THE LIFE and CHARACTER OF Mrs. MARY LLOYD.
THERE is so irresistible a Charm in undissembled Vertue, that there are but few, who do not profess to admire its Excellence: —Something so shocking in the naked Deformity of Vice, that the most corrupt Minds are ashamed to own their Attachment to it. But when Men are exhorted, to regulate their Lives by the sacred Precepts of Religion, how apt are they to look upon it as a vain and impracticable Attempt; and complain that it offers Violence to Human Nature, by laying an unreasonable Restraint upon the Appetites of [Page 2] Flesh and Blood. To remove these groundless Prejudices, the inspired Scriptures set before us, the bright Cloud of antient Witnesses, who have shone as Lights a dark and degenerate World; and earnestly invite us to be Followers of them, who thro' Faith and Patience inherit the Promises. And perhaps, nothing affords greater Encouragement to serious Minds, than to find that Men of like Passions, placed in the same dangerous Circumstances, and surrounded with equal Trials and Temptations, have, by the Assistance of divine Grace, bravely conquered the Difficulties of the Christian Life, and ran with Patience the Race set before them. This shows us, that Religion is not a bare abstracted Theory, contrived for the Entertainment of speculative Minds; but is an undoubted Reality, of which many of our Fellow-Creatures have felt the transforming Power in their Hearts; and exemplified in an amiable and vertuous Conduct. This has the highest Tendency to encourage others, to imitate those instructive Patterns, who in their Day were illustrious Ornaments of the Church, and diffusive Blessings to Mankind. Upon this Account, the Lives of eminent Saints, have always been esteemed the most valuable, Part of Ecclesiastical [Page 3] History. In this Way, they have spoke to Survivors, even when sleeping in the Silence of Death, and extended the Influence of their Piety, to distant Places, and thro' succeeding Ages.
THERE is a public Honour due to Persons of dishnguish'd Worth: Whilst they live, we cannot publish their Vertues, without exposing them to the dangerous Temptation of Pride, and ourselves to the Imputation of a servile and designing Flattery. But when they are removed from this Stage of Vanity, and raised above the Censure or Applause of Mortals, we may safely propose their lovely Patterns, to the Attention and Imitation of Posterity. And indeed, it would be an Injury to Mankind, to suffer their superior Qualities, to lie buried in perpetual Oblivion; and those Names which God has dignified by his Grace, to perish without any Mark of Distinction. When they are ascended above these Regions of Guilt and Darkness, and are entered into the General Assembly of the Church of the First-born, it becomes us who are still confined to this Vale of Tears, and fighting under the Banner of the Cross, to perpetuate the Remembrance of their Vertues, and [Page 4] ardently aspire after that State of Purity and Perfection, to which they are advanced.
ALL who had the Happiness of Mrs. LLOYD's Acquaintance, will be so just as to acknowledge, that in the present Age there have appeared, but few more excellent Examples of genuine Piety, and extensive Usefulness. Her Friends will be pleased, to have those extraordinary Qualities, placed in a proper Light, which rendered her their Delight and Admiration, while living, and will embalm her Memory, now she is dead. Strangers to her, may also from a Perusal of these Pages, be excited to despise the Pomps and Venities of Life; which are unworthy the Pursuit of a rational Creature; and to seek after those Endowments, which add a real Dignity to Human Nature, and prepare for a superior State of Existence.
THESE Considerations have determined me, tho' in all respects unequal to the Task, to give some Account of her Life and Character. The Reader must not expect a pompous Detail of Facts, diversified with a Variety of entertaining Incidents. — She maintained one uniform Tenor of Devotion to the Supreme Being, and diligent [Page 5] Attendance to the Duties of Common Life. She never affected a public Appearance beyond the Decency of her Station; not interfered with Affairs, foreign to her Sex. This will necessarily cut short the Historical Part of the following Performance. I shall principally enlarge upon her Character, which cannot, without the extremest Injustice, be confined in a very narrow Compass.
MRS. LLOYD was born at BOSTON, in NEW-ENGLAND. May 1681, of a good Family; being the only Child of Mr. John Clarke and Mrs. Mary Atwater. Her Father, a Commander of a Vessel, was, in her Infancy, carried into Captivity by the Corsairs of Barbary, who to this Day infest the Mediteranean Sea, and are the common Enemies of the trading Nations of Europe. These Barbarians generally use those who are so unfortunate as to fall into their Hands, with the greatest Cruelty: But Capt. Clarke being a Gentleman of Ingenuity and Address, met with uncommon Civility, and was exempted from that servile Drudgery to which most of their Prisoners are condemned. Here he was seized with that fatal Distemper, the SmallPox, of which he died in a few Days. — Her Mother was a Woman of superior Piety [Page 6] and, good Sense, and lived to the Age of Sixty three, in Honour and Usefulness. She was endued, with great Prudence; managed her houshold Affairs with the justest Economy, and supported the Afflictions of Life with Patience and Resignation. She was familiar with the Thoughts of Death, even in her highest Health, and made it her principal Business to prepare for that important Event. When she felt its first Approaches, she received it not as the King of Terrors, but as a Messenger of Joy —the Angel of her Deliverance. ‘The Blessed Day, (says she) is come, which I have been so long expecting and preparing for.’ — And in a few Hours expired in the greatest Tranquility and Peace.
THIS Gentlewoman, after Capt, Clarke's early Departure, continued several Years a disconsolate Widow. Afterwards she married Mr. John Coney; who always treated Mrs. Lloyd with the Affection and Tenderness of a Father. Under his Roof, she enjoyed all the Opportunities she could desire, to improve in Knowledge and Vertue; and to obtain those other Qualifications, which were suitable to her Sex and Character. She had equal Advantages with his own Children: [Page 7] I have often heard her say, that if at any Time a Distinction was made, it was generally in her Favour. She always spoke of this uncommon Generosity, with the greatest Thankfulness, and paid this worthy Gentleman, while he lived, all the Offices of FilialPiety. After his Death, she never mentioned his Name, without some singular Mark of Gratitude and Respect.
IN this agreeable Situation, Mrs. Lloyd passed the Days of her Youth; and by her vertuous, obliging Behaviour, recommended herself to the good Opinion of all who knew her. The Royal Preacher tells us, that Childhood and Youth are Vanity; and melancholly Observation shows, that this beautiful Season of Life is generally lavished away in Amusements, if not spent in an entire Forgetfulness of God, and the great End of our Being. But perhaps, never was any Person freer from the common Follies incident to Youth, than Mrs. Lloyd. The Principles of the divine Life, seemed to display themselves with the first Dawning of Reason. She often said, that she never knew the Time, when she began to be serious. From her very Infancy, she discovered a deep Abhorrence of every Vice, and an earnest Solicitude to [Page 8] devote herself to the Service of her Maker. From a Child, she read the Scriptures with unusual Delight,— observed her stated Hours of Retirement,— and took Pleasure to associate herself with Persons of Eminence in Religion.
BUT, not with standing the Happiness of an unblemished Youth; She, in the early Years of Life, fell under a deep Conviction of her Guilt and Misery; and was, for many Months, anxiously solicitous for her immortal Welfare. She found no Rest, but at the Footstool of sovereign and unmerited Grace; — no Safety, but in a fiducial Application, to the Merits and Mediation of Jesus Christ. All her Days, she had the highest Relish for those Doctrines, which have the most apposite Tendency to humble the Pride of human Nature,— exalt the Riches of divine Grace,—and ascribe the entire Glory of Salvation to a crucified Redeemer.
THE Beauty, of her Person,—the Sprightliness of her Wit, — the Charms of her Conversation, but above all, the unfeigned Piety which crowned her other Accomplishments, soon procured her many Admirers. She had several advantageous Offers, of a [Page 9] Settlement in the married Life. She fixed her Choice upon the Revd. Mr. Ebenezer Pemberton, Pastor of a flourshing Church in BOSTON; and one of the most celebrated Preachers of his Age. To this Gentleman she was married in the Year 1701. They lived together with mutual Delight and Satisfaction, till the Year 1717; when their Marriage Relation was dissolved, by the Death of Mr. Pemberton. They had seven Children: Three of which died in their Infancy; Four, thro' the good Providence of God, yet survive. May we be Heirs of that Grace which so eminently resided in our departed Parents, and follow them in their exemplary Course of Vertue!—Then, we shall shortly meet them again, in that blessed World, where will be no more Sorrow, Seperation, or Death!
THE indulgent Reader will allow me to shed a few Tears over the Grave of so excellent a Father; who [...] instruction and Example I lost, before [...] an Opportunity, to know their [...] and Advantage. I shall not attempt his Character:—I am happily prevented by the Sermons occasioned by his Death, preached by the Revd. Drs. Colman and Sewall. His own printed Discourses [Page 10] show, he had all the Qualifications requisite to constitute a great and a good Man. The masterly Reasoner,—the judicious Divine,—the servant Preacher,—the accomplished Orator, appear in almost every Page of his Writings. He spent his Life in the most assidous Labours, to enlarge and support the Kingdom of his Master. He died in the full Assurance of Faith, in triumphant Views of eternal Felicity. This was the Language of his faultring Tongue, in his expiring Moments, ‘I thank God, who hath given me a good Hope thro' Christ. Notwithstanding my many Infirmities, both in public and private; thro' his Grace I have been enabled to be sincere and upright before him. And I can now look for an House not made with Hands, eternal in the Heavens, when this House of my earthly Tabernacle is dissolved. And this Hope is built only on the Merits of Christ, who hath suffered so much for me; who died, and is riser again, and lives for ever, to make Intercession for me. And upon this Foundation is built, my Hope for my self, my Family, my Church, and the whole Israel of God: And I thank God, who hath enabled me, in a dying Hour, to express this my Hope.’
[Page 11]THIS Loss must doubtless be very heavy to Her, who for many Years had been united with him, in the most delightful Society, and resin'd Friendship. Her tender and affectionate Nature, was ready to sink under the severe Trial. But, she was enabled to glorify God, in the Height of her Affliction; and exhibit to all around, an instructive Example of Christian Patience, and profound Submission, to the Will of her heavenly Father.
IN her Widowhood, as soon as her Circumstances would permit, she entered upon a retired Scene of Life; that she might with greater Freedom, converse with Heaven, and inspect the Education of her Children; who were now left under her immediate Direction. Perhaps, none ever manifested a more solicitous Concern for the Felicity of their Offspring, than Mrs. Lloyd; or, more incessantly travelled in Birth, that Christ might be formed in them. She lodged many an ardent Petition in the Court of Heaven, on their Behalf; and daily recommended them to the Grace of our Almighty Saviour. She requested nothing for them, with a passionate Importunity, but a Union to Christ, as their living Head; and an Admission into [Page 12] the Number of his redeemed People. She rejoiced, to see them increase in Knowledge,—appear with a just Decorum, upon the Stage of Life,—and comfortably settled in the World. But she knew, these were poor and precarious Advantages, insufficient to satisfy the boundless Appetites of an intelligent and immortal Spirit. To obtain for Herself, and Posterity, the Favour of an unchangeable GOD, and an Intrest in that everlasting Covenant, in all Things well ordered and sure, was the Height of her Ambition. If this was secured, she was perswaded they would be happy in Prosperity and Adversity,—in Sickness and Health,—in Life and Death. Therefore, she instilled into their tender Minds, the good Knowledge of the Lord: And as they grew up to Years of Discretion, by the most gentle and attractive Methods of Perswasion, strove to engage them to dedicate their Youth, to the Service of God; and sedulously to avoid those Irregularities, by which the Morning of Life, is so frequently darkned and defiled.
SHE continued a Widow several Years; employing her Time, in Exercises of Devotion—the necessary Cares, of her Family,—and the Offices of Friendship. Afterwards, she married Johns Campbell, Esq; a Gentleman. [Page 13] of good Character, and in plentiful Circumstances: Who proved an affectionate Husband to Her, and an indulgent Father to her Children. He lived but a few Years after this Marriage; and died in a peaceful and honourable old Age.
AFTER a suitable Interval, she married Henry Lloyd, Esq; of the Manor of Queen's Village, in the Province of NEW-YORK. With him she lived in uninterrupted Harmony and Friendship, upwards of twenty Years. She now entered upon a Scene of Life entirely new. Hitherto she had dwelt in a populous Town, among her Relations, and surrounded with a large and delightful Acquaintance. But upon her Marriage with Mr. Lloyd, she removed into a distant Province, to the retired Solitudes of a rural Life. She accommodated herself to this Change of Circumstances, with great Propriety and Decency; and in the calm Retreat, enjoyed the Blessings of Peace and Plenty, and an Opportunity of improving, in those devout Exercises, which had always been the Joy and Solace of her Life. But tho' she was, in a great Measure, removed from the Society and Amusements of the World, yet, she did not fly its important and necessary Business. [Page 14] In her, Mr. Lloyd found an agreeable Companion,—his Children, an affectionate Mother,—his Servants, an indulgent Mistress—, his Tenants, a kind and beneficent Friend; who rejoiced in their Prosperity,—sympathized with them, in their Sorrows,—relieved them, in their Wants,—and was never easy, but when performing fome charitable and benevolent Action. She soon became acquainted with the Affairs of the Country, and engaged in them with Alacrity and Vigour. She managed a numerous Family, with the exactest Economy; and treated Mr. Lloyd's Children with the same Tenderness and Affection, as if they had been her own.
So amiable a Conduct, must certainly highly, endear her, to all who were so happy as to be related to her. Accordingly, the Family, in which her Lot was now cast, showed her uncommon Respect; and were sensible, that in her, they received a great and extensive Blessing.
