together, and united as at the first.

Frid. 22. I called on one who did run well, till he was hindered by some of those called French pro­phets. Wo unto the prophets, saith the Lord, who pro­phesy in my name, and I have not sent them. At Wea­ver's-hall, I endeavoured to point them out, and ear­nestly exhorted all that followed after holiness, to avoid as fire, all who do not speak, according to the law and the testimony.

In the afternoon I preached at the Fish-ponds, but had no life or spirit in me; and was much in doubt, whether God would not lay me aside, and send other labourers into his harvest. I came to the society full of this thought; and began in much weakness to ex­plain, ' Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they be of God. I told them, "They were not to judge of the spirit, whereby any one spoke, either by appearances, or by common report, or by their own inward feelings. No, nor by any dreams, visions or revelations, supposed to be made to their souls, any [Page 271]more than by their tears, or any involuntary effects wrought upon their bodies." I warned them, "all these were in themselves, of a doubtful, disputable nature: they might be from God, and they might not; and were therefore not simply to be relied on (any more than simply to be condemned) but to be tried by a farther rule, to be brought to the only certain test, the law and the testimony." While I was speaking, one before me dropped down as dead, and presently a second and a third. Five others sunk down in half an hour, most of whom were in violent agonies. The pains [...] of hell came about them; the suares of death over [...] them. In their trouble we called upon the Lord, and he gave us an answer of peace. One indeed continued an hour in strong pain; and one or two more for three days. But the rest were great­ly comforted in that hour, and went away rejoicing and praising God.

Sat. 23. I spoke severally with those who had been so troubled the night before. Some of them, I found, were only convinced of sin; others had indeed found rest to their souls. This evening ano­ther was seized with strong pangs, But in a short time her soul was delivered.

Sund. 24. As I was riding to Rose-green, in a smooth, plain part of the road, my horse suddenly pitched upon his head, and rolled over and over. I received no other hurt than a little bruise on one side, which for the present I felt not, but preached with­out pain to 6 or 7000 people on that important di­rection, Whether ye eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. In the evening a girl of 13 or 14, and four or five other persons, some of whom had felt the power of God before, were deeply con­vinced of sin, and with sighs and groans which could not be uttered, called upon God for deliverance.

[Page 272] Mond. 25. About ten in the morning, J—e C—r, as she was sitting at work, was suddenly seized with grievous terrors of mind, attended with strong trem­bling. Thus she continued all the afternoon; but at the society in the evening God turned her heaviness into joy. Five or six others were also out to the heart this day: and soon after found him whose hands make whole: as did one likewise, who had been mourning many months, without any to comfort her.

Tues. 26. I preached near the house we had a few days before began to build for a school, in the middle of Kingswood, under a little sycamore-tree, during a violent storm of rain, on those words, As the rain cometh down from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth and maketh it bring forth and bud:—So shall my word be that goeth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void. But it shall accom­plish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I send it.

Three persons terribly felt the wrath of God abid­ing on them, at the society this evening. But upon prayer made in their behalf, he was pleased soon to lift up the light of his countenance upon them.

Frid. 29. I preached in a part of Kingswood, where I never had been before. The places in Kingswood where I now usually preached were these; once a fortnight, a little above Connam, a village on the south side of the wood; on Sunday morning, near Hannam-m [...]mt: once a fortnight, at the school-house, in the middle of Kingswood. On Sunday in the even­ing at Rose-gr [...]; and once a fortnight near the Fish­ponds, on the north side of the wood.

Satur. 30. At Weaver's-hall, seven or eight persons were constrained to roar aloud, while the sword of the spirit was dividing asunder their souls and spirits, and joints and marrow. But they were all relieved upon [Page 273]prayer, and sang praises unto our God, and unto the Lamb that liveth for ever and ever.

I gave a particular account, from time to time, of the manner wherein God here carried on his work, to those whom I believed to desire the increase of his kingdom, with whom I had any opportunity of corresponding. Part of the answer, which I receiv­ed (some time after) from one of these, I cannot but here subjoin.

[Page 275] Sund. July [...]. I preached to about five thousand, on the favourite advice of the infidel in Ecclesiastes (so zealously enforced by his brethren now) Be not righteous overmuch. At Hannam and at Rose-green, I explained the latter part of the viith of St. Luke: that verse especially, When they had nothing to pay, he frankly forgave them both.

A young woman sunk down at Rose-green, in a violent agony both of body and mind: as did five or six persons in the evening at the New-room, at whose cries many were greatly offended. The same offence was given in the morning by one at Weaver's-hall, and by eight or nine others, at Gloucester-lane in the evening. The first that was deeply touched was L— W—; whose mother had been not a little displeased a day or two before, when she was told, how her daughter had exposed herself before all the congregation: the mother herself was the next who dropped down, and lost her senses in a moment; but went home with her daughter, full of joy, as did most of those that had been in pain.

Soon after the society, I went to Mrs. T—'s, whose nearest relations were earnestly dissuading her, from being righteous overmuch; and by the old motive, Why shouldst thou destroy thyself? She answered all they advanced with meekness and love, and continued stedfast and immovable. Endure hardship still, thou good soldier of Christ! Persecuted, but not forsaken: torn with inward, and encompassed with outward temptations: but yielding to none. O may patience have its perfect work!

Tues. 3. I preached at Bath to the most attentive and serious audience I have ever seen there. On Wednesday I preached at Newgate on those words, Because of the Pharisees, they durst not confess him.—For they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God. A message was delivered to me when I had [Page 276]done, from the sheriffs, "That I must preach there no more."

Frid. 6. I pressed a serious quaker to tell me, Why he did not come to hear me as formerly? he said, "Because he found we were not led by the Spirit; for we fixed times of preaching beforehand; whereas we ought to do nothing unless we were sensibly moved thereto by the Holy Ghost." I asked, "Whether we ought not to do what God in scripture commands, when we have opportunity? Whether the providence of God thus concurring with his word, were not a suf­ficient reason for our doing it, although we were not at that moment sensibly moved thereto by the Holy Ghost?" He answered, "It was not a sufficient reason. This was to regard the letter that killeth." God grant, that I may so regard it all the days of my life!

In the afternoon I was with Mr. Whitefield just come-from London, with whom I went to Baptist-mills, where he preached concerning the Holy Ghost, which all who believe, are to receive; not without a just, though severe, censure of those, who preach as if there were no Holy Ghost.

