<< *175 MICHAEL O'NEILL & JEREMY SEABROOK : THE BOSOM OF THE FAMILY . P & P , 1971 . FIRST PERF. : 310171 . CHAR : 01 EV ELYN PARGETER , 02 JAMES PARGETER , 03 LYNN PARGETER , 04 NI CHOLAS PARGETER , 05 LAURENCE CALDECOTT , 06 MIKE , 07 MRS O OSIT . >> $ < THE ACTION OF THE PLAY TAKES PLACE IN AN OUTER SUBURB OF S OUTH LONDON . > $ #71 $ < ACT ONE > $ < SCENE ONE > $ < A NINETEEN TWENTIES VILLA IN A SOUTH LONDON SUBURB , WITH BAY WINDOW , GABLE , PORTHOLE WINDOW WITH SURROUNDING ORNAME NTAL STONE WREATH , GALLEON IN STAINED GLASS DOOR ; SASH WIN DOWS , FRONT GARDEN CONCRETE AND HYDRANGEAS . $ INTERIOR TWO ROOMS CONVERTED INTO ONE , CREAM FLUSH DOORS WI TH DIAGONAL CHROME HANDLES . $ WALLPAPER RAISED FLEUR-DE-LYS PATTERN . $ METAL CHANDELIER WITH SIMULATED CANDLES IN WHITE PLASTIC , S URMOUNTED BY OPAQUE GLASS FLAMES . $ WINDOW SEAT IN BAY ; FLOOR TO CEILING GOLD VELVET CURTAINS W ITH MATCHING PELMET AND TASSELLED CORD . $ MUCH EVIDENCE OF COMPETENT THOUGH AMATEUR STRUCTURAL MODIFIC ATION . $ IRON LADDEREX UNIT , BEARING TELEVISION , BOOKS - HISTORICAL ROMANCES FROM THE LIBRARY , THE REGULAR PATTERNED COVERS OF A BOOK-OF-THE-MONTH CLUB . $ TREASURES OF BRITAIN , HOLY BIBLE , AA BOOKS , AND A LEATHER -BOUND HOME ENGINEER . $ ALL OVER THE ROOM AN ASSORTMENT OF SENTIMENTAL GEWGAWS-PIECE S OF MANUFACTURED FOLK-ART , DOLLS IN NATIONAL COSTUME IN A BOW-FRONTED CHINA CABINET , PHOTOGRAPHS OF NICHOLAS CHARTING HIS EVERY STAGE OF DEVELOPMENT THROUGH CHILDHOOD AND ADOLES CENCE . $ WOVEN FIRE-SCREEN STANDS BEFORE THE UNUSED GRATE . $ MONOCHROME CARPETS WITH RIC-RAC PATTERN , BRINDLED SIMULATED PELT HEARTH RUGS . $ AMPLE AND OPULENT BROCADED THREE-PIECE , A MODERN ROUND DINI NG TABLE , A BLANKET CHEST AND FITTED CUPBOARDS . $ REGENCY WINE-TABLE WITH TELEPHONE ; A CANTERBURY FULL OF LIG HT MAGAZINES , INCLUDING HORSE AND HOUND , THE LADY , WOMAN' S REALM , EXCHANGE AND MART , HAIRDRESSERS' AND PERRUQUIER'S JOURNAL . $ PICTURES - A CANALETTO REPRODUCTION IN ORNATE FRAME AND A MO DERN-FRAMED ANGRY SEASCAPE OF STORM-TOSSED BILLOWS . $ SUPERFLUOUS ORNAMENTATION INCLUDES VICTORIAN MARBLE CLOCK , RUBBER PLANTS , SPIDERWORT , A FLESHY AMARYLLIS , A CONVEX M IRROR WITH IRRADIATING TUBULAR GOLD STRIPS . $ THE PARGETERS AT TABLE . $ MR AND MRS PARGETER , LYNN AND NICHOLAS . > $ 01 DID YOU ENJOY THAT , NICK ? $ YOU WON'T GET PIMPLES IF YOU EAT A NICE LOT OF GREENSTUFF . $ THOSE PEPPERS ARE FULL OF VITAMINS . $ I MADE A DRESSING , LYNN , AND STILL YOU HAVE TO GO AND SMOT HER IT IN SALAD CREAM ... $ WHAT ABOUT YOU , JIM , YOU COULD FIND ROOM FOR SOME MORE , I DO KNOW . $ < ( SHE LADES QUANTITIES OF SALAD ON TO HIS PLATE . ) > $ 02 I DON'T LIKE PEPPERS IN SALAD . $ THEY GIVE ME DYSPEPSIA . $ I RECKON I 'VE GOT AN ULCER COMING . $ 01 ULCERS RUBBISH . $ ONLY PEOPLE WHO WORRY GET ULCERS . $ 02 I SHOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF IT 'S PERFORATED ... I DRIVE MYSELF TOO HARD , THAT 'S MY TROUBLE . $ I THINK I 'VE GOT A SALE UP AT WINDERMERE COURT TONIGHT . $ 01 < ( MOUE ) > $ O NO . $ BETTY 'S RINGING US AT HALF-PAST EIGHT . $ YOU 'RE NEVER IN WHEN SHE RINGS , AND YOU KNOW IT 'S THE HIG HLIGHT OF HER WEEK . $ I ALWAYS HAVE TO TELL HER THE SAME STORY . $ IT LOOKS FISHY , SHE 'LL THINK THERE 'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH OUR MARRIAGE IF YOU 'RE OUT EVERY NIGHT . $ 02 WELL IF I TALK TO HER , SHE 'LL ONLY START WHINING ABOUT GOING DOWN THERE . $ IT 'S TOO MUCH EFFORT . $ 01 WELL YOU KNOW HOW DEMANDING BEDRIDDEN PEOPLE ARE . $ 02 WORK COMES FIRST , DEAR . $ A FEW MORE SALES LIKE THIS AND I SHALL BE READY TO START UP ON MY OWN . $ 02 YOU HAVEN'T GOT IT IN YOU , YOU 'LL ALWAYS BE SOMEBODY 'S UNDERLING AND THAT 'S FLAT . $ 02 I 'VE ALWAYS GIVEN OF MY BEST , EV , THERE 'S NOBODY BREA THING CAN DO MORE THAN THAT . $ 01 OH , I APPRECIATE THAT . $ I KNOW IN YOUR POSITION YOU 'VE GOT TO DO ALL THIS EXTRA , T HE COST OF LIVING BEING WHAT IT IS , BUT WE MUST NEVER LET I T INTERFERE WITH OUR FAMILY LIFE . $ 02 WELL , NICK 'LL WANT TO GO ABROAD AGAIN THIS YEAR , AND W E CAN'T HAVE HIM WITHOUT A PENNY IN HIS POCKET . $ 04 I DON'T WANT TO GO ABROAD WITH THAT LOT . $ 01 GOING ON THE CONTINENT WHEN YOU 'RE YOUNG IS AN EDUCATION IN ITSELF . $ 04 ALL WE DID LAST YEAR WAS LOOK AT PICTURES AND GO ROUND CH URCHES . $ 01 < ( SEVERELY ) > $ SOME OF MAN'S FINEST ACHIEVEMENTS HAVE BEEN DONE IN ITALY , NICHOLAS . $ SEEING THEM MAKES HISTORY COME ALIVE . $ 03 YOU 'RE DAMN LUCKY AT THAT SCHOOL . $ ALL WE EVER GOT AT ST ASAPH'S WAS A TRIP TO THE HOUSES OF PA RLIAMENT WITH THE CIVICS MISTRESS . $ #72 $ 04 YOU GO ON YOUR ANNUAL MAN-HUNT IN THE SUN NOW , THOUGH , DON'T YOU ? $ 03 I WORK HARD FIFTY WEEKS OF THE YEAR FOR THAT . $ ME AND JACKIE ARE ENTITLED TO A BIT OF RELAXATION AFTER WORK ING OURSELVES TO A SHADOW - $ 01 NICK , WE DON'T WANT THAT KIND OF CHEAP TALK TO YOUR SIST ER . $ < ( TO LYNN ) > $ ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK IT 'S A VERY SUITABLE KIND OF HOLIDAY FOR AN ENGAGED GIRL . $ I DON'T KNOW WHAT MIKE 'S THINKING ABOUT LETTING YOU GO . $ 03 I 'D GIVE ANYTHING TO GET OUT OF IT , BUT IT 'S A BIG EVE NT IN JACKIE'S LIFE , AND SHE WAS SCARED TO GO ON HER OWN . $ SHE 'S NEVER BEEN ABROAD BEFORE , POOR KID . $ MIKE SAID IT 'D DO ME GOOD TO FORGET ABOUT THE WEDDING FOR A LITTLE WHILE . $ 04 IT 'D DO US GOOD TO BE ABLE TO FORGET ABOUT IT AS WELL . $ 01 < ( DIDACTIC ) > $ NICHOLAS , A GIRL'S WEDDING IS SOMETHING VERY PRECIOUS TO HE R . $ IT 'S THE FINEST THING A YOUNG GIRL CAN HOPE FOR IN THIS LIF E , AND I WON'T HAVE IT SPOILT FOR LYNN BY YOU OR ANYBODY . $ 03 YOU CAN STAY AWAY FOR A START . $ 04 SO COULD THE GROOM FOR THE PART HE PLAYS IN ALL YOUR CALC ULATIONS . $ 01 NICK 'LL BE THERE , LYNN , AS WE ALL SHALL , TO GIVE YOU A PROPER SEND-OFF . $ 01 WELL HE 'S NOT COMING TO THE CHURCH IN JEANS , COMMITTING SACRILEGE . $ < ( NICK RISES . ) > $ 01 HAVE YOU DONE YOUR HOMEWORK , NICK ? $ I THOUGHT THURSDAY WAS FRENCH NIGHT . $ 04 I DID IT AT SCHOOL . $ I 'M GOING OUT . $ 01 < ( SHRIEKS ) > $ YOU CAN'T AFFORD TO GO OUT WITH YOUR A LEVELS ONLY SIX WEEKS AWAY . $ IN YOUR LAST REPORT YOUR FORM-MASTER SAID YOU WERE BRIGHT BU T NOT BRILLIANT . $ AND ALTHOUGH I DON'T THINK HE SHOULD HAVE SAID IT , THERE 'S A LOT OF TRUTH IN IT . $ I MEAN , WE 'RE NOT HAND IN GLOVE WITH MR CARTWRIGHT , LIKE THAT ROY'S PARENTS ARE . $ YOU DON'T GET THE EXTRA TUITION HE DOES . $ HE WENT TO ROY'S HOUSE FOR BOXING DAY , AND I HAPPEN TO KNOW HE WAS THERE AGAIN ON EASTER MONDAY . $ YOU DON'T STAND A CHANCE EXCEPT BY YOUR OWN EFFORTS . $ 04 O , I 'LL GET THROUGH . $ THERE 'S LOADS OF TIME . $ 01 I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU HAVE TO GO OUT . $ WHY CAN'T YOU HAVE YOUR FRIENDS HERE ? $ YOU 'VE GOT A ROOM , NICK , THAT 'D BE THE ENVY OF ANY BOY I N THAT SCHOOL . $ AND YOU CAN MAKE ANY AMOUNT OF NOISE WITHOUT DISTURBING US . $ 02 THE WORK I PUT INTO THAT ROOM , SON ... $ HUNDRED QUIDSWORTH OF BEST PINE , UNITS FOR ALL YOUR RECORDS , STRIP LIGHTING ... $ 01 HE NEVER USES THEM . $ JUST LIKE THAT BUREAU I BOUGHT YOU WITH THE SILVER INKSTAND . $ ALL THE AUCTIONS I WENT TO , AND THEN YOU GO AND USE IT AS A WARDROBE . $ I FOUND ONE OF YOUR SHIRTS THERE THIS MORNING . $ 04 IT 'S TAPERED SEERSUCKER , I BOUGHT THAT MESELF . $ 01 I THOUGHT IT WAS ONE OF LYNN'S BLOUSES AT FIRST . $ WHY DO YOU HAVE TO GO AND BUY THINGS BEHIND MY BACK ? $ YOU ALWAYS LOOK YOUR BEST IN THE THINGS I BUY YOU , MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT THAT ... $ THERE 'S NO BOY IN THAT SCHOOL HAS MORE OR BETTER CLOTHES TH AN YOU DO . $ 02 THERE 'S NO NEED TO BUY CLOTHES WITH YOUR POCKET MONEY , NICK . $ THAT 'S FOR YOUR OWN PERSONAL SPENDING ... $ WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE I ONLY HAD NEW CLOTHES ONCE A YEAR . $ OUR MUM USED TO TAKE ME DOWN THE SHOPS EVERY EASTER AND BUY ME AN OUTFIT ; A COUPLE OF PAIRS OF THICK GREY SOCKS , UNDER PANTS , VESTS , A PAIR OF GREY FLANNELS AND A BLAZER . $ AND I USED TO STAND IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR LOST IN 'EM . $ BUT IF I SO MUCH AS MENTIONED THAT A SLEEVE WAS A BIT TOO LO NG SHE 'D SAY ' YOU CAN SIT AND TWIDDLE YOUR THUMBS TILL YOU GROW INTO THEM ' . $ 04 HERE WE GO . $ SCENES FROM PROLETARIAN LIFE . $ I EXPECT IT 'LL BE THE DARK DAYS OF THE WAR NEXT . $ 01 I WON'T HAVE YOU MAKING YOUR FATHER LOOK SMALL , NICK . $ HE ANSWERED HIS