IN this solitary, but pleasant Retirement, she managed her Time in the most useful Manner; looking well to the Affairs of her Houshold, and spending her remaining Hours, in Prayer, Meditation, and other religious Exercises;
[Page 15] DEATH, she kept continually in View; and so numbered her Days, as to prepare for that decisive Moment, on which is suspended an Eternity of Happiness or Misery. Her constant Concern, was to act her Part upon the Stage of Life, well; to the Acceptance of her Judge; and to finish her Course with Joy. She was naturally of a tender and delicate Constitution; but was favoured with an unusual Degree of Health, for a Woman of her advanced Years. For some Time before her Death, she perceived a Feebleness of Nature, gradually increasing upon her; and often said. ‘The Lamp of Life is almost expired!’—but still maintained her Activity, and Sprightliness of Temper. She spoke of Death with an Air of Pleasure; and seemed to wait, with earnest, Desire, a peaceful Dismission to eternal Rest. The Day before she died, she was in good Health; and in the Evening, supped and conversed with her family and Friends, with her accustomed Chearfulness. She retired, and spent some Time in reading the Rev. Mr. Hervey's Meditations; — a Book she greatly admired for its sublime Thoughts, elevated Piety, and splendid Diction. There is something so striking in some of the last Lines she read in that admirable Performance; [Page 16] and so surprizingly adapted to the Scenes of Providence, which were before her, that I cannot forbear transcribing them. * She went to Bed, at her wonted Hour, without any apparent Symptoms of approaching Disorder; and soon fell into a calm Sleep. About two o'Clock, she awaked; and in a few Minutes, complained that she wanted Breath; and asked for a Dose of Elixir, which used to relieve her in her Faintness. It was ready at Hand, and brought immediately: She drank [Page 17] it down, and that Moment expired,—without a Groan or Struggle; Novenrber 10. 1749. Thus, she passed from the gentle Slumbers of Nature, to the final Sleep of Death:—At once, changed a dark and disordered World, for the transporting Abodes of Light and Joy;—without experiencing those melancholly Scenes of Sickness and Pain,—the usual Attendants of a dying Bed!
A SUDDEN Death is the Object of universal Dread. And certainly, nothing can be a more affecting Spectacle than to behold gay unthinking Creatures, removed in a Moment, from the tumultuous Hurries of the World, and the defiling Pleasure of Sin, to the enlightned Tribunal of God; where they must receive an irrevocable Sentence, according to the Deeds done in the Body. With the fastest Reason, do the greatest Part of Mankind pray, ‘From sudden Death, good Lord, deliver us;’ for t'hey waste their Days in a fatal Forgetfulnes of their latter End: And if the mortal summons surprizes them unawares, it surely finds them unprepared for the momentous Change. But to the humble, the watchful Christian, who stands with his Loins girt, and Lamp burning, the most sudden Death can be no Disadvantage:—The [Page 18] sooner the inevitable Arrest is executed, the easier his Passage to the Regions of unmolested Repose.
WHAT can be more desirable, than to be removed at once, from the fading Comforts of Earth, to the unwithering Joys of Heaven!—One Hour, prostrate at the Footstool of Grace; groaning under a body of Sin and Death;—the next, standing before the Throne of God; adorned with the shining Glories of complete Salvation!—One Moment in the Bosom of our earthly Friends;—the next, united to the blissful Society of Angels, and the general Assembly of the Spirits of just Men made perfect!—Glorious Transition!—not to be deplored as a Misfortune; but congratulated as a distinguishing Happiness!—When we have finished our appointed Time upon Earth, and we are ready for a Removal to an everlasting Habitation, it is a Favour to be delivered from the common Agonies of dissolving Nature, and excused the sad Solemnity of bidding Adieu to out Acquaintance and Friends.
BESIDES what may be learned of Mrs. Lloyd's Character, from the proceeding Account; Justice to her uncommon Merit; and [Page 19] a Regard to the Edification of Survivors, demand that I enlarge a little farther, on those various Excellencies, which rendered her so useful in Life, and so much lamented at Death.
HER Aspect way lovely, serene and pleasant. She spoke in a graceful Manner, in soft and flowing Language. The Politeness of her Address, the Vivacity of her Conversatiorn, joined to the Benevolence of her Disposition, captivated all Companies; and made Persons of every Rank, fond of cultivating her Acquantance.
HER intellectual Faculties were vastly beyond the common Level: A penetrating Understanding; a sprightly Fancy; a tenacious Memory; a clear and happy Expression, raised her above the greatest Part of the Sex; more than any of those glittering Distinctions, upon which they are apt inordinately to doat.
But, Mrs. Lloyd was sensible that the Charms of Wit and Beauty, if not improved in the Service of Heaven, only render Persons more exquisitely base and miserable. It was therefore her most solicitous Care, to have her Breast animated with the Love and [Page 20] Fear of God; and her Life governed by the Precepts of Religion. And perhaps, few ever acted more uniformly under is influence, than the Person we are speaking of. She thought, spoke, and lived, as One that set the Lord always before her, and retained an abiding Sense of his Love. She began the Day with God, and rose early that she might have a calm uninterrupted Opportunity for the Offices of Devotion. No Hurry of Business,—no Diversion of Company,—no Avocation of Life, were suffered to exclude her stated Hours of Meditation and Prayer: These, she attended, not as an appointed' Task imposed upon her; but always returned to them, with Eagerness, as the most refreshiing and honourble Employment. How she improved her Time, is fully known only by HIM to whom those sacred Hours were consecrated. Her private Manuscripts plainly show, they were spent in the most pious and profitable Manner;—adoring the AUTHOR, of her Being,—resigning herself afresh to the SAVIOUR of Mankind,—meditating on divine Subjects,—strengthening her Resolutions to live to God, and the Designs of his Glory,—and earnestly imploring the almighty Aids of the Spirit; without which she was sensible, she could do nothing spiritually good.
[Page 21]HER Piety was not confined to the Closet, but directed, animated and supported her, thro' all the business of the Day. To obey the Comamds of her Maker,—to submit to the unerring Disposals of Heaven,—to maintain a happy Serenity of Mind, amidst the various Vicissitudes of Life,—to resist the Terrors and Allurements of an ensharing World,—was her constant unremitted Endeavour:
SHE read much;—but had not Taste for any Thing, but what had an evident Tendency to make Mankind wiser or better. Books of meer Amusement, she seldom cared to meddle with, esteeming Time too precious, to be trisled away is Vanity. Treatises of practical Divinity,she read with a peculiar Relish. Those Writings, which were best calculated to inspire her with a humble Sense of the Vileness and Corruption of Human Nature; and give her exalted Views of the wonderful Love of God, in the mysterious Work of Redemption,—were what, she principally valued and studied. But above all, the BOOK of GOD, was that in which she took the greatest Delight. This she made here her constant, Friend and Cousellor,—the Guide of her Youth,—the Companion of [Page 22] her Solitude,—and the Support of her declining Age. She read the sacred Pages, and other religious Tracts, not so much to encrease her speculative Knowledge, and gratify the Inclinations of an inquisitive Mind; as to learn the self-denying Mysteries of the Cross of CHRIST,— detach her Affections from the Creature, and unite them more vigorously to the ORIGINAL SOURCE of Perfection and Blessedness.
THE Lord's Day was indeed to her, an holy Sabbath of Rest; entirely consecrated to the Exercises of Piety, Devotion, and Charity. She retired from the unnecessary Affairs of Life; and took Care that her Domestics might not be encumbered with Business, but have Leisure to pay their Homage to that BEING, whom all Ranks of Men are equally bound to adore and obey. No trifling Disourse,—no unprofitable, Amusements were permitted in her Presence. A chearful and composed Gravity,—a profound Silence and Solemnity, appeared in all her Conduct, on the Christian Sabbath; except she found a convenient Occasion, to introduce a Conversation upon religious Subjects, for the Instruction and Edification of the Company. Those sacred Hours were [Page 23] employed, as a delightful Preparation for that ETERNAL SABBATH, which remains for the People of GOD, in a future World. She naturalized herself, before hand, to the Duties and Exercises, the Manners and Customs of the heavenly State.
WHILE she lived in BOSTON, no flight Indisposition,—no Inclemencies of Weather, detained her from the Assemblies of the Saints. And after her Removal into the Country, tho' the Place of Workship was several Miles distant from her Abode, she gave her constant Attendance, unless the Weather was so tempestuous, as evidently to endanger her Health, and those who waited upon her. How she behaved in the Temple of God, was visible to Multitude, who were at once reproved and edified by her humble and reverent Example. There was nothing careless and negligent, or formal and affected in her Behaviour, during divine Service. She joined in the publick Prayers with Fervency and Devotion; and attended to the pious Instractions, deliver'd from the Pulpit, with the closest Appication. 'Throughout the whole Solemnity, she was all Ear!—all Attentions! Her Eyes were fix'd, and Heart intent upon the important [Page 24] Transaction. A careless Look,—an inattentive the Negligence,— a ceremonious Complaisance; she esteemed the highest Absurdity; when appearing in the more immediate Presence of our Maker, and hearing the Words of eternal Life.
SHE was a constant Communicant from her Youth; and expressed the highest Veneration for that solemn Institution, which our blessed Lord recommended to his Church with his dying Breath. She received the confecrated Elements, with an ardent Desire after that Bread of Life, by which alone, our Souls can be preserved in spiritual Health and Vigour. The lively Image of a crucified Savour, and the astonishing Wonders of his Love to apostate Sinners, exhibited in that Ordinance, made the most affectionate Impressions upon her Heart; and often filled her with Transports of grateful Joy.
But tho' Mrs. Lloyd appropriated much of her Time to Devotion and Retirement, yet she made this no Excuse, to exempt her from the common Duties of Life. She descended from the Mount, with a serene Composure, and chearful Disposition, to engage in every necessary Employment [Page 25] Idleness, she accounted peculiarly criminal in those, whom GOD has distinguish'd with a larger Share, than common, of the Gifts of Nature and Providence. The Business of every Day was prosecuted in its proper Season with a Liveliness and Vigour, that animated and encouraged all around her. She thought it no Burden, but Privilege, to fill up every vacant Space, with something that mighty be improving to herself, or instructive to others. Her constant Appliplication to the Duties of Religion, created no Distance or Reserve in her Behaviours Her Conversation was easy, natural, and pleasant. She was chearful without Levity,—grave without Affectation—condescending to the meanest,—obliging and helpful to ALL.
IT has been objected to Persons eminent in Religion, that they are apt to be severe in their Censures; and take an ill-natur'd Pride in reflecting upon the Conduct of others. This, whenever it appears, is a great Blemish to Religion; and an unfailing Evidence, that the Persons to whom it is justly imputed, have made but a superficial Progress in the Christian Life, and are under the predominant Influence of a proud self-righteous Spirit.
[Page 26]Mrs. LLOYD was remarkably distant from any Thing of this Nature. She knew the Christian Doctrine was designed, not only to enkindle in our Breasts, a sacred Flame of Love to God; but to inspire us, with Sentiments of universal Benevolence to Mankind. The Sanctity of her Life, was adorned with the tenderest Condescention to the Weakness and Infirmities of others: She enlarged, with Pleasure, upon their Vertues; and made the handsomest Apologies for their unguarded Follies. Nothing but abandon'd Vice could provoke her to speak with Severity; and thro' an Excess of Charity would fain discover something praise-worthy even in the worst of Characters: An Air of Displeasure appeared in her Countenance, whenever an ill-natur'd or envious Reflection was made in her Presence. With all the Warmth of Friendship, she defended the absent, tho' perhaps a distant Stranger. To sport with the Reputation of our Neighbour,—to expose and aggravate his Faults, she esteem'd the most ungenerous Conduct;—not only a direct Opposition to the Precepts of the Gospel; but a plain Violation of the Laws of civil Society. When Scandal and Detraction were the Subject of Conversation, where she was obliged to be present; she always testified her Displeasure; [Page 27] either with an open Rebuke, or, where this was improper, with a melancholly and forbidding Silence.
HER superior Knowledge,— communicative Disposition,—and constant Good-Nature, made her Conversation highly agreeable. She talked upon every innocent and useful Subject with great Sprightliness and Freedom; but could never bear a prophane Jest, or malicious Satire, tho' cloathed in the fairest Dress, and adorned with the Charms of Wit and Politeness.
RELIGION was her favourite Topic, which she introduced upon every proper Occasion, and endeavored to set in an amiable Lights, in order to recommend it, to the Esteem and Affection of all her Acquaintance. She had a deep Sense of the Baseness and Misery, that attend a vicious State; and was earnestly desirous to rescue all, to whom she had Access, from its uneasy and disgraceful Bondage. She spoke in the most elevated Language of the Glories of redeeming Grace; and recommended an ALL-SUFFICIENT SAVIOURS, with all the Beauties of Perswasion and Eloquence. None came into her Company, but she endeavoured to inspire them with a Detestation [Page 28] of Vice, and assist them in the Practice of the sublimest Degrees of Piety: Out of the good Treasure of her Heart, she brought forth Things new and old, for their Instruction and Entertainment. She was attended to with uncommon Delight; and few left her Company, without sensible Regret. She possessed in Perfection the happy Art of turning the Conversation, from Things of a trisling and indifferent Nature, to those that were important and profitable. She easily ascended from the Earth to Hevaven—from the Flowers of the Field, to the Beauties of Paradise,—from the common Transactions of Life, to the momentous Affairs of Eternity:—From the daily Occurrences of Providence, she formed insructive Lessons of Prudence and Piety.
SHE had no Taste for those Diversions, in which the fashionable and polite Part of Mankind too often spend the most valuable Part of their Time. In the Exercises of Devotion, she found a perpetual Spring of sublime and satisfying Pleasures, and the noblest Support under the unavoidable Trials and Afflictions of Life. A firm Perswasion of the everlasting Love of God,—an unshaken Trust in the Righteousness of our almighty Saviour,—the Testimony of a good Conscience [Page 29] —and a joyful Expectation of heavely Happiness, inclined her to look down with a generous Disdain on all he assuring Vanities of the World; and to aspire after Nothing but the highest Degrees of Preparation for the Inheritance of the Saints in Light.
THO' she was naturally of a warm and lively Temper; yet she kept her Passions under the most absolute Command, and was always serene, composed, and chearful. Those displeasing Accidents, which often raise a sudden Tempest of Anger, even in the Breast of good Men, hardly ever ruffled the Tranquility of her Mind. Upon the greatest personal Provocations, she never allowed an indecent Word; nor betrayed an unjustifiable Resentment. If ever she expressed herself with Warmth and Vehemence, it was in the Cause of Heaven and flow'd from a commendable Zeal against Opinions and Practices, which she thought destructive to pure and undefiled Religion.
NOT that she was inflamed with a bitter Spirit, aginst Persons of different Sentiments in Religion. She loved good Men of all Perswasions; and reverenced real Religion, in whatsoever Communication she found it. All [Page 30] who were animated with the Love of God,—maintain'd the essential Truths of Christianity and adorned their Profession by an holy Conversation, she embraced with a cordial Respect, without Regard to Party-Names, or Distinctions.
