Popery plain Foppery: OR, THE EXCELLENCY OF THE Protestant Religion, In Opposition to POPERY.

A POEM, Written by Sir W. V. Baronet.

Licensed, and Entred according to Act of Parliament.

LONDON, Printed by John Harefinch, in Mountague-Court in Little Britain. 1689.

[...]

THE EXCELLENCY OF THE Protestant Religion.

I Blunder forth no Quirks, nor captious Theams,
No trivial Toyes, nor fond lascivious Dreams;
Nor buzz the honest Reader in the Ear
With Miracles were done I know not where;
But much do blame our Carnal-witted Brood,
Who loath to taste of Intellectual Food,
Yet Surfeit on old Tales of Robin Hood;
The Wonders of the Well of Winnifride,
Which holy Friars have so often try'd;
Of Patrick's Broils, or of St. George's Lance;
Of Errant Knights, or of the Fairy Dance;
Or Arthur's Knights, or the twelve Peers of France;
How Dunstan catch't the Devil by the Nose,
With thousands of absurder Lyes than those:
How Patrick kill'd, five hundred years before,
Thousands of Irish Kernes by charmed lore;
How David did a mighty Mountain move,
And by his Word the massy Earth remove:
With many more, to gull the multitude,
Which the True Church accounts both false and rude:
But whilst such idle Tales about are hurl'd,
I'll sing the best Religion in the World:
That which is pure, of God's bright Spirit born,
And grieves to see Christ's Seamless Garment torn,
Or parted from the Fashion Primitive,
But, as the Gospel teaches, strives to live:
And flies vain Dreams, which oft inchant the Sense
From worshipping the God-head's Excellence.
She slights the Tales of Poets strange Vagaries,
Vows made to Saints, and needless Ave Maries:
And whilst some steal to paths unknown, or stray
To stranger Coasts, She goes the surest way,
For fear of Wolves, or what may else betide
A man that loseth Christ, his surest Guide.
While some in Tongue unknown like Parrots chat,
And ask of God by rote they know not what;
Our Churches Babes do pray in Christ his Name
For what they want, and He doth grant the same
For his dear sake, who pleads for Humane Race,
While they with understanding crave his grace;
And having gain'd their Suit, they sing his praise
With cheerful hearts, new Tongues and thankful Layes;
Not grounding Faith on Saints Pluralities,
On Angels, Powers, or Principalities;
Acknowledging no Advocate but one,
But build their Faith upon the Corner-stone,
Exploding School-mens dreams, hypocrisies,
Souls Merchandize, and winding Fallacies;
But preaching of Christ's Gospel, strive to free
Poor Captive Souls from Sin and Slavery.
But as of old the Poets did approve
The lesser Gods as Advocate to Jove,
And by the like distinctions in the Schools
Would them create subordinated Fools,
Or Courtiers of th' Olympian Majesty,
To intercede or aid Mortality,
To which they kneel'd in various Idol shapes,
Like Babel's Head of Gold, Calves, Cats, or Apes;
So Babels babling Daws Saints help exact:
St. Margaret Lucina's part must act;
St. Anthony relieves them of the Pox,
With Reliques, charms fetch'd from old Balaam's box.
For the Twin-brother gods they consecrate
St. Nicholas at Sea their Advocate:
St. Eustace must uphold the Forrest game,
For which old Pagans us'd Dianas Name;
With a huge Club St. Christopher they please,
As those old Heathens painted Hercules:
Yea, every place possessed Tutelars,
Small Gods to ease them of their heavy cares;
Juno helpt Carthage, Mars Rome, Pallas Greece,
Ceres blest Corn, Pan Sheep, Pomona Trees:
So Dennis France, George England, Jago Spain,
And the like Saints to guard all Coasts they feign.
The Scots were all of good St. Andrews ward,
Ireland of Patrick's, Wales of David's guard;
Unto St. Mark the bold Venetian bends,
And he that Venice wrongs with Mark contends;
But above all, St. Peter bears the Bell,
He Rome protects, and Rome must all excell:
Numa's Egeria Peter hath supprest,
With Romulus Saint Peter did contest;
Nay, Peter's Keys the Eagle bruis'd, therefore
St. Peter's Chair at Rome all must adore.
Concerning other Points of Faith's abuse,
As Purgatory's pain, false Idols use;
Courting the Saints, to Christ's apparent wrong;
Gods sacred Word kept from the Vulgar Tongue;
Additions to the Mass, the Papal Keys,
And Priests debarr'd of Wives; Let him that weighs
The Dreams of Balaams Priests, this Passage know,
Pride made the Pope a Simon Magus grow,
Boldly to sell the Spirit's Gifts for gain,
In sundry wise, as History makes Plain.
Indulgences, and Masses many a score
For Money bought and sold, what would you more?
But who no Money hath cannot obtain
One Mass to save from Purgatories pain.
Yet a true Church Rome fain would still be thought,
Though little else but Fraud is in her wrought:
But let us leave her and her glosing words,
And call to mind what Scripture well records,
That she shall see how many Potentates
Will flinch from her, and free themselves and States;
And likewise hear One with a dreadful Tone
Proclaim the fall of Whorish Babylon.
FINIS.

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