THE COMBAT OF Love and Friendship, A Comedy, As it hath formerly been presented by the Gentlemen of Ch. Ch. in OXFORD.
By ROBERT MEAD, sometimes of the same Colledge.
LONDON, Printed for M. M. G. Bedell, and T. Collins, at the Middle Temple Gate, Fleetstreet. 1654.
The Stationer to the Reader.
THe Scene is vanish'd, and with it, all encouragement to this musical part of humane Learning. I murmur not against any that sit at the helm, though Policy of State have formerly allow'd the exercise of these Recreations in time of Troubles, as a means to divert Tumultuary and Turbulent spirits, whose otherwise uncorrected heat would be employ'd to the distraction of the most considerable Affaires, and Persons of the Common Wealth.
My businesse is not to vindicate the Stage, but to present thee Reader with a Play, without swelling thy expectation, for it comes forth usher'd onely with the name of the Author in the Title Page, in which, it hath more ornament, then all the Silken Fillets of our Time can bestow upon it, he having been a Person, whose eminent and general Abilities have left him a character, pretious and honourable to our Nation.
Look not therefore upon this composition, but as at a stoop, when his youth was willing to descend from his then higher Contemplations.
I could say more in his honor, but he was so great a Lover of Humility in his life, that I almost fear, being dead, he may be displeased to hear his own worth remembred.
I have done; Reader, peruse at thy opportunity, this pasthume, and know, as the Authour would disdain to be angry with thy dislike if he were alive, so he would not stain his ingenuity to Court thee into his praise; The Publisher onely hath an ambition it may delight thee, whose design thou maist easily pardon.
Farewell.
The Actors Names.
- LYsander servant to Artemone.
- Theocles his friend her brother, servant to Ethusa.
- Philonax servant to Artemone, an admirer of himself.
- Melesippus Father to Artemone,
- Diarchus his brother.
- Pisistratus a foolish Captain.
- Lamprias a small Poet rivals, in love with Ethusa.
- Miserotos an Enemy of Love.
- Artemone a Lady first in love with
- Lysander, after with Philonax.
- Panareta a Lady in love with Lysander.
- Ethusa her sister a scornful Lady.
- Hyperia woman to Artemone.
- Eudora woman to Ethusa.
- Theocles his Page.
- Attendants.
THE COMBATE OF Love and Friendship.
ACT. 1.
SCEN. 1.
SCEN. II.
Who, Philonax?
Ha, ha, ha.—
Nay, but, I prethee, haste to his Opinion Concerning me.
SCEN. 3.
Hold Sir▪ tis Theocles, her Brother.
SCEN. 4.
I shall, Sir.
Madam I wait upon you.——
ACT. 2.
SCEN. 1.
HA, ha, ha, I have ee'n burst my self yonder with laughing▪ and am now forc't to retire for fear of my ribs; The most prodigious Contention about a Mistresse that e're I beheld: A Ballad-singer and a vext Constable I should take e'm for; but that I know the one to be a boysterously valiant Captain, and t'other a Gentleman abus'd into a Poet by his Mistresse: who, having for a long time courted her with verses only and Sonnets, is now injoyn'd by Her to speak nothing but Rime. The Captain being his Rival hath now provok't the Quarrel, he hath drawn his Faulchion, and wheeling about, lies at his Guard [Page 14] most fiercely, whiles my Riming Gentleman makes at him with a pair of Heroick Verses, which he again puts by with a warlike Oath or two: Such strange Passadoes there are between e'm, such Hermaphroditical Play; short sword and long verse, as I ne're saw the like. But here they come.
I say I'le fight what e're comes on't.
Nay good Captain be pacified; indeed it is not manly to challenge or beat another whom you know resolv'd not to fight agen: why you see he refuses your weapon: Alas he combates in another way; if you will make Amorous Sonnets with him, I know he will enter the Lists.
No! my Sword shall be my Pen, and I will print a bloodie Tragick Poem upon his flesh—————By this good steel I will.