Sat. 7. I had an opportunity to talk with him of those outward signs, which had so often accompanied the inward work of God. I found his objections were chiefly grounded on gross misrepresentations of matter of fact. But the next day he had an oppor­tunity of informing himself better. For no sooner had he begun (in the application of his sermon) to invite all sinners, to believe in Christ, than four per­sons sunk down close to him, almost in the same mo­ment. One of them lay without either sense or mo­tion. A second trembled exceedingly. The third bad strong convulsions all over his body, but made no noise, unless by groans. The fourth, equally con­vulsed, called upon God, with strong cries and tears. [Page 277]From this time I trust, we shall all suffer God to car­ry on his own work in the way that pleaseth him.

Thurs. 13. I went to a gentleman who is much troubled with what they call lowness of spirits. Many such have I been with before; but in several of them, it was no bodily distemper. They wanted something, they knew not what, and were therefore heavy, uneasy, and dissatisfied with every thing. The plain truth is, they wanted God, they wanted Christ, they wanted faith. And God convinced them of their want, in a way their physicians no more understood than them­selves. Accordingly nothing availed till the Great Physician came. For in spite of all natural means, he who made them for himself, would not suffer them to rest, till they rested in him.

On Friday in the afternoon I left Bristol with Mr. Whitefield, in the midst of heavy rain. But the clouds soon dispersed, so that we had a fair, calm evening, and a serious congregation at Thornbury.

In the morning we breakfasted with a quaker, who had been brought up in the church of England: but being under strong convictions of inward sin, and apply­ing to several persons for advice, they all judged him to be under a disorder of body, and gave advice ac­cordingly. Some quakers with whom he met about the same time, told him, it was the hand of God up­on his soul; and advised him to seek another sort of relief than those miserable comforters had recommend­ed. Wo unto you, ye blind leaders of the blind! How long will ye pervert the right ways of the Lord? Ye who tell the mourners in Zion, Much religion hath made you mad! Ye who send them whom God hath wounded to the devil for cure; to company, idle books or diversions! Thus shall they perish in their iniquity; but their blood shall God require at your hands!

[Page 278] We had an attentive congregation at Gloucester in the evening. In the morning, Mr. Whitefield being gone forward, I preached to about five thousand there, on Christ our wisdom, righteousness, sanctification and re­demption. It rained violently at five in the evening; notwithstanding which two or three thousand people stayed, to whom I expounded that glorious vision of Ezekiel, of the resurrection of the dry bones.

Monday 16. After preaching to two or three thou­sand on, What must I do to be saved? I returned to Bristol, and preached to about three thousand, on those words of Job, There the wicked cease from troubling; there the weary are at rest.

Tues. 17. I rode to Bradford, five miles from Bath, whither I had been long invited to come. I waited on the minister, and desired leave to preach in his church. He said, "It was not usual to preach on the week-days: but if I could come thither on a Sunday, he should be glad of my assistance." Thence I went to a gentleman in the town, who had been present when I preached at Bath, and with the strongest marks of sincerity and affection, wished me good l [...]ck in the name of the Lord. But it was past. I found him now quite cold. He began disputing on several heads, and at last told me plainly, one of our own college had informed him, "They always took me to be a little crack-brained at Oxford."

However some persons who were not of his mind, having pitched upon a convenient place (called Bear-field or Bury-field) on the top of the hill under which the town lies: I there offered Christ to about a thou­sand people, for wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption. Thence I returned to Bath, and preached on, What must I do to be saved? to a larger audience than ever before. I was wondering the God of this world was so still: when at my return from the place of preaching, poor R— d M—l told me, [Page 279] He could not let me preach any more in his ground. I asked him, why? He said, "The people hurt his trees, and stole things out of his ground. And be­sides (added he) I have already by letting thee be there, merited the displeasure of my neighbours." O fear of man! Who is above thee, but they who indeed wor­ship God in spirit and in truth? Not even those who have one foot in the grave! Not even those who dwell in rooms of cedar; and who have heaped up gold as the dust, and silver as the sand of the sea!

Sat. 21. I began expounding a second time our Lord's sermon on the mount. In the morning, Sun­day 22, as I was explaining Blessed are the poor in spi­rit, to about three thousand people, we had a fair op­portunity of shewing all men what manner of spirit we were of. For in the middle of the sermon, the press-gang came, and seized on one of the hearers (ye learned in the law, what becomes of magna charta, and of English liberty and property? Are not these mere sounds, while, on any pretence, there is such a thing as a press-gang suffered in the land?) all the rest standing still, and none opening his mouth or lifting up his hand to resist them.

Mond. 23. To guard young converts from fancying, that they had already attained or were already perfect, I preached on those words, So is the kingdom of God, as when a man casteth seed into the ground—And riseth day and night, and the seed buddeth forth and springeth up he knoweth not how—first the blade, then the ear, then the full corn in the ear.

On several evenings this week, and particularly on Friday, many were deeply convinced; but none were delivered from that painful conviction, The children came to the birth; but there was not strength to bring forth. I fear we have grieved the Spirit of the jealous God, by questioning his work: and that therefore he is with­drawn [Page 280]from us for a season. But he will return and abundantly pardon.

Mond. 30. Two more were in strong pain, both their souls and bodies being well-nigh torn asunder. But though we cried unto God, there was no answer, nei­ther did he as yet deliver them at all.

One of these had been remarkably zealous against those that cried out and made a noise, being sure that any of them might help it if they would. And the same opinion she was in still, till the moment she was struck through as with a sword, and fell trembling to the ground. She then cried aloud, though not articulate­ly, her words being swallowed up. In this pain she continued twelve or fourteen hours, and then her soul was se [...] at liberty. But her master (for she was a ser­vant till that time, at a gentleman's in town) forbid her returning to him, saying, He would have none in his house who had received the Holy Ghost.

Tues. 31. I preached at Bradford to above two thousand, many of whom were of the better rank, on What must I do to be saved? They all behaved with decency, and none went away till the service was end­ed. While I was preaching at Bath, on my return, some of the audience did not behave so well; being, I fear, a little too nearly concerned, when I came to the application of those words, Not only this our craft is in danger to be set at nought: but also that the temple of the great goddess Diana should be despised—whom all Asia and the world worshippeth.

Having a caution against religious delusion, put into my hands about this time, I thought it my duty to write to the author of it: which I accordingly did, in the following terms:

I have often wished, that all calm and impartial men, would consider what is advanced by another writer, in a little discourse concerning enthusiasm or religious delusion, published about this time. His words are,

[Page 284] "A minister of our church, who may look upon it as his duty to warn his partshioners, or an author who may think it necessary to caution his readers, against such preachers or their doctrine (enthusiastic preachers, I suppose, such as he takes it for granted the Method­ist preachers are) ought to be very careful to act with a Christian spirit, and to advance nothing but with temper, charity, and truth.—Perhaps the following rules may be proper to be observed by them.

