Mrs. PARLIAMENT BROUGHT TO BID Of the Precious Babe of REFORMATION.
RIde, run, goe, with all celerity, and fetch hither Mistris London the Midwife; tell her that Mrs. Parliament desires her to come away presently, for she is in strong labour, and hath most miserable pangs and throwes that come thick upon her; pray heavens she hath [Page 4] not taken some fright; I heard her the other day complaine of a Scotchman, and of an Irishman, and a Welchmen; Well, well, 'twas ill done, Ile besworne, to fright a Gentlewoman of her quallity and breeding, one that came of so ancient and Honorable a Family too, as the Parliaments of England? Who is it almost that has not known the Parliaments to be as honourable as ever was any Family in England (next the King, God bless him) and hath done as much good for the Kingdome: and now to be despised by every sause-boxe boy, and loose fellow to make Rimes as they call them, and sing-songs of her, making of her a Whore, and no better then the arrantest Strumpet that ever went upon two shooes, telling her, that she hath imprisoned her Husband, and prostituted her body to a very Eunuch, that had nothing to help himself withall; and since, hath followed the Camp, & became an Amunition-W, and turn'd up her tayle to every lowsy Ill-dependent Rascall in the Army; Sir Thomas himself, and king Cromwall too, a very Town-Bull, and committed flat fornication with Broom-men, Tinkers, and Channell-rakers, and hath learnt to murder, Rob, take Purses, pick pockets; but she is not the first Woman that hath done amiss, These are but slips occasioned by the weakness of her sex; Ile in and make her a Spirituall Cawdle to comfort her weak back; for I promise you, I doubt that she will have but an ill bargain on't. Mrs. Parliament; why Mrs. Parliament I say; how doe ye Mrs. Parliament; Will ye have a little Strong-waters, or a Cawdle to comfort ye?
Oh sick, sick; I must cast Nurse; pray reach me a bowle: 〉 hawe 〉hawe.〉....
Well said Mistris, fetch it up; up with it: Heaven bless me! What is't that looks so red Mistris?
Oh 'tis Blood, innocent blood, that hath lain in clodds congealed at my stomack this full 7 yeers; harke how lowd it cryes for vengeance? I never felt it before I came to Strafford, onely once since, at Canterbury; O Tomkins, O Challoner, Burley, &c. too well I understand that you suffered by my cruelty unjust deaths. 〈 awe.〉
'Tis well tis up; cast againe Mistris.
J will Nurse. 〈 awe, awe.〉 Oh, Oh, my heart is burst.
Lord Mistris, What is't that looks so yellow? is it Choller?
No Nurse, 'tis Gold, accursed gold; For the love of this J sold my God, my King, my Soul, committed Sacriledge, murder, and all manner of mischief. Awe........
What's this Mrs. that looks like Paper?
Oh Nurse, those are Ordinances, Votes, and Declarations; Pray hold my back hard Nurse, my heart will shiver to pieces else. awe, awe, sick sick.
What's this that comes so strongly up? Foh, how it stinks all the Kingdome over.
Oh Nurse! This is the accursed Declaration against my King, wherein He is so falsely flandered and reproach'd; Pray fling some hot Embers on't, and make all the haste you can to call Mrs. Sedition, Mrs. Schisme, Mrs. Toleration, and Mrs. Leveller, tell them, That if they come not presently, J shall miscarry of the sweet Babe of Reformation, that hath cost England so much money, blood and sweat.
J am gone: Here's the Midwise forsooth, mistris London.
Oh mistris London, helpe me now or J die; never did Parliament endure such bitter pangs; Oh, oh; J am ready to depart.
Depart in the Devills Name if thou wilt; thou shalt have no helpe of mind; J come to laugh at thy sorrow, more then to helpe thee; thou hast had too much of my helpe already, and that hath imboldened thee the more to play the Strumpet with security, and to prostitute thy Members to all manner of Wickedness and Uncleanness: No, languish still, till thou hast brought forth the bastard Jssue of thy own Lust thy own self, which was begot in obscenity, and shall be brought forth in iniquity for me; and may it prove as monstrous in its birth, and as fatall to it self, as it hath been ominous to others.
[Page 6]As soon she had made an end of speaking, in came rushing Mrs. Priviledge, Mrs. Ordinance, Mrs. Schisme, Mrs. Sedition, and Mrs. Toleration, who presently fell about their business; one held her hands, another her back, and a third her members▪ She being in this grievous agony (having no hopes to scape with life) desired Mrs. Truth to indite a bill to have her pray'd for; and that it be speedily sent by the Lord Mayjor to the severall Congregations within every their respective Parishes for her safe Deliverance, which most accurately she penned in form of a Declaration, in these word following.
The Declaration of Mrs. Parliament, lying very weak, and in most grievous pangs of child-bearing; and cannot be delivered.