Strong lines? strong halters: I'le beat this riming spirit out of you, and make you howl in pitiful prose. If ever I hear you pelting verses at my Mistresse window any more, I'le beat that inspired Pate: I will Sirrah, so that the discharg'd Chamber-pot shall be a work of Charitie, the urine being med'cinal.
Get you a Sword Changeling, and a good one too, or I'le crown your Cockscomb with a hollie twig as big as my arm, Ile make your brains so fluent, they shall be ready to flie out upon all occasions.
Ile ee'ne try what Armour of proof you have.
Hold, hold, shall I now tell you what you two are?
Yes, Mars, and Apollo.
A ridiculous pair of Cockscombs you are to quarrel, and violate all bonds of friendship: thus for a white face, a coy, disdainful woman, who for ought you know when you have done your best, will onely laugh at your follie: I would not have you expect to be so Generously miserable as to deserve Pitie.
Come, come, you onely speak this out of your own Aversenesse to all Love: she hath most affectionately ingag'd her self by several promises to one of us two; but finding us both, so equally deserving, cannot as yet finallie determine the partie.
Nay that's for certain none can husband bee▪ To fair Ethusa, unlesse I or Hee.
Here's nothing to be done with my Sword, and I scorn to kill him as he is, unarm'd. Prithee Miserotos we should be much bound to the discoverie of thy Justice, if thou couldst chalk us out a fair way of Decision.
Faith I can imagine none, you are so disproportionably qualified; unlesse putting it to the hazard of Lots. For you standing on tearms of Chivalrie, He of Poetrie; you for the point of your Sword, he of his pen, can never meet in fair Duel.
Why then Ile stand to Lots.
Nay then let her decide it; I know her judgement must prefer me, therefore I'le stand to no other Lotterie but her liking.
'Tis then agreed.———
Did ever men run thus out of their wits with love? nay and for one that gives e'm no Encouragement at all, the most contemptful abusive woman that ere was sued to. She appoints e'm their daies of visits, and then sits in state like some great Princess about to decide grave matters concerning the Commonwealth: [Page 16] They usually walk without ith' Hall, and converse with the Serving-men, till summon'd by her Gentlewoman, who being the Clark of the Court, presents their Petitions, their Amorous Papers of Verses, and takes their several Enditements 'gainst the next appearing.
Well, give me Libertie of soul, who's will take Beautie.
SCEN. 2.
Well! proceed;
A good Character.
If you love me, then shew it in this grant.
SCEN. 3.
I am content too, what thinks this sadder pair?
I bow to any thing you please to name.
And I to what Lysander doth agree.
I vow my faith t'observe it.
Is it a day of hearing then?
Yes; in troth this serious Courtship of Theocles had almost wrought a distemper upon me (for such I count all sadness) I hold him somewhat too worthy to be listed with that ridiculous Companie, else I had thought upon some humour for him too: But Ile lay no other punishment upon him besides a constant absence, till he hear my pleasure.
O Sister, as thou regard'st my Comfort, prithee let nothing passe from thee that may be at all distastful to him.
Well Sister, for your sake Ile studie a Carriage.
O Madam, yonder's your Brace of humours, as you call e'm, in the midst of the street quarrelling, but hither I imagine their course is bent.
When they come bring e'm in hither. Sister pray take your place, and learn by me how to entertain Suitors. It is not [Page 24] fit that these Men should call us Mistresses, and so confidently proffer their Services for nothing. I would not have e'm so hypocritical.
SCEN. 4.
SLave, Rascal, I'le beat thy Brains out with the hilt of my Sword.
How now? what Sawcie companions raise this tumult so nigh me? what you two? I did not think you had stood in so little awe.
And Ladie I suppose he did deserve it, in offering to compare himself with me; nay, and what's more, he did prefer his Poetry before my valour.
Y'are both rude Fellowes, get you to the door agen, let me see whether you can come in more civilly. Go I say.
Why this is well, now let me hear what you can say for your selves.