1. Not to blame persons for doing that now, which scripture records holy men of old to have practised, lest had they lived in those times, they should have condemned them also.

2. Not to censure persons in holy orders, for teach­ing the same doctrines which are taught in the scrip­tures and by our church; lest they should ignorantly censure, what they profess to defend.

3. Not to censure any professed members of our church, who live good lives, for resorting to religious assemblies in private houses, to perform in society acts of divine worship; when the same seems to have been practised by the primitive Christians; and when alas! there are so many parishes, where a person piously disposed, has no opportunity of joining in the pub­lic service of our church, more than one hour and an half in a week.

4. Not to condemn those who are constant attend­ants on the communion and service of our church, if they sometimes use other prayers in private assemblies. since the best divines of our church have composed and published many prayers, that have not the sancti­on of public authority; which implies a general con­sent, that our church has not made provision for every private occasion.

5. Not to establish the power of working miracles as the great criterion of a divine mission; when scrip­ture teaches us, that the agreement of doct [...] [...] [Page 285]truth as taught in those scriptures, is the only [...].

6. Not to drive any away from our church, by op­probriously calling them dissenters, or treating them as such, so long is they keep to her communion.

7. Not lightly to take up with silly stories that may be propagated to the discredit of persons of a general good character.

"I do not lay down (says he) these negative rules so much for the sake of any persons whom the un­observance of them would immediately injure, as of our church and her professed defenders. For church­men, however well-meaning, would lay themselves open to censure, and might do her irretrievable damage, by a behaviour contrary to them."

Friday, August 3. I met with one who did run well, but Satan had hindered her. I was surprised at her inge­nuous acknowledgment of the fear of man. O how hardly shall even they who have rich acquaintance enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Sund. 5. Six persons at the New-room were deeply convinced of sin: three of whom were a lit­tle comforted by prayer; but not yet convinced of righteousness.

Having frequently been invited to Wells, particu­larly by Mr. —, who begged me to make his house my home, on Thursday the 9th I went thither, and wrote him word the night before; upon which he pre­sently went to one of his friends, and desired a messenger might be sent to meet me and beg me "To turn back, otherwise (said he) we shall lose all our trade." But this consideration did not weigh with him, so that he invited me to his own house: and at eleven I preach­ed in his ground, on Christ our wisdom, righteousness, sanc­tification, and redemption, to about 2000 persons. Some of them mocked at first, whom I reproved before all; and those of them who stayed were more serious. [Page 286]Several spoke to me after, who were for the present much affected. O let it not pass away as the morn­ing dew!

Frid. 10. I had the satisfaction of conversing with a Quaker, and afterwards with an Anabaptist, who, I trust, have had a large measure of the love of God shed abroad in their hearts. O may those, in every persuasion, who are of this spirit, increase a thousand­fold, how many so ever they be!

Sat. 11. In the evening two were seized with strong pangs, as were four the next evening, and the same number at Gloucester-lane on Monday, one of whom was greatly comforted.

Tues. 14. I preached at Bradford to about three thousand, on, One thing is needful. Returning through Bath, I preached to a small congregation suddenly gathered together at a little distance from the town (not being permitted to be in R— M—'s ground any more) on, The just shall live by faith. Three at the New-room this evening were cut to the heart. But their wound was not as yet healed.

Wednes. 15. I endeavoured to guard those who were in their first love, from falling into inordinate affection, by explaining those strange words at Baptist-mills, Henceforth know we no man after the flesh.

Friday 17. Many of our society met, as we had appointed, at one in the afternoon, and agreed "That all the members of our society should obey the church to which we belong, by observing all Fridays in the year, as days of fasting or abstinence." We likewise agreed, that as many as had opportunity should then meet, to spend an hour together in prayer.

Wedn. 22. I was with many that were in heaviness: two of whom were soon filled with peace and joy. In the afternoon I endeavoured to guard the weak against what too often occasions heaviness, levity of temper or [Page 287]behaviour, from, I said of laughter, it is mad; and of mirth, What doth it?

Mond. 27. For two hours I took up my cross, in arguing with a zealous man, and labouring to convince him, ‘That I was not an enemy to the church of England.’ He allowed, ‘I taught no other doctrines than those of the church;’ but could not forgive my teaching them out of the church-walls. He allowed too (which none indeed can deny, who has either any regard to truth or sense of shame) that ‘by this teaching many souls who till that time were pe­rishing for lack of knowledge, have been, and are brought from darkness to light and from the power of Satan unto God.’ But he added, ‘No one can tell, what may be hereafter; and therefore I say, these things ought not to be suffered.’

Indeed the report now current in Bristol was, "That I was a Papist, if not a Jesuit." Some added, ‘That I was born and bred at Rome;’ which many cor­dially believed. O ye fools, when will ye understand, that the preaching justification by faith alone, the allow­ing no meritorious cause of justification, but the death and righteousness of Christ, and no conditional or in­strumental cause, but faith, is overturning popery from the foundation? When will ye understand, that the most destructive of all those errors, which Rome, the mother of abominations hath brought forth (com­pared to which transubstantiation and a hundred more, are trifles light as air) is, That we are justified by works (or to express the same thing a little more decently) by faith and works. Now, do I preach This? I did for ten years; I was (fundamentally) a papist, and knew it not. But I do now testify to all (and it is the ve­ry point for asserting which I have to this day been called in question) that "no good works can be done before justification, none which have not in them the nature of sin."

[Page 288] I have often enquired, who are the authors of this report; and have generally found they were either bigotted dissenters, or (I speak without fear or favour) ministers of our own church. I have also frequently considered, what possible ground or motive they could have thus to speak: seeing few men in the world have had occasion so clearly and openly to declare their principles, as I have done, both by preaching, print­ing, and conversation, for several years last past. And I can no otherwise think, than that either they spoke thus (to put the most favourable construction upon it) from gross ignorance: they knew not what popery was; they knew not what doctrines those are which the Papists teach: or they wilfully spoke what they knew to be false, probably thinking thereby to do God service. Now, take this to yourselves, whosoever ye are, high or low, dissenters or churchmen, clergy or laity, who have advanced this shameless charge, and digest it how you can.

But how have ye not been afraid, if ye believe there is a God, and that he knoweth the secrets of your hearts (I speak now to you, preachers, more especially, of whatever denomination) to declare so gross, palpable a lie, in the name of the God of truth? I cite you all before the Judge of all the earth, either publicly to prove your charge; or by publicly retract­ing it, to make the best amends you can, to God, to me, and to the world.

For the full satisfaction of those who have been abused by these shameless men, and almost brought to believe a lie, I will here add my serious judgment concerning the church of Rome, wrote some time since to a priest of that communion.