COUNTRY'S CALL WHEN HE WASN'T MUCH OLDER THA N YOU ARE NOW . $ 03 < ( QUOTING MECHANICALLY ) > $ FOR THREE LONG YEARS WE WERE AT THE MERCY OF THE ELEMENTS , THE TWIN SCOURGE OF SUN AND SAND - $ 04 WHOSE WAR MEMOIRS YOU BEEN RAKING THROUGH FOR THAT ? $ 02 LET ME TELL YOU , MY BOY , YOU NEVER KNEW WHETHER THE NEX T BULLET HAD GOT YOUR NUMBER ON IT . $ 04 THAT 'S NOT WHAT YOU TOLD ME WHEN YOU WERE FULL OF WHISKY . $ YOU SAID THE ONLY INJURY YOU SUFFERED WAS YOUR TEETH FALLING OUT WHEN YOU ATE THAT TIN OF BAD CARROTS IN CAIRO . $ 01 IT 'S ALL THIS MODERN LITERATURE THAT 'S PUTTING THESE ID EAS INTO YOUR HEAD , NICK . $ I 'M SURE OF IT . $ YOU 'RE NOT CONSIDERED CLEVER NOWADAYS UNLESS YOU CAN SCOFF AT EVERYTHING ... $ YOU DON'T SEEM TO READ DICKENS AND THOSE WONDERFUL OLD CLASS ICS THAT ARE OUR HERITAGE . $ 04 WELL , DICKENS USED TO SATIRISE THINGS , INSTITUTIONS AND THAT . $ 01 THERE WAS SOME POINT IN IT IN THOSE TIMES . $ THERE WERE ... ABUSES AND SO FORTH . $ BUT THERE 'S TOO MUCH TEARING THINGS TO PIECES AMONG YOUR GE NERATION . $ WHAT YOU 'VE GOT TO LEARN TO DO IS BUILD , NICHOLAS , AND BE CONSTRUCTIVE , LIKE LYNN IS . $ 04 WHAT DOES SHE DO THAT 'S ANY USE ! $ 03 < ( AGGRIEVED ) > $ WHAT DO I DO ? $ WHAT I DO IS AN ART AND A SERVICE , AND IT TAKES A LOT MORE GUMPTION THAN YOU 'VE GOT , SITTING THERE TELLING US WHAT 'S RIGHT AND WRONG OUT OF SCHOOL-BOOKS . $ PEOPLE COME TO ME BECAUSE THEY WANT TO BE MADE BEAUTIFUL ... $ YESTERDAY WE HAD SIX PATIENTS FROM HILLTOP . $ THEY CAME IN A MINIBUS , AND JACKIE WAS IN A PANIC ABOUT HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM , SHE SAID SHE COULDN'T BEAR TO TOUCH THEM , BEING NERVE CASES . $ I SAID ' WE 'RE GIVING THEM BACK THEIR SELF-RESPECT , JACKIE , WE 'RE HELPING THEM ALONG THE PATH TO RECOVERY ' . $ AND THEY WERE EVER SO GRATEFUL . $ WHEN THEY WENT OUT THEY WERE DIFFERENT PEOPLE . $ I COULD SEE THEM , AND SO COULD JACKIE IN THE END ... $ AND YOU SHOULD SEE THE PENSIONERS ON THURSDAY AFTERNOONS . $ I SEE THEM LOOKING AT THEMSELVES IN THE WALL MIRRORS AS THEY GO OUT , SMILING AND PATTING CURLS . $ WE WORK WONDERS ON THEM . $ 04 MIRACLE WORKER , THEY BRING OUT THE DEAD AND THE DYING JU ST TO BE TOUCHED BY YOU . $ 01 BIT OF CHEESE ANYONE ? $ I GOT SOME NICE CAERPHILLY , NICE AND MILD ... $ < ( JIM ENGROSSED IN NEWSPAPER . ) > $ 02 HERE , EV , THERE 'S A MRS QUILTER IN A CASE HERE . $ IS THAT THE ONE WHO WAS THE ORGANISER OF THE RATEPAYERS' ASS OCIATION ? $ 01 I TOLD YOU ABOUT HER , THAT TERRIBLE COFFEE MORNING I WEN T TO . $ I BUTTONHOLED HER AND SAID HOW INTERESTED WE WERE IN THE WOR K THEY WERE DOING . $ I SAID ' THE RATES ARE PUNITIVE THESE DAYS , AREN'T THEY ? ' $ SHE LOOKED ME UP AND DOWN AND SAID ' I SHOULDN'T HAVE THOUGH T YOU 'D HAVE ANY PROBLEMS IN YOUR AREA , YOU 'VE NO REAL GR IEVANCE IN THE SENSE WE HAVE ... I SAID TO HER , ' MRS QUILT ER ' I SAID , ' IT 'S DONE ON FOOTAGE , AND OURS IS FORTY-SE VEN FROM END TO END . $ WE 'RE DOUBLE-FRONTED , YOU KNOW . ' $ SHE LOOKED AT ME GONE OUT ... $ SHE WAS ALWAYS A GREAT ONE FOR THRUSTING HERSELF FORWARD . $ 02 SHE WON'T WANT TO BE IN THE LIMELIGHT MUCH AFTER THIS . $ 01 OH ? $ 02 < ( READS ) > $ DOCTOR'S WIFE DENIES CHARGE . $ MRS ROWENA QUILTER , DESCRIBED AS A HOUSEWIFE , 14 BELCROFT GARDENS , PLEADED NOT GUILTY AT LEWISHAM MAGISTRATES' COURT TO STEALING GOODS VALUED AT EIGHTY-FOUR NEW PENCE , THE PROP ERTY OF TESCO SUPERMARKETS LTD , 26TH FEBRUARY 1971 . $ MRS HARRIET FINCH , STORE DETECTIVE , SAID SHE OBSERVED QUIL TER PLACING NUMEROUS OBJECTS IN HER SHOPPING BAG . $ WHEN CHALLENGED , SHE SAID ' OH DEAR , HOW SILLY OF ME . ' $ HER BAG WAS FOUND TO CONTAIN A LARGE TIN OF SALMON , TWO PAC KETS OF FIRE-LIGHTERS AND A CAN OF HAIRSPRAY . $ 01 < ( TRIUMPH ) > $ THERE . $ IT JUST SHOWS , DOESN'T IT ? $ 02 NO , LISTEN , EV . $ ' IN HER PURSE SHE HAD EIGHT POUNDS . $ SHE TOLD THE COURT SHE HAD BEEN SLEEPING VERY BADLY OF LATE , AND HER HUSBAND HAD PRESCRIBED SOME BARBITURATES . ' $ < ( LYNN INTERJECTS - ) > $ 03 THEY 'VE ALWAYS GOT SOME EXCUSE , I SUPPOSE SHE GOT OFF . $ 02 THE MAGISTRATE SAID , ' THE BENCH IS APPALLED TO FIND A W OMAN OF YOUR POSITION IN THIS SITUATION , AND CAN ONLY CONCL UDE THAT THE DRUGS PRESCRIBED HAD RESULTED IN A STATE OF TEM PORARY CONFUSION . ' $ SHE WAS GIVEN A CONDITIONAL DISCHARGE . $ < ( HE LAYS DOWN PAPER . ) > $ 01 I THINK IT 'S A SCANDAL . $ ALL THAT MONEY IN HER PURSE , IT 'S JUST DOWNRIGHT WICKEDNES S . $ HOW 'S BUSINESS TO SURVIVE IF EVEN PEOPLE LIKE THAT CAN'T BE RELIED UPON NOT TO STEAL EVERYTHING THEY CAN LAY THEIR HAND S ON ? $ I COULD WALK INTO TESCO'S TOMORROW MORNING AND PRACTICALLY R ANSACK THE PLACE AND THEN SAY I WAS CONFUSED . $ 02 BUT WE WOULDN'T . $ AND I 'LL TELL YOU WHY WE WOULDN'T , BECAUSE WE 'RE NOT THIE VES . $ < ( GROWING VEHEMENCE ; HIS INTENSITY HERE COMPENSATES FOR T HE WEAKNESS OF HIS ROLE WITHIN THE FAMILY . ) > $ WHETHER IT 'S SHOPLIFTING OR MURDER , ILLNESS IS THE EXCUSE THEY FALL BACK ON . $ AND THEY GET AWAY WITH IT . $ DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME PEOPLE WHO ARE THAT WELL OFF DON'T KN OW RIGHT FROM WRONG ? $ IF THEY WERE STARVING YOU COULD UNDERSTAND IT . $ PEOPLE WHO DO WRONG HAVE GOT NO CHARACTER , AND NOBODY 'S GO ING TO TELL ME ANY DIFFERENT . $ #73 $ WHAT ABOUT YOUR CISSIE'S DAUGHTER THAT THEY SAID WENT MENTAL ? $ THERE WASN'T ANYTHING THE MATTER WITH HER . $ WHAT DID THEY TRY AND TELL CIS ? $ THEY SAID SHE WAS LIKE THAT BECAUSE OF HER RELATIONSHIP WITH HER FATHER . $ HE 'D BEEN DEAD TWENTY YEARS . $ THE ONLY TROUBLE WITH HER , SHE WAS LAZY AND DIDN'T WANT TO WORK . $ HALF THE TROUBLE WITH THESE PEOPLE IS THEY HAVEN'T GOT ENOUG H TO DO . $ WE 'RE TOO ACTIVE TO WANT TO SIT AROUND AND FEEL SORRY FOR O URSELVES . $ I 'D TAKE 'EM OUT OF THESE REST HOMES THEY CALL PRISONS AND PUT 'EM TO WORK DOING SOMETHING USEFUL , BUILDING MOTORWAYS - SAVE THE TAXPAYER MILLIONS . $ 01 < ( FOLLOWING HER OWN TRAIN OF THOUGHT ) > $ I SHALL ALWAYS SAY CIS'S BIG MISTAKE WAS BRINGING HER UP THE WAY SHE DID . $ THAT CHILD LIVED IN THAT TABERNACLE PLACE . $ I 'M THE FIRST TO ADMIT THAT RELIGION 'S IMPORTANT - IT PULL S YOUR THROUGH IN TIMES OF TROUBLE - BUT IT WASN'T HEALTHY F OR A LITTLE GIRL OF THAT AGE TO BE TROTTING OUT ALL THOSE BI BLE PROPHECIES WHENEVER SHE MET YOU . $ WHEN THEY USED TO COME ROUND HERE , BEFORE THEY BECAME SO JE ALOUS AND VINDICTIVE , I USED TO THINK ' WHAT SORT OF A CHIL DHOOD IS IT ? $ SHE 'S OLD BEFORE HER TIME . ' $ SHE 'D STAND THERE SO SERIOUS , TELLING ME WHEN THE WORLD WA S GOING TO END . $ I 'D SAY TO HER , ' I SHOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT THAT IF I WAS YO U , LET THAT TAKE CARE OF ITSELF . $ YOUR AUNTIE ISN'T WORRIED . ' $ BUT SHE USED TO STAMP HER LITTLE FOOT AND SAY , ' IT 'S IN T HE BIBLE , AUNTIE , IT 'S IN THE BIBLE . ' $ WELL , YOU COULDN'T EXPECT HER TO GROW UP INTO A NORMAL WOMA N , COULD YOU ? $ 04 WAS SHE A LES THEN ? $ < ( AWFUL SILENCE . ) > $ 02 WHAT DID YOU SAY ? $ 04 YOU KNOW , IS SHE A LESBIAN ? $ 01 I DON'T THINK WE 'LL HAVE THAT KIND OF TALK AT THE TEA-TA BLE , NICHOLAS . $ 03 WELL . $ MUM , WE ALL KNOW THESE THINGS GO ON , THEY COME IN SHOP AND SOME OF THEM ARE QUITE OPEN ABOUT IT . $ THEY ASK FOR SHORT HAIRCUTS . $ 02 I SHOULDN'T HAVE THOUGHT YOU 'D LET THEM INSIDE THE DOOR . $ 03 IT 'S CUSTOM DAD , IT 'S MONEY . $ 02 WELL , THERE NEVER USED TO BE SO MANY OF THEM MARCHING RO UND IN GREAT GANGS LIKE THEY DO NOW . $ 01 < ( INDIGNANTLY ) > $ I 'VE HEARD IT SAID THAT 'S AN ILLNESS TOO ... $ 04 WHO CARES ANYWAY ? $ EVERYBODY GOES THROUGH THAT SORT OF PHASE , DON'T THEY ? $ 01 WHAT DO YOU MEAN A PHASE ? $ 04 FREUD SAYS THE WHOLE THING STARTS IN INFANCY . $ 02 HOW DID HE KNOW WHAT PEOPLE GO THROUGH ? $ I NEVER WENT THROUGH IT AND I DON'T KNOW ANYBODY WHO DID ... $ THERE 'S TOO MUCH EMPHASIS ON SEX . $ IT 'S ALL A PRODUCT OF YOUR OVERHEATED IMAGINATIONS , YOU AN D ALL THAT CLICK YOU HANG AROUND WITH . $ 01 I COULDN'T AGREE MORE . $ WHEN THE TIMES COME , NICK , AFTER YOU 'VE BEEN THROUGH CAMB RIDGE , YOU 'LL MEET A REALLY NICE GIRL . $ AND YOU 'LL SEE WE WERE RIGHT . $ IT 'S NATURAL , THERE 'S NO NEED FOR ANYONE TO MAKE A GREAT COFUFFLE ABOUT IT . $ IT 'S THE SAME FOR EVERYBODY . $ 02 < ( GETS UP , PREPARES TO LEAVE ) > $ I SHALL NEED THE CAR TONIGHT , LYNN . $ YOU WON'T BE WANTING IT , WILL YOU ? $ 03 OO , DAD , I WAS TAKING MIKE DOWN TO GREENWICH FOR JAZZ A