What have we here, a Paper of Verses? Read e'm.
And now, 'faith what Poet has hir'd you to put off his verses? you bring nothing of your own besides the Tune, you'd make an incomparable fellow, if you had but a Raw arm, and a Partner, the structure of whose Body were built upon a woodden leg, to bellow it out by turnes in a most pitiful unsanctified Note. Come, I know 'tis some Penny-Rimer or other hath sold you a stock to set up with, to save the delayes of Printing: Take you out of this common way, and I know you have no more Rime in you then a dying Swan, though lesse melody.
Pox of all his Canting; This foolish thing call'd verse is a language as bad as Barbarisme to me: I can as soon turn honest as Rimer.—Divinest Lady; I fear me you'l grow sick of this bad Poet; give me but leave to silence him, I'le talk him dead. Speak nothing but Swords and bullets: Or dart a fire from my Basilisks Eyes shall sindge and stifle all his Poetry: I will do this or any thing, be it beyond the reach of Man or Thought, to do you service.
Has your Sawcinesse done yet? or do you want breath to conjure any further? Sure you forgat your Circle, else we should have seen some darksome Feind rais'd by your Charmes, or heard a ratling Tempest lowder then the tongue that made it: know Sir, a Silence would better become those Swelling lips, till you had known my pleasure. What if I like his Poetry and prefer it 'bove all the Thunders of your puft up valour? 'Tis no new thing to wooe in Rime.
Lady, since 'tis your will, I'le be as silent as the Grave, which strait should Swallow up that Bombast Poet, but that you please to ransom him: My lips shall be seal'd up as close as Cockles, and never divide Themselves till you uncharm e'm.
Now as sure as the Death he talk't of, he speaks all by th' line, his Tongue runs like some mad chain'd dog, thus farre, and is then checkt for want of room and breath. 'Twere better you had obey'd without the tediousnesse of a reply, and not have bin thus stubborn out of Duty. Well proceed Lamprias.
And yet 'twere not amisse to thank in present, if your Rime would bear it. But pray Sir, whence growes this peremptory noise of yours? who hath inform'd you that Pisistratus is not the first in my Thoughts?
'Tis true indeed, I bade him be silent, and see, he dares not so much as whisper; but 'twas only that I might have leisure to deny you. Do you not see how he is obedient? he dares not venture so near a disloyalty as but to breathe at's mouth; he sucks in all the Ayr at his Nostrils onely, and instead of speaking does but meerly shrug, and faintly nod his head, as if he fear'd this were a Disobedience too: faith try him, and see how stubbornly hee'l hold his peace.
You see he dares not trespasse, and I would you durst not too.—But did I command you to breathe nothing but what was clad in verse, and yet forsooth you dare utter your mind in Prose.
A very fine, smooth verse indeed, where the Musick ends in Tongue and Gone: 'twas well chim'd you think: but no matter, I shall find time to punish these Enormities hereafter; mean while I'le tempt your Obedience a little further, and command your Silence, yet 'tis one favour I have done you, that you practise by Pisistratus, and hold your peace by Rule.
My Thanks and I could wish———
Stop there, and know, when I command a Silence, you must not promise but perform it: for once I'le pardon you your Rime, and give you leave to break off ith' middle. Now Pisistratus I untye your tongue, and expect what you have to say.
First let me humbly thank you, that I am still a Souldier, and may talk.
You say right indeed, for most of you are skill'd at no other weapon.
But if you'l give me leave to expresse my Thoughts, I'm none of those weak counterfeit Warriours; no shadow but a Souldier; my Part is not to say, but do: I disclaim these Trifles of Service, this talking way of Courtship: Give me a danger such as would strike astonishment in the bold Alcides: Plant me instead of Ordnance against the Walls of a besieged City, or let me enter on a Grove of Pikes, which I will mow down like a crop in harvest.
Blesse us! what a volley of words is here; you do not Speak methinks, but Discharge, and make every sentence, a peal.