Tuesd. 28. My mouth was opened, and my heart enlarged, strongly to declare to above two thousand people at Bradford, That the kingdom of God (within us) is not meat and drink, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Ghost. At Bath I once more of­fered Christ to justify the ungodly. In the evening I met my brother, just come from London. The Lord hath indeed done great things for us already. Not [...] us, but unto thy name be the praise.

Wednesday 29. I rode with my brother to Wells and preached on, What must I do to be saved? In the evening I summed up at the New-room, what I had said at many times, from the beginning, of faith, holiness and good works, as the root, the tree and the fruit, which God had joined, and man ought not to put asunder.

Friday, Aug. 31. I left Bristol, and reached London, about eight on Sunday morning. In the afternoon I heard a sermon wherein it was asserted, that our repentance was not sincere, but feigned and hypocritical, 1. If we relapsed into sin, soon after re­penting: especially if 2. We did not avoid all occasi­ons of sin, or if 3. We relapsed frequently; and most of all, if 4. Our hearts were hardened thereby. O what a hypocrite was I (if this be so) for near twice ten years! But I know it is not so. I know every [Page 292]one under the law, is even as I was. Every one when he begins to see his fallen state, and to feel the wrath of God abiding on him, relapses into the sin that most easily besets him, soon after repenting of it. Some­times he avoids, and at many other times cannot per­suade himself to avoid the occasions of it. Hence his relapses are frequent, and of consequence his heart is hardened more and more. And yet all this time, he is sincerely striving against sin. He can say unseigned­ly, without hypocrisy, the thing which I do, I approve not; the evil which I would not, that I do. To will is even then present with him; but how to perform that which is good, he finds not. Nor can he, with all his sincerity avoid any one of these four marks of hypocrisy, till being justified by faith, he hath peace with God, through Jesus Christ our Lord.

This helpless state I took occasion to describe at Kennington, to eight or ten thousand people, from those words of the psalmist, Innumerable troubles are come about me; my sine have taken such hold upon me, that I am not able to look up: yea, they are more in number than the hairs of my head, and my heart hath failed me.

Mond. Sept. 3. I talked largely with my mother, who told me, that till a short time since, she had scarce heard such a thing mentioned, as the having forgive­ness of sins now, or God's Spirit bearing witness with our spirit: much less did she imagine, that this was the common privilege of all true believers. "There­fore (said she) I never durst ask for it myself. But two or three weeks ago, while my son Hall was pro­nouncing those words, in delivering the cup to me, The blood of our Lord Jesus Christ, which was given for thee; the words struck through my heart, and I knew God for Christ's sake had forgiven me all my sins."

I asked, Whether her father (Dr. Annesley) had not the same faith? And whether she had not heard [Page 293]him preach it to others? She answered, "He had it himself, and declared a little before his death, that for more than forty years, he had no darkness, no fear, no doubt at all, of his being accepted in the Beloved. But that nevertheless, she did not remember to have heard him preach, no, not once, explicitly upon it: whence she supposed he also looked upon it as the pecu­liar blessing of a few, not as promised to all the peo­ple of God."

Both at Mr. B—'s at six, and at Dowgate-hill at eight, were many more than the houses could con­tain. Several persons who were then convinced of sin, came to me the next morning. One came also, who had been mourning long, and earnestly desired us to pray with her. We had scarce begun, when the enemy began to tear her, so that she screamed out as in the pangs of death. But his time was short: for within a quarter of an hour, she was full of the peace that passeth all understanding.

I afterwards called on Mrs. E—r, with whom was one lately come from Bristol, in deep anguish of spirit. We cried to God, and he soon declared his salvation, so that both their mouths were filled with his praise.

Thence I went to a poor woman who had been long in despair. I was glad to meet with Mrs. R— there; the person mentioned in Mr. Whitefield's jour­nal, who after three years madness (so called) was so deeply convinced of sin at Beach-lane, and soon after rejoiced in God her Saviour.

Thurs. 6. I was sent for by one who began to feel herself a sinner. But a fine lady unexpectedly com­ing in, there was scarce room for me to speak. The fourth person in the company was a poor unbred girl; who beginning to tell what God had done for her soul, the others looked one at another, as in amaze, but did not open their mouths. I then exhorted them, [Page 294]not to cease from crying to God, till they too could say, as she did, "My beloved is mine, and I am his: I am as sure of it, as that I am alive. For his spirit bears witness with my spirit, that I am a child of God."

Sund. 9. I declared to about ten thousand in Moorfields, what they must do to be saved. My mo­ther went with us about five to Kennington, where were supposed to be twenty thousand people. I again insisted on that foundation of all our hope, Believe in the Lord Jesus, and thou shalt be saved. From Ken­nington I went to a society at Lambeth. The house being filled, the rest stood in the garden. The deep attention they shewed gave me a good hope, that they will not all be forgetful hearers.

Thence I went to our society at Fetter-lane, and exhorted them to love one another. The want of love was a general complaint. We laid it open be­fore our Lord. We soon found, he had sent us an answer of peace. Evil surmisings vanished away. The flame kindled again as at the first, and our hearts were knit together.

Mond. 10. I accepted a pressing invitation to go to Plaistow. At five in the evening I expound­ed there, and at eight again. But most of the hear­ers were very quiet and unconcerned. In the morn­ing therefore I spoke stronger words. But it is only the voice of the Son of God, which is able to wake the dead.

Wednes. 12. In the evening at Fetter-lane, I described the life of faith, and many who had fan­cied themselves strong therein, found they were no more than new-born babes. At eight I exhorted our brethren to keep close to the church, and to all the ordinances of God, and to aim only at liv­ing a quiet and peaceable life, in all godliness and honesty.

[Page 295] Thurs. 13. A serious clergyman desired to know, in what points we differ from the church of England? I answered, "To the best of my knowledge, in none: the doctrines we preach, are the doctrines of the church of England: indeed the fundamental doctrines of the church, clearly laid down, both in her prayers, arti­cles, and homilies."

He asked, in what points then do you differ from the other clergy of the church of England? I answer­ed, "In none from that part of the clergy who ad­here to the doctrines of the church; but from that part of the clergy who dissent from the church (though they own it not) I differ in the points following:

First, They speak of justification, either as the same thing with sanctification, or as something con­sequent upon it. I believe justification to be wholly distinct from sanctification, and necessarily antecedent to it.

Secondly, They speak of our own holiness or good works, as the cause of our justification; or, that for the sake of which, on account of which we are justi­fied before God. I believe, neither our own holiness nor good works, are any part of the cause of our justification; but that the death and righteousness of Christ, are the whole and sole cause of it; or, that for the sake of which, on account of which, we are jus­tified before God.