SHE was a warm Advocate for what are generally stiled the Doctrines of Grace. She was firmly perswaded, they had the greatest Tendency, to exalt the Glory of God; and afforded the highest Encouragement to perishing apostate Sinners; and were upon all Accounts calculated to promote the Comfort and Holiness of the Church of Christ, She therefore openly appeared in their Favour, and defended them when misrepresented and opposed by Persons of a different Way of thinking. But she had too deep a Sense of the Weakness of human Nature, and the Strength of the Prejudices of Education, rashly to pronounce an Anathema meerly on the Account of a Diversity of Opinion, in these mysterious Points. Her Zeal against Error was accompanied with a Tenderness to the Erroneous. She treated their Persons, with Kindness and Condescension; and prayed that they might be brought to the Acknowledgment of the Truth!
[Page 31]CHARITY was her darling Vertue, which she exercised. with peculiar Delight and Satisfaction; and desired as she had Opportunity, to do good unto all Men. Her benevolent Spirit was not circumscribed within the Bounds of any divided Communion; but extended to all Mankind, without Distinction of, Parties. It seemed her uninterrupted Study, to perform generous and beneficent Actions to all, within the Circle of her Acquaintance,—even beyond her Ability. She knew no other Use of Money, but to assist her Friends in their Difficulties, and relieve the Poor in their Indigence. She was always uneasy, if any left her House, without receiving some valuable Token of her Kindness. To do obliging Things, was the genuine Propensity of her Soul, and one of the most refin'd Pleasures of her Life. The Value of the Gift, was heightned by the kind engaging Manner in which it was conferr'd. Her Generosity was never extorted by Importunity, nor dispensed with Regret. Misery and Want always excited her compassionate Regard; and engaged her to use her utmost Efforts to remove them. She joyfully embraced every Opportunity to diffuse Happiness to all around her; and in the Peace and Satisfaction of her Mind, experienced the Truth [Page 32] of that Maxim of our Blessed Lord, It is more blessed to give than to receive. She condescended to the lowest Offices, that she might do good to Mankind; visited the Poor in their Sickness; provided for their Support; and by her wise religious Counsels assisted them to make a suitable Improvement of their Affliction.
NO Wonder such Assemblage of Vertues, so many lovely Qualities, rendered her the Delight of her Fiends; and overwhelmed them with Grief, at her sudden and unexpected Removal. Tho' she had passed the Threshold of Old Age; yet the Regularity of her Conduct, her exact Temperance in Diet, and the Vivacity, of her Temper, which continued to the last; encouraged us to hope for a much longer Enjoyment of so valuable a Life.
I AM, sensible, than in this Account to do Justice to her Memory, I have fallen much short of what her extraordinary Merit deserves. Her Friends will be able to add many beautiful Particulars, to those here enumerated. I have given a faint, but true Resemblance of her Character and Conduct; tho' not with that Life and Propriety, which the Excellency [Page 33] of my Subject requires. We value the Pourtrait of a departed Friend, if like the Original, tho' not drawn by the most skillful Hand.
I SHALL only add a few Words relating to the following Papers. They were all written for her own private Use; and undoubtedly never designed for public View. But when upon her lamented Death, they fell into my Hands, I thought them too valuable a Treasure to be concealed from the World. I have therefore selected, such of her Manuscripts, as I imagined, might be of most general Use; and am perswaded they will afford Instruction and Delight to a serious and devout Mind.
THE Reader must not expect any labour'd Criticisms, deep Reasonings, or rhetorical Flourishes. It cannot be expected, that a Gentlewoman, who was daily busied in the Cares of a numerous Family, could be acquainted with scholastic Niceties, and the modern Refinments of Method and Stile. The following Collection speaks the undisguised Language of her Heart. She talks of divine Things, in that familiar and affecting Manner, in which they appeared to her, in her devout, Retirements. They contain some of the secret [Page 34] Transactions between God, and her own Soul, when she was more solicitous to regulate the Disposition of her Mind, than to model her Thoughts according to the Rules of Art, and express them in the Beauties of Diction. But I am perswaded, they contain such sublime Sentiments of Piety; such a sared Fervour of Devotion; that the indulgent Reader will easily excuse any slight Inaccuracies, which [...] critical Eye may observe.
[Page]MEDITATIONS ON Divine SUBJECTS.
MEDITATION I.
Upon the TRUTH of the CHRISTIAN RELIGION; and, an Enquiry into the State of my own Soul.
O MY ever glorious and gracious God, and heavenly Father in Jesus Christ! I read in the sacred Oracles of Truth, that Thou didst so love the World, as to give thine only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him, should not perish, but have everlasting Life;—and that this Life is in thy Son—Thou hast also borne Testimony, that JESUS is thy beloved Son, in whom thou [Page 36] art well pleased;—that those who believe thy Testimony have set to their Seal, that God is true;—but they that believe not, have made God a Liar. I therefore importunately pray, That thou wouldest bestow on me, that Faith by which the Just do live; and all those divine and heavenly Qualifications, which are the certain Consequence, and best Evidence, of my Union to the Lord Jesus Christ; in whom all the Promises are Yea and Amen.
All this, and whatsoever else, is requisite to my present and future Happiness, must proceed from thee, who art the Author and Finisher of our Faith.—For thou hast declared, That none can come to the Son, but those whom the Father draws: And none can know the Father, but those to whom the Son doth reveal him. I desire therefore, in the Name and Strength, of my glorious and exalted Advocate and Redeemer, humbly to plead with Faith and Fervency, for the efficacious and all-conquering Drawings of thy holy Holy Spirit; that I may indeed obtain a saving Knowledge, of the thee, the living and true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.
O MY GOD! wilt thou be graciously pleased for Christ's Sake, to send forth thy Light [Page 37] and thy Truth, to lead me into all Truth, and enable me, at this Time, to make a faithful and sincere Enquiry, whether my Faith be true and saving? whether indeed Christ is formed in me? May I be enable now, and at all Times, so to believe and practice, as my tend most for thy Glory and the Salvation of my own Soul. May I never think, speak, or write, any Thing, but what I receive from thee, and is agreeable to thy holy Will.
I DESIRE to have my whole Dependance upon thy glorious Majesty, to enable me always to see divine Truths in a proper Light, and to work within me the whole good Pleasure of thy Grace, and the Work of Faith with Power. All this, and whatever else is needful for me and mine, and the whole Israel of God, I humbly beg for Christ's Sake:—To whom, with thy glorious Majesty, and the blessed Spirit of Grace, the Comforter, be rendered, the Kingdom, Power, Glory and Thanksgiving, now and evermore, Amen.
AND now having look'd up to Heaven, for divine Illumination; I will set about this important Enquiry, viz. What is the Foudation of my Faith?—whether I have indeed Felt the transforming Power of this Faith, and [Page 38] consequently whether I am by divine Grace; united unto Jesus Christ the Second Adam; by Virtue of which Union alone, I can live spiritually and eternally. An historical Faith, which is only conveyed to me by my Reason and Understanding, I know is not sufficient; for the Devils believe and tremble,—My Enquiry then must be, what is a true and saving Faith; and whether I have been made the happy Subject of this Faith. An historical and rational Faith, is indeed requisite as a Means, in order to the obtaining a saving Faith: For I read, that Faith comes by hearing;—how can we believe on him of whom we have not heard? I will therefore first examine, how far my Reason will assist me in this important Enquiry.
EVERY one that cometh unto God, must believe, that be is, and that be is the Rewarder of those that diligently seek him. That there is a God, a Supreme Being, the great Creator, and Lord Proprietor of all Things, not only the Light of Nature, and the Dictates of Reason, but my very Senses, inform me. For the invisible Things of him from the Creation of the World are clearly seen; being understood by the Things that are made, even his eternal Power and Godhead.
[Page 39]I CANNOT turn my Eyes any where, from the strarry Regions, and those glorious and magnificent. Luminaries, which adorn the Firmament above, to the lowest Shrub, or Spire of Grass, that grows upon the Face of the Ground; from the great Leviathan to the most insignificant Insect; but I must read indelible Characters, of an all-wise and powerful Creator!
WHEN I consider the exquisite Formation and Beauty of the human Body, I am filled with Admiration and Surprize;—but when I contemplate the more noble Part of our Frame, the intellectual Faculties of the immortal Soul, my Astonishment encreases:—I have the most ungainsayable Assurance, that both Body and Soul are of a divine Original.—Thus far my Reason confirms my Faith, with Respect to the Existence of a SUPREME BEING.
BUT as to my Faith in the Lord JESUS CHRIST, the great Saviour of the Worlds, and all the sublime and mysterious Doctrines, contained in the Christian Religion, I want the Assistance of Revelation:—Great is the Mystery of Godliness, God manifest in the Flesh.—We know these divine Truths, only because God has discovered them unto us. [Page 40] But that the Book, in Which I find all these glorious Doctrines so plainly and strongly asserted, is a Revelation from Heaven, my Reason very much assists me in the Belief of: So that the great Apostle of the Gentiles, with much Justice and Propriety, ranks Unbelievers with unreasonable Men. For altho' the sublime Misteries of the Gospel, are in themselves so infinitely beyond the Ken of human Reason; nor could ever be discovered by the dim Light of Nature; yet they are so plainly and convincingly conveyed to us in the sacred Scriptures, and attended with so strong an Evidence of their divine Authority, as is sufficient to obtain the Belief of every reasonnable and unprejudiced Person.
IN this blessed Book I find an Account of the Creation, which not only may Reason, but my very Senses, inform me is true. Here I read of the Fall of Man, which the dearbought Experience of every Day, assures me is Fact: How is our Gold become Dross, and our Beauty turn'd into loath some Defomity! Here I find a Promise of our Recovery, by the Seed of the Woman, who was appointed to bruise the Serpent's head. This Promise, my Reason tell me, must certainly be fulfilled; it being made by the true and unchangeable [Page 41] GOD.—But how, or in what Manner, this Promise was to be accomplish'd, neither Men nor Angels dare so much as have guess'd,—without divine Revelation. But the sacred Oracles of Truth, inform me, that God so loved the World, that he gave his only begotten Son, that all who believe in him, should not perish, but have Life everlasting.—This I believe upon the Authority of the Word of God. That JESUS CHRIST is this invaluable Gift, I have the Testimony of the great God himself, who by an audible Voice from Heaven, declar'd him, his beloved Son, in whom he is well pleas'd.—Upon this single Evidence I may safely venture my ALL, for Time and Eternity. That this Voice was indeed from the excellent Glory, and no Imposition upon the Senses of those that heard, it, appears in that the glorious God was pleas'd, to confirm the Misson of Christ, by the highest Evidence that can be,—his Resurrection from the Dead; which could be effected by no Power short of the Almighty Creator of all Things.
THIS, I think, is the strongest Demonstration of the Truth of all that Christ delilivered: For it cannot be supposed, that the Fountain of all possible Perfection would authorise [Page 42] a Fraud. The Facts which relate to our blessed Saviour, as they are recorded in the Gospel, are confirm'd by contemporary Writers, and exactly harmonize with the Predictions, concerning this divine Person, which are contain'd in the ancient Prophets.
As to the moral Precepts of the Christian Religion, I am well assured, that had PLATO, SENECA, and all the Masters of Reason of the Heathen World, seen that glorious Body of Laws; those excellent Precepts contain'd in our Saviour's Sermon upon the Mount, they would have said, that their Author was divine, and these Writings inspired.
THUS the great and glorious God, is pleas'd to deal with us as reasonable Creatures; and by Means and Instruments, conveys to us spiritual Truth: But after all, the sublime Mysteries of the Gospel, cannot be savingly comprehended, in this Way alone: The Line of Reason is too short, to teach those unfathomable Depths, which Angels themselves desire to look into. It is the mighty Power of God which produces in us that Faith, which is unto Salvation.
I ACKNOWLEDGE it is beyond all Expression, the greatest Blessing of my Life, that [Page 43] in the Course of my Education, I was favoured with the Holy Scriptures in my own Language; and have always enjoy'd the Means of Grace to help me in my Christian Race:—But if God had not, of his infinite Grace, sent forth a divine Ray of Light and Life, to enable me to receive JESUS, with my whole Soul, in all his Offices, for all his Benefits,— Wisdom, Righteousnes, Sanctification, and enternal Redemption; it is most certain, that the highest Degrees of speculative Knowledge, and all the extenal. Means of Grace, would have proved ineffectual to my Salvation.—It is the Work of God to encline me to believe in Christ. No Power short of the which created the World at first, could create me anew in Christ Jesus;—and nothing short of a new Creation, will prove effectual to my Salvation. It is a transforming Act of Faith that unites us to Christ, and gives a Title to that precious Promise, Because I live, ye shall live also.
BLESSED be God! I have an humble Hope thro' the boundless Riches of free Grace, that this Promise is fulfill'd in me, and that I have the highest and strongest Evidence of the Truth of the Christian Religion by the Witof the Spirit!—Not by an unreasonable [Page 44] Impulse made upon my Mind, but the the transforming Efficacy which divine Truths have had upon my Soul.
I CAN testify from my own Experience, with what exalted Pleasure, the sincere and prayerful Christian reads the sacred Records. How doth the true Believer spell out the promised Messiah, in the Types, Figures, and Ceremonies, of the Old Testament Dispensation!—How often do we read his Name, in brighter and more legible Characters, in the inspir'd Prophecies!—How beautifully do the two Testaments agree, in every Thing essential to our Salvation!—What we find recorded in the Prophecies of the Old, we read in the History of the New.
How exact an Agreement is there between the renewed Nature, and the Precepts of the Gospel! Our great Teacher gives us a comprehensive Summary of the Moral Law, in those few Words: Thou shall love the Lord thy God with all thy Heart, with all thy Soul, and with all thy Strength, and thou shalt love thy Neighbour as thy self. By the Operation of the blessed Spirit, I am enabled to acquiesce in this Law; not only as my bounden Duty and most reasonable Service, but as my highest Happiness, and greatest Privilege.
[Page 45]How inexpressibly refreshing, have the Promise and Invitations of the Gospel, been to me, because of their exact Suitableness to my Wants! When God, by a Ray of divine Light, was pleased to discover, my wretched and miserable State by Nature and Practiced, how comfortable was it, to find the Invitations of Grace address'd to such a polluted, selflruined Creature, as I am!—I have nothing to plead in my own Behalf, but must hold up my Hand at the Bar of God, and cry out, GUILTY, GUILTY; for in thy Sight can no Flesh living be justified upon their own Account. But blessed be thy glorious Majesty! Thou hast proclaim'd thy Name, the Lord gracious and [...], forgiving Iniquity, Transgression, and Sin: Therefore I am encouraged to pray, Pardon my Iniquity, for it is very great;—Heal my Soul, for I have sinned against thee.