Madam, I bring no puling Elegies, no Poetry I, Bellona is my Muse, and this bright Sword the onely offering I can present: but such as when you please shall sacrifice whole Hecatombes of your Enemies; (if yet among Mortals there be any so prophane as to injure so Divine a Beauty.)
You promise Liberally; but I fear when it should come to th' Test, your Sword will not be so nimble as the Tongue that brags on't; it shall be fastned so close in the Scabbard that you cannot draw it out, or some such pretty toy to delude a danger: Then instead of fighting you shall swear valiantly against the Cutler, and give no Death but in your Curses.
Lady, your comment wrongs my worth, by your fair honour, and by those many Victories, which yet sit warm and fresh upon my cumbred Sword, were he a man, and such whom often Conquests had made great as my self, and to what height my vertues have arriv'd, to be thought immortal; if such a man should speak these words, I would strait confute the wild opinion of the loose world▪ and leave this wonder dead before their Eyes.
Faith 'twould do well to have some proof of so untam'd a valour. But yet Sir, methinks you are much mistaken in the wooing way. Sister, what will you say if I take down this Lyonlike Champion? this Spirit rampant? I'le undertake with two words so to humble him, that of a boysterous Roarer, he shall become as supple a Courtier as you would desire.
I should as much admire the miracle, as the power that effected it.
Mark then. Sir, as I told you, methinks you are mistaken in the way of wooing: I would have a tame Suitor, you make too much noyse in a Ladies Chamber; pray let me have your Courtship in a softer Dialect.
Madam, the power of your love is so prevalent, that it can turn me to any shape; I can submit my mounting soul to a most gentle Carriage and sweet behaviour onely for your sake Lady.
As how Sir? I long for an experiment.
Why thus: Divinest Lady, my humble service being premis'd—
What? Do you repeat your Letters? Sure this was the last you writ to your Country Mistresse. Does it not follow—Hoping you are as deep in love as I am at the writing hereof—and so forth?
Lady I do esteem't the greatest part of my Duty, still at the first appearance to present my service to you.
What and give the same thing twenty times over? I thought you had presented that sufficiently already, but now I begin to suspect it as at anothers command, and none of your own, you are so free on't.
I hope you do not take me for a Serving-man, or Gentleman Usher, Lady?
And yet that lac'd Cloak being so near ally'd to a Livery, may breed a foul suspition.
Fair Madam y'are mistaken.
What Sawcebox? tell me I lye. I'le make you more Obedient.
Would it would please you Lady to descend so low, as [Page 29] make me understand your will, you should alwaies find me as quick in the Execution, as apprehension.
Blesse me! my servant all this while, and now to seek in what pleases me? I'le hear no more at this time, I care not what's your bus'nesse.
Nay Sister, now you are too cruel.
My doome's irrevocable; be gone I say; I expect no reply.
Your Creature.
Come back agen; my humor's alter'd; and now I think on't, I'le put a further tryal upon your Loyalty; you begin to complement pretty well, I'le try the power of love, and see whether it can file you into a more smooth garb; and to that purpose I command you (upon pain of my displeasure) to appear never before me but as your Rival Lamprias is wont, in Rime. I know you are not such an Enemy to the Muses, but that upon such an occasion they may smile upon you. And then for you Lamprias, because I would not have you un-imploy'd, you shall assume his fighting humour; I love a man compleat in all wayes. Give him your Sword Pisistratus, he should have your Buffe Coat, but that your Doublet I fear is Canvas on the back: I know you'l fight couragiously; and for Pisistratus, I make no question, but in a short space we shall have him as good a Poet as most at Court, and make verses on one leg as well as the best of e'm. Come Sister, let's leave e'm to think on't, when you are provided let me see you agen. ( Exe. Pan. Eth. Eud.)
Make verses on one leg? I warrant they'l halt to the purpose. Shall I turn Poet and be feasted by the Players? well! I thank my stars I am not so far to seek yet, but that I can drink, and take Tobacco, with some other initiating qualities, in which we Poets and Souldiers are near ally'd.