Thirdly, They speak of good works, as a condition of justification, necessarily previous to it. I believe no good work can be previous to justification, nor consequently a condition of it: but that we are justi­fied (being till that hour ungodly, and therefore in­capable of doing any good work) by faith alone, faith without works, faith (though producing all, yet) including no good work.

[Page 296] Fourthly, They speak of sanctification (or holiness) as if it were an outward thing, as if it consisted chiefly, if not wholly, in these two points, 1. The doing no harm, 2. The doing good (as it is called) i. e. The using the means of grace, and helping our neighbour.

I believe it to be, an inward thing, namely, The life of God in the soul of man; a participation of the divine nature; the mind that was in Christ; or, the renewal of our heart, after the image of him that created us.

Lastly, They speak of the new birth, as an outward thing, as if it were no more than baptism; or, at most, a change from outward wickedness to outward goodness; from a vicious to (what is called) a virtuous life. I be­lieve it to be an inward thing; a change from inward wickedness to inward goodness; an entire change of our inmost nature from the image of the devil (where­in we are born) to the image of God: a change from the love of the creature to the love of the Creator, from earthly and sensual, to heavenly and holy affec­tions: in a word, a change from the tempers of the spirits of darkness, to those of the angels of God in heaven.

There is therefore a wide, essential, fundamental, irreconcileable difference between us: so that if they speak the truth as it is in Jesus, I am found a false witness before God. But if I teach the way of God in truth, they are blind leaders of the blind.

Sund. 16. I preached at Moorfields to about ten thousand, and at Kennington common to I believe near twenty thousand, on those words of the calmer Jews to St. Paul, We desire to hear of thee what thou thinkest: for as concerning this sect, we know that every where it is spoken against. At both places I described the real difference between what is generally called Christianity, and the true old Christianity, which un­der [Page 297]the new name of Methodism [...] spoken against.

Mond. 17. I preached again [...] are those that mourn. It pleased God to give us in that hour, two living instances of that piercing sense both of the guilt and power of sin, that dread of the wrath of God, and that full conviction of man's inability either to remove the power, or atone for the guilt of sin (called by the world despair) in which properly con­sist that poverty of spirit and mourning which are the gate of Christian blessedness.

Tues. 18. A young woman came to us at Isling­ton, in such an agony as I have seldom seen. Her sorrow and fear were too big for utterance; so that after a few w [...]ds, her strength as well as her heart failing, she sunk down to the ground. Only her sighs and her groans shewed she was yet alive. We cried unto God in her behalf. We claimed the promises made to the weary and heavy-laden: and he did not cast out our prayer. She saw her Saviour, as it were, crucified before her eyes. She laid hold on him by faith, and her spirit revived.

At Mr. B—'s at six, I was enabled earnestly to call all the weary and heavy-laden: and at Mr. C—'s at eight, when many roared aloud; some of whom ut­terly refused to be comforted, till they should feel their souls at rest in the blood of the Lamb, and have his love shed abroad in their hearts.

Thurs. 20. Mrs. C— being in deep heaviness, had desired me to meet her this afternoon. She had long earnestly desired to receive the holy communion, having an unaccountably strong persuasion, "That God would manifest himself to her therein, and give rest to her soul." But her heaviness being now greatly in­creased, Mr. D—e gave her that fatal advice, "Not to communicate till she had living faith." This still added to her perplexity. Yet at length she resolved [Page 298]to obey God father than man. And he was made known unto her in breaking of bread. In that moment she [...] her load removed, she knew she was accepted in the beloved; and all the time I was expounding at Mr. [...]—'s, was full of that peace which cannot be uttered.

Frid. 21. Another of Dr. Monro's patients came to desire my advice. I found no reason to believe she had been any otherwise mad than every one is, who is deeply convinced of sin. And I cannot doubt, but if she will trust in the living God, he will give medi­cine to heal her sickness.

Sund. 23. I declared to about ten thousand in Moorfields, with great enlargement of spirit, The kingdom of God is not meat and drink, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Ghost. At Kennington I enforced to about twenty thousand, that great truth, One thing is needful. Thence I went to Lambeth and shewed (to the amazement, it seemed, of many who were present) how he that is born of God doth not commit sin.

Mond. 24. I preached once more at Plaistow, and took my leave of the people of that place. In my return, a person galloping swiftly, rode full against me, and overthrew both man and horse: but without any hurt to either. Glory be to him who saves both man and beast!

Tues. 25. After dining with one of our brethren who was married this day, I went (as usual) to the society at St. James's, weary and weak in body. But God strengthened me for his own work; as he did at six at Mr. B—'s; and at eight in Winchester-yard, where it was believed were present eleven or twelve hundred persons: to whom I declared, if they had nothing to pay, God would frankly forgive them all.

[Page 299] Thurs. 27. I went in the afternoon to a society at Deptford, and thence at six came to Turner's-hall; which holds (by computation) two thousand persons. The press both within and without was ve­ry great. In the beginning of the expounding, there being a large vault beneath, the main beam which supported the floor, broke. The floor immediately sunk, which occasioned much noise and confusion among the people. But, two or three days before a man had filled the vault with hogsheads of to­bacco. So that the floor, after sinking a foot or two, rested upon them, and I went on without in­terruption.

Frid. 28. I m [...]t with a fresh proof, that whatsoe­ver ye ask, believing, ye shall receive. A middle-aged woman desired me to return thanks for her to God, who as many witnesses then present testified, was a day or two before really distracted, and as such tied down in her bed. But upon prayer made for her, she was instantly relieved, and restored to a found mind.

Mond. October 1. I rode to Oxford; and found a few who had not yet forsaken the assembling them­selves together: to whom I explained that holiness without which no man shall see the Lord.

Tues. 2. I went to many, who once heard the word with joy; but when the sun arose, the seed wi­thered away. Yet some still desired to follow their Lord. But the world stood fawning or threatening between them. In the evening I shewed them the tender mercies of God, and his readiness still to re­ceive them. The tears ran down many of their cheeks. O thou lover of souls, seek and save that which is lost!

Wednes. 3. I had a little leisure to take a view of the shattered condition of things here. The poor prisoners both in the castle and in the city prison, had [Page 300]now none that cared for their souls, none to instruct, advise, comfort and build them up in the knowledge and love of the Lord Jesus. None was left to visit the work-houses, where also we used to meet with the most moving objects of compassion. Our little school, where about twenty poor children, at a time, had been taught for many years, w [...]s on the point of be­ing broke up; there being none now, either to sup­port, or to attend it. And most of those in the town, who were once knit together, and strengthened one another's hands in God, were torn asunder and scat­tered abroad. It is time for thee, Lord, to lay to thy hand!