How free and universal is the Gospel Call! Ho, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the Waters, and be that that no Money, come buy and eat, &c. And I have an humble Hope, thro' the Riches of Free Grace in CHRIST JESUS, that I have heard the Voice of GOD speaking to me in these Invitations; and been enabled by the promis'd Spirit to obey [Page 46] the heavenly Call, with an earnest Thirst after the Blessings of the new and wellordered Convenant;—the dear bought Purchase of the Redeemer's Blood;—and to receive JESUS CHRIST in all his Offices,—to live upon him, as authorized by God the Father, to fulfill in his People the whole good Pleasure of his Will. And as I receives the first Breath of spiritual Life, from the inexhaustible Fountain of Free Grace, so I have still my entire Dependance, upon the same unmerited Assistance, For Time and Eternity.
THIS is my strong Anchor hold, my ssafe Retreat, my Light, my Life, my everlasting ALL IN ALL. When I look upon myself, I really find I am a poor, indigent, helpless Creature, surrounded with numberless and powerful Enemies. In these deplorable Circumstances, I must inevitably sink down in utter Dispair, were it not for this divine Support, this omnipotent Arm; under whose Influence, every Strom of Temptation drives me to the Harbour, and every Onset of the Enemy, cause me to take faster hold of my victorious Leader.—In this Way the Soul is safe and happy in the most tempestuous Season.—That Soul cannot be lost, that is united to CHRIST, the living Head of his People.
[Page 47]To such how pleasant and profitable are the Psalms! How often doth the humble Believer, read the Redeemer's, Name in many sublime Passages of that sacred Book, and rise up to God on David's seraphic Wing!—How beautfu1 is the divine Morality contain'd in the Proverbs of Solomon! Who can read them, and not blush for his many criminal Violations, of those admirable Instruction of Wisdom!—With what Pleasure and Advantage doth the Child of God, peruse the Song of Solomon; and find the Glories of redeeming Love in that mysterious Composure! How often is he ready to join with the Spouse, in her pathetic Encomiums on our Blessed Saviour! He is the chiefest among Ten Thousands, yea, he is altogether lovely;—This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend. How frequently, under a pressing Sense of his utter Insufficiency so much as to think a good Thought; does he send up his importunate Prayer in the Language of the Church: Awake, thou North Wind, and come, thou South Wind, and blow upon my Garden, that the Spices thereof may flow out! Then let ye Beloved come and eat his pleasant Fruit. How doth the humble and self-denying Christian, in this Way, set under Christ's Shadow with great [Page 48] Delight,—and his Fruit is sweet to their Taste: He travels thro' the Wilderness of this World leaning upon his Beloved; and not with standing all the Labyrinths of Sins, Sorrows and Temptations, he is exposed to, in the Strength of his exalted Head, shall obtain the Prize of immortal Glory.
WITH what humble Admiration does the true Believer meditate upon the sacred History of the Incarnation; Birth, Sufferings, Death and Resurrection of our BLESSED REDEEMER! How great a Tendency hath a realizing View of those, important Truths; to suppress the Fire of Anger, Hatred, Malice, and Revenge! How strongly doth it incline him to mortify every Sins, when he considers how dear it cost the SON of GOD, to make Attonement for it; at what an infinite Expence he hath purchased our Deliverance from this vilest of Slavery,—and the Liberty and Privileges of the Children of God! How powerfully does it perswade us to take up every Cross, with Chearfulness and Resignation, when we remember, that in this Way we trace the divine Footsteps of our Saviour, and follow the great Captain of our Salvation who was made perfect thro' Sufferings! How irresistible does his dying Love engage us to [Page 49] devote our selves to him, an holy, living, and acceptable Sacrifice!
I HAVE an humble Hope, through the powerful Efficacy of divine Grace, that I have experienced the sanctifying Power of these Truths upon my own Soul. I find every Deviation from the pure and perfect Law of God, is inexpressibly more bitter to me, than the greatest Affliction. Every earnest Aspiration of my Heart, is for greater Conformity to the divine Image and Will. It is my perpetual Prayer, that God would send down a more plentiful Effusion of the Blessed Spirit, into my Soul, and the Souls of my Children and Grand-Children, to the End of Time; that every high Thought, and towering Imagination, may be subdued to the Obedience of faith; and that every Thing contrary thereto, may be brought out and destroyed. That wee may indeed ,know and fear, love and serve, the living and true God, and Jesus Christ whom he has sent.
O! WHEN shall the Time be, that the Kingdoms of this World, shall become, the Kingdoms of the Lord, and of his Christ! When the Knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ shall cover the Earth, as the Waters do the Sea!
[Page 50]O MY GOD, and heavenly Father, in Jesus Christ! hast thou not enabled me sincerely to say, Whom have I in Heaven but thee? May not I appeal to thy all-penetrating Eye, that it is not the golden Streets, nor sparkling Gates, nor glittering Splendors of that glorious Place, that attract my Affections: No, thou who art the Searcher of Hearts, knowest, that it is Thou thy, self, the ORIGINAL FOUNTAIN of Perfection and Blessedness, that my Soul chooses for my everlasting Portion; Nor is there any on Earth that I desire in Comparison of thee: In thy Favour is Life, and thy loving Kindness is better than all its most valuable Enjoyments. Were I advanc'd to the Helm of thy lower Creation; plac'd in the most prosperous Circumstances, which the most fruitful Imagination could form an Idea of; and assured that I should possess them forever;— without thy self, O my GOD, they would be all a Blank to me; I should despise them as the vilest Dust under my Feet.
O! WOULD thy glorious Majesty, be pleased to hold out the Sceptre of thy Grace, and permi [...] [...]e to ask what I would have! Should I not immediately reply, This is my Petition; this is my humble Request, that I may be perfectly conform'd to thy Will, [Page 51] and favoured with the uninterrupted Enjoyment of thy Love, And now, O my GOD! may I not receive this, and all the other Tokens of a sanctify'd Heart, as an Evidence of my Union to CHRIST, and a living Witness of the Truth and Divinity of the Christian Religion!
IF I have indeed been enabled to receive JESUS CHRIST, according to the free Offers of the Gospel, how infinite are my Obligations to divine Grace! Infinite beyond all Conception and Imagination! How vast is the Disproportion, between my Obligation, and the Power of Acknowledgment! How can a finite Creature, clog'd with Flesh, groaning under the Burden of remaining Corruption, and still struggling with Darkness and Temptation; offer up a suitable Sacrifice to thee, who art a Being of infinite Purity and Perfection!
I DESIRE to be deeply humbled before thee, O my GOD! for all my Sins original and actual; in every Stage Station, Relation and Circumstance of Life; in all I have sinned, and fallen short of my Duty. I desire to be humbled in a more especial Manner, for my black Ingratitude to the GOD of my LIFE; and my Unfruitfulness, under the distinguishing Receipts of divine and spiritual [Page 52] Mercies. How greatly have all the Faults, and Foliies of my Life been aggravated, since GOD was graciously pleased to shew me the Vanity and Emptiness of all sublunary Enjoyments, and to lead me out to himself as my only satisfying Portion. O astonishing Madness! that after all this, my foolish fluctuating Heart, should be sipping at the Puddle-Streams of Creature Comforts, to the Neglect of the inexhausted Fountain of uncreated Goodness! O how empty and trifling has my Conversation sometimes been, when I am under the strongest Obligations, sacredly to devote, all my Powers and Faculties, at all Times, to the Service of Heaven!
How justly might thy glorious Majesty have punish'd this my Folly, with utter Desertion! but instead of this, thou hast not only strove with, but overcome my ungrateful and stupid Heart; and enabled me to say with ardent Desire, As the Hart panteth after the Water Brooks, so panteth my Soul after thee, my GOD.
ALAS! how inconceivably great is my Obligation, and how short do I fall of performing any Part of it, as I ought! My very Tears want washing; my most penitent Confessions, call for the Sorrows of Repentance; [Page 53] my most exalted Praise are so extreamly deficient; that shouldst thou mark the Iniquity of my best Performances, thou mightest justly cast them back, as Dung, in my Face, and spurn me out of thy favourable Presence. But blessed, and forever blessed be thy Name, for free Grace, and redeeming Love. Blessed be God, for Jesus Christ, whom thou hast given to be a Propitiation for the Sins of the World. In his Name, and thro' his Merits and Mediation, I desire to come and cast my self at thy Feet; and put in for a Share of all the Blessings of the new Covenant, according to the free, full, and absolute Offers of the Gospel. If the Invitation had been address'd to good People, I should have had no Hope; for I have Nothing properly my own; but Sin and Misery: All my Confidence is plac'd in thy undeserved Mercy, and the Righteousness of thy dear Son. In Obedience to thy Command, I fly to the Blood of Jesus, for Pardon and Cleansing, for Health and Healing. Blessed be God, for Jesus Christ, the Fountain of all Grace, to an apostate World!—for the promised Spirit, the eternal Comforter of his Church!—for the Means of Grace, and the Hopes of Glory! Time is too short, and Eternity not too long, to celebrate the Praises of redeeming Love. I could wish for the [Page 54] Tongue! of a Seraph, to assist me in this delightful Employment. But who of all the heavenly Choir, can raise a Note equal to my Obligation! They are not of the guilty, fallen Race of Adam, as I am; they, have never sinned, as I have done; they are not redeem'd by the Blood of the SON of GOD, as I am. Redemption! O! the charming Sound! How beautiful are the Feet of those who bring these glad Tydings to guilty Sinners! This is a Balm for every Wound; a Medicine for every Disease; a Relief in every Difficulty.
TO THEE , O Lord, do I still look for all I want, for my self and Posterity, for Time and Eternity, My Eyes are ever towards the Lord: On thee do I wait all the Day,—even till Faith shall be swallowed up in Vision, and Expectation in full Fruition. Then shall I be more fully inclined and enabled, to join my joyful Voice with all the heavenly Hosts, and sing, Blessing, Honour, Glory, and Power, to the Lamb that was stain; for he has redeem'd us with his Blood, out of every Kindred, and Tongue, and People, and Nation. Amen, and Amen.
COME, Lord JESUS, come quickly, and take to thy self, thy great Power, and reign.
MEDITATION II.
On the EXCELLENCY and ADVANTAGE of the CHRISTIAN RELIGION.
O MY GOD! thou hast taught me from my Youth: and hitherto I have declar'd thy wondrous Works: Now also when I am old and grey Headed, O God forsake me not; until I have shewed thy Strength unto this Generation, and thy Power to every one that is to come.
FULFIL, O my GOD! That Promise which thou hast made unto thy People, unto me the unworthiest of thy Servants;— They shall bring forth Fruit in old Age, they shall be fat and flourishing, to shew that the Lord is gracious. Enable me to set my Seal to the superlative Excellency of true Religion; and confirm what the whole Experience of my Life, assures me is true; and what I must say if I was sure those were my last Words; viz. That the Christian Religion is every Way calculated, for the Welfare of Mankind; and when reduc'd into Practice, under the Influence of Faith and Love, the only sure [Page 56] Way to preserve us from every hurtful and deadly Evil,—to obtain the Peace and Pleasure upon Earth, and Eternal Happiness in Heaven.
To prove this Proposition, I will first consider the meer moral Man, who has nothing else in View, but the Honour and Advantage of this Life.—This Man is strictly just in his Dealings, generous to his Friend, charitable to the Poor, kind and beneficient to all, as far as his Circumstances will admit.—He is careful to hurt Body by Word or Deed; he walks is the straight Path of Truth and Integrity, in his Commerce with his Fellow Creatures; and governs himself by the Rules of moral Vertue, in all his external Conduct; in eating, drinking, sleeping, Recreation, &c. observes the Laws of Sobriety and Temperance. That this Man has a just Claim to the Honour, Esteem and Affection, of all that converse with him; I suppose none will deny. O how many Advantages does he receive from his amiable Behaviors!
HIs kind and generous Disposition, naturally and necessarily advaces his,Credit; and for ehe most part he: experiences the Truth and Benefit of those Texts,— He that watereth, [Page 56] shall also be watered himself. There is that scattereth, and yet encreaseth. The liberal Soul deviseth liberal Things, and by liberal Things be stands. While the Miser is abhorr'd both by God and Man; and often feels the Force of those Words: There is that with-holdeth more than is meet, and it tendeth to Poverty.
STRICT Justice in all our Transactions with Mankind, is the readiest Way to enlarge our Business, and by that Means to encrease our Estates; while the fradulent Dealer, is in the utmost Danger of being detected and ruin'd. A steady. Integrity in our whole Conduct, is upon all Accounts, most easy and honourable. Truth wants no Contrivance or Invention; but, like a perfect Beauty, looks best, at the nearest Approach:—It will bear the Test of the most critical Inquiry, and ever comes off with universal Applause. Even the most prostigate, have a secret Reverence for that, which they have not the Honesty to practise. Whereas the insincere and fallacious, when discovered, are the Objects of publick Contempt, and avoided by all that know them.
THAT Temperance in eating, drinking; &c. contribute to the Health of the Body, and the Strength and Brightness of the intellectual [Page 58] Faculties, is a Truth, to which the Experience of all Ages bears Testimony. Epicurus himself, who knew no other Religion than Pleasure, lived principally upon Herbs, and the pure Water of the Books. And nothing can be more self-evident than, that a clear Head, and an healthy Body, is essential to the Comfort and Enjoyment of the present Life. The dear-bought Experience of the Licentious, shews, that Intemperance in its own Nature, hath a Tendency to break the firmest Consttution; and is attended with a melacholly Train of Sorrows and Diseases.
IF we consider those Vertues, which may be properly stiled Christian, viz.—Humility, Patience, Self-denial, and Forgiveness of Injuries; these Vertues also carry their own Reward with them, by establishing the Mind in Tranquility and Peace: While Pride, Envy, Wrath, and Revenge, embitter the Spirits, corrode the Vitals, and devour every easy Thought.
I THINK then it is evident, beyond all Contradiction, that the Precepts of moral Vertue, with those additional Improvements, which are made to them by the Gospel of Christ, are to all Intents and purposes calculated to advance the Honour, Interest Peace [Page 59] and Pleasure of Mankind; so that every one that is under the Government of his Reason, would choose to live in the Practice of them, upon the Principles of Self-love, altho' he had no other Motive.
IT must be acknowledged, that these moral Vertues are truly excellent and lovely in themselves, and so essential to the Christian character, that all Pretences to it, in a Neglect of these, is a fatal Delusion; and these vain Professors, must expect no other Sentence from the Mouth of their supreme Judge than that, Depart from me, I know you not, ye Workers of Iniquity.