In good faith I have not one quality of a Souldier, but running away; I think we were best change habits, I could rime as well in thy Suit, and thou fight as manfully in mine, couldst not?
I but doest think shee's no better sighted, then not to discern us by our faces?
I had forgot that; but what then shall we do?
Nay that I know not, let's ee'n to our friend Miserotos, and take his Advice; A Looker on may see better waies in the game then a Party.
ACT. 3.
SCEN. 1.
SCEN. 2.
Sister, he dares not dream of a neglect.
Still for my faithfulnesse.
What? troubled Brother?
What still Ethusa?
Fair Madam—
SCEN. 3.
Here are love Philtrums now; hey for Philonax.
SCEN. 4.
Be plaint Girle.
Then I assume the honour of your Bride.
ACT. 4.
SCEN. 1.
Then you would have me to love Theocles?
Speak, and thou hast thy wish.
You mean my Sister sure.
Return our thanks, tell him h'hath shewn a Skilful Friendship.
Madam, I'le blesse his Ears with your acceptance.
I must perus't again; such good Newes gathers Strength, and growes ith' Repetition.
I like his Courtship?
How Sister, caught?
Still you increase my joyes.
SCEN. 2.
What? is he grown a Mummer?
One of your Making Lady.
Come, do not thus revenge your self.
What? is Lysander come yet?
Yes, and with him the neglect you taught him.
Prithee good Lady send: faith not worth a servant.
I have one Sir ready at call. Eudora.
Madam.
Go call Lysander hither.
I go Madam. Lysander! Does not your Ladiship mean Theocles?
I tell thee Girle Lysander.
Madam hee's there before you.
O I cry thee mercy, are you the man? well, leave us.
I was once, and there are some here could wish I were so still.
You may inform your self.
My Ignorance will not Admit of a conjecture.
Worthy Madam thanks for these brave employments▪
SCEN. 3.
To them Philonax.
—NOw Noble Philonax.
It wrongs my Faith
I dare, though what I speak be my own poyson.
SCEN. 4.
NAy, but I prithee good Miserotos, hast thou thought on the means whereby we might effect our Desires?
I, that is it we desire to know.
O you can speak plain language now.
Yes, 'faith, the power of love hath reform'd me, yet at first I was very unweildy to be wrought into passable prose. But to the Plot you promis'd.
Then thus: You know your Mistresse hath enjoyn'd you to change humours; you Pisistratus to make Sonnets altogether, [Page 56] and speak nothing but rime: you Lamprias to fight and swagger as he was wont.
Yes, this we know too well, but which way we may execute it, are altogether ignorant.
I'le tell you: you Lamprias shall pen some verses which Pisistratus shall deliver as his own.
I, but what then? he cannot lend me any of his valour, how shall he requite me?
Be patient a while and mark; you shall make him besides some other verses by way of common place, to furnish him with an answer in rime upon most occasions. Now in lieu of this Courtesie, he shall let you in the presence of his Mistresse give him any opprobrious terms whatsoever, and with patience receive 3. or 4. blowes and kicks from you: which must needs give a sufficient Testimony of your mutual change, and her power that effected it.
Thanks kind Miserotos; this plot is admirable: I'le pen some thundering speech for my self, which if I have the grace to pronounce with a brave courage, I am made for ever: But I much fear, I shall hardly find in my heart to beat this Pisistratus, I have found him alwaies so boysterous; and then I have no skill at my weapon.
O 'tis but practising a little, you may beat your man or so.
What if I practis'd first upon one of my Landladies Maids?
That's base and cowardly.
Or one of her little boyes?
Well, do as you will; but see that you look and speak very couragiously.
But what shall I do if he chance to ask me some questions, to which I have no answer in verse?
Why I'le tell you the trick on't; 'Tis but thinking of two words that are rime first; and I'le warrant you with a very little pain, you may screw some other words to make up the verse: 'tis no great matter though one be sometimes shorter then another; a cripple verse that halts upon crutches, sometimes does very well, and moves compassion.