WHatsoever dangers are threatned or feared, either by the great perplexity I am at this present in (or by reason of my manyfold sins that now in my weakness lie heavie upon my Conscience,) yet I have assurance, that if I confess and forsake them, I shall finde mercy;
Therefore I confess and acknowledge ( though not from the bottom of my heart) that for the space of these 7. Yeers I have been a most cruell murderer, not onely of bodyes but of soules; that I have perjur'd my self, first by my Oath of Allegiance, and secondly by my Solemne Covenant, wherein ( as in Hos. 1. 9.) I have spoken words swearing falsly in making a Covenant; And now Iudgement spingeth up (against me) like Hemlock in the furrows of the field; that I have most trayterously betrayed, and imprisoned my lawfull King, the Anointed of the Lord; that I have corrupted his Lawes, and turned iudgement to wormwood; that I have made Gods House and the Kings House a Den of thieves; that I have loved wickedness, and practised it; that no fear hath dehorted me from doing any thing ( but justice) that I have Robbed both God, and the King, and have not feared the one, nor honoured the other▪ that I have used all manner of Jugglings, Cousenage, Contradictions, and Equivocations; that my Religion hath been Rebellion, Murder, and Rapine; that I have, not onely coveted, but (by the instigation of the Devil, and [Page 7] against the Lawes of our Soveraign Lord King CHARLES) taken Stole and forceably carried away the Goods and Chattells of many thousands of his Majesties Loyall and obedient subjects; that I have made this Canaan of all happiness, a Golgotha, and field of Blood, and yoaked my fellow subjects to the pride, tyranny and Opression of my own Lust, and Ambition; in stead of Reforming J have Deformed, and in stead of repairing J have pulled down; Which hath occasioned all these miseries to fall upon me; My greatest grief of all being, that I know J have committed all this, and much more, but cannot Repent for the same; therefore the severall Ministers within the Cities of London and Westminster▪ and the late Lines of Communications, are desired upon the seventh day of May, (being Rogation Sunday) if I shall not be delivered before, to keep a Day of Humiliation, and Prating, that the heavy judgements that so inevitably threaten me, may be diverted: That so I may still Rule Reigne and Tyrannise over you, Parliament everlasting, Impositions, Assessments and Taxations without end.
But in the time this was witing, Mistris Parliament grew still worse and worse, and the good Wives made account she hand been drawing on, therefore Mistis Priviledge stepped unto her and spake as followeth.
Mrs. Pri. Dear Daughter, I perceive by thy Pulse beating, and by so much blood comming in thy face, that thou art not long liv'd; and it is a question whether the child thou now art in travell with, ever come forth in its right shape, or live to receive its Christendom; and although I have been the supporter and upholder of thee this 7 years day, and Priviledg'd thee in all thy Actions, though contrary to Truth▪ Religion, Law or Reason, yet I cannot priviledge thee from Dissolution; Therfore I desire thee to make thy Peace with God, and thy Conscience, which I perceive is much troubled; next I advise thee to restore all that thou hast fraudulently taken away, either from God, thy King, or thy Neighbour, and to repent of thy Periury [Page 8] and blod-shed, and heartily bewail thy self for the same, deliver thy Lord and Master out of Prison, and preserve him from the treacherous designes of Fairfax, Cromell, Ireton, Hammond, Rainsbrough, Ioyes, &c. (setting the first aside, who is neither fish, nor flesh, nor good red herring) a company of Schismatticall, broaken, Rakehells, Mechanicks, and loose fellows, that will have no Rule for their lives or Actions and yet must be Lords of Mis-rule, and have the Persons and Estates of a freebron People at the mercy of their hellish wills; O Mrs. Parliament, here is Mrs. Schism, and Mrs. Sedition hath too much mislead thee, and hath brought thee to all this shame and ignominy that is now justly fallen upon thee, and disgraced both thee, and thy Honourable House for ever, and how ugly will it appear in the Chronicles of after times? The Commons House of Parliament (that should be the Fountaine of Justice) a Common Bawdy house, to prostitute her members to all manner of uncleanness, Murder, Theft, Treason &c. that should be the members of Christ, pure, holy and undefiled, and blameless before God and man, which is now hatefull and odious to both; that whosoever, (whether Minister or other) doth but speak truth, or tell you of your faults, must be worried to the death by your Blood-hounds, and Walkers bitch Ione Ruggles, and the rest of the damn'd crue of Jaylors, Pursuivants, Roagus and Judases, that care not whom they betray for money:—
Whil'st she was speaking▪ the room was strangely overspread with darkness, the candles went out of themselves, and there was smelt noysome smells, and heard terrible thunderings, intermix'd with wawling of Catts, howling of Doggs, and barking of Wolves against the windows flew ill-boading screetch-Owles, Ravens and other ominous Birds of night, that strook a great terrour to the hearers; at the same time Mrs. Parliament, was miraculously delivered of a Monster of a deformed shape, without a head great goggle eyes, bloody hands growing out of both sides of its devouring panch, under the belly hung a large bagge, and the feet are like the feet of a Beare; if you purpose to see it, you must make haste; for it is now ready to adjourn to a new Plantation.
God save the King.