At eleven, a little company of us met to intreat God, for the remnant that was left. He immediately gave us a token for good. One who had been long in the gall of bitterness, full of wrath, strife and en­vy, particularly against one whom she had once ten­derly loved, rose up and shewed the change God had wrought in her soul, by falling upon her neck, and with many tears kissing her. The same spirit we found reviving in others also; so that we left them, not without hope, that the seed which had been sown even here, shall take root downward, and bear fruit upward.

About six in the evening I came to Burford: and at seven preached to, it was judged, twelve or fifteen hundred people, on, Christ made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption. Find­ing many approved of what they had heard, that they might not rest in that approbation, I explained an hour or two after the holiness of a christian: and in the morning I shewed the way to this holiness, by giving both the false and the true answer to that important question, What must I do to be saved?

About three in the afternoon, I came to Mr. Ben­jamin Seward's, at Bengeworth, near Evesham. At [Page 301]five I expounded in his house (part of the xiiith chap­ter of the first of Corinthians) and at seven in the school-house, where I invited all who had nothing to pay, to come and accept of free forgiveness. In the morning I preached near Mr. Seward's house to a small, serious congregation, on those words, I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

In the evening I reached Gloucester. Sat. 6. At five in the evening I explained to about a thousand people, the nature, the cause, and the condition or instrument of justification, from these words, To him that worketh not, but believeth on him that justifieth the ungodly, his saith is counted to him for righteousness.

Sand. 7. A few, I trust, out of two or three thou­sand, were awakened by the explanation of those words, God hath not given unto you the spirit of bondage again, to fear; but he hath given unto you the spirit of adoption, wherely we cry, Abba, Father. About ele­ven I preached at Runwick, seven miles from Glou­cester. The church was much crouded, though a thousand or upwards stayed in the church-yard. In the afternoon I explained further the same words, What must I do to be saved? I believe some thousands were then present, more than had been in the morning. O what a harvest is here! When will it please our Lord, to send more labourers into his harvest?

Between five and six I called on all who were pre­sent (about three thousand) at Stanley, on a little green near the town, to accept of Christ, as their on­ly wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption. I was strengthened to speak as I never did before, and continued speaking near two hours: the darkness of the night, and the little lightning not lessening the number, but increasing the seriousness of the hearers. I concluded the day by expounding part of our Lord's sermon on the mount, to a small, serious company at [...].

[Page 302] Mond. 8. About eight I reached Hampton-com­mon, nine or ten miles from Gloucester. There were, it was computed, five or six thousand persons. I ex­horted them all, to come unto God, as having no­thing to pay. I could gladly have stayed longer with this loving people: but I was now straitened for time. After sermon I therefore hastened away, and in the evening came to Bristol.

Tues. 9. My brother and I rode to Bradford. Finding there had been a general misrepresentation of his last sermon, as if he had asserted reprobation therein, whereby many were greatly offended; he was constrained to explain himself on that head, and to shew in plain and strong words, that God willeth all men to be saved. Some were equally offended at this. But whether men will hear or whether they will for­bear; we may not shun to declare unto them, all the counsel of God.

At our return in the evening not being permitted to meet at Weaver's hall, we met in a large room on Temple-backs, where (having gone through the sermon on the mount and the epistle of St. John) I began that of St. James, that those who had already learned the true nature of inward holiness, might be more fully instructed in outward holiness, without which also we cannot see the Lord.

Wednes. 10. Finding many to be in heaviness, whom I had left full of peace and joy, I exhorted them at Baptist-mills, to look unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith. We poured out our com­plaint before him in the evening, and found that he was again with us of a truth. One came to us soon after I was gone home, who was still in grievous darkness. But we commended her cause to God, and he immediately restored the light of his coun­tenance.

[Page 303] Thurs. 11. We were comforted by the coming in of one who was a notorious drunkard and common swearer. But he is washed, and old things are passed away. Such power belongeth unto God. In the even­ing our Lord rose on many who were wounded, with healing in his wings: and others who till then were careless and at ease, felt the two-edged sword that cometh out of his mouth.

One of these shewed the agony of her soul by cry­ing aloud to God for help, to the great offence of many, who eagerly rebuked her that she should hold her peace. She continued in great torment all night, finding no rest either of soul or body. But while a few were praying for her in the morning, God deliver­ed her out of her distress.

Frid. 12. We had fresh occasion to observe the darkness which was fallen on many who lately rejoiced in God. But he did not long hide his face from them. On Wednesday the spirit of many revived: on Thurs­day evening many more found him in whom they had believed, to be a present help in time of trouble. And never do I remember the power of God to have been more eminently present than this morning: when a cloud of witnesses declared his breaking the gates of brass, and smiting the bars of iron in sunder.

Yet I could not but be under some concern, with regard to one or two persons, who were tormented in an unaccountable manner, and seemed to be indeed lunatic as well as sore vexed. But while I was musing, what would be the issue of these things, the answer I received from the word of God was, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good-will to­wards men.

Soon after I was sent for to one of those, who was so strangely torn by the devil, that I almost wondered her relations did not say, "Much religion hath made thee mad." We prayed God to bruise Satan under [Page 304]her feet. Immediately we had the petition we asked of him. She cried out vehemently, "He is gone, he is gone!" And was filled with the spirit of love and of a found mind. I have seen her many times since, strong in the Lord. When I asked abruptly, "What do you desire now?" She answered, "Heaven." I asked, "What is in your heart?" She replied, "God." I asked, "But how is your heart when any thing pro­vokes you?" She said, "By the grace of God, I am not provoked at any thing. All the things of this world pass by me as shadows." Ye have seen the and of the Lord. Is he not very pitiful and of ten­der mercy?

We had a refreshing meeting at one with many of our society; who fail not to obser [...]e as health permits, the weekly fast of our church, and will do so by God's help, as long as they call themselves members of it. And would to God, all who contend for the rites and ceremonies of the church (perhaps with more zeal than meekness of wisdom) would first shew their own regard for her discipline, in this more important branch of it!

At four I preached near the Fish-ponds (at the de­sire of one who had long laboured under the apprehen­sion of it) on the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost, that is, according to the plain scriptural account, The openly and maliciously asserting, that the miracles of Christ were wrought by the power of the devil.

Sat. 13. I was with one, who being in deep an­guish of spirit, had been the day before to ask a clergyman's advice. He told her, "Her head was out of order, and she must go and take physic." In the evening we called upon God for medicine, to heal those that were broken in heart. And five who had long been in the shadow of death, knew they were passed from death unto life.