Why look you, let's hear you rime, here's two words, Armado, and Lansprisado.
For your sake Madam, I fear not an Armado, For I would kill e'm all with my Lansprisado.
Very well: here's two other; Musket and Helmet.
O Sir, that's no rime; you must by all means take a great care that your verses fall in the like sound, or else you spoyl all.
What if I read some of our late versifiers for exercise? for I think there are none better to bring a man to a smooth familiar stile of riming, then some of our Modern Poems that treat of Executions, and Monsters born in other Countries.
What Ballads?
So I think they call e'm.
Out upon e'm: treat of executions say you? it is one to read e'm; and for Monsters, they can feign none so prodigious as themselves: I'le be judg'd by your Friend Lamprias else.
Indeed I alwaies esteem'd them scarce fit for a Gentlemans survey; and yet since Watermen, and such people have dabled in Poetry, I see no reason why they may not be gather'd into a Volume, and call'd Works: Howsoever I believe it will not be amisse for a young Sucking Poet as you are to take all advantage of imitation.
I, as if I had a mind to wish her happy, thus would I rime.
Yes, yes, such may serve very well, being 'tis a way you never were skill'd in: But I'le furnish you as well as I can with verses and rimes to give an Answer to most questions, or else stand by and prompt you. You'l keep counsel, and never be discontented if it fall to my lot to enjoy her, as I promise in the same case for you.
Ne're doubt me; but be you sure you do not kick too hard, for I shall be my self again presently if you do. Come let's be gone, and prepare our selves.
I will by no means misse this sport, it will be excellent mirth to hear the Captain thunder out his amorous soft strains, and my t'other friend whine out some bombast speech in a lamentable amorous tone: I'le be sure to follow e'm.
SCEN. 5.
What Friend, alone?
Heavens forbid!
Base villain draw.
SCEN. 6.
O my son Theocles!
What sadnesse do we see? where is the Author?
Here, 'tis base Lysander.
You Artemone take care of Theocles; see the best Surgeons be quickly sent for.
Be not thus tender, 'tis but a scratch h'hath given me.
Some few rash words too bad to be rehearst.
'Tis now past hiding, you must shew the cause To us, or to the rack.
I cannot utter it.
ACT. 5.
SCEN. 1.
Hold Madam, what's your meaning?
SCEN. 2.
Fairest, those knees were never meant to bow But to the Gods that made e'm.
SCEN. 3.
Sir, are you mad?
What mean you Lady?
Sir you have it.
Here are some Gentlemen without desire admittance to Madam Ethusa.
Bid the Trifles begone, I am now too serious.
O by no means, pray Lady let e'm enter.
If they bring mirth they'l do well to season our past fears.
If they perform my Injunction, we shall have very good sport: one of e'm is Pisistratus the quarrelling fighter by my command turn'd Poet, and t'other my riming Gentleman Lamprias thrust into his humour: pray interpose not, but let me have▪ my will.
SCEN. 4.
Most mildly deliver'd, sure you have spoke a speech in a Pageant: but where's your Sonnet? have you brought me no papers of verses?
Let your boy sing e'm.—
Song.
That I may know these are your own making, tell me what is Parnassus. Mis. She'l put him out of his way and spoyl his riming.
Now he is forc'd to rime of himself, mark how he hacks the Kings language.
Well, and what can you say of Helicon?
She was—she was—what, what?
She was his Mistresse not turn'd—not turn'd—
Yes Sir, she was turn'd, but to what?
I see this suddain riming doth somewhat perplex you; but I find by your written verses which you have studied, That upon mature deliberation you write very well, and are like to make a hopeful Poet. Well, so much for you: Now my brave Knight let's hear you rant it.
I think I came off with credit: but she put me shrewdly to it at last, I had no rimes provided for such answers.