BUT when these Vertues proceed only from the Principles of Self-love, they are essentially defective. The true Christian,—the spiritualminded Man, is animated with nobler Motives and Designs. Love to God, the most perfect Being, and Faith in Christ, the Saviour of Mankind, are the vital Springs of his Obedience to the Laws of Heaven.
WHILE the meer moral Man is compassing himself about with Sparks of his own enkindling, and satisfied with his own Goodness; the real Christian has been made to see, that he has nothing that he can properly call his [Page 60] own, but Pollution and Deformity; and nothing to expect from God, upon his own Account, but Destruction and Misery. He is taught by the illuminating Influence of divine Grace, to renounce all Self-dependence, and wait at the Footstool of a sovereign GOD, for Deliverance from all the Wretchedness of the Apostacy. By this hie is prepared to receive the compassionate Offers of the Gospel; and thankfully to commit himself into the Hands of an Almighty Saviour: And when once he is perswaded, by the Drawings of the Father, to come to Christ, as his living LORD and HEAD, to say in the Language of Appropriation, MY LORD, AND MY GOD then, and not till then, can he perform acceptable Obedience. For 'tis by Power derived from the Life-giving JESUS, that we are enabled to do any Thing spiritually Good; and we remain his poor dependant Creatures to the End of Life.
How happy are the Effects that flow from an Union with him! The humble Soul finds Light, Life and Strength sufficient to answer all his Wants; to triumph over all his Difficulties. Amidst all the all Darkness, Troubles and Temptations of this tempestuous Region, he has a safe Retreat, [Page 61] an unfailing Defence. The Soul finds a Rest in God, and tastes that Peace, which passes all Understanding. He finds by happy Experience, that Wisdom's Ways are Pleasantness, and all her Paths Peace. That Promise of our blessed Saviour, is accomplished in his Behalf; He that loveth me, him will my Father honour. These are not vain Amusements, but substantial Realities; which lay a solid Foundation for present Comfort, and give undoubted Assurance of future Felicity. They behold the Glory of God, in the Face of Jesus Christ, in the Glass of the Gospel; and by this Means, are changed into the same Image, from Glory to Glory, even by the Spirit of the Lord.
THESE distinguish'd Persons will all set their Seal to the Truth of this Proposition; that the Christian Religion, is every way calculated to promote the Welfare of Mankind; and when reduced to Practice, under the Influence of Faith and Love, is the only sure Way to preserve us from every, hurtful and deadly Evil; to obtain true Peace and Pleasure upon Earth, and eternal Happiness in Heaven.
JUSTLY does Doctor Leighton, in one of his Letters say;— ‘Thorns grow every [Page 62] where, and from all Things here below; but to a Soul transplanted out of it self into the Root of Jesse, Peace grows every where too, from him who is our Peace; and whom we shall find to be the more so, the more entirely we live in him, by being dead to the World, to Flesh and Self, and all Things besides him.’ O! when shall it be?
INEXPRESSIBLE is the Benefit of this Transplantation: New Life begun, and such a Life as is certainly progressive, even to Life eternal. For, altho' by the unerring Wisdom of the great Head of the Church, the Canaanites are yet left in the Land, for the Exercise and Tryal of his faithful People; yet they are really and essentially, upon all Accounts, the only happy Persons. I shall mention some few Instances, which will be evident to all such as have, by supernatural Grace, been made Partakers of this thrice happy Change.
As they have been convinced of the Vanity of all Creature Enjoyments, so they have been lead by a divine Attraction, to God the, boundless OCEAN of all possible Good; and in him enjoy a compleat and independent Hapiness. All the Comforts of this Life [Page 63] come with a double Sweetness, as proceeding from their heavenly Father, and conveyed thro' the Channel of the new Covenant.—They have a sacred Assurance that all Things are theirs, whether Paul, or Apollos, or Cephas, or the World, or Life, or Death, or Things present, or Things to come;— All Things are yours, says the Apostle, and ye are Christ's, and Christ is God's.
OH! how inexpressibly great, are the Blessings contain'd in these few Lines. If the true Believer meets with bitter Afflictions of various Sorts, he is divinely taught to know how just and reasonable it is, that he should be made Partaker of the Fellowship of Christ's Sufferings.—If in Circumstances of distressing Poverty; the remembers the Son of God had not where to lay his Head; and was obliged to work a Miracle to answer the Demands of the publick Tribute. — If the Billows of Adversity rise so high, that in the Extremity of Distres, he is ready to say, the Waters are come into my Soul; I sink deep in the Mire, where there is no standing; then he is enabled to look to the Rock, that is higher than he: And by Faith goes into the Garden, where our blessed Saviour was in such an Agony, that he sweat great Drops of Blood, and said, My [Page 64] Soul is sorrowful even unto Death.—If at any Time, he meets with reproachful Treatment from those whom he has laid under the highest Obligations; he takes a Turn in his Meditations, with Jesus Christ, to the Judgment-Hall, where he was abused, not only by the worst of Men, but forsaken of his own peculiar Disciples: From thence he ascends the Mount of Calvary, where this divine Person suffered a cruel Death, and which was worse than all, endured the Hidings of his Father's Countenance.
HATH the Lord Jesus Christ done and suffered all this for me! and shall I think much to suffer and Affliction, that he shall see meet to lay upon me!—"No surely!" will be the Language of every humble Believer. Let me rather rejoice in Tribulation or Weakness, that the Strength and Grace of Christ may be manifested in me.
How happy a Cure is an Interest in Christ, for all those malignant Passions, which are so Destrutive to the Peace and Purity of human Nature! Whence do these Disorders arise, but from the Misapplication of the Passions and Affections, those powerful Engines of the Soul, which are polluted and depraved by Sin. But no sooner are we united to Christ, but our Nature is changed;—the [Page 65] Constitution of the Soul is altered;—Life is began;—Holiness is our Element;—and Sin the Aversion of the renewed Mind.
Now he understands that seeming Paradox, when St. John says in one Place, He that is born of God cannot sin; and again in the same Chapter; If we say, we have no Sin, we deceive our selves, and the Truth is not in us. The regenerate Soul cannot sin, with Inclination; it crosses the Grain of the new Nature: And yet he cannot say, he hath no Sin; for he feels the Remains of Corruption, which makes him often complain with St. Paul: O! wretched Man that I am, who shall deliver me from this Body, of Sin and Death!
THE Desire of the Mind, no longer wander after a Variety of Vanities and Follies, but are fix'd upon God, the only Centre of Rest,—the only adequate Portion of an imnmortal Soul. In Conseqence of this, that impetuous Thirst after Happiness, which is implanted in the Breasts of all Men, is rectified: So that while the natural Man, is always seeking the Living among the Dead, and enquring, who will shew me any worldly Good;— the Heaven-born Spirit, cries out, Lord, lift thou up the Light of thy Countenance upon me, so will I rejoice more than when Corn and Wine are increased.
[Page 66]THAT which Bread is to the Hungry, Water to the Thirsty, Rest to the Weary, that, and infinitely more, art thou, O my God! to my Soul. Thou art my Strength in Weakness, — my Light in Darkness, — my best Friend in the Absence of all others,—my best Company in the closest Solitude,—my satisfying Portion in all Uncertainties. Even Death it self, cannot deprive the true Believer of his Happiness; but completes it. While in the World, Grief and Sorrow, which in the carnal Mind, often work Death, in the spiritual Man, produce Life and Peace. He finds more true Comfort, in mourning for Sin, than in all the carnal Pleasures which the World can give.
UPON the whole then, I think it evidently true, that the Christian is the only happy Person in this World; and as to the Future, the Apostle tells us, Eye hath not seen, Ear hath nor heard, nor hath it entered into the Heart of Man, to conceive, what God hath laid up for them that love him. And as the Pleasure and Advantages of Religion, are inexpressibly great here and hereafter; so the Madness and Misery of Irreligion, are inexpressibly dreadful, both in this World and the Next.
MEDITATION III.
On the Suitableness of JESUS CHRIST, to the Circumstances of Apostate Sinners.
OUT of the Depths have I cried to thee.
O MY GOD! Have Compassion on the Workrmanship of thy Hands, for thy Name, and thy Mercy's Sake, in Jesus Christ our Lord.
BEHOLD what Desolation the Enemy hath made in thy once beautiful Creation! How is, our Beauty stained, and the Glory departed from us. Our Understandings darkened; our Wills perverse; our Passions and Affections misplac'd.— Is there no Balm in Gilead? no Physician there? Yes; blessed be thy Name, O my God! thou hast appointed the Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of thy Love, to be a complete and eternal Saviour. He has paid the dreadful Debt we ow'd thy Justice, to the uttermost Farthing; and has brought in everlasting Righteousness to justify the most guilty Offenders: The immaculate LAMB OF GOD, is strong enough to wrest the Prey out of the Jaws of the roaring Lion of Hell. The [Page 68] compassionate Jesus is able to save unto the uttermost, all that come to God by him.
HAST thou not commanded all the Ends of the Earth to look unto him and be saved? Hast thou not promis'd, that whatsoever we ask in thy Name, according to thy Will, it shall be granted? And now, O my God, and heavenly Father! I come at thy Call, and cast my self at thy Majesty's Feet, in Obedience to thy Command; earnestly praying, That thou would'st of thy free Grace, bestow upon me, and my Posterity, all the Blessings which thou seest we stand in need of.
AND now I am come to the Fountain of Grace, my Desire the shall boundless: I put up my Request for all the Blessings of the new Covenant; and beseech thee to fullfil in me, and mine, the whole good Pleasure of thy Will, and the Work of Faith with Power. All the Motives to do this, must flow from thy blessed self; I have nothing to plead, but my own Misery, and the unbounded Compassions of thy Nature. I desire to draw near unto thee, in the prevailing Name of thy deer Son, and ask for Things agreeable to thy Will, and nothing else.
[Page 69]HAST thou not commanded me to belive in thy Son Jesus Christ? Hast thou not commanded me to love the Lord my God, with all my Heart, with all my Soul, and with all my Strength, and my Neighbour as my self? Hast thou not commanded me to ask for thy blessed Spirit; without whose all-conquering Influence, it is impossible for me to do any Thing that is good? And hast thou not, by thy inward Operations upon my Heart, made these Things the Sum of all my Wishes, the Matter of all the earnest and perpetual Aspirations of my longing Soul?—And now wilt thou not satisfy these Desires, which thou thy self hast rais'd in my Heart? Wilt thou not graciously hear and answer these Requests, which thou hast commanded and excited me to make?—Behold! I lie at,thy Feet, and wait for the Accomplishment of all thy Promises, thro' Jesus Christ alone:—To whom with thy glorious Majesty, and the blessed Spirit of all Grace, be rendered, Blessing, Praise, Dominion and Power, now and ever more, Amen.
AND now, O my Soul! have I not abundant Encouragement, to hope for all the Blessings of Salvation, when I consider the exact the Suitableness of the Lord Jesus Christ, [Page 70] in his Offices and Qualifications, to redress the Miseries, and supply the Wants, of apostate and miserable Sinners,
ARE all the Race of Adam, in their natural State, destitute of spiritual Life, and prone to all Manner of Evil? The Lord Jesus Christ, the Second Adam, hath Life in himself, and giveth Life unto the World. Are we lost? He came to seek and to save, those that are lost. Are our Iniquities exceedingly multiplied?—He came to save the chief of Sinners; and died, the Just for the Unjust, that he might bring us to God. Are we Rebels?— He ascended on High, and receive Gifts for Men, even for the Rebellious, that the Lord God might dwell among us. This is exactly what we want, and what is necessary to make us happy: For all the Misery of Mankind proceeds from this; that we have departed from God: All our Happiness consists in this; that we return unto him.
FURTHERS, are we altogether Bankrupts by Nature, destitute of Strength to serve God, and Righteousness to recommend us to his Favour?—Christ is the LORD OUR RIGHTEOUSNESS: In him it hath pleased the Father [Page 71] that all Fullness should dwell, that of his Fullness we might receive Grace for Grace? Are we ignorant? He is the great Prophet of his Church;—none teaches like him. Are we guilty, condemn'd by the Law of God? Christ is a Priest for ever after the Order of Melchisedec; and hath made full Satisfaction to divine Justice, when he trod the Wine-Press of his Father's Wrath. Are we too weak to contend with Flesh and Blood, and the Principalities and Powers of the Kingdom of Darkness?.—Christ Jesus is the King of his Church; the great Captain of our Salvation, through whom his loyal People, shall eventually gain the Conquest over all their spiritual Enemies.
BUT, O blind, unbelieving, impenitent Creatures that we are, while in our natural State!—Sold under Sin; the Captives of Hell; and Slaves to every base and sordid Lust; and until unlightned, insensible either of our Misery or Remedy!—But even in these deplorable Circumstances, how wonderfully is our glorious . Redeemer, qualified to redress our Miseries!—He came to convince the World of Sin. He is exalted a Prince and a Saviour, to give Repentance as well as Remission of Sin. He came to proclaim Liberty to Captives, to open the Prison Doors to them [Page 72] that art bound:—He save his People from their Sins.—He is the Bread of Life, to the hungry starving Soul; the Water of Life, to the thirsty perishing Creature. He restores the Wanderer; reclaims the Profligate, and receives the returning Prodigal into his dearest Embraces. He casts out seven Devils, remits Thousands of Offences, and then gives Grace to love much, because much is forgive. In short, all Manner of Blessings, spiritual and temporal, he offers freely to the greatest Transgressors.
AND now, O my GOD! wilt thou permit, and enable me, a poor, sinful, and unworthy, Creature, to come in the Name, and for the Sake of this all-sufficient Redeemer, to plead with thy glorious Majesty, for Grace to, comply with thy Offers. For altho' it is Truth of the greatest Certainty and Importance, that the Lord Jesus Christ, whom thou hast graciously given, to be the Repairer of our Breaches, is every Way qualified to perform his exalted Office; yet O my God! if thou dost not, of thy sovereign Mercy, draw us by the Cords of thy invincible Grace, to thy Son, and thy Self, we shall, after all, perish eternally.
[Page 73]O THAT thou wouldst have Compassion upon the Souls that thou hast made, and exert thy almighty Power for our Deliveance! Shall we perish for Hunger, in Sight of the greatest Plenty!—Shall we die in Poverty, in View of the richesf Treasure!—Yes, we shall,—if thou, of thine own meer Grace, dost not make us thy willing People in the Day of thy Power.
