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<title> English, my English </title>
"Learning a new language is definitely easier before you have reached the age of sixteen" my first English teacher told me this once and I believe she was right. This is why I also explain the facts of past in this essay. 
When I'm listening to his voice, I really try to understand but it is too soft. Somehow the words slips from my mind. Soothing words from the TV. I cant yet understand or translate them since I'm to young, without the experience. My feet and hands are tiny and I'm sitting in the sofa with my sister. She is older then me and I look up to her asking about words that I haven't learned yet. Not to disturb our parents she softly whispers to me in Swedish and I slowly understand this new way of communicating. I listen and it is truly a remarkable gift to be able to hear, of course at this age I am not aware of it. Why aren't we wise before our old age, t makes it so much harder to appreciate. Of my five senses it was listening that first made me learn. In this I am not weak words that means nothing by themselves or in texts are easily understood when they are spoken, pronounced by someone else.
As I grew up I started to write my own stories and essays enjoying the ability to write about events and feelings I could not express or talk about. The problem now is that I don't know enough words and phrases to fully express myself. I get by, but I want to write intelligent texts. I want them to be as fluently as when I write in Swedish. 
After twelve unproductive years in school I got an urge to study. You easily get away from studying in high school, for ex I never studied any grammar not even in Swedish after the eight grade. I just heard what was correct and I always got good grades, mostly MVGs on my English tests. Now I'm paying for earlier laziness by failing our first exam at the University. A lesson hard to take for the ego. 
Swedish is an easy language compared to English when it comes down to grammar or spelling. Maybe that's just because I was born here, the immigrants certainly don't agree. English also consists of a lot of words from languishes not very closely related to Germanic and that doesn't make it easier. The best part of the Universities English course is the reading. The books I read so far has been interesting and easy to understand. When you open up a book it gives you a new world. I can sit for hours forgetting my own problems for someone who doesn't even exist. I have had a hard time learning to read. It took me much longer than for the other kids. The teacher was wondering what was wrong with me and talked to my parents. There was not much they could do except forcing me to try again and again. It did not work. My mother thought that I had dyslexia like herself. Then one day sometime before Christmas my mother bought a book with stories about the signs of the Zodiac. It was beautiful With pictures of heroes and goddesses. I wanted to understand the exiting stories so bad that I finally did. Since then literature has held me captured. 
This summer I travelled all over Sweden and a part of Norway by car with a friend of mine. Sometimes when I got a little homesick and insecure she read to me so that I should fall asleep, most of the time it had the opposite effect though. She is very good at reading out loud and never seems to get nervous. When I read or talk out loud it flows as long as I don't think about what I am saying or start to wonder about how the most correct pronunciation would sound like. This stage usually lasts for sixty seconds, after that I start to loose it, if I am not comfortable in the situation. It is getting better though. After a couple of lectures with a new class it doesn't scare me anymore and talking English becomes no harder then reading any other text in Swedish. 
What is the conclusion of this? It is a description of learning outside the perfect peoples world, in the lower part of the scale were a lot of us exists. The learning of someone ordinary that with a lot of time becomes better, achieves more and more in the knowledge of one subject using three of her senses to read, write, talk and listen.
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