Through many craggy cliffes of Mountains high and mighty, have I by the robustuous nerves of these brawny armes sought out Bellonian Encounters, to testifie th'affection I have conceiv'd to the fairest of Fayres, Ethusa; In whose defence I here stand up a Champion, and defie all Bradamants, all Knights of the burning pestle; by the dreadful thunder of my tearing throat I will astonish and confound them; by the Aetnean flashes which my bayting inrag'd blood shall evaporate, I will wrap them in flakes of lightning, or by the Boreasian Tempest of my most strenuous breath shake in pieces their limbs, and sweep their scatter'd reliques into the Sea-like Dust.
Most prodigiously valiant. Sir, your voyce methinks is much chang'd since last I saw you; you then spake in a mild amorous key, but now you do so thunder-thump it, heavens! how it pierc'd my Eares? but yet all this does not confirm me that you are valiant, I should desire some better testimony of your valour then this speech onely.
Shall I then cut this Trayterous Gyants head off, and laying it at my feet (with a Non Curo for my Motto) look like the man that does contemn the world, and playes at Foot-ball [Page 74] with the Globes of Earth. Worm I will trample on Thee.
Hold, or I swear ere thou shalt have the higher hand▪ I'le rime thee to death as they do rats in Ireland.—Not so hard you Rascal.
Most killing verses I promise you. Hold, this is pretty well▪ but I do not believe, but if I gave him Commission, he would return your blowes with some advantage. (I doubt there's some conspiracy betwixt e'm. I'le sift e'm strait) I think I must choose Piststratus, for I like him as well for a Poet, and better then you for a Souldier.
Shee'l choose him now, and then have I play'd the fool all this while to very great purpose. I must prevent it. Lady, and if you please to breath a vigour into my nerves by your command, I'le beat this Coward, till he shall utterly disclaim all title to your favours.
( privately) That's more then I promis'd Sirrah: take heed you vaunt not too much.
Nay that's unequal, you being arm'd, and he having no offensive weapon but his tongue: He shall have another Sword, and then the Conquerour shall not fear a Rival. What say you, will you agree to that?
Madam, I must confesse although I kick him here or so, there have such bonds of Friendship knit us together heretofore, that now they tye my hands from drawing his blood. I would not fight with my Friend.
How say you Sir? are your hands tyed too by the bonds of Friendship? would not you accept the motion?
See you that Sir, hee'l venture if you dare.
Why Pisistratus, Friend Pisistratus, pri thee refuse it; I tell thee I will by no means fight with my Friend.
Nay Sir, you see y'ave cast your self: he hath made me here very good verses, and then he is very valiant: I must choose him for—
Hold Lady, pray you forbear; suspend your choice a [Page 75] while, and I believe I shall prevent it when I have told you all. Know then, he is no Poet, I made those verses, this brain is the mint that coyn'd em.
Which I will trample under my feet you Rascal, can you not keep conditions? Nay seeing you have discover'd. Lady, see here his fortitude, 'tis onely passive, he dares not advance a Sword against a mouse. I in charity, that he might hereafter appear in some credit, lent him my back for a while to use it as he pleas'd, but if you did observe, he struck me very heedfully, he durst not let his armes flee with a free swinge thus, nor went his feet without discretion, as if they kickt in earnest.
Hold Sir, you'l kill the Gentleman; pray Lady end the strife.
Then thus my Friends; neither of you can challenge any reward from me, neither having perform'd my Injunctions: however I will not be so severe as to detain the guerdon I alwaies intended, and you have taken such pains for: you shall be laugh'd at.
Come, come, I told you at first what you might expect, ne're stand to reply for fear of being worse abus'd.
Lady, these Trifles being gone, let us proceed to the Consummation of your joyes. I am glad yet you us'd Theocles better.
Nay Sir, I can easily distinguish betwixt realities and outsides.
Madam I thank your good opinion, and will study to continue it. Come forward to the Temple.
That is our general voyce, pray Sir, lead on.
Why this is well, I thought 'twould come about at last.