AND may I not have an humble Hope, that thou hast performed this great Work, in and for me? And may I not accept this as an Evidence of thy special Love? In me, that, is, in my Flesh, there dwells no good Thing. Of my Self I can do Nothing, all my Sufficiency is in God. In the uninterrupted Communications of thy Spirit doth the of my Soul consist.
To thee therefore, who art the Fountain of LIGHT AND LIFE, and the Giver of every good and perfect Gift, I desire always to come and here to wait, in the diligent Use of all appointed Means, for all suitable Good of every Kind. I renounce every other Dependance, for Justification, but the Blood of JESUS;—for Sanctification, but the powerful Operations of the Spirit.—I desire now, and [Page 74] perpetually, to receive this JESUS, as the Prophet, Priest, and King of my Salvation; to bring me to all the Happiness of his redeemed People.
I COME to thee, O divine Redeemer! not imagining I have any Thing of my own to commend me to thy Acceptance.—Never was there any of the Race of apostate Adam saved, but such as God was pleased to create a-new in Christ Jesus unto good Works. Never was there any prior Goodness in any of all that unhappy Stock, to induce thy sacred Majesty, to perform that miraculous Work for them;—the Motives are in thy Self;—According to the unsearchable Riches of thy Grace in Christ, thou bestowest Redemption upon us. In the Covenant which thou proposest to our Acceptance, thou hast taken the Work into thine own Hand; this is one of its glorious Articles,— I will cause them to approach unto me with their whole Hearts, and, when we thus approach unto thee, thou hast graciously promised, I will be their God, and they shall be my People. Thus, thou art the ALPHA and OMEGA of our Salvation,—the whole Work is thine from the Foundation to the Top-Stone. I come to thee, [Page 75] O GOD THE FATHER! who art the generous Donor,—to thee, O GOD THE SON! who art the meritorious Purchaser,—to thee, O GOD THE HOLY GHOST! who art the Almighty Applier of all the Benefits of Redemption.—On thee, O adorable TRINITY! do I desire incessantly to rely, till my latest Breath, for the Blessings of Time and Eternity,— To whom should I go but unto thee, for thou only hast the Words of Eternal Life.
WILT thou be pleased to hear and answer, and do for me and mine, and the whole Israel of God, as our various Wants and Miseries, Sins and Sorrows, require; not according to our Deserts, but thy undeserved Grace, in Christ Jesus our Lord. And to thy Name be the Glory forever. Amen.
A THANKSGIVING for Converting GRACE.
O My God! the Fountain of Perfection and Blessedness, and Giver of every good Gift, thro' Jesus Christ, the Son of thy Love! Altho' I am unworthy to take thy sacred Name, into my polluted Lips, and upon my own Account, may tremble to appear before the Throne of thy unspotted Purity: Yet thou hast been pleased, to consecrate a new and living Way, in which we may enter into thy holy Presence, thro' the Blood of Jesus: In this Way, I desire to draw near unto thee at this Time, and pray, that I may be enabled, faithfully to recollect, and thankfully to record, thy distinguishing Grace and Mercy, towards me thy unworthy Creature, as vile by Nature as any of the apostate Race of Adam.
I DESIRE humbly to acknowledge, with the deepest Gratitude, that my Lot was cast in a Land of Light; and that I have the sacred Oracles of Truth, in my own Language; while so many Thousands perish for lack of [Page 77] Vision. I bless thy Name, that I descended from pious Ancestors, and had the Privilege of a religious Education. But altho' these are great Privileges in themselves, and when accompanied, with the efficacious Power of divine Grace, are made the Means of Salvation; yet without this sacred Energy, they would all have proved a Blank to me, and served only to aggravate my Account: Under the most perswasive Means, I should have turned a deaf Ear to Instruction, and perish'd in my Guilt and Folly.
BUT, bless the Lord, O my Soul! and all that is within me, bless his Holy Name; that when my Soul was all over a dark and disorder'd Chaos; when my Nature was fill'd with nothing but Wretchedness and Pollution;—when I had no true Knowledge, either of my Misery and Remedy, but was dead in Trespasses and Sins, without Power to help my self; — That then, O, my GOD! it was a Time of thy Love; thou by thy illuminating Grace didst enable me to see my miserable, lost guilty and bankrupt Circumstances, by Nature and Practice; and in this distressing Exigence, when there was no human Eye to pity me, nor any created Arm that could help me, wast graciously pleased to [Page 78] lead me to the Almighty and compassionate Redeemer; and by a sweet, but powerful Attraction, incline me, in the Want of every Thing that is good, to receive Jesus Christ as he is freely offered in the Gospel; and in and thro' him, to go out to thee, the great and glorious JEHOVAH, for all the Blessings of the New-Covenant, which he hath purchased with the inestimable Price of his Blood.
IT is my Security and Happiness that in this Covenant, thou art taking the whole Work of our Salvation into thy own Hand, and by thy divine Power, createst thy People a new in Christ Jesus unto good Works: With Pleasure I read the gracious and condescending Tenor of it.— This is the Covenant, which I will make with the House of Israel, after those Days, saith the Lord; I will put my Laws into their Mind, and write them on their Hearts: And I will be to them a God, and they shall be to me a People. For I will be merciful to their Unrighteousness, and their Sins and their Iniquities, will I remember no more.—O what an immense Treasure, is comprehended in these Promises, when spoken by the omnipotent and faithful God! It is the good Pleasure of thy Grace, that inclin'd thee to make these Promises;— and it is the [Page 79] same good Pleasure, that enabled me to receive and trust in them.
THOU hast been pleased to proclaim thy Name, The Lord God, gracious and merciful, forgiving Iniquity, Transgression and Sin. This is the strong Tower in which thou hast caused me to hope from my Youth up: Had there been any prior Goodness necessary to attract thy Affection, I must have sunk into the Depths of utter Dispair;—for thy allseeing Eye discerned my Poverty and Misery. Blessed be God, for Free Grace, and Redeeming Love to the worst of Sinners! Upon this Foundation thou didst enable me to come in, and accept of the Act of Grace, publish'd in favour of the rebellious Sinners of Mankind.
AND now, O my God, and heavenly Father in Jesus Christ! I desire, with exalted Thankfulness, and humble Confidence, to plead with thy gracious Majesty;—hast thou not declared, in thy unalterable Word, that thou hast given thy only begotten Son, to be a Propitiation for the Sins of the World; and assured us, that he hath satisfied divine Justice in its utmost Demands, and wrought out pure, perfect, and everlasting Righteousness; [Page 80] and is authorized to secure the Salvation of all those that come to God by him! — And hast thou not, O Searcher of Hearts! from whom every good Thought proceeds, enabled me to give Credit to these Declarations of thy Grace; and accordingly to commit my Soul, into the Hands of thy dear Son, to be saved by him, in his appointed Way! — Has not the Foundation of my Hope and Confidence from my Youth up, been the immutable Good-Will of God, who when I was dead, said unto me, Live—the unblemish'd Merits of Christ, who is the End of the Law for Righteousness, to every one that believeth,—and the unfailing Stability of the Covenant of Grace, according to which I expect divine Acceptance.
AND wilt thou be pleased, O my God! to allow me, after so many Years Experience, to bear my humble Testimony to the Stability of this Covenant, and the Veracity of the Covenanter. Have I not found, that thy Grace is free; and that all thy Promises in Christ Jesus, are YEA AND AMEN: Nothing but this could have kept me from utter Ruin.
To my Shame and Confusion, I must acknowledge, that since thou, by thy victorious [Page 81] Grace, hast shewn me the Emptiness of all sublunary Enjoyments, and by the magnetic Influence of thy Love, drawn me to thy self, as my only essential Happiness, and Soulsatisfying Portion; my foolish Heart has been wandering from my God, and too inordinately attach'd to Creature Enjoyments. O! with what Self-loathing and Abhorrence, have I Reason to look back upon my past Life, and bitterly to mourn for all the Faults and Follies that have attended it; even my best Duties are filled with Sin and Imperfection. I desire earnestly to deprecate the severe Enquiry of thy Justice; and cry out with the penitent Publican, God be merciful to me a Sinner!
AND how hath every Fault been aggravated by the infinite, inexpressible Obligations I am under to thy distinguishing Grace! How justly mightest thou have punished my Folly with the severest Corrections; and with-held, those Influences, which I have so often misimproved!—But, Glory be to thy Name, than instead of this, thou hast followed me with thy gracious Visits, thro' all the various Stages and Circumstances of Life; and by thy powerful Attraction, hast still caused my foolish and fluctuating Heart, to point strongly to thee, the only Source, and Center [Page 82] of all my Happiness! I never found Rest, but in thy Self, O my God, and heavenly Father! Thou art my only Portion in the Land of the Living;—my Comfort in the obscurest Retirement;—my unfailing Friend in a strange Land;—my sure Defence in Times of the greatest Danger. Thou hast been my Health in Sickness;—my Strength in Weakness;—my Light in Darkness;— my dwelling Place, my strong Rock, my Refuge, from my Youth up.
HOW often have I been assaulted by they Corruptions of Flesh and Blood, and the Principalities and Powers of the Kingdom of Darkness; when I my self had no Strength for the Battle; no Power to resist my numberless and powerful Adversaries! but thou didst strengthen me with Strength in the inward Man, and prevent me from falling, a weak and defenceless Prey, into their destructive Hands.
LET the set my Seal, to thy Covenant Faithfulness and Love; thou hast caused me to approach unto thee, thro' thy beloved Son;— to look up to Jesus, my Almighty Saviour, and lay hold on his Strength and Righteousness; and in his Name, and under his Conduct, [Page 83] I have been enabled, so far to get the Conquest, that every Asault hath engaged me more strongly to depend on my Almighty Leader; and the hellish Legions have been disappointed, and put to Flight:—Sin hath appeared more vile, and Christ more precious, under all my Trials and Difficulties. Christ hath' been my Strength, and Safety;—my Intercessor and Advocate. I have found him at all Times, the Way, the truth, and the Life.
O! ASTONISHING Grace, and Goodness, to the Worst of Sinners!—I am nothing in my self, but Christ is ALL IN ALL;—He is my inexhausted Treasure, my perpetual Support, my continual Feast, the only Foundation of my Hope and Joy;—upon him I depend for Perseverance to the End, that neither Life nor Death, may separate me from his Love. I undertake no Part, in my own Strength; — the Work is all thine; the Motives, are altogether in thy Self: Had the Motives been any good Thing in me, then a Failure upon my Part would have forfeited all. But the Work of the Lord is perfect;—thy Good-Will is immutable, he that hath laid the Foundation, will also lay the Top Stone, with shouting, crying, Grace, Grace unto it.
[Page 84]GLORY BE TO THE ALMIGHTY FATHER! who hath parted with his Son out of his Bosom, to be the Atonement for our Sins; and by his all-conquering Grace, hath enabled me to receive him, as my Saviour and my Lord.
GLORY BE TO THE ETERNAL SON! for his righteous Life, his bitter Death, glorious Resurrection, and continual Intercession for us.
GLORY BE TO THE HOLY GHOST! proceeding from the Father and the Son, by whose Agency, we are enabled to think every good Thought, to perform any good Action, and are seal'd up to the Day of Redemption, Amen.
Morning ASPIRATIONS.
O MY GOD, and heavenly Father in Jesus Christ! I am unworthy to lift up my guilty Face to Heaven, or appear in the Presence of an holy God. In my self, I am insufficient for a good Thought: But thou, in thy meer Grace, hast not only permitted, but commanded thy poor indigent Creatures, to come to thy glorious Majesty, in the Name, and for the Sake of thy dear Son, in whom it hath pleased the Father, that all Fullness should dwell, for all needed Good, both spiritual and temporal, Especially for that Summary of all Good, the purchased, promised, Spirit of thy Grace.
O MY GOD! permit and enable thy poor, impotent, and sinful Creature, to prostrate my self before thy glorious Majesty, under a most abasing Sense of my utter Inability, to perform this, or any other Duty,in an acceptable Manner. Allow me to say, that all the Qualifications, to which thy gracious Promises are annex'd, must come from thy self, even the Disposition to ask for them in a right [Page 86] Manner. The Preparation of the Heart in Man, and the Answer of the Tongue, is from the Lord. I desire therefore, in the Name and Strength of my victorious Advocate, and dear Redeemer, to ask for that Repentance, Faith, Love, Fervency, Perseverance, and every other holy Disposition, to which thy Promises are annex'd: The Fire of Devotion must be enkindled at thine Altar, or else it will never ascend to thy Throne. O that, there may be a blessed Intercourse, between thy glorious Majesty, and my Soul, this Day, all my Days, even to my Life's End! Let the Flame of Devotion ever ascend, from the Altar of a broken and contrite Heart! May I be enabled in all the Changes, Troubles, Temptations,Trials, Diversions, and Business of Life, so to conduct my self, as may tend most to thy Glory, and the Salvation of my own Soul, according to the boundless Riches of free Grace in Jesus Christ, Amen.
II. O! MY GOD, AND HEAVENLY FATHER! to thee do I cry, when my Heart is overwhelm'd within me. O that thou wouldest lead me to the Rock that is higher than I! Thou hast commanded thy helpless Creatures, to lay hold on thy Strength, that they may make Peace with thee. But thou, O Lord! alone, can'st incline, and enable us so to do.—I come to thee therefore, and earnestly beg, that thou would'st give me Grace to order my Requests aright before thee; and now, and at all Times, to do the Things, which are well-pleasing in thy Sight.
O! MY dear Redeemer, my glorious and ascended Advocate! when thou wast upon Earth, thou did'st graciously invite, all poor, miserable, and burthened Souls, to come to thee, that they might have Rest. And the Invitation still remains upon Record in full Force, for the Incouragement of Mankind in all Ages, to apply to thee, under the insupportable Weight of their innumerable Sins and Sorrows, for all desirable Succour and Relief.
[Page 88]O GOD! who surveyest the whole Creation, and from whom no secret Tho't can be hid: Thou knowest the bitter Grief, and distressing Sorrow, with which my Soul is borne down, and under which I should inevitably sink, if not supported by thy gracious Hand. I am oppress'd with a burdensome Sense, of the ruinous Circumstances of human Nature by the Apostacy, and that Train of Miseries, which are the sad Consequences of it.
THOU, O gracious God, and merciful Redeemer! art the only Restorer of our ruined Race, the only Repairer of our Breaches. I desire to come at thy gracious Invitation, and bring my self, and my Children, and lay them at thy blessed Feet. Thou knowest who of us, thou hast translated out of the Kingdom of Sin and Satan, into the glorious Liberty of the Children of God, and who of us still remain under the tyrannical Slavery of the Prince of Darkness. Do thou visit us with thy Favour; and make every one of us the Objects of thy distinguishing Love.