FLOAT . $ IT GOES RIGHT UP TO RICHMOND , DOESN'T GET BACK TILL TWO . $ WE CAN'T USE MIKE'S CAR , 'COS IT 'S BEING RESPRAYED WHERE S OME MANIAC SCRAPED THE PAINT OFF THE WING . $ 02 WELL I 'VE GOT TO TAKE SOME STUFF IN THE CAR ... I 'M AGI TATING FOR A VAN , LOADING UP THE CAR WITH VITREOUS INSTALLA TIONS DOESN'T DO THE SPRINGS ANY GOOD ... $ HERE , LYNN , YOU 'LL HAVE TO TAKE A TAXI . $ HERE 'S A COUPLE OF QUID FOR THE FARE . $ I SHALL BE LATE , EV DEAR . $ 01 IT 'S ALL RIGHT , I SHALL BE UP . $ I 'M READING CORA PEARL'S MEMOIRS . $ I CAN UNDERSTAND HER APPEAL , ALTHOUGH SHE WAS SUCH A BAD WO MAN . $ I CAN'T PUT IT DOWN ... $ < ( JIM GOES . $ EVELYN CLEARS THE TABLE , CLATTER OF PLATES . ) > $ NICK , YOU MAY WATCH TELEVISION FOR HALF AN HOUR BEFORE YOU GET DOWN TO YOUR REVISION . $ THERE 'S A NEW SERIES , BUILDERS OF BRITAIN , ALL ABOUT THOS E WONDERFUL MERCHANTS AND INVENTORS WHO ADDED LUSTRE TO OUR NAME IN THE NINETEENTH CENTURY . $ < ( SHE GOES , LEAVING NICK AND LYNN ALONE . ) > $ 03 I WISH HE 'D LET ME KNOW WHEN HE 'S GOING TO TAKE THE CAR . $ ... MIKE 'S NOT ON THE PHONE , I CAN'T TELL HIM NOW . $ 04 DID YOU TELL HER ABOUT MY SHIRT IN THE BUREAU OR HAS SHE BEEN SCRABBLING ABOUT AMONG MY THINGS HERSELF ? $ 03 I HAVE ENOUGH TROUBLE WITH ME OWN CLOTHES WITHOUT BOTHERI NG ABOUT YOURS . $ 04 I WISH THEY 'D LET ME ALONE . $ WHAT THE HELL DOES SHE THINK I WANT TO WATCH BUILDERS OF BRI TAIN FOR ? $ WE SAT WATCHING HIS VALIANT YEARS FOR ABOUT EIGHTEEN MONTHS WITH HIM TELLING US WHERE IT WAS ALL WRONG . $ AND HER IDEA OF BEING WELL-INFORMED IS PROGRAMMES ABOUT THE MYRIAD LIFE THAT SEETHES BENEATH THE WASTES OF THE POLAR ICE -CAP ... $ THEY DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING THAT 'S HAPPENING NOW . $ 03 THEY 'VE STRUGGLED , NICK . $ THEY 'VE BEEN THROUGH A LOT . $ THEY 'VE WORKED HARD FOR US , AND OF COURSE THEY 'VE SPOILT YOU PROPERLY . $ YOU 'RE NOT A BIT GRATEFUL FOR ALL MUM DOES FOR YOU . $ YOU ONLY HAVE TO WEAR A SHIRT FOR TEN MINUTES AND SHE 'LL GO AND WASH IT FOR YOU . $ SHE SITS THERE WATCHING YOU ... $ HER EYES ARE ON YOU ALL THE TIME ... $ IF YOU EVEN GET A BLACKHEAD SHE GOES BESERK . $ 04 I DON'T ASK HER TO FUSS OVER ME ... $ ANYWAY , IT GIVES HER SOMETHING TO DO , I MEAN , MOTHERS ARE SAINTS ON EARTH , AREN'T THEY , THAT 'S THEIR JOB . $ 03 FOR SOMEONE WHO 'S ALWAYS MOANING ABOUT HAVING FEELINGS A LL THE TIME , YOU 'RE NOT VERY NICE TO THE PEOPLE WHO SHOULD MATTER TO YOU . $ 04 IT 'S THEM , THEY 'RE CALLOUS TO ME . $ THEY KNOW I 'M AT AN AWKWARD AGE . $ WHAT EFFORT DO THEY MAKE TO UNDERSTAND ME ? ... $ THAT ROW LAST WEEK , JUST 'COS I DIDN'T JUMP IN THE AIR WHEN HE PRESENTED ME WITH A DOZEN DRIVING LESSONS FOR MY BIRTHDA Y . $ 03 EVERY BOY OF YOUR AGE SHOULD BE ABLE TO DRIVE A CAR . $ HOW WILL YOU GET YOUR GIRL-FRIENDS AROUND - IF AND WHEN YOU HAVE ANY ? $ 04 PEOPLE I KNOW DON'T NEED FOUR WHEELS AND AN ENGAGEMENT RI NG BEFORE THEY DARE DO ANYTHING . $ 03 MIKE AND ME ARE GETTING A BIT OF CAPITAL BEHIND US . $ WE DON'T WANT TO FINISH UP IN OTHER PEOPLE'S FURNISHED ROOMS WRANGLING OVER WHETHER WE CAN AFFORD A SUMMER HOLIDAY OR AN OTHER BABY . $ 04 THAT 'S NOT GOING TO BE A MARRIAGE . $ IT 'S GOING TO BE A LIMITED COMPANY . $ VERY LIMITED . $ 03 MIKE WANTS TO FINISH UP WITH A BIT MORE BEHIND HIM THAN F RILLY SHIRTS , MORBID BOOKS AND A FEW TEENAGE TRINKETS . $ 04 WELL , WHATEVER YOU DECK HIM OUT IN HE WOULDN'T LOOK ANY DIFFERENT , HE 'S SO FAT AND HORRIBLE . $ 03 HE 'S BUILT LIKE A MAN OUGHT TO BE , AND HE DOESN'T ENTER TAIN A VERY HIGH OPINION OF YOU EITHER . $ HE DOESN'T KNOW WHO YOU REMIND HIM OF MOST , A CAVALIER OUT OF HISTORY OR A BALLET DANCER . $ 04 HE FANCIES ME I RECKON . $ HE 'S ONLY MARRYING YOU SO 'S HE CAN BE NEAR ME . $ 03 THERE 'S NOT MUCH DOUBT ABOUT HIS MASCULINITY , I CAN ASS URE YOU . $ 04 WELL , YOU OUGHT TO KNOW . $ YOU 'VE SPENT THE LAST FOUR YEARS IN A LAY-BY GROPING ROUND HIS SWEATY JOCK-STRAP . $ 03 YOUR MIND 'S PUTRID INNIT ? $ WE NEVER TOUCHED EACH OTHER BEFORE WE WERE ENGAGED . $ NOWADAYS ALL THEY DO IS JUMP INTO BED WITH ALL AND SUNDRY . $ THERE 'S NO RESPECT FOR THE REAL THING WHEN IT DOES COME ALO NG . $ MIKE AND I ... WE COMPLEMENT EACH OTHER . $ 04 YOU HAVE TO , THERE 'S NO ONE ELSE IS THERE ? $ ALL YOU WANT NOW TO MAKE YOU REALLY MIDDLE-AGED IS FOR YOUR BELLY TO SWELL UP AND HIS TRIBE OF SPASTIC LITTLE FREAKS TO FALL OUT . $ 03 YOU 'RE SICK ... $ THERE 'S A REAL STREAK OF EVIL IN YOU SOMEWHERE . $ YOU NEVER USED TO BE AS BAD AS THAT . $ I EXPECT YOU GET IT ALL FROM LARRY , YOUR NEW MATE . $ 04 I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU 'RE ON ABOUT . $ 03 I HAD QUITE A LONG TALK WITH HIM ON THE PHONE . $ I WASN'T GOING TO TELL YOU . $ WHEN I FOUND OUT IT WAS YOUR TEACHER I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS R IGHT . $ ANYWAY , WHAT ARE YOU DOING GOING ROUND THERE ? $ YOU SEE HIM IN SCHOOL , DON'T YOU ? $ HE SAYS YOU HAVEN'T GOT TO GO ROUND TILL NINE O'CLOCK , AND HE SAID TO ME ' WILL YOU GIVE HIM A MESSAGE ' . $ I THOUGHT TO MYSELF ' NO , I DON'T THINK I WILL , NOT TILL I 'VE HAD A WORD WITH MUM ABOUT IT . ' $ 04 IT 'S NO SECRET . $ MUM SAYS ANYTHING TO DO WITH MY WORK HAS GOT TO BE ENCOURAGE D . $ 03 WELL WHAT DO YOU GO ROUND THERE FOR ? $ I 'D NEVER HAVE DREAMT OF GOING ROUND MY TEACHER'S HOUSE . $ DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY LIVED IN HOUSES . $ AS FAR AS WE KNEW THEY CAME OUT OF THE CUPBOARDS EVERY MORNI NG AND WENT BACK THERE AT NIGHT . $ 04 WE 'RE DISCUSSING A TEXT . $ LARRY SAYS HE CAN'T REALLY GET THROUGH TO US IN THE CLASS 'C OS THERE ARE SO MANY KIDS WHO BUGGER AROUND AND DON'T WANT T O KNOW . $ 03 HE SHOULD HAVE MORE DISCIPLINE . $ #74 $ 04 WE 'RE GOING ROUND TO HELP HIM DUPLICATE HIS NOTES ON ' T HE NUN'S PRIEST'S TALE ' . $ BESIDES , IT 'S THE ONLY PLACE I CAN GO WHERE SOMEBODY WILL LISTEN TO WHAT I 'M TALKING ABOUT AND NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO ALL THE TIME . $ 03 WHAT DO YOU TALK TO HIM ABOUT ? $ 04 ABOUT LIFE AND EXPERIENCE ... AND UNDERSTANDING AND THAT . $ LARRY RECKONS YOU 'VE GOT TO BE A REBEL AGAINST THE HUMAN CO NDITION , AND YOU HAVE TO FORMULATE YOUR IDEAS WHEN YOU 'RE YOUNG . $ AND THAT ONLY COMES FROM DISCUSSION . $ 03 REBELLING I SHOULD THINK IS RIGHT UP YOUR STREET . $ YOU HAVEN'T GOT THE GO IN YOU TO DO ANYTHING ELSE . $ YOU JUST WANT TO BE DIFFERENT . $ 04 YOU HAVEN'T GOT A CLUE ... $ WHAT WE 'RE TRYING TO DO IS A ... REBELLION OF THE SPIRIT .. . $ YOU 'VE GOT TO QUESTION ALL THE VALUES OF MODERN LIFE . $ 03 WHY 'S HE STILL A REBEL THEN AT HIS AGE ? $ I SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT HE 'D GROWN OUT OF IT BY NOW . $ 04 HE 'S NOT VERY OLD . $ HE 'S CLOSER TO US THAN YOU ARE . $ HE WEARS JEANS AND THAT . $ HE EVEN CAME TO SCHOOL IN THEM ONE DAY , BUT JONAH MADE HIM GO HOME AND CHANGE THEM . $ 03 SOUNDS A RIGHT PLACE THAT SCHOOL . $ DO YOU CALL ALL YOUR TEACHERS BY THEIR FIRST NAME ? $ 04 YEH , IF WE WANT TO . $ 03 IT 'S NOT RIGHT , SCHOOLS SHOULD TRAIN YOU FOR LIVING IN THE REAL WORLD . $ 01 < ( RE-ENTERING ) > $ HAS IT FINISHED THEN ? $ 04 WHAT ? $ 01 THAT NICE PROGRAMME I TOLD YOU TO WATCH , THE BUILDERS OF BRITAIN . $ IT WAS SIR HUMPHREY DAVY TONIGHT . $ HE MADE OUR MINES THE SAFE AND PLEASANT PLACES TO WORK IN TH EY ARE TODAY ... $ WHICH IS ONE REASON I CAN NEVER UNDERSTAND WHY THERE 'S SO M UCH ABSENTEEISM AND WHY THEY CAUSE SO MUCH TROUBLE ALL THE T IME . $ 04 YES , MUM . $ I 'M GOING OUT . $ 01 OH . $ I 'VE PUT SOME NICE JAFFA CAKES AND A CUP OF COFFEE ON YOUR BUREAU . $ AREN'T YOU GOING TO DO YOUR REVISION ? $ 03 SAYS HE 'S GOING UP TO HIS TEACHER'S HOUSE , MUM . $ 01 OH THAT NICE MR CALDECOTT . $ HE WAS SO CHARMING TO US ON PARENTS' DAY . $ HE TOLD US NICHOLAS IS DESTINED FOR CAMBRIDGE . $ IT 'S A PITY SCHOOLS DON'T GET MORE TEACHERS LIKE HIM . $ AND THEN TO GIVE UP HIS FREE TIME . $ IT MUST BE A CALLING ... $ YOU FATHER 'S ALWAYS SAYING IT 'S MONEY FOR JAM , BUT IF YOU ASK ME THEY EARN EVERY PENNY . $ 04 WE 'RE DOING SOME NOTES ON THE NUN'S PRIEST'S TALE . $ 01 NUNS , PRIESTS , YES , I 'VE A LOT OF TIME FOR THEM . $ RELIGION IS APT TO GO BY THE BOARD IN TODAY'S HURLY-BURLY . $ 03 ASK HIM TO TEACH YOU A BIT OF RESPECT FOR YOUR PARENTS AN D YOUR SISTER . $ 01 OH I DON'T KNOW , LYNN . $ I DON'T THINK YOU WANT TO MAKE MILK-SOPS OUT OF BOYS . $ A LITTLE BIT OF INDIVIDUALITY DOESN'T DO THEM ANY HARM