[Page 305] The sharp frost in the morning, Sunday 14, did not prevent about 1500, from being at Hannam, to whom I called, in the words of our gracious Master. Come unto me, all ye that are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. In the evening we claimed and received the promise for several who were weary and heavy-laden.

Mond. 15. Upon a pressing invitation, some time since received, I set out for Wales. About four in the afternoon, I preached on a little green, at the foot of the Devauden (a high hill, two or three miles be­yond Chepstow) to three or four hundred plain people, on, Christ our wisdom, righteousness, sanctification and redemption. After sermon, one who I trust is an old disciple of Christ, willingly received us into his house: whither many following, I shewed them their need of a Saviour, from these words, Blessed are the poor in spirit. In the morning I described more fully the way to salvation. Believe in the Lord Jesus, and thou shalt be saved: and then taking leave of my friendly host, before two came to Abergavenny.

I felt in myself a strong aversion to preaching here. However I went to Mr. W — (the person in whose ground Mr. Whitefield preached) to desire the use of it. He said. "With all his heart—if the minister was not willing to let me have the use of the church;" after whose refusal (for I wrote a line to him imme­diately) he invited me to his house. About a thou­sand people stood patiently (though the frost was sha [...]p, it being after sun-set) while from Acts xxviii. 2 [...]. I simply described the plain, old religion of the church of England, which is now almost every where spoken against, under the new name of Me­thodism. An hour after I explained it a little more fully, [...] [...]ighbouring house, shewing how God hath exalted Jesus to be a Prince and a Saviour, to give repent­ance and remission of sins.

[Page 306] Wednes. 15. The [...]rost was sharper than before. However five or six hundred people stayed, while I explained the nature of that salvation which is through faith, yea, faith alone: and the nature of that living faith, through which cometh this salvation. About noon I came to Usk, where I preached to a small com­pany of poor people, on those words, The Son of man is come, to save that which is lost. One grey-headed man wept and trembled exceedingly: and another who was there (I have since heard) as well as two or three who were at the Devauden, are gone quite distracted: that is, they mourn and refuse to be comforted, till they have redemption through his blood.

When I came to Ponty-pool in the afternoon, being unable to procure any more convenient place, I stood in the street, and cried aloud to five or six hundred at­tentive hearers, To believe in the Lord Jesus, that they might be saved. In the evening I shewed his willing­ness to save all who desire to come unto God through him. Many were melted into tears. It may be, that some will bring forth fruit with patience.

Thursd. 18. I endeavoured to cut them off from all false supports and vain dependencies, by explaining and applying that fundamental truth, To him that work­eth not, but believeth on him that justifieth the ungodly, his faith is counted to him for righteousness.

When we were at the Devauden on Monday, a poor woman who lived six miles off, came thither in great heaviness. She was deeply convinced of sin, and wea­ry of it; but found no way to escape from it. She walked from thence to Abergavenny on Tuesday, and on Wednesday from Abergavenny to Usk. Thence in the afternoon she came to Ponty-pool; where be­tween twelve and one in the morning, after a sharp contest in her soul, our Lord got unto himself the victory: and the love of God was shed abroad in her heart, testifying that her sins were forgiven her. She [Page 307]went on her way rejoicing to Cardiff; whither I came in the afternoon. And about five (the minister not being willing I should preach in the church on a week­day) I preached in the Shire-hall (a large convenient place) on Believe and thou shalt be saved. Several were there who laboured much to make a disturbance. But our Lord suffered them not. At seven I explain­ed to a [...]uch more numerous audience, the blessedness of mourning and poverty of spirit. Deep attention sat on the faces of the hearers; many of whom, I trust, have believed our report.

Friday 19. I preached in the morning at New­port, on What must I do to be saved? To the most insensible, ill-behaved people I have ever seen in Wales. One ancient man, during a great part of the sermon, cursed and swore almost incessantly: and towards the conclusion took up a great stone, which he many times attempted to throw. But that he could not do. —Such the champions! Such the arms against field-preaching!

At four I preached at the Shire-hall of Cardiff again, where many gentry, I found were present.

Such freedom of speech I have seldom had, as was given me in explaining those words. The kingdom of God is not meat and drink, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Ghost. At six almost the whole town (I was informed) came together, to whom I explained the six last beatitudes, but my heart was so enlarged, I knew not how to give over, so that we continued three hours. O may the seed they have received, have its fruit unto holiness, and in the end, everlasting life!

Sat. 20. I returned to Bristol. I have seen no part of England so pleasant for sixty or seventy miles together, as those parts of Wales I have been in. And most of the inhabitants are indeed ripe for the gospel. I mean (if the expression appear strange) they [Page 308]are earnestly desirous of being instructed in it: and as utterly ignorant of it they are, as any Creek or Chero­kee Indians. I do not mean they are ignorant of the name of Christ. Many of them can say both the Lord's prayer and the belief. Nay, and some, all the catechism: but take them out of the road of what they have learned by ro [...]e, and they know no more (nine in ten of those with whom I conversed) either of gospel salvation, or of that faith, whereby alone we can be saved, than Chicali or Tomo Chachi. Now, what spirit is he of, who had rather these poor creatures shoule perish for lack of knowledge, than that they should be saved, even by the exhortations of Howel Harris, or an itinerant preacher?

Finding a slackness creeping in among them who had begun to run well, on Sunday 21, both in the morning and afternoon, I enforced those words, As ye have received the Lord Jesus Christ, so walk ye in him. In the evening I endeavoured to quicken them farther, by describing pure and undefiled religion: and the next day, to encourage them in pursuing it, by enforcing those words of our blessed Master, In the world ye shall have tribulation; but be of good cheer: I have overcome the world.

Tues. 23. In riding to Bradford, I read over Mr. Law's book on the new-birth: philosophical, speculative, precarious; Behmenish, void and vain! ‘O what a fall is there!’ At eleven I preached at Bearfield to about three thou­sand, on the nature of the spirit of bondage, and of adoption.