THOU hast opened a Fountain, in thy Gospel, for Sinners of all Orders, to wash in from Sin and Uncleanness.—Thou art inviting us to wash and be clean.—O that thou would'st engage us all to comply with thy kind Proposals!—
[Page 89]WHEN thou commandedst the poor impotent Man, to stretch out his withered Hand, then thou gavest him Power to obey, and he was immediately made perfecly whole. And if thou wilt now speak the effectual Word, and enable me to obey thy divine Call, and to come to thee with all my Wants and Miseries; I shall be more sure of Success, than of any Matter of Sense whatever. For when thou sayest, that no Man can come to the Son, but whom the Father draweth, thou at the same Time declarest, that whosoever cometh, shall be in no wise cast out.
O MY GOD! the Invitations of thy Gospel are inconceivably great, gracious and free, without any Prohibition or Bounds; address'd to all, in the most extensive Forms of Expression! Ho! every one that thirsteth, come; and whosoever will, let him come, and drink of the Waters of Life freely. And the Condition on which I am to receive these inconceivable Blessings, is only a thankful Acceptance; they are offered without Money, and without Price.
O! SOUL-RAVISHING, and transporting Sound! How exacly suited to my hungry, thirsty, and necessitous Circumstances! Encouraged [Page 90] by these thy free and generous. Offers, I desire to cast my self and Posterity, at thy adorable Feet; for all the important Blessings we stand in Need of, temporal, spiritual and eternal. I have nothing of my own to bring with me, for every good Inclination or Desire, is the Effect of thy Grace, and encreases my Oligations.
I DESIRE, with a deep and filial Sorrow, to confess my Original Sin, that Fountain of all Corruption. Behold! I was shapen in Sin, and in Iniquity did my Mother conceive me. I desire humbly to bewail all my actual Transgressions, in every Period and Station of Life. I desire more particularly, to abhor my self, for all my Faults and Follies, since thou wast pleased to discover to me, the Excellency of Christ, and his Ways, and lead me to acquiesce in him, as my only and all-sufficient Saviour, my supreme and eternal Portion.
O! HOW often hath my careless and backsliding Heart, wandered from thee, the Fountain of living Waters, the original Source of Happiness, to the unsatisfying Streams of Creature Comforts.
BUT ador'd be thy Grace, thou hast not suffer'd me to rest in any Thing short of thy [Page 91] self; but hast by all thy Dispensations, more and more wean'd my Heart from these deceitful Vanities. I desire now to look unto thee, O my glorious Redeemer! as the Beginning, Model, and End of all my Salvation; and depend upon thee for all those Mercies, which are necessary for me and mine, for Time and Eternity. Amen and Amen.
III.
O MY GOD! by thy undeserved and sparing Goodness, I am once more brought to the Light of another Morning; surrounded with innumerable Mercies: I desire, with Humility and Gratitude, to offer up my Morning Sacrifice, of Adoration, Praise, and Thanksgiving; — with unfeigned Sorrow for all the ungrateful Returns, which I have made for thy innumerable Favours; — with a strong Faith in thy glorious Majesty, to enable me, to reform what has been amiss, for the future.
BUT, O! how incapable am I, to perform this of my self, if not excited and supported by thy Grace! How certainly shall I depart from thee, and run into the Practice of innumerable Follies! — I desire therefore earnestly to beg for the continual Supplies of divine Strength. I would bring this dead, stupid, [Page 92] unthankful, unbelieving, unfruitful Heart, to thee; most humbly beseeching thee, to possess it by thy Spirit; adorn it with every Christian Grace, and preserve it from every defiling and hurtful Evil.
THIS is what my Soul earnestly longs for;—then shall I be enabled to make such an Offering, as thou with accept in Jesus Christ.—To whom, with thy glorious Majesty, and Blessed Spirit of Grace, the Comforter, be ever rendered, with my whole Soul, Blessing, Honour, Glory, and Power, from this Time, and forever, Amen.
IV.
O THOU great Creator of all Things! Thou, only Lord and Proprietor of the Universe!—Thou God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, and in and thro' him, the God of all Grace and Consolation! So great, so awful, so inexpressibly glorious and perfect a Being art thou, and I so vile, guilty, and polluted a Worm of the Dust; that I dare not have come into thy Presence, or mentioned thy tremendous Name, hadst thou not commanded us to approach unto thee; and invited lost and self-ruined Creatures, even such as have no Worthiness of their own, to [Page 93] apply to the Throne of thy Grace, for all the Blessings they stand in Need of;—yea, thou hast assured us, that whatever Requests we put up agreeable to thy Will, in the Name of Christ, thou wilt hear and answer.—
O MY GOD! since I am thus permitted to draw near unto thy gracious Majesty; wilt thou be pleased to draw near unto me, and afford me thy Blessing and Presence; that I may ask those Things that are agreeable to thy Will, with Humility, Faith and Fervency! that so they may be favourably received, and graciously answered, thro' Jesus Christ.
IS it not, O my God, and heavenly Father! agreeable to thy Will, that all thy Creatures should obey thy righteous Commandments? — Certainly it is: — Have I not then a Warrant from thy Divine Majesty, to pray for that Grace and Strength, by which I may be inclined and enabled to perform this Obedience.
IT is therefore agreeable to thy Will, that I should receive the Offers of the Gospel, be renewed in the Spirit of my Mind, conform'd to the Image of God; and in order to this, should pray, for the Agency of thy blessed Spirit, which only can qualify me to do any [Page 94] good Thing;—and intercede with thee, that thy Kingdom may come, and thy Will be done on Earth, as it is in Heaven. These are Things which thou hast commanded me to do; and therefore I am sure, are agreeable to thy holy Will.
THESE, O my God! (allow me to say) are the Sum and Substance of all my Wishes for my self and Posterity, to the End of Time. O! when shall the Time come, when our great Redeemer shall triumph in this miserable Earth; and bring all Nations, Tongues and Languages, to a chearful Subjection to his mild and righteous Government!
O THOU! who seest the secret Recesses of our Souls, and all the dark Labyrinths of Unbelief, Impenitence, Ingratitude, Rebellion, and Perverseness; with all the deplorable Train, of Ignorance and Error, Sins and Follies, which we thy corrupted Creatures are by Nature involved in.—I acknowledge we are unworthy of the Air we breath in, and the Earth we tread upon: It is of thy Mercy, that we are not consumed, and because thy Compassions fail not, that we are not cut down as Cumberers of thy Ground. Yet being authorised and encouraged, by thy glorious Majesty, [Page 95] to come with humble Freedom and Boldness, to the Throne of thy Grace, for the Supply of all our Wants. — I desire now, and at all Times, to improve this invaluable Privilege, to prostrate my self before thee; and resolve here to lie, with the most importunate Cries, pleading for free Mercy, for my self and Children,
LOOK down in infinite Compassion, upon our dark, bewildered, guilty, polluted Natures. Behold with Pity, what endless Disorder and Confusion, [...] hath wrought in those Souls, which were once adorned with thine Image, and happy in thy Favour. Speak the all-commanding Word, and Darkness shall give Place to Light;—the Beauties of Holiness shall succeed in the Room of the Deformity and Defilements of Sin. Issue out thy sovereign Orders, that all thine Enemies, and the Enemies of our Souls, may be brought out, and slain before thee. Let the Kingdom of Satan be entirely demolished, and the Kingdom of thy SON, be established upon the Ruins of his accursed Empire. O! that every rebellious Thought might be brought down, and subdued unto the Obedience of Faith!
[Page 96]MAY I not appeal to thee, O thou Searcher of Hearts! that it is the great and governing Desire of my Soul, that thou wouldest be pleased, to look down in Mercy upon these disordered Natures,—these miserable and polluted Cottages, and fit them up for thy self, make them Temples of the Holy Ghost, and then come and take up thy Dwelling in them.
THY Presence I invite into my Soul, as the Sum of all my Happiness: Thou knowest O my God! that I should look upon the whole Creation, as a dark and disordered Scene, if not enlightned with the refreshing Rays of thy Love; and that I despise all its Glories, Riches and Pleasures, as contemptible Dross, in Comparison with the Smiles of thy Countenance! It is thou, O everlasting JEHOVAH! that I choose and desire, for the all-sufficient Portion of me and mine, in all Generations. For this boundless and inconceivable Blessing, may I be enabled, in the Exercise of a lively Faith, to wait and pray.
WILL thy glorious Majesty, be pleased of thy infinite Grace, to remember us with the Favour which thou bearest to thy People, and visit us with thy SALVATION! O that thou wouldest shed abroad thy LOVE, in all our [Page 97] Hearts, in a most plentiful Manner! O! that all the Powers, Affections, and Passions of our Souls, maybe at all Times plac'd on their proper Objects, and be employed in the Service, and for the Glory of their divine Original! Search and try us, O our God, and subdue every evil Way in us, and lead us in the Way everlasting.—Triumph over every Thing within us, that exalteth it self, against the Grace and Government of the most High God. Let our Souls, at all Times, be filled and possess'd, with God-exalting, Christ-exalting, Sin-abhorring, Self-abasing, Worlddespising Thoughts. Let every unworthy Apprehension, of the Supreme Being be removed, and every latent Prejudice, against the Equity and Goodness of his Ways, be conquered.
O FATHER, LORD of Heaven and Earth! Let thy Kingdom come, and thy Will be done, as fully, absolutely and unreservedly, in our Souls, and in the universal World, as it is done in Heaven. O! when shall the happy Day dawn, that thou wilt give to thy Son, the Heathen for his Inheritance, and uttermost Ends of the Earth for his Possession? When the glad Tydings of Salvation, shall spread from Pole to Pole; and the numerous Nations [Page 98] who now sit is Darkness, and in the Shadow of Death, shall be enlightned, with the Knowledge of God, and of his Christ. Come, Lord Jesus, come quickly!
O MY GOD, pardon and forgive, hear and answer, according to our various Wants and Necessities, according to the unsearchable Riches of thy Grace in Christ Jesus.
I DESIRE to conclude, with one earnest Petition more, as the Summary of all the rest; which our Blessed Saviour, hath commanded us to make, and given us abundant Encouragement of Success, in those reviving Words, Ask, and it shall be given you: Seek, and ye shall find: Knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh, receiveth; and he that seeketh, findeth; and to him that knocketh, it shall be opened. Or, what Man is there of you, whom if his Son ask Bread, will he give him a Stone? Or if he ask a Fish, will he give him a Serpent? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good Gifts unto your Children; how much more shall your Father which is in Heaven, give the Holy Spirit to them that ask it.
DIRECTED by thy Command, encouraged by this gracious Promise; I earnestly pray [Page 99] that it would please thy adorable Majesty, to spread abroad thy blessed Spirit of Grace, the Sanctifier and Comforter, in plentiful Effusions, upon me, my Children, Grand-Children, and all my Family, Friends, Relations, Acquaintance, Benefactors and Enemies; and upon the whole World of Mankind, for Christ's Sake; To whom, with thy glorious Majesty, and the Eternal Spirit, be ever ascribed, Blessing, Praise, Thanksgiving, Dominion and Power, now and evermore, Amen.
V.
SINCE the Glory of GOD, and the Salvation of my own Soul, is the only Affair of Consequence; and the Holy Scriptures are the only Rule to direct, how we may secure this important Concern: I now resolve by the Grace of GOD, (without which, I can perform no Duty in a right Manner;) that I will, as my Time and Opportunity permits, write down the most remarkable Passages I meet with in my daily Reading; for my Instruction and Comfort, in the ensuing Day. And that I may so read as to understand the Meaning of the blessed Spirit, I will lift up my Heart to GOD THE FATHER, the Fountain of all Good, that of his infinite Mercy, [Page 100] he would send down, the enlightning, renewing, and inlivening Influences of his Spirit, into my Heart.—TO GOD THE SON, that he would execute his Prophetic Office, in teaching me clearly to understand, and firmly to believe, all the grand and sublime Mysteries of the CHRISTIAN RELIGION: And that by his Priestly Sacrifice, he would make Atonement for all my Breaches of his Holy Laws; and by his Kingly-Power, bring my whole Soul to an unreserved Subjection to them.—To GOD THE HOLY GHOST, that he would sanctify and apply all the glorious Truths, and beautiful Precepts, therein contained to my Heart: That I may be enabled to persevere in Holiness, and press forward to Perfection, till Grace shall be compleated in Glory.
AND that it may be really and truly so, I desire, this Morning, by the Assistance of the Blessed Spirit, to renew my Covenant with this ONE GOD, Father, Son and Holy Ghost; and humbly desire, with a fiducial Confidence, in my good and gracious God, to commit to the Custody, and devote to the Service, of his Divine Majesty, all I have, and all I am, for Time and Eternity; with a firm Dependance, O! my gracious and [Page 101] Covenant-keeping GOD! that thou wilt conduct me by thy Spirit, lead me into all Truth, and preserve me from all Manner of Evil.
I DEPEND wholly upon the Strength of thine omnipotent Arm, to fulfil all thy Works in me, for it is by thy mighty Power, that any are kept unto eternal Salvation.
AND now, my Soul, that thou mayst live agreeable to thy Privileges and Obligations, it is necessary, that the Fire of the Morning Sacrifice, should be kept alive by devout. Ejaculations, in the midst of all the Business, and Occurrences of the Day. For the Grace to perform one Duty, is not sufficient for another; but with David, our Eyes must forever be unto the Lord, we must look up for continual Supplies, in every Time of Need. To live in this Way is to live indeed;—then we maintain, a constant Intercourse, between God and our Souls; and enjoy a Nearness to God in Christ Jesus; in which Nearness, consists all our Safety and Happiness.
O, MY GOD! whose Prerogative alone it is to give Faith, enable me now, and at all Times, to cast Anchor, within the Vail, whither my Fore-runner is entered; that I may [Page 102] be kept steadfast to God, and my Duty, notwithstanding all the Dangers to which I am exposed, in this stormy and tempestuous World.
O MY GOD! I desire this Morning, with humble Thankfulness, to acknowledge, the innumerable Mercies of my Life, in every Stage, Situation, and Circumstance. From the Moment of my Conception; from the Time when I hung on my Mother's Breast, to the present Day, my Life hath been filled with Mercy. When I look all around me, I find my Self surrounded with Mercies; Food, Raiment, and a comfortable Place of Abode, a great Degree of Health and Strength, and the Use of my intellectual Faculties.—
THOU hast bestowed upon me, O my GOD! the Powers of Reason and Recollection, by which I am enabled to contemplate the Perfections of the Supreme Being, and to see the visible Foot-steps of thy Wisdom, Power and Goodness, which are instamp'd on all the Works that thou hast made.
BUT, O my God! I must humbly make my sorrowful Complaint, that altho' I know [Page 103] all this, and in some Measure feel the Weight of my Obligations to thy glorious Majesty; yet I have an ungrateful Heart, prone to backslide from thee. Were the noble Powers and Faculties, of the Soul, if thoroughly sanctified, and consecrated to thy Service, how happy should I live? How serene and peaceable a State should I continually enjoy? But now I am compelled to cry out, O miserable Creature, that I am, who shall deliver me from this Body of Sin and Death!
MAY I not have Leave, O my God! with humble Confidence to say, I am instructed where to go, with good Ground to hope for Success. My dear Redeemer hath bidden me to pray, that thy Kingdom may come, and thy Will be done, in Earth as it is in Heaven: And if this Petition, which our glorious Lord hath put into our Mouths, be granted, all Things will be essentially and eventually right; the Want of this is all our Misery.
THE Heart of Man in its original Purity, was a glorious Temple, a Palace designed for the Residence of the most HIGH GOD. His Kingdom was set up there; His Image was engraven upon our Nature;— But Woe unto [Page 104] us that we have sinned.—By this the Spirit of God was affronted and banish'd, and Satan usurped the Throne of our Hearts. What a dreadful Havock, hath the Enemy made in this once glorious Palace!
O MY GRACIOUS GOD! I humbly beseech thee to look down in much Mercy, upon these desolated Ruins! How are all our Powers depraved and vitiated! How doth Satan carry the natural Man Captive, and transform him into a Slave to every vile and unprofitable Lust! O set thy Creatures free from this infamous Servitude;—restore our ruin'd Nature; sanctify those Faculties, which under the Conduct of thy Grace, are admirably suited, to bring Honour to their Almighty Maker, and advance their own Perfection and Happiness.
O, MY GOD! I humbly beseech thee, for the Sake of my dear Redeemer, now and at all Times to bestow upon me, thy Grace, that I may offer up such Petitions and Requests, as thou wilt graciously hear and answer; and such Dispositions of Soul, as thou wilt be pleased with. On thee do I wait all the Day long; the constant Aspirations of my Soul, shall be to thee. I will look unto [Page 105] thee; O, my GOD! even when thou hidest thy Face, and wait for thee, O! may I be enabled at all Times, and under all Circumstances, to do so in an acceptable Manner, to my Life's End, for my Redeemer's Sake: To whom, with the Father, and holy Spirit, be Honour and Glory, Dominion and Power now and ever more. Amen.
VI.
O my Soul, why art thou cast down, and why so disquieted, upon any Account? Why do I not say fiducially, Hope thou in God, for thou shalt yet praise him, for the Help of his Countenance. Surely there must be some grand Defect, in that Faith, Love, and holy Confidence, which thy God may justly expect from one, on whom he hath bestow'd so many signal and distinguishing Favours. Thy temporal Mercies, O GOD! have been great and numerous; repeated swift as the Moments fly, and continued to the present Time. And tho' those are great in themselves, and much more so, when I consider, how by my Sins I have forfeited all Good; and am become obnoxious to every Evil: Yet they are small when compared with those inconceivably greater Blessings,—The Gift of thy Son;—the Operations of thy Spirit.
[Page 106]HATH not thy God, enabled thee to say;—Thou art he whom my Soul longeth for. When shall it once be, that all the Powers of my Body, and Faculties of my Soul, will be wholly, and without Interruption, employed in thy Service, and to thy Glory! Are not these certain Indications, of a divine Birth,—a new Creation; which could not be produced by any other Hand than that which at first created all Things. And I desire to depend upon the same Almighty Power, to finish that Work which thou hast begun. And as I received all from thee, so I owe all to thee, and desire to dedicate all to thee, renouncing all Dependance upon myself, trusting entirely to the Strength and Grace of the Redeemer. I desire more constantly and uninterruptedly, to lift up my Soul to thee, by constant ejaculatory Aspirations; and to commit myself to thee, as Wax to the Seal, that thou wouldest form me into thy own Resemblance, and fit me for the Service and Enjoyment of thy Self: As I desire to depend upon thee for Strength, so I desire to trust only in the Righteousness of Christ for Justification.
HERE I venture my All for Time and Eternity. Upon this Foundation I sat out, in the Christian Race, when I was young; [Page 107] And upon a Review of the Conduct of God towards me, in my whole Life, I have reason to set my Seal, that God is true to all his Promises;— that all his Ways, are Ways of Pleasantness, and all his Paths are Peace.
IN thy Strength, O my gracious and merciful Father! I resolve to persist in this Way, and lie waiting at the Footstool of thy Grace.—If I perish, I will perish here:—To whom else should I go, thou only hast the Words of Eternal Life. Amen.
VII.
LIFT up your Heads, O ye Gates! and be lift up, ye everlasting Doors! and the KING OF GLORY shall come in.
I DESIRE, O my God! to acknowledge with the highest Thankfulness and Gratitude, thy unparalell'd and condescending Grace, to sinful and rebellious Mankind. That when by Sin, he had affronted the infinite Majesty of Heaven, and caused thee to withdraw thy favourable Presence from him; yet that thou who art the KING OF KINGS, should contrive to restore the human Race again to thy Favour, and art inviting us to the most intimate Communication with thy self: Knocking at the Door of our Hearts; demanding Admittance, [Page 108] by the external Calls of thy Word, and the internal Operations of thy Spirit.—
THE Terms of our entertaining so divine a Guest, are the most advantageous, that can be imagined. We are required to open the Doors of our Hearts, and give him a joyful Admission; and resign ourselves to be governed by his just and righteous Laws.— What can be more reasonable and serviceable? In keeping God's Commandments there is great Reward: And all will find that it is true, who make the happy Experiment.
AND if the Conditions are so advantageous, What is the Blessing it self!—Here, O my Soul! I am lost in a Croud of Thoughts; I have no Words adequate to my Conceptions, and my Conceptions fall infinitely short, of the Excellency of the Subject they are employed about. If I consider the wide Destruction, which Sin hath brought upon our Frame, which from a beautiful Habitation of the most High, is turned into a Receptacle of every base and unclean Lust: How justly may my Head be Waters, and my Eyes Fountains of Tears, to weep for the affecting Alteration! When I consider, the melancholly State of this lower World, by Reason of the Fall of Man, I [Page 109] may say, At this my Belly trembles, an Heart is removed out of its Place. Horrotakes hold of me, because of the Wicked, that forsake thy Law. As to my self, upon the srictest Search, I think I can say, that the Remains of Sin in me, are the greatest Burden I feel, and the only Thing that makes Life bitter to me. If the Absence of the glorious God be so dreadful, how inconceiveably reviving must be the Return of this blessed Inhabitant!
To approach unto thee, O my God! is all my Happiness, in the Present and future World: May I therefore never admit, any Thing into my Heart and Memory, that shall be affronting to thy blessed Spirit! May I always endeavour by every Means, to lift up the Doors of my Soul, and invite the Presence of this sacred Guest. It is thy Demand, Son give me thy Heart: Give me Power, I beseech thee, unfeignedly to obey thy Voice. Favour me with thy unerring Guidance, to lead me in that Way, which is for the Glory, of thy Name, and the Salvation of my Soul; for my dear Redeemer's Sake: To whom, with the Father, and Holy Spirit, be ascribed all Honour and Glory Dominion and Power, Amen.
COVENANT ENGAGEMENTS.
THY Vows are upon me, O God! I will render Praises unto thee.
For thou hast delivered my Soul from Death; wilt not thou deliver my Feet from fatting; that I may walk before God; in the Light of the Living, Ps.lvi.12.13.
BE merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me, for my Soul trusteth in thee: Yea, in the Shadow of thy Wings, will I make my Refuge, until these Calamities be overpast.
I will cry unto God most High, unto God that performeth all Things for me. Ps.lvii.1.2.
I.
O MOST merciful and glorious God, the FATHER, the SON, and the HOLY-GHOST. I desire to dedicate without Reserve, all I am, and all I have, to thee, to whom of Right I belong; imploring thy continual Assistance, that I may employ my Time and Talents, in thy Service, to the End of my Life,—That I may take thy Word for my Rule, thy Glory for my ultimate End, and in all my Actions advance the Kingdom of thy Grace.
[Page 111]I TAKE God the FATHER, for my God and Father,— JESUS CHRIST for my Lord and Redeemer,—the HOLY SPIRIT for my Sanctifier and Redeemer. And resolve, by thy Grace, that I will hate Nothing but Sin, that I will take Pleasure in Nothing but what is agreeable to thy Will. And I beseech my glorious God, that he would increase my Faith, enflame my Love, and invigorate my Desires, after a greater Conformity to, and Acquaintance with my dear Redeemer, and give me a more full and absolute Submission to the Dispensations of thy unerring Providence.
BLESS, the Lord, O my Soul! for the daily and common Mercies with which thou art surrounded. Bless him above all for redeeming Love, the never failing Spring of Grace and Goodness; in Jesus Christ the true Believer possesses all Things: A well grounded Hope of an Interest in his Merits, is a continual Feast, and inspires the Soul with that happy Peace and Tranquility, which infinitely exceeds the most delightful Pleasures of Sense. This, and this alone, gives the Soul an Happiness independent of the whole World of Creatures, which accompanies it where-ever it goes, and supports it under the most distressing Bereavements. [Page 112] —It enables it to say, with the Psalmist, The Lord lives, and blessed be my Rock, and exalted be the God of my Salvation. And with the Prophet, Tho' the Fig Tree do not blossom, and there be no Fruit in the Vine; yet will I rejoice in the Lord, and joy in the God of my Salvation.
II.
O GOD! thou art the Almighty Creator, the continual Preserver, the bountiful Benefactor, supreme Lord and Proprietor, of all Things visible and invisible. Thou art the only worthy Object of my Admiration, Adoration and Fear: And in and thro' Jesus Christ, the delightful Object of my Love, Complacency and Confidence. It is therefore, not only my indispensable Duty, but highest Happiness and Safety, to consecrate my self, in the most solemn Manner, to the ever blessed TRINITY, in whose Name, I was baptized, and to whose Service I was devoted in my Infancy.
ADORED be thy Name, that I have been enabled from my Youth up, to take these my baptismal Bonds upon my self, and solemnly to renew my Covenant Dedication. O my God! forgive the Iniquity of my Holy Duties, and sprinkle all my Covenant Transaction with the Blood of Jesus.
[Page 113]IF I have ever been sincere, in these my solemn Approaches to thy gracious Majesty, it was because thou, of thy Free Grace, didst make me so;—To thee therefore, be the Glory, Honour, Thanksgiving and Praise,—but to me belongs Shame and Confusion of Face. I should never have unfeignedly return'd to thee, the Lord my God, hadst thou not drawn me, by the constraining Charms of thy Grace and Love; and effectually convinc'd me of the Vanity and Insufficiency of every Creature, to satisfy the boundless Cravings of my immortat Soul. And didst not thou, by the Illuminations of thy Spirit, lead me to the Redeemer, upon whose Account alone, I could possibly expect Pardon and Acceptance, Strength and Assistance.
AND now, what Words can I take to express my Thankfulness and Gratitude, for thy distinguishing Mercies: I desire humbly to bewail all my Ingratitude to thee the God of all Grace and Consolation.—How often have I grieved thy Holy Spirit,'by my careless and inattentive Conduct, notwithstanding all the endearing Obligations, thou hast laid me under! When I review my Life I find that in many Things I have [Page 114] offended thee, my heavenly Father; and in all Things have fallen short of my Duty to God and my Fellow-Creatures;—All my Faults have been attended with this great Aggravation, that they were a Violation of my solemn Vows and Covenant Engagements.
How just and equitable is the Apostle's Exhortation, I beseech you therefore, Brethren, by the Mercies of God, that you present your Bodies a living Sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable Service. How criminal and sacrilegious is every Deviation from my Covenant Vows; every Departure from my rightful Lord and Master.
I BLESS thy glorious Majesty, that thou hast not punished me according to my Iniquities, nor taken away from me thy forfeited Blessings. But that thou art still continuing to me the Strivings of thy Holy Spirit, and hast so far overcome the natural Depravity of my Heart, that Sin is my greatest Aversion; thy Service my highest Delight: That my Hopes and Fears, Desires and Delights, my supreme Choice and Affection, centers in the living and unchangeable God. O! that it were more perfectly so!—If thou art my Portion, I shall certainly be happy, tho' destitute of every Thing else. If thou with-holdest [Page 115] thy Favour, I must be inexpressibly miserable, tho' plac'd in the Bosom of Heaven itself.
UNDER a deep Conviction of these Things, I desire again to renew, the Dedication of my self unto thee. But what have I now to offer, but what is thine already, by the most indisputable Title, and the strongest Obligations. I would give up my Heart unto thee, O my God! it being the best Offering I have to make; humbly praying. That thou wouldest be pleased to take it, into thine own Hand, and form it for thy self. Kindle within it, such a Flame of divine Love, as shall destroy every other Affection, which stands in Competition with thee. To thee therefore, O almighty Sovereign, and heavenly Father! To thee, O compassionate Advocate and Redeemer! To thee, O eternal Guide and Comforter of thy Church, do I dedicate my self and my Children, in an EVERLASTING COVENANT never to be broken. Resolving to wait at the Footstool of Free Grace, for those divine Communications, which are necessary to enable me to live more entirely to thy Glory; and finally, to make me meet for the Inheritance of the Saints in Light. I desire to have my entire Dependance upon my dear Redeemer;—his Strength for the Performance; [Page 116] his Merit for the Acceptance of these my Covenant Engagements.
IF there has been any Thing in the Transactions of this Day, that is the Breathing of thy holy Spirit, be pleased to hear, answer and accept it; and every Thing of my own, pity and pardon. O my gracious God! hear my Cry, attend to the Voice of my Requests, and do for me, for mine, and the the whole Israel of God, according to thy Covenant Faithfulness, and the Boundless Riches of thy Grace, in JESUS CHRIST OUR LORD.
To whom, with thy glorious Majesty, and eternal Spirit, be ascribed, as is most due, all Honour, Adoration and Praise, now and for ever more, Amen.