AT HI S AGE . $ 03 MAKE SURE HE TAKES A KEY THEN . $ ONCE THEY GET TALKING ABOUT LIFE AND EXPERIENCE OR WHATEVER IT IS I EXPECT THEY 'LL BE OBLIVIOUS OF THE PASSING OF TIME . $ < SHE GOES OUT , SAYING ) > $ GOING ROUND TO SEE A SCHOOLTEACHER FOR A NIGHT OUT IS WHAT I CALL SPOOKY . $ 04 < ( SHOUTS AFTER HER ) > $ I HOPE YOU DANCE OFF THE EDGE OF THE WAPPING SHOWBOAT . $ 01 I SHOULDN'T PAY TOO MUCH ATTENTION TO LYNN , DEAR . $ SHE 'S A GOOD GIRL , BUT RATHER INCLINED TO BE A BIT THOUGHT LESS ... $ BUT THEN YOU KNOW WHO SHE GETS IT FROM ... $ HE 'S BEEN A GOOD PROVIDER , NICK , BUT HE 'S NOT EXACTLY TH E MAN I WOULD HAVE CHOSEN TO SPEND A LIFETIME WITH IF I 'D B EEN IN A REAL POSITION TO CHOOSE . $ 04 HE 'S A PEASANT . $ I HAVE TO SCRUB OUT THE BATH 'COS THERE 'S TWO FEET OF SCUM ROUND IT WHEN HE 'S BEEN THERE . $ 01 < ( PERFUNCTORY DEFERENCE TO THE NOTION OF FATHERHOOD ) > $ DON'T TALK LIKE THAT ABOUT YOUR FATHER , NICK . $ IF ANYBODY HAS CAUSE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT HIM IT 'S ME . $ I 'VE IMPROVED HIM OUT OF ALL RECOGNITION . $ WE SHOULD NEVER HAVE GOT ENGAGED , BUT WHEN THE WAR STARTED , I WAS AT A VERY IMPRESSIONABLE AGE , AND HE 'D SET HIS HEA RT ON IT . $ I SUPPOSE HE NEEDED A LIFE-LINE WHEN HE WAS AWAY FIGHTING IN THOSE TERRIBLE PLACES . $ 04 I EXPECT YOU WERE SCARED ALL THE ELIGIBLE MEN WERE GOING TO GET KILLED OFF . $ 01 DON'T THINK THERE WASN'T OPENINGS ... I MIXED WITH ALL SO RTS WHEN I WENT ON THE LAND IN 1940 . $ IT WAS A WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE ... $ ON THE ONE SIDE OF YOU THERE 'D BE A GIRL WHO 'D BEEN A PARL OURMAID , AND ON THE OTHER THERE 'D BE HER EMPLOYER , TITLED LADIES AND ALL ... $ MANY 'S THE TIME WE 'VE DONE THE CARRYING BY MOONLIGHT ... $ WE USED TO SING - $ ' THERE 'S A JOB TO BE DONE THOUGH WE CAN'T FIRE A GUN , WE CAN STILL DO OUR BIT WITH THE HOE ' ... $ ... AND OF COURSE IT WAS IN WILTSHIRE THAT I MET FLIGHT-LIEU TENANT DAVIDSON ... $ HE 'S MADE A BIG NOISE IN THE BUSINESS WORLD SINCE . $ ... I 'VE GOT ALL THE CUTTINGS ABOUT HIS CAREER UPSTAIRS . $ BUT I STUCK BY YOUR FATHER . $ I 'D PROMISED MYSELF TO HIM , YOU SEE ... $ TONY AND I WERE DEEPLY IN LOVE , OF COURSE , BUT I SAID TO H IM , ' TONY , IT WOULD MEAN A LIFETIME OF SELF-REPROACH . ' $ I SAW OTHER GIRLS DOING THE DIRTY ON THEIR FIANCES , AND MY FRIEND JOYCE - REAL COCKNEY GIRL , CHIRPY ISN'T THE WORD - S HE SAID ' LOOK AFTER YOURSELF , LOOK AFTER NUMBER ONE ' , BU T I SAID ' NOOO , I 'VE GOT TO LIVE WITH MY DECISIONS , IT ' D BE A BETRAYAL ... ' $ DID I DO RIGHT , NICHOLAS ? $ 04 YOU SHOULD 'VE FOLLOWED JOYCE'S ADVICE , MUM . $ WE 'D ALL 'VE BEEN BETTER OFF . $ 01 < ( DISAPPOINTED ) > $ I THOUGHT I COULD HAVE COUNTED ON YOU AT LEAST TO SUPPORT ME . $ I 'VE ALWAYS HAD THE HIGHEST PRINCIPLES , NICHOLAS , AND I ' VE TRIED TO DRUM THEM INTO YOU . $ I MADE MY BED AND YOU HEAR ME LAYING ON IT WITHOUT A MURMUR . $ I DON'T ASK FOR SYMPATHY , BUT I DO EXPECT CREDIT FOR DOING WHAT I KNEW WAS RIGHT . $ 04 I THINK DOING WHAT 'S RIGHT IS DOING WHAT 'S GOING TO MAK E YOU HAPPY . $ AS FAR AS I CAN SEE YOU DIDN'T DO RIGHT . $ 01 THERE 'S MORE TO LIFE THAN BEING HUNGRY , NICK . $ I REALISED STRAIGHT AWAY THAT WHAT I HAD DONE WASN'T GOING T O BRING ME HAPPINESS , SO I DECIDED THAT MY FAMILY WERE GOIN G TO HAVE THE BEST OF EVERYTHING . $ YOU DON'T HAVE TO LET UP FOR A MINUTE . $ IT 'S PUSH , PUSH , PUSH ... $ IF I HADN'T BEEN BEHIND HIM HE 'D HAVE BEEN A SMALL COG IN A BIG CONCERN . $ I SAID TO HIM , ' IF YOU 'RE CONTENT TO BE A FITTER FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE , COMING HOME IN GRUBBY OVERALLS EVERY NIG HT , YOU 'LL HAVE TO DO IT ON YOUR OWN . ' $ MIND YOU , HE WORKED LIKE A BLACK , ALL HIS CITY AND GUILDS AND CORRESPONDENCE COURSES . $ ENGLISH TOO , ALTHOUGH IT WAS A REAL UPHILL STRUGGLE FOR HIM . $ WE 'VE ALWAYS BEEN BIG BELIEVERS IN EDUCATION . $ THAT 'S WHY IT WORRIES ME SO , NICK , WHEN I SEE YOU THROWIN G AWAY ALL YOUR ADVANTAGES ... $ WE SAT UP ALL NIGHT THE TIME YOU HAD THAT WHIM ABOUT NOT GOI NG TO UNIVERSITY . $ 04 MUM , ALL THE DEGREES AND QUALIFICATIONS IN THE WORLD DON 'T CHANGE THE KIND OF PERSON YOU ARE ... $ LARRY SAYS HIS BIGGEST HANDICAP SOMETIMES IS HIS DEGREE . $ IT DOESN'T HELP YOUR UNDERSTANDING , STORING ENOUGH FACTS IN YOUR HEAD JUST LONG ENOUGH TO POUR THEM OUT ONE DAY IN AN E XAM PAPER . $ EXPERIENCE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING . $ IT 'S A CRIME TO MAKE AN ACADEMIC DISCIPLINE OUT OF A CREATI VE SUBJECT LIKE ENGLISH . $ LARRY SAYS LANGUAGE IS A LIVING THING , YOU 'VE GOT TO TREAT IT LIKE A LIVING THING . $ THE ONLY REASON I 'M STUDYING LITERATURE IS SO THAT I CAN EX PRESS MYSELF . $ ... HE SAYS AT TIMES MY WRITING 'S GOT ECHOES OF STEINBECK . $ 01 I 'M SURE IT 'S GOOD FOR YOU TO WRITE , NICK , IT STOPS T HINGS GETTING ALL BOTTLED UP AT YOUR AGE , AND WE 'RE GRATEF UL FOR MR CALDECOTT'S GUIDANCE OF COURSE . $ BUT IT WON'T BUY YOU ALL THE THINGS YOU WANT , ESPECIALLY YO U WITH YOUR TASTES AND EXTRAVAGANT WAYS ... I 'M NOT BELITTL ING THE POETS AND DREAMERS , DON'T THINK THAT FOR A MINUTE , WE SHOULD BE THE POORER WITHOUT THEM . $ BUT THERE 'S NOTHING GLAMOROUS ABOUT LIVING IN AN ATTIC , WH ICH IS WHERE THE BOHEMIAN LIFE LEADS YOU . $ 04 NOBODY 'S BEEN A BOHEMIAN FOR AT LEAST A HUNDRED YEARS . $ LOOK AT THE HIPPIE WRITERS . $ THEY LIVE IN COMMUNES , AND THEIR BOOKS ARE PUBLISHED ALL OV ER THE WORLD . $ 01 < ( VEHEMENTLY ) > $ DON'T YOU SING THE PRAISES OF PEOLE LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF ME , THEY 'RE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH . $ DON'T TRY AND WHITEWASH THEM - THEY 'RE THE CANKER IN THE HE ART OF OUR SOCIETY , THERE 'S NO TWO WAYS ABOUT IT . $ 04 OH FOR CHRIST'S SAKE , WHAT 'S THE USE . $ 01 I WON'T HAVE YOU BLASPHEMING , NICHOLAS ... $ THERE 'S TOO MUCH OF IT ABOUT ... $ I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU PICK THESE THINGS UP FROM . $ 04 I DON'T PICK THEM UP FROM ANYBODY . $ I INVENT THEM MYSELF . $ 01 YOU LET YOUR IMAGINATION RUN AWAY WITH YOU SOMETIMES . $ YOUR ECONOMICS TEACHER SAID IN YOUR LAST REPORT . $ ' HIS IMAGINATION NEEDS TO BE TEMPERED BY INDUSTRY AND SELF- DISCIPLINE . ' $ 04 YOU CAN QUOTE EVERY REPORT I 'VE EVER HAD OFF BY HEART , AND IT 'S A WASTE OF TIME 'COS WHEN THEY WRITE THOSE THINGS THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THEY 'RE WRITING ABOUT , AND IT END S UP WITH THE SAME THING ON EVERY ONE . $ 01 THAT 'S NOT TRUE , NICHOLAS , THEY 'VE GOT YOU WEIGHED UP ALL RIGHT . $ #75 $ 04 WELL LARRY SHOULD KNOW , HE DOES IT ALL THE TIME . $ 01 IF HE TELLS YOU THOSE SORT OF THINGS HE GOES RIGHT DOWN I N MY ESTIMATION . $ I SHOULD 'VE THOUGHT HE 'D HAVE A BIT MORE SENSE , THIS MR C ALDECOTT , THIS LARRY AS IT SEEMS HE HAS EVERYBODY CALLING H IM . $ I SAID TO THE HEADMASTER , ' HAS HE GOT A DEGREE ? ' BECAUSE HE HADN'T GOT ONE OF THOSE GOWNS ON THAT ALL THE OTHERS WER E WEARING , BUT HE SAID HE WAS A VERY HIGHLY QUALIFIED MAN . $ HE 'D BEEN AT CAMBRIDGE COLLEGE ... $ BUT ALL THIS RIGMAROLE YOU 'VE BEEN SPOUTING , WELL ... I BE GIN TO WONDER WHAT KIND OF A PERSON HE IS . $ HAS HE GOT ANY CHILDREN OF HIS OWN ? $ 04 HE 'S NOT MARRIED . $ 01 O . $ 04 HE KNOWS ABOUT EVERYTHING , IT 'S NOT JUST ENGLISH ... $ HE PLAYS THESE FANTASTIC BLUES RECORDS OUT OF HIS COLLECTION . $ YOU CAN'T BUY THEM IN THE SHOPS . $ HE SAYS AS SOON AS BESSIE SMITH OPENS HER MOUTH , IT 'S LIKE A CRY OF ANGUISH AND PROTEST FROM OPPRESSED PEOPLES ALL OVE R THE WORLD ... $ HE TAKES US TO ART GALLERIES , NOT MUSEUMS , BUT PLACES WHER E PEOPLE ARE LIVING AND WORKING TODAY . $ HE TOOK US TO AN EXHIBITION OF SCULPTURE , EXPO ROUILLE 71 , WHERE ALL THE OBJECTS WERE CHOSEN BECAUSE THEY SHOWED HOW A WORK OF ART CAN BE CREATED BY THE EFFECTS OF RUST . $ FOR THE ARTIST RUST IS THE EMBODIMENT OF THE CORROSIVE PASSA GE OF TIME ON ALL MATTER . $ 01 WELL THAT 'S AS MAY BE ... $ HE MAY BE VERY GOOD FOR YOU IN SOME WAYS , BUT AT THIS STAGE YOU MUST CONCENTRATE ON YOUR A LEVELS . $ IT 'S LESS THAN TWO MONTHS AWAY , AND THERE 'LL BE TIME FOR ALL YOUR OPPRESSED PEOPLES AND RUSTY ART AFTERWARDS . $ 04 WELL WE 'RE GOING ROUND THERE TO DO SOME WORK TONIGHT . $ 01 WE DON'T WANT YOU OUT TILL ALL HOURS , DARK RINGS UNDER Y OUR EYES , LOOKING RAFFISH AND SEEDY . $ 04 TONE 'S GOING ROUND AS WELL . $ AND DES MAITLAND . $ 01 < ( APPROVINGLY ) > $ O WELL , MRS MAITLAND 'S A VERY NICE PERSON . $ SHE ALWAYS STOPS ME IN THE STORE WHEN I 'M THERE . $ THAT CORNER WAS A REAL EYESORE BEFORE MR MAITLAND CARRIED OU T ALL THOSE IMPROVEMENTS . $ 04 HAVE YOU PRESSED MY FLARES ? $ 01 YES , THEY 'RE READY . $ PUT THAT NICE DARK RED SHIRT ON WITH THEM . $ 04 I EXPECT LARRY 'LL BRING US HOME IN THE CAR . $ 01 NOT TOO LATE THEN . $ REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOU . $ < ( HE GOES UPSTAIRS . $ SHE STARTS TIDYING UP . $ PICKS UP HIS FILE . $ LEAFS THROUGH IT . ) > $ WHAT 'S THIS DOING IN HIS ECONOMICS FILE ? $ < ( READS ALOUD . ) > $ ' THE VOICE OF BESSIE SMITH FILLED THE AIR WITH A PREGNANT H ARSHNESS , AND I TOOK A DEEP DRAUGHT OF THE SMOKE . $ AT ONCE THE WHOLE ROOM WAS A KALEIDOSCOPE OF SHAPE AND COLOU R . $ EVEN THE BEER-STAIN ON THE WALL BECAME CHARGED WITH SIGNIFIC ANCE FOR ME ... $ AND LISSA , LYING THERE WITH THE GOATSKIN DRAPED NEGLIGENTLY OVER HER , HAD NEVER SEEMED MORE DESIRABLE . $ " COME TO ME , " SHE MOANED , CARESSING HER THIGHS ... ' $ < ( SCREAMS , GOES TO THE DOOR , BARELY CONTROLLING HER FURY . ) > $ SMUTTY LITTLE BUGGER ... $ WE 'LL SOON SEE ABOUT THIS . $ NICHOLAS ... NICHOLAS . $ 04 < ( OFF ) $ I 'M CHANGING MY TROUSERS . $ 01 COME DOWN HERE THIS MINUTE . $ 04 WHAT FOR ? $ 01 DO YOU HEAR WHAT I SAY ? $ DO AS YOU 'RE TOLD . $ < ( PAUSE ; HE ENTERS , TRANSFORMED . ) > $ < ( WITH A GREAT DEAL OF CEREMONY . ) > $ SIT DOWN . $ OVER THERE . $ I WANT TO TALK TO YOU . $ 04 I WANT TO GO OUT . $ I SHALL BE LATE . $ 01 NEVER MIND ABOUT THAT . $ HE CAN WAIT ... $ NOW THEN , WHO 'S LISSA , AND I WANT THE TRUTH . $ 04 EH ? $ 01 WHO IS SHE ? $ ... HAVE YOU ... BEEN WITH HER ? $ ... YOU FILTHY LITTLE HOUND . $ 04 < ( ANGER ) > $ YOU 'VE BEEN THROUGH MY PAPERS . $ 01 IT 'S A GOOD THING I DID . $ NIP IT IN THE BUD BEFORE IT GETS OUT OF HAND . $ IN YOUR ECONOMICS FILE AS WELL . $ NOW THEN . $ I WANT A STRAIGHT ANSWER . $ WHO IS SHE ? $ WHO ARE HER PEOPLE ? $ I 'M GOING STRAIGHT ROUND THERE THIS MINUTE . $ 04 YOU 'D HAVE A JOB , THERE 'S NO SUCH PERSON . $ 01 DON'T MAKE THINGS WORSE BY TELLING LIES . $ I 'D RATHER HAVE A THIEF THAN A LIAR . $ 04 < ( EXPLAINS PAINSTAKINGLY ) > $ MUM , IT 'S JUST A STORY ... I MADE IT UP . $ 01 O ... $ O ... $ YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF TO EVER LET SUCH THOUGHTS ENTER YOUR HEAD . $ 04 ALL I WAS TRYING TO DO WAS CREATE AN ATMOSPHERE . $ THE PROBLEM OF SEX IS AT THE ROOT OF OUR WHOLE CIVILISATION , YOU CAN'T EXPECT ME TO IGNORE IT . $ 01 WHAT PROBLEM ? $ I 'VE NEVER FOUND IT A PROBLEM , WHY SHOULD YOU HAVE ANY PRO BLEMS ? $ < ( CONCILIATINGLY ) > $ IT 'S NOT HEALTHY , NICHOLAS , BELIEVE ME . $ 04 MUM , ALL WRITERS FEEL THIS COMPULSIVE NEED TO GET ACROSS EVERYTHING THEY FEEL . $ 01 YOU A WRITER , YOU 'LL NEVER BE A WRITER . $ YOU MUST BE OFF YOUR HEAD . $ WHO 'D WANT TO READ ALL THAT RUBBISH ? $ I 'M DAMN SURE I WOULDN'T . $ 04 YOU 'LL SEE WHEN I 'M WELL KNOWN . $ < ( HE GOES OUT , UNGRACIOUSLY . $ EVELYN APOSTROPHIZES THE EMPTY ROOM . ) > $ 01 THE ONLY PLACE YOU 'LL BE KNOWN IF YOU GO ON WRITING THAT SORT OF STUFF IS ROUND THE COURTS ... $ THE DAMN BUTCHER NEVER DELIVERED AGAIN TODAY . $ IT 'LL HAVE TO BE RUSSIAN CRAB AGAIN FOR TOMORROW'S DINNER . .. $ < ( SHE TURNS ON TELEVISION . $ ANNOYANCE . ) > $ O I 'VE MISSED GIPSY LOVE . $ < ( STRAINS OF GRACE MOORE FROM TELEVISION . ) > $ HER AND RICHARD TAUBER MADE A LOVELY PAIR ... $ A TERRIBLE END SHE HAD ... $ I WONDER IF SHE KNEW HER LIFE WAS GOING TO BE CUT SHORT WHEN SHE WAS MAKING ALL THOSE LOVELY FILMS , BECAME THERE IS A T ERRIBLE SADNESS BEHIND THEM ALL ... $ HIM A WRITER , I 'VE NEVER HEARD ANYTHING SO DAMN RIDICULOUS . $ < ( KNITTING FURIOUSLY , SOPRANO WARBLES , FROM TELEVISION W ITH CHORUS . ) > $ < ACT ONE > $ < SCENE TWO > $ < ( LYNN'S SALON . $ MRS OOSIT SITTING UNDER HAIRDRIER , LYNN BUSY WITH HER HAIR . ) > $ 07 NICE AND TIGHT , DEAR , SPECIALLY ROUND THE BACK . $ I DON'T WANT IT ALL FRIZZING OUT THIS TIME AS SOON AS I WASH IT . $ 03 DID IT REALLY ? $ MUST BE BECAUSE YOUR HAIR 'S SO FINE . $ 07 AH , IT USED TO BE , IT USED TO BE . $ USED TO COME RIGHT DOWN TO MY WAIST BEFORE I HAD ALL THAT TR OUBLE ... $ LONG AS IT LOOKS ALL RIGHT FOR KEV'S WEDDING . $ I 'VE GOT A LOVELY HAT , BUT I WANT IT SO IT SITS NICE ON TO P . $ 03 YOU OUGHT TO HAVE A WIG . $ THEY 'RE EVER SO FASHIONABLE , EVEN AMONG MORE MATURE PEOPLE . $ 07 GOOD GOD GAL , I AIN'T BALD YET . $ 03 PEOPLE WEAR WIGS THESE DAYS LIKE THEY USED TO WEAR HATS . $ YOU CAN GET THEM FOR EVERY OCCASION AND THEY 'RE WASHABLE . $ IT 'S REAL HUMAN HAIR ... $ NUNS AND THAT DONATE IT . $ 07 OO MY GOD , IT 'D GIVE ME THE CREEPS , OTHER PEOPLE'S HAI R ON ME . $ 03 KEVIN WOULDN'T KNOW YOU . $ A NICE BLOND WIG , IT 'D REJUVENATE YOU . $ 07 OO NO . $ A MOTHER SHOULD LOOK LIKE A MOTHER . $ I DON'T WANNA BE LIKE THAT CHRISTINE'S PEOPLE . $ HER MOTHER 'LL BE FLOATIN' ABOUT IN SOME RIGOUT YOU CAN SEE THROUGH - YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO TELL HER FROM THE BRIDESMAIDS ... $ DO YOU KNOW THEM ? $ 03 WHO ARE THEY THEN ? $ 07 THEY 'RE THAT BIG FAMILY GOT THE END HOUSE IN ALMA STREET . $ I 'VE BEEN ROUND THERE ONCE OR TWICE TO MEET THEM , BUT I CO ULDN'T SORT OUT WHO WAS WHO . $ SHE 'S GOT BROTHERS , STEP-BROTHERS AND HALF-BROTHERS AND CH RIST KNOWS WHAT . $ THIS ONE THE OLD WOMAN 'S LIVING WITH AT THE MOMENT , GOD KN OWS WHERE SHE FISHED HIM UP . $ BUT ONE THING I DO KNOW , THE ONLY ALTAR SHE LED HIM TO HAD GOT SHEETS ON . $ THEY 'RE ALWAYS IN TROUBLE , HER SISTER WAS IN THE REFORMATO RY FOR MORAL DANGER WHEN SHE WAS ONLY THIRTEEN . $ I SAID TO KEVIN , ' WHAT DO YOU WANT TO GET MIXED UP WITH PE OPLE LIKE THAT FOR ? ' $ HIS DAD SAID POINT BLANK HE WON'T GO TO THE WEDDING . $ I DUNNO WHETHER HE WILL OR NOT ... $ YOU THINK IT 'S GOIN' TO BE SOMETHING A BIT SPECIAL , SEEING YOUR KIDS MARRIED OFF . $ AND THEN THIS IS WHAT IT TURNS OUT LIKE . $ 03 FROM WHAT I CAN REMEMBER ABOUT KEVIN I SHOULDN'T THINK YO U NEED WORRY ABOUT HIM . $ HE 'LL BE ABLE TO FEND FOR HIMSELF , ... I DO KNOW THEM THOU GH ... I RECKON IT MUST 'VE BEEN THE MOTHER WHO CAME IN HERE TO HAVE HER HAIR DYED , AND I REFUSED TO DO IT , IT WAS THA T FILTHY . $ I THOUGHT WE 'D ABOLISHED VERMINOUS HEADS WITH ALL THE WELFA RE THERE IS ABOUT IN THIS COUNTRY TILL I SET EYES ON HER . $ 07 THAT 'D BE HER . $ < ( LOOKS IN MIRROR . ) > $ THAT 'S NICE , LYNN . $ I THINK I 'D LIKE SOMETHING TO MAKE IT SHINE , THAT CONDITIO NER YOU TOLD ME ABOUT . $ 03 OO YES , AN OCCASION LIKE THIS , MUST LOOK OUT BEST , MUS TN'T WE ? $ I RECOMMEND THE NUMBER FIVE VITAMISED CONDITIONER . $ IT 'S THIRTY TWO AND A HALF NEW PENCE - THAT 'S FIVE AND SIX - BUT IT 'S WORTH IT . $ #76 $ IT 'LL KEEP IT TIGHT BUT SUPPLE . $ 07 I COULD 'VE DONE WITH ALL THIS THIRTY YEARS AGO . $ WE DIDN'T HAVE THESE SALONS ROUND HERE THEN . $ OUR ALICE USED TO DO MINE OF A SATURDAY NIGHT AND CUT ME TOE NAILS AT THE SAME TIME . $ OO , IT HAS GOT A NICE SMELL , DEAR . $ 03 I ALWAYS HAVE THIS WHEN JACKIE DOES MINE . $ OF COURSE PEOPLE HAVE BECOME TERRIBLY HAIR CONSCIOUS THESE L AST FEW YEARS . $ AND YOU 'VE GOT TO BE REAL ARTISTS TO SURVIVE . $ YOU 'VE GOT TO LEARN SO MANY DIFFERENT STYLES , CUTTING , SH APING ... $ I HAD TO DO ANATOMY AT COLLEGE YOU KNOW . $ OF COURSE YOU KNOW YOUR HAIR 'S DEAD . $ IT 'S ONLY ALIVE AT THE ROOTS , IN WHAT YOU CALL THE FOLLICL ES . $ AND DO YOU KNOW , I CAN ALWAYS TELL WHAT STYLE PEOPLE ARE GO ING TO ASK FOR AS SOON AS THEY COME THROUGH THE DOOR ... $ IT MAKES YOU A PROPER JUDGE OF CHARACTER ... $ I 'VE HAD QUITE A FEW MEN IN FROM TIME TO TIME ... $ 07 NEVER . $ 03 OO YES , THEY DON'T THINK ANYTHING OT IT , SOME OF THES Y OUNG ONES YOU KNOW . $ WE HAD FIVE OF THEM IN TOGETHER LAST WEEK , THIS POP GROUP , THE PHOENIX . $ THEY WANTED THEIR SIDE-WHISKERS CURLING . $ 07 O , I 'VE OFTEN WONDERED IF THEY HAVE IT SPECIALLY DONE . $ AREN'T THEY EMBARRASSED ? $ 03 WELL YOU KNOW , IF THAT 'S WHAT THE CUSTOMER WANTS . $ I 'M HERE TO PROVIDE IF FOR THEM . $ OF COURSE I HAVE MY OWN OPINIONS , BUT YOU HAVE TO BE SO TAC TFUL IN BUSINESS ... $ THERE 'S SOME FUNNY TYPES ABOUT , YOU FIND THEM EVERYWHERE . $ 07 WELL , THERE IS LYNN , YOU 'VE SAID IT THERE ... $ THERE 'S ... UM ... I 'VE HAD SOMETHING ON MY MIND , SAYING THAT BROUGHT IT BACK TO ME ... $ BUT I DON'T KNOW WHETHER I OUGHT TO TELL YOU OR NOT ... $ < ( DECISIVELY ) > $ YOU KNOW I TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT BLOKE WHO MOVED INTO THE FLAT ABOVE US LAST AUGUST ? $ THE ONE I CAUGHT SUNBATHING ON OUR ROOF , THE ONE I HAD TO T ELL ABOUT WALTZING ROUND WITH NEXT TO NOTHING ON ... $ 03 < ( ABSENTLY ) > $ YOU 'VE GOT A BIT THERE I MISSED ... I 'LL JUST HAVE TO PUT IT RIGHT ... $ YES ? $ 07 WELL , HE 'S BEEN GETTING FRED AND ME DOWN . $ PEOPLE RINGING THE WRONG BELL ALL HOURS , I GET SICK AND TIR ED OF TELLING THEM ... $ AND THE FUNNY PART ABOUT IT IS THEY 'RE NEARLY ALL YOUNG BOY S ... $ 03 < ( WITH INTEREST ) > $ OH ? $ 07 WELL , ONE NIGHT LAST WEEK - IT WAS THAT NIGHT WE HAD THE GALE , FRED SAID GET UP AND SHUT THAT WINDOW , AND WHEN I W ENT DOWN HE 'D GOT THAT RECORD PLAYER ON FULL BLAST . $ I SAID , ' IT 'S GOT BEYOND A JOKE . $ I 'M NOT HAVING IT , ' AND OF COURSE FRED WOULDN'T MOVE SO I HAD TO BE THE ONE . $ I BANGED ON HIS DOOR , BUT I RECKON THEY DIDN'T HEAR ME . $ I BANGED AGAIN , STILL NOTHING HAPPENED . $ I THOUGHT , 'YES YOU BUGGERS , I KNOW YOU 'RE THERE . ' $ THEN I HEARD ALL THIS SCUFFLING . $ I DON'T KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON , AND I DON'T WANT TO KNOW . $ I BET I STOOD THERE TEN MINUTES . $ THEN EVENTUALLY I TRIED THE DOOR . $ IT WAS LOCKED AND BOLTED . $ THEN HE DRAWS BACK THE BOLT , OPENS THE DOOR ABOUT HALF AN I NCH AND SAYS ' WHAT DO YOU WANT ? ' $ I SAID ' WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DO YOU RECKON I WANT THIS TIME OF NIGHT ? $ I WANT THAT NOISE OFF . ' $ AND HE SAID TO ME , ' YOU BUGGER OFF , YOU NOSY OLE COW . ' $ I SAID , ' I 'LL GET AN AXE TO THE BLOODY THING AND TO YOU A S WELL IF YOU CHEEK ME LIKE THAT , ' AND AS SOON AS I SET FO OT INSIDE THE DOOR , WHO DO YOU THINK I SAW LAYING ON THE CO UCH ? ... $ THERE HE WAS , A FAG IN ONE HAND , A BOTTLE OF BEER IN THE O THER AND LAUGHING HIS HEAD OFF . $ YOUR NICK . $ AT ONE O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING . $ 03 COULDN'T A-BIN . $ MUM AND DAD DON'T LET HIM STAY OUT THAT LATE . $ 07 IT WAS HIM ALL RIGHT . $ I SAID , ' YES I KNOW WHO YOU ARE , I KNOW YOUR SISTER , SHE DOES MY HAIR ' . $ WHAT WAS GOING ON I DON'T KNOW , AND I DON'T WANT TO KNOW . $ BUT I THOUGHT I OUGHT TO TELL YOU . $ I 'VE BEEN WORRYING ABOUT IT ALL WEEK . $ DID I DO THE RIGHT THING ? $ 03 I THINK YOU 'VE MADE A MISTAKE , MRS OOSIT ... $ WHAT 'S THIS BLOKE'S NAME ANYWAY ? $ 07 OH , WAIT A MINUTE , IT 'LL COME BACK TO ME . $ HE PUT A CARD UP NEXT TO OUR DOORBELL . $ I NOTICED IT THE OTHER DAY . $ I SAID TO FRED WE 'LL HAVE THAT BUGGER DOWN , I THOUGHT IT W AS A FUNNY NAME AT THE TIME ... LAURENCE CALDECOTT HE CALLS HIMSELF . $ 03 OO ... $ < ( ANXIOUS TO MINIMISE ANY SCANDAL ) > $ THAT 'S THE MYSTERY SOLVED THEN ... $ THAT 'S HIS TEACHER . $ HE 'S BEEN GOING THERE A LOT LATELY . $ HE HELPS HIM WITH HIS HOMEWORK . $ 07 AT THAT TIME OF THE MORNING ? $ IF HE 'S A TEACHER HE WANTS TO START BEHAVING LIKE ONE . $ I 'VE NEVER HEARD SUCH LANGUAGE . $ HE 'S NO BETTER THAN THE KIDS HE ALWAYS HAS HANGING ROUND HI M . $ MAN OF HIS AGE , DRESSING UP IN THEM JEANS ... $ AND IF I WAS YOU I 'D HAVE A WORD WITH YOUR NICK , GOING ROU ND THERE SO LATE , DRINKING AND SWEARING AND THAT ... I THOU GHT TO MYSELF ' I SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT HIS MUM AND DAD WOULD HAVE KEPT AN EYE ON HIM A BIT MORE . ' $ 'COS HE 'S KNOWN , YOU KNOW , THIS MR CALDECOTT , THEY ALL G IVE HIM EVEN SUCH A BAD NAME , ALL DOWN CLISSOLD STREET . $ THEY ALL TALK ABOUT HIM . $ HE 'S NOT THE KIND OF PERSON I 'D HAVE LET MY KEVIN GO HANGI NG ROUND ... I MEAN , THEY 'RE SO IMPRESSIONABLE AT THAT AGE ... I ALWAYS THOUGHT THEY HAD SUCH GREAT PLANS FOR YOUR NIC K , BUT THAT AIN'T THE WAY TO GO ABOUT IT ... I 'VE SEEN THI S KIND OF THINGS HAPPEN ... $ IT AIN'T GOOD TO MIX WITH PEOPLE OLDER THAN YOURSELF ... $ WHAT DOES HE WANT WITH KIDS ROUND HIM ANYWAY ? $ THE ONLY KIDS HE OUGHT TO HAVE ARE KIDS OF HIS OWN AT THAT A GE ... $ WHICH THERE AIN'T MUCH CHANCE OF FROM WHAT I CAN SEE ... $ < ( FADE WHILE SHE IS STILL TALKING . ) > $ < ACT ONE > $ < SCENE THREE > $ < ( THE PARGETERS . $ MEAL JUST FINISHED . $ SUBDUED SHOCK , ANGER . $ TENSION AND SILENCE . $ ATMOSPHERE OF OPPRESSIVE DISAPPROVAL . ) > $ 03 < ( RISING HYSTERIA ) > $ HOW DO YOU THINK I FELT ? $ I FELT ASHAMED AND HUMILIATED , TO HEAR THOSE SORT OF THINGS FROM A WOMAN LIKE THAT . $ I HATED HER . $ I COULD HAVE STUCK THE DRIER ON HER HEAD AND TURNED IT UP TO A THOUSAND VOLTS ... $ 'COURSE I HAD TO TRY AND MAKE LIGHT OF IT FOR THE SAKE OF TH E FAMILY , BUT SHE KNEW ... $ I HAD TO LEAVE JACKIE IN CHARGE , AND GOD KNOWS WHAT 'LL HAP PEN TO THE MONEY IN THE TILL ... $ I FELT SICK . $ I COULDN'T HAVE DONE ANOTHER HEAD THIS AFTERNOON , THE WAY I FELT ... $ I WAS TREMBLING ALL OVER . $ 01 HIS FATHER 'LL HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS , IT NEEDS A MAN . $ THESE THINGS ARE TOO MUCH FOR A WOMAN'S FRAIL SHOULDERS . $ 02 WE 'VE NEVER HAD ANY TROUBLE LIKE THIS IN OUR FAMILY . $ WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH YOU , NICK ? $ 01 < ( INFURIATED WITH HIS MILDNESS ) > $ I SHOULD THINK A BLOODY GOOD HIDING 'D BE A START . $ IT 'S MY FAULT , I BLAME MYSELF . $ I 'VE BEEN TOO LAX WITH YOU . $ I 'VE LET YOU GET ROUND ME . $ YOU 'VE HAD YOUR OWN WAY TOO MUCH , AND YOU 'VE BEEN WORSE S INCE YOU 'VE BEEN IN THAT SIXTH FORM . $ COURSE , NOW IT ALL FALLS INTO PLACE . $ NO WONDER HE LEFT NO STONE UNTURNED TRYING TO PERSUADE US TO LET YOU STAY ON . $ 02 I WAS NEVER A HUNDRED PER CENT IN FAVOUR OF HIS STAYING O N . $ IT 'S NOT HEALTHY TO BE SITTING AT A DESK AT YOUR AGE . $ WHAT THEY WANT AT EIGHTEEN IS AN ACTIVE LIFE . $ ' STAGNANT POOLS BREED DISEASE , ' I 'VE ALWAYS SAID SO . $ 03 EVERYBODY KNOWS . $ ALL CLISSOLD STREET 'S TALKING ABOUT IT . $ ... IT 'LL ALL REBOUND ON THE BUSINESS THAT I 'VE SLAVED TO WORK UP . $ 04 < ( FURY ) > $ BE A BLOODY GOOD JOB IF IT CLOSES DOWN . $ HALF THE SCANDALS ROUND HERE ARE FABRICATED IN THAT BLOODY P LACE . $ 01 DON'T YOU DARE TURN ROUND ON YOUR SISTER AFTER WHAT YOU ' VE DONE TO HER . $ YOU CAN NEVER MAKE UP FOR WHAT YOU 'VE DONE . $ THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS HELP US TO SORT OUT ALL THIS SORDIDN ESS . $ 04 WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO HAVE DONE ANYWAY ? $ 02 THAT 'S WHAT WE WANT TO KNOW . $ 04 THERE 'S NOTHING TO KNOW . $ 01 THERE 'S WAYS OF FINDING OUT ... $ < ( WILDLY ) > $ DOCTORS CAN TELL . $ THEY CAN DO TESTS . $ YOU 'D DO BETTER TO MAKE A CLEAN BREAST OF IT HERE AND NOW D ID HE ... DID HE INTERFERE WITH YOU ? $ < ( ANGRY; EMBARRASSED TURNS UPON HUSBAND ) > $ WHY AM I HAVING TO ASK HIM ALL THESE QUESTIONS , HIS MOTHER ? $ THIS IS YOUR JOB . $ ASK HIM . $ GO ON . $ 02 < ( WEAKLY ) > $ DID HE INTERFERE WITH YOU ? $ 03 < ( BURSTS INTO TEARS ) > $ I SHALL HAVE TO CLOSE DOWN . $ 04 THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO 'VE EVER INTERFERED WITH ME ARE YOU L OT . $ 01 < ( WHISPERS HOARSELY ) > $ I DON'T THINK HE UNDERSTANDS ... $ DID HE ... $ 04 OF COURSE I BLOODYWELL UNDERSTAND . $ YOU DON'T THINK I 'D HAVE GONE ROUND THERE ALL THE TIME IF H E 'D BEEN THE KIND OF BLOKE WHO SITS NEXT TO YOU IN THE PICT URES ... $ 01 NICHOLAS , HOW CAN YOU TREAT SUCH TERRIBLE THINGS SO CASU ALLY ... $ IT 'S THE MOST AWFUL THING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO A YOUNG BOY . $ 04 NOTHING HAS HAPPENED . $ 01 I DON'T BELIEVE YOU ... $ LOOK AT YOUR SISTER , IT 'S BROKEN HER HEART . $ 02 IF WE CAN'T GET IT OUT OF YOU , WE 'LL HAVE TO GO TO THE POLICE AND THEY WILL . $ #77 $ 01 THEY PUT YOU IN A ROOM WITH LIGHTS IN YOUR EYES . $ THEY 'LL GET TO THE TRUTH . $ 02 WHAT WAS THE ATTRACTION ROUND THERE THEN ? $ WHY WERE YOU ALWAYS ROUND THERE HALF THE NIGHT ? $ 04 'COS I GOT A BIT OF UNDERSTANDING AND ENCOURAGEMENT . $ 01 UNDERSTANDING IS IT ? $ WE UNDERSTAND YOU , AND HIM . $ 04 HE HELPED ME . $ HE TALKED TO ME ABOUT BOOKS ... AND LITERATURE ... AND GOD . $ 01 HOW CAN YOU TALK ABOUT GOD IN THE SAME BREATH ? $ IT 'S A WONDER HE DOESN'T STRIKE YOU DUMB . $ I KNOW I SHOULD ... I CAN SEE HE 'S CORRUPTED YOU THROUGH AN D THROUGH . $ 02 DID HE EVER TALK TO YOU ABOUT SEX ? $ 04 COURSE HE DID . $ 01 I THOUGHT AS MUCH . $ 02 WHAT DID HE SAY ? $ 04 HE SAID IT WAS THE MOST WONDERFUL EXPERIENCE IN THE WORLD . $ 01 WHAT DOES HE KNOW ABOUT IT ? $ HE 'S NOT EVEN MARRIED . $ 04 HE KNOWS A LOT . $ HE 'S ONLY INTERPRETING ALL THE