Returning in the evening, I was exceedingly press­ed to go back to a young woman in Kingswood. (The fact I nakedly relate, and leave every man to his own judgment of it.) I went. She was nine­teen [Page 309]or twenty years old, but (it seems) could not write or read. I found her on the bed, two or three persons holding her. It was a terrible sight. An­guish, horror and despair, above all description, ap­peared in her pale face. The thousand distortions of her whole body shewed, how the dogs of hell were gnawing her heart. The shrieks intermixed were scarce to be endured. But her stony eyes could not weep. She screamed out, as soon as words could find their way, "I am damned, damned; lost for ever. Six days ago you might have helped me. But it is past. I am the devil's now. I have given myself to him. His I am. Him I must serve. With him I must go to hell. I will be his. I will serve him. I will go with him to hell. I cannot be saved. I will not be saved. I must, I will, I will be damned." She then began praying to the devil. We began ‘"Arm of the Lord, awake, awake!"’ She immediately sunk down as asleep; but as soon as we left off, broke out again, with inexpressible vehemence, "Stony hearts, break! I am a warning to you. Break, break, poor, stony hearts! Will you not break? What can be done more for stony hearts? I am damned, that you may be saved. Now break, now break poor stony hearts! You need not be damned, though I must." She then fixed her eyes on the corner of the cieling and said, "There he is, ay, there he is, Come, good devil, come. Take me away. You said, you would dash my brains out. Come, do it quickly. I am your's. I will be your's. Come just now. Take me away." We interrupted her by calling again upon God: on which she sunk down as before: and another young woman began to roar out as loud as she had done. My brother now came in, it being about nine o'clock. We continued [Page 310]in prayer till past eleven; when God in a moment spoke peace into the soul, first of the first torment­ed, and then of the other. And they both joined in singing praise to him, who had stilled the enemy and the avenger.

Wed. 24. I preached at Baptist-mills on those words of St. Paul, speaking in the person of one under the law (that is, still carnal, and sold under sin, though groaning for deliverance) I know that in me dwelleth no good thing. A poor woman told me after­wards, I does hope as my husband wont hinder me any more. For I minded he did shiver every bone of him, and the tears ran down his cheeks like the rain. I warned our little society in the evening, To beware of levity, slackness in good works, and despising little things; which had caused many to fall again into bondage.

Thurs. 25. I was sent for to one in Bristol, who was taken ill the evening before. (This fact too I will simply relate, so far as I was an ear, or eye-wit­ness of it.) She lay on the ground furiously gnash­ing her teeth, and after a while roared aloud. It was not easy for three or four persons to hold her, especially when the name of Jesus was named. We prayed; the violence of her symptoms ceased, though without a complete deliverance.

In the evening, being sent for to her again, I was un­willing, indeed afraid to go: thinking it would not avail, unless some who were strong in the faith, were to wrestle with God for her. I opened my testament on those words, I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth. I stood [...]proved and went imme­diately. She began screaming before I came into the room; then broke out into a horrid laughter, mixed with blasphemy, grievous to hear. One who from many circumstances apprehended a preter-natural agent to be concerned in this, asking, "How didst thou dare to enter into a Christian?" Was answered, "She is [Page 311]not a Christian. She is mine." Q. "Dost thou not tremble at the name of Jesus?" No words followed, but she shrunk back and trembled exceedingly. Q. "Art thou not increasing thy own damnation?" It was answered faintly, "Ay, ay:" which was followed by fresh cursing and blaspheming.

My brother coming in, she cried out, "Preacher! Field-preacher! I do not love field-preaching." This was repeated two hours together, with spitting and all the expressions of strong aversion.

We left her at twelve, but called again about noon, on Friday 27. And now it was that God sheweth, he heareth prayer. All her pangs ceased in a moment. She was filled with peace, and knew that the son of wickedness was departed from her.

Saturday 28. I was sent for to Kingswood again, to one of those who had been so ill before. A violent rain began just as I set out, so that I was thoroughly wet in a few minutes. Just at that time the woman (then three miles off) cried out, "Yonder comes Wesley, galloping as fast as he can." When I was come, I was quite cold and dead, and fitter for sleep than prayer She burst out into a horrid laughter and said, "No power, no power; no faith, no faith. She is mine. Her [...] is mine. I have her and will not let her go."

We begged of God to increase our faith. Mean while her pangs increased more and more: so that o [...] would have imagined, by the violence of the throes, her body must have been shattered to pieces. One who was clearly convinced this was no [...] dis­order, said, "I think, Satan is let loose. I fear, he will not stop here." And added, "I command thee, in the name of the Lord Jesus, [...] tell if thou hast commission to torment any other soul?" It was im­mediately answered, "I have. L—y C—r, and [Page 312]S—h J—s." (Two who lived at some distance, and were then in perfect health.)

We betook ourselves to prayer again, and ceased not, till she began, about six o'clock, with a clear voice, and composed, chearful look, ‘"Praise God from whom all blessings flow!"’

Sund. 28. I preached once more at Bradford at one in the afternoon. The violent rains did not hin­der more, I believe, than ten thousand, from earnestly attending to what I spoke on those solemn words, I take you to record this day, that I am pure from the blood of all men. For I have not shunned to declare unto you all the counsel of God.

Returning in the evening, I called at Mrs. J—'s in Kingswood. S—y J—s and L—y C—v were there. It was [...] a quarter of an hour [...] be­fore L—y C—r fell into a str [...]nge agony, and presently after, S—y J—s. The violent [...] all over their bodies, were such as words cannot de­scribe. Their cries and groans were too horrid to be borne: till one of them in a tone not to be expressed, said, "Where is your faith now? Come, go to pray­ers. I will pray with you. Our Father which art in heaven." We took the advice, from whomsoever [...] came, and [...] out our souls before God, till L—y C—r's agonies so increased, that it seem­ed she was in the pangs of death. But in a moment God spoke; she knew his voice, and both her body and soul wer [...] healed.

We continued in prayer till near one, when S— [...]—'s voice was also changed, and she began strong­ly to call upon God. This she did for the greatest part of the night. In the morning we renewed our [...]rayers, while she was crying continually, "I burn, I burn; O what shall I do? I have a fire within [Page 313]me. I cannot bear it. Lord Jesus! Help!" Amen, Lord Jesus! When thy time is come.

Wednes. 31. I strongly enforced on those who ima­gine they believe, and do not, As the body without the spirit is dead, so saith without works is dead also. The power of God was in an unusual manner present at the meeting of the bands in the evening. Six or seven were deeply convinced of their unfaithfulness to God, and two filled again with his love. But poor Mary W— remained as one without hope. Her soul refused comfort. She could neither pray herself, nor bear to hear us. At last she cried out, Give me the book and I will sing. She began giving out line by line (but with such an accent as art could never reach.)

Here we were obliged to interrupt her; we again betook ourselves to prayer, and her heart was eased, though not set at liberty.

Thurs. Nov. 1. I set out and the next evening came to Reading, where a little company of us met in the [...], at which the zealous mob was so enraged, they were ready to tear the house down. Therefore I hope God has a work to do in this place. In thy time let it be fulfilled.

About this time I received a letter from the author of those reflections which I mentioned July 31. An extract of which I have subjoined.