MODERN PSYCHOLOGISTS AND DOC TORS AND THAT . $ 01 IT 'S ALL HOOEY AND DON'T LET ANYBODY TELL YOU ANY DIFFER ENT . $ HE WAS JUST HIDING BEHIND THEM TO JUSTIFY HIS OWN WICKED DES IGNS . $ 04 I 'VE NEVER KNOWN ANYONE MORE NORMAL IN MY LIFE . $ 03 WELL , YOU 'RE NO JUDGE ... $ MRS OOSIT DON'T THINK SO . $ 04 WELL , IF SHE 'S WHAT 'S NORMAL I DON'T WANNA BE LIKE HER . $ 01 YOU HEAR HIM ? $ HE STANDS THERE AND ADMITS HE DOESN'T WANT TO BE NORMAL . $ 04 LARRY SAYS SHE PERFORMS OPERATIONS FOR HER FRIENDS WITH A KNITTING NEEDLE . $ 01 DON'T BE DISGUSTING . $ THAT KIND OF SMUT DOESN'T IMPROVE YOU . $ WHO WOULD THINK TO HEAR YOU NOW THAT YOU 'D WON PRIZES FOR E LOCUTION WHEN YOU WERE ELEVEN . $ 02 NOW LISTEN NICK , WE 'RE NOT BLAMING YOU ... $ NOTHING 'S GOING TO HURT YOU IF YOU LET IT ALL COME OUT ... $ YOU MAY THINK YOU 'RE TRYING TO SHIELD THIS MAN OUT OF SOME SENSE OF LOYALTY , BUT DON'T . $ HE 'LL ONLY BE ABLE TO CARRY ON AND DO HARM TO OTHER YOUNG B OYS . $ 04 HE HASN'T DONE ANY HARM . $ 01 YOU MAY NOT THINK SO , BUT WE 'VE SEEN THE RESULTS OF IT , AND IT 'S A SORRY SPECTACLE . $ WE 'VE SEEN YOU GROW MORE COARSE AND DEGRADED DAY BY DAY . $ 04 WHAT YOU CAN'T BEAR IS THE THOUGHT THAT I SHOULD EVER GRO W BEYOND THE AGE OF PUBERTY . $ 01 YOU 'RE STILL NOT OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW YOUR OWN MIND , AND YOU 'VE GOT TO BE PROTECTED FROM MEN LIKE HIM . $ 02 LET ME DEAL WITH HIM , EV . $ JUST CALM DOWN A BIT ... $ NOW LOOK , SON , YOU SAY HE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING TO YOU ... $ ALL RIGHT , FAIR ENOUGH . $ HAS HE ... SAID ANYTHING ? $ 04 OF COURSE HE 'S SAID THINGS . $ 01 SO YOU ADMIT HE 'S MADE OVERTURES ? $ NOW WE 'RE GETTING AT IT . $ 04 ALL HE DID WAS TALK TO ME . $ WE TALKED AND TALKED . $ HE SAID HE COULD TALK TO ME LIKE HE COULDN'T TALK TO ANYONE ELSE . $ 01 O DID HE ? $ WELL , IF THAT ISN'T TANTAMOUNT TO A CONFESSION I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS . $ 03 MRS OOSIT SAID SHE CAUGHT YOU LAYING ON THE SOFA WITH A B OTTLE OF BEER IN ONE HAND AND A CIGARETTE IN THE OTHER . $ WHATEVER ELSE HE 'S DONE , HE 'S LED YOU INTO BAD WAYS ... $ AND WHY WAS THE DOOR LOCKED ? $ 04 < ( EXASPERATED ) > $ IT DIDN'T SHUT PROPERLY , THAT 'S ALL . $ 01 WELL , I THINK THAT 'S CONCLUSIVE . $ HASN'T THIS CHARADE GONE ON LONG ENOUGH ? $ NICHOLAS , LET 'S AT LEAST BE HONEST WITH EACH OTHER ... $ THAT BOOK HE BOUGHT YOU LAST CHRISTMAS . $ I LOOKED AND SAW WHAT HE 'D WRITTEN INSIDE IT . $ I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY AT THE TIME , BUT DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING BECAUSE YOU SEEMED TO BE GETTING ON SO WELL AT SCHOOL ... $ ' TO A DEAR FRIEND AND PUPIL . ' $ MEN DON'T WRITE THOSE KIND OF THINGS . $ THE EVIDENCE IS OVERWHELMING NICHOLAS . $ IT 'S BEEN MORE THAN AN ORDINARY FRIENDSHIP , HASN'T IT . $ 03 FRIENDS AT THAT AGE . $ HE SHOULD BE PAST THAT BY NOW . $ 02 < ( SUDDEN INSIGHT ) > $ HE GAVE YOU THAT RED SHIRT , DIDN'T HE . $ YOU DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO BUY THAT , I DO KNOW . $ 04 IT WAS HIS . $ HE DIDN'T WANT IT . $ 03 I 'M NOT SURPRISED . $ A GREAT GROWN MAN LIKE THAT BUYING RED SHIRTS . $ HE MUST HAVE WANTED HIS HEAD TESTING . $ 02 WE 'LL BURN THE BLOODY THING RIGHT AWAY ... $ WE DON'T WANT IT IN THIS HOUSE ... $ WHERE IS IT ? ... $ 03 I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE SO PARTICULAR ABOUT YOUR CLOTHE S , YOU WOULDN'T HAVE WANTED OTHER PEOPLE'S . $ OF COURSE , IF IT 'S LARRY'S IT MUST BE A BIT SPECIAL . $ < ( JIM GOES OUT PURPOSEFULLY FOR A SYMBOLIC GESTURE . ) > $ 01 AND WHAT EFFECT ALL THIS TURMOIL IS GOING TO HAVE ON YOUR STUDIES WE SHALL NEVER KNOW . $ AND OF COURSE THERE CAN BE NO QUESTION OF GOING ON WITH ENGL ISH AFTER ALL THIS . $ AND YOU KNOW AS WELL AS I DO THAT IF YOU DON'T GET TWO GRADE ONES AT A LEVEL YOU 'LL NEVER GET INTO UNIVERSITY WITH ALL THE COMPETITION , LET ALONE CAMBRIDGE . $ THAT BUREAU I BOUGHT YOU WITH THE SILVER INKSTAND . $ ALL POURED DOWN THE DRAIN . $ WE CAN'T USE THEM ... $ THE MONEY I 'VE SACRIFICED . $ IT 'S NOT YOUR FATHER BEEN DOING IT , IT 'S ME . $ I 'VE HAD TO CURTAIL MY SOCIAL LIFE . $ I 'D SET MY HEART ON THE CIVIL BALL , WHAT WITH LIONEL BEING CHAIRMAN OF BATHS AND WASHHOUSES THIS YEAR , BUT IT WAS MOR E THAN I DARED DO TO PUT IN AN APPEARANCE . $ I DIDN'T HAVE A RAG FIT TO BE SEEN IN . $ 03 < ( TEARFUL ) > $ I DON'T KNOW HOW I SHALL FACE MIKE WHEN HE HEARS , IF HE HA SN'T HEARD ALREADY ... $ HE 'LL GO MAD ... $ HE HATES ANYTHING LIKE THAT . $ HE 'LL BE FURIOUS IF I HAVE TO GIVE UP THE SALON ... I SHALL BE NO ASSET TO HIM WITHOUT THAT . $ YOU DON'T THINK OF THE INNOCENT WHO SUFFER FROM YOUR IRRESPO NSIBLE CONDUCT . $ 02 < ( RE-ENTERS . $ SATISFACTION IN VOICE ) > $ I 'VE TORN IT UP . $ IT 'LL MAKE GOOD CAR POLISHERS , NO ONE 'LL WEAR THAT AGAIN . $ NOW THEN , ARE YOU OR ARE YOU NOT GOING TO ADMIT IT , OR MUS T WE TAKE IT FURTHER ? $ 03 WE SHALL HAVE TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF IT SOMEHOW . $ 02 HE WAS ALWAYS WILFUL . $ 01 WELL HE GETS THAT FROM YOU . $ 03 IT 'S WRITTEN ALL OVER HIS FACE WHAT HE IS . $ 02 I COULD SEE ALL THIS HAPPENING . $ YOU SPOILT HIM . $ 01 AND YOU SHIRKED YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES TOWARDS HIM . $ 03 WELL , HE WAS YOUR FAVOURITE , WASN'T HE ? $ 01 THERE WAS NEVER A MORE IMPARTIAL MOTHER , YOU WICKED GIRL . $ 02 IF I 'D BEEN ALLOWED TO DISCIPLINE HIM I 'D HAVE KNOCKED IT ALL OUT OF HIM . $ 01 YOU 'VE NEVER HAD THE GUTS TO RAISE YOU HAND TO HIM , IT 'S ALWAYS BEEN LEFT TO ME TO GET SOME SENSE OF RIGHT AND WRO NG INTO HIM . $ YOU 'RE THE ROOT OF IT IF ANYBODY IS . $ IF HE 'S SPINELESS THERE 'S ONLY ONE PERSON HE GETS IT FROM . $ 03 LOOK , YOU TWO , THIS IS WHAT HE 'S TRYING TO MAKE US DO . $ QUARREL AMONG OURSELVES SO HE GETS OUT OF THE LIMELIGHT . $ HE MUST BE PUNISHED AND IT 'S YOUR JOB TO SEE HE GETS WHAT ' S COMING TO HIM . $ 01 I CAN THINK OF NO PUNISHMENT THAT 'S FIT FOR PEOPLE LIKE HIM , IN CHARGE OF YOUNG PEOPLE . $ THEY WORM THEIR WAY INTO POSITIONS OF TRUST AND THEN THEY - $ 04 < ( INTERRUPTING ) > $ IF YOU 'LL JUST SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME I 'LL TELL YOU THE TRUTH . $ 01 HOW SHALL WE KNOW IT IS THE TRUTH AFTER THIS TISSUE OF LI ES WE 'VE HEARD ? $ 04 LOOK , I SAID SHUT UP . $ 01 OO NICHOLAS , MY HEART TROUBLE , YOU 'VE STARTED IT ALL U P AGAIN . $ 04 < ( IGNORING HER ) > $ LOOK , HE HASN'T TOUCHED ME OR MOLESTED ME OR DONE ANYTHING TO ME . $ ALL HE 'S DONE IS TO HAVE SOME FEELING FOR ME , SOMETHING WH ICH IS OBVIOUSLY LACKING HERE . $ AND I 'VE BEEN GRATEFUL FOR IT , WHAT HE SAYS AND HOW HE FEE LS . $ 01 NOW IT 'S COMING OUT . $ IF HE 'S CAPABLE OF FEELINGS HE 'S CAPABLE OF ACTIONS . $ 04 < ( VEHEMENCE ) > $ YOU 'VE MADE A FETISH OUT OF SUPPRESSING YOUR OWN FEELINGS A ND YOU 'RE A LYNCHING PARTY ON THE RAMPAGE FOR ANY SIGN OF I T IN ANYONE ELSE . $ YOU WERE THE MOB WHO DANCED TILL THEY DROPPED ROUND THE BONF IRES AT WITCH-BURNINGS . $ 01 DANCING ? $ I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU 'RE TALKING ABOUT . $ I HATE DANCING AND ALWAYS HAVE DONE . $ 03 THAT 'S HIM TALKING NOW INNIT ? $ IF Y ' ASK ME HE 'S BRAINWASHED YOU . $ < ( DOORBELL PLAYS MELODIC CHIME . ) > $ MIKE ! $ WE CAN'T TELL HIM ... I COULDN'T GO OUT NOW . $ 01 HE 'LL HAVE TO KNOW SOONER OR LATER , LYNN , AND BETTER F ROM US THAN FROM OUTSIDE GOSSIP . $ 04 I 'M NOT GOING TO SIT HERE AND FACE AN INQUISITION FROM H IM . $ 01 YOU STAY WHERE YOU ARE NICHOLAS , I HAVEN'T FINISHED WITH YOU . $ 04 I 'M GONNA LOCK MYSELF IN THAT STUDY , AND IF YOU DON'T L ET ME ALONE I 'LL SMASH THE BLOODY BUREAU AND THROW YOUR INK STAND OUT OF THE WINDOW AND COVER YOUR HUNDRED QUIDSWORTH OF PINE WITH OBSCENITIES . $ #78 $ < ( LYNN GOES TO THE DOOR ; NICK GOES OUT WITH GREAT RESOLUT ION . ) > $ 01 I WOULDN'T PUT THAT PAST HIM . $ HE 'S GOT A MALICIOUS DESTRUCTIVE NATURE WHEN HE GIVES VENT TO IT . $ < ( ENTER LYNN , WORRIED AND SUBDUED , WITH MIKE . ) > $ YOU MUST EXCUSE US MIKE IF WE APPEAR UNHOSPITABLE , BUT WE ' VE GOT TERRIBLE TROUBLE . $ 03 I 'LL TELL HIM LATER MUM . $ 01 NO , THAT WON'T DO . $ IT CONCERNS ALL OF US . $ SIT DOWN , MIKE . $ 02 IT 'S NICHOLAS . $ 06 HAS HE HAD AN ACCIDENT ? $ 01 IF IT WAS JUST A QUESTION OF PUTTING AN ARM IN A SPLINT W E SHOULDN'T ALL BE SICK WITH WORRY . $ IT ALWAYS GOES STRAIGHT TO MY STOMACH , THIS KIND OF THING , IT BRINGS ON MY ACIDITY . $ 06 WHAT 'S HE DONE THEN ? $ 01 BLUNTLY , MIKE , THERE 'S BEEN SOME UNSAVOURY BUSINESS WI TH A SCHOOLTEACHER . $ 03 < ( CRYING HYSTERICALLY ) > $ DON'T TELL ME , MUM , I SHALL LOSE HIM . $ 06 COME ON LYNN , THERE 'S NO NEED FOR HYSTERICS WHATEVER IT IS . $ < ( TURNS TO JIM . ) > $ WHAT 'S UPSET HER LIKE THIS ? $ 02 THIS TEACHER AT SCHOOL HAS BEEN TRYING IT ON WITH OUR NIC K . $ 01 AND THAT 'S NOT THE WORSE OF IT . $ NICHOLAS GAVE US NO INKLING OF WHAT WAS HAPPENING . $ BUT FORTUNATELY , WE 'RE PRAYING THAT THE WORST HASN'T HAPPE NED , AND I DON'T THINK IT HAS . $ I KNOW MY OWN CHILD . $ LYNN HAD THE FIRST SHOCK OF IT ALL BECAUSE SHE HAD IT FIRST HAND . $ 03 < ( TEARFULLY ) > $ HOW I FINISHED DOING HER HAIR I SHALL NEVER KNOW . $ 06 < ( BEWILDERED ) > $ WHOSE HAIR ? $ 03 WELL , MRS OOSIT CAME IN AND WANTED HER HAIR DOING SPECIA L FOR HER KEVIN'S WEDDING - AND I DON'T GIVE THAT SIX MONTHS BY WHAT SHE WAS SAYING - AND SHE 'D TOLD ME ABOUT THIS BLOK E BEFORE THAT LIVED OVER HER , WHAT PECULIAR WAYS HE 'D GOT . $ AND SHE WENT UP ONE NIGHT 'COS THEY WERE KICKING UP A NOISE AND SHE FOUND OUR NICK THERE ... ALONE WITH HIM . $ 06 I 'M SHOCKED , BUT NOT SURPRISED QUITE FRANKLY . $ 03 BUT MRS OOSIT , YOU KNOW WHAT SHE IS . $ EVERYBODY WE KNOW 'LL BE TEARING US TO PIECES TOMORROW . $ I SHALL BE ASHAMED TO LOOK MY CUSTOMERS IN THE FACE . $ I CAN'T GO TO WORK TOMORROW , I SHOULD BREAK DOWN . $ AND I CAN'T EXPECT YOU TO BE DRAGGED DOWN IN ALL THIS MIKE . $ < ( PAUSE . ) > $ THAT 'S WHY I 'VE DECIDED TO LET YOU HAVE YOUR FREEDOM IF YO U WANT IT . $ 06 NO , LYNN . $ < ( MAGNANIMOUS . ) > $ THAT 'S NOT MY WAY . $ I 'M NOT THE TYPE OF BLOKE THAT 'D LEAVE YOU IN THE LURCH AT A TIME WHEN YOU NEED ALL THE HELP YOU CAN GET . $ YOU NEED A YOUNGER MAN WHO KNOWS HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS KIND OF THING . $ THIS KIND OF KINKINESS IS ON THE INCREASE , YOU KNOW . $ HOW OLD IS HE ? $ 01 HE 'S ONLY A YOUNGER MAN , AND I REGRET TO SAY WE WERE AL L TAKEN IN BY HIM , EVEN US , AND I 'M A VERY GOOD JUDGE OF CHARACTER . $ 02 HE SEEMED ALL RIGHT TO ME AT THE TIME . $ 06 OH , THEY 'LL TRY AND TAKE YOU IN IF THEY SEE YOU 'RE GON NER FALL FOR IT . $ SOME OF 'EM ARE EVEN MARRIED , YOU KNOW . $ IS THIS ONE ? $ 01 HE SAID HE HAD A FIANCEE . $ 06 THERE YOU ARE THEN . $ 02 WE WERE WONDERING IF IT WAS A CASE FOR THE POLICE . $ WE FEEL SO HELPLESS . $ AND NICK DEFIED US . $ 06 WHERE IS HE ? $ SHALL I GO AND HAVE A WORD WITH HIM ? $ HE 'D TAKE NOTICE OF ME . $ 01 OH HE 'S IN HIS ROOM SULKING . $ 02 HE DOESN'T EVEN SEEM TO REALISE HE 'S DONE SOMETHING WRON G . $ 06 < ( SERIOUS AND PORTENTOUS ) > $ THERE 'S TIMES WHEN THE PRIVATE CITIZEN HAS NO OPTION BUT TO TAKE THINGS INTO HIS OWN HANDS ... $ IF YOU LOOK AROUND WHAT DO YOU SEE ? $ LAW AND ORDER MADE A MOCK OF , RESPECT FOR NEITHER LIFE OR P ROPERTY . $ YOU CAN'T BLAME PEOPLE SLEEPING WITH A GUN UNDER THEIR PILLO W . $ IT SHOULDN'T HAVE TO BE IN A CIVILISED COUNTRY , BUT IT IS . $ 01 MR TREWIN NEXT DOOR BUT ONE WHO KEEPS THE FANCY GOODS HAS GOT A GRENADE THAT HASN'T GONE OFF . $ HE BROUGHT IT BACK FROM TOBRUK IN THE LAST WAR . $ AND HE SAYS THE FIRST PERSON WHO BREAKS INTO HIS PROPERTY OR SETS A FINGER ON ANY ONE OF HIS FAMILY WILL GET IT STRAIGHT IN THEIR FACE . $ HE SAYS HE WOULDN'T HESITATE TO USE IT WHATEVER THE CONSEQUE NCES . $ 06 A CASE LIKE THIS , WE 'VE GOT TO BE THE ONES TO ACT IF HE 'S NOT TO GO UNPUNISHED . $ YOU CAN BET YOUR BOTTOM DOLLAR NICK 'S NOT THE FIRST . $ WHAT ABOUT THAT YOUTH LEADER IN THE PAPER , HE ADMITTED IT T O THE PEOPLE'S REPORTER . $ AND WHEN THEY DID GET HIM HE ASKED FOR 37 OTHER OFFENCES TO BE TAKEN INTO CONSIDERATION . $ AND IF WE DON'T DO SOMETHING IT 'LL GO ON . $ I MEAN , HE 'S GOT CARTE BLANCHE , A TEACHER ABUSING HIS POS ITION . $ THIS IS A TIME WHEN PUBLIC OPINION CAN DAMAGE THE SWINE MORE THAN THE LAW CAN . $ THEY 'RE TOO BUSY SITTING IN LAY-BYS WAITING TO POUNCE ON MO TORISTS WHO CROSS A WHITE LINE . $ THE FIRST THING IS TO GO AND HAVE IT OUT WITH HIM ... $ THESE TYPES ALWAYS BREAK DOWN IF THEY HAVE TO ARGUE IT OUT W ITH A REAL MAN . $ I COULD GIVE HIM A BASHING HE 'D REMEMBER ALL HIS LIFE . $ AND HE WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT BECAUSE OF W HAT WE KNOW ABOUT HIM . $ 01 NO , MIKE , WE CAN'T BEHAVE LIKE BEASTS JUST BECAUSE HE H AS . $ 06 WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO THEN ? $ 02 I STILL THINK WE OUGHT TO PUT IT IN THE HANDS OF THE AUTH ORITIES . $ 01 NO , JIM , I COULDN'T BEAR THE THOUGHT OF US ALL TRAIPSIN G THROUGH THE WITNESS BOX . $ IT GIVES ME TOO MUCH PAIN EVEN TO DISCUSS IT AMONG OUR NEARE ST AND DEAREST . $ I COULDN'T GO THROUGH THE WHOLE THING AGAIN IN PUBLIC . $ 06 WELL , IN THE EYES OF THE LAW NICK 'S THE INNOCENT PARTY . $ IT 'D BE A CLEAR-CUT CASE . $ HE 'S A MINOR . $ 03 WOULD I HAVE TO GIVE EVIDENCE ? $ I 'D FAINT AWAY IF ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE STARTED BADGERING ME . $ 01 INNOCENT OR NOT , IT WOULDN'T PUT US IN A VERY FAVOURABLE LIGHT . $ I MEAN , WE KNOW WE 'VE DONE RIGHT ; WE 'VE DONE OUR BEST BY HIM , BUT OTHER PEOPLE AREN'T VERY CHARITABLE , YOU KNOW . $ 02 WELL , I SHALL HAVE TO GO UP AND SEE HIM THEN . $ 06 I 'LL COME WITH YOU . $ THEY CAN GET VERY NASTY . $ 01 < ( HAND GESTURE OF TRAFFIC POLICEMAN ON POINT DUTY ) > $ NO , MIKE . $ WE APPRECIATE YOUR COMING FORWARD , BUT THIS IS A JOB FOR NI CK'S FATHER . $ WE MUST TREAD WARILY , AND IF YOU WERE THERE YOU MIGHT FORGE T YOURSELF BECAUSE OF HOW STRONGLY YOU FEEL , AND DO SOMETHI NG WE MIGHT ALL REGRET LATER . $ I 'D DO IT MYSELF ... WILLINGLY , BUT IT 'S NOT A WOMAN'S JO B . $ THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS COMFORT LYNN AFTER THE ORDEAL S HE 'S BEEN THROUGH . $ TAKE HER OUT AND GIVE HER A BRANDY OR TWO . $ 03 I CAN'T GO OUT , NOT LIKE THIS ... $ IF I HAVE ANYTHING TO DRINK I SHALL CRY . $ 06 < ( FIRMLY ) > $ NOT WITH ME IN PUBLIC YOU WON'T . $ COME ON , GET SOME CLOTHES ON , REPAIR THE RAVAGES . $ 03 I SHAN'T ENJOY MYSELF . $ 06 WELL , YOU COULD HARDLY BE EXPECTED TO AFTER A THING LIKE THIS HAS HIT YOU . $ BUT LIFE GOES ON . $ WE SHAN'T SAY ANOTHER WORD ABOUT IT . $ WE 'VE GOT TOO MANY PROBLEMS OF OUR OWN TO SORT OUT ... $ 03 WELL , PERHAPS I HAVE GOT THINGS A BIT OUT OF PROPORTION . $ AS LONG AS IT DOESN'T REBOUND ON THE BUSINESS , MIKE , IT 'S A SERIOUS MATTER . $ 06 YOU 'LL PROBABLY GET MORE CUSTOMERS NOW THAN YOU 'VE EVER HAD BEFORE . $ 03 < ( GOING OUT ) > $ TODAY 'S PUT LINES ON MY FACE THAT 'LL BE THERE FOR A LIFETI ME . $ 02 < ( TENTATIVELY ) > $ DID YOU WANT ME TO GO UP THERE TONIGHT OR SHALL WE SLEEP ON IT ? $ 01 SLEEP ? $ IF I SWALLOWED A MONTH'S PRESCRIPTION I SHOULDN'T CLOSE AN E YE ... $ WE CAN'T LET NICK GO TO SCHOOL TILL THAT CALDECOTT 'S BEEN T OLD WHAT HAS COME TO LIGHT . $ YOU MUST GO THERE NOW . $ 02 WELL , I CAN'T GO LIKE THIS . $ 01 NO , YOU CERTAINLY CAN'T . $ A CLEAN SHIRT AND YOUR BLACK PINSTRIPES . $ GO AND PUT THEM ON AT ONCE . $ 02 HE MIGHT NOT BE THERE . $ 01 < ( TARTLY ) > $ THEN YOU 'LL HAVE TO WAIT TILL HE COMES BACK , WON'T YOU ? $ < ( HE GOES , RELUCTANTLY . ) > $ YOU MUST BE KIND TO LYNN , MIKE , SHE 'S A VERY SENSITIVE GI RL . $ I 'M AFRAID THIS WHOLE BUSINESS HAS HIT HER VERY HARD ... $ SHE 'S ALL I 'VE GOT LEFT NOW ... $ I 'M THANKFUL YOU TOOK THE ATTITUDE YOU DID . $ 06 ANY DECENT BLOKE WOULD HAVE DONE THE SAME . $ BUT WE SHALL HAVE TO RECONSIDER THE KIND OF WEDDING WE 'RE G OING TO HAVE . $ I SHOULD FEEL A HYPOCRITE IF I TRIED TO PRETEND THAT NOTHING HAD HAPPENED . $ WE REALLY OUGHT TO GET MARRIED AS QUIETLY AS POSSIBLE . $ 01 O DON'T LET HIM RUIN YOUR WEDDING ON TOP OF EVERYTHING EL SE . $ 06 IT 'S NO BUSINESS OF MINE , BUT THAT BOY 'S NEEDED SOME S ENSE KNOCKING INTO HIM FOR A LONG TIME . $ I 'VE BEEN NOTICING HOW WILD HE IS . $ YOU CAN'T TALK TO HIM WITHOUT HIM QUARRELLING WITH EVERYTHIN G YOU SAY . $ AND YOU KNOW WHY THAT IS . $ ALL THOSE ADVANCED LEVELS . $ HE WANTS TO REACH ADVANCED LEVEL IN EVERYDAY LIVING . $ HIGHER EDUCATION - ALL IT DOES IS MAKE YOU DISCONTENTED AND CYNICAL . $ AND WHAT 'S HE GUNNER DO WITH IT ? $ IT 'S NOT AS IF IT WAS GOING TO GET HIM A HIGH-PAID JOB . $ I CAN UNDERSTAND PEOPLE GOING TO TECH , TO DO SOMETHING USEF UL , BUT WHERE WILL HE END UP ? $ #79 $ 01 < ( VERY FIRM ) > $ NO MIKE , YOU 'RE WRONG . $ EDUCATION IS THE OPEN SESAME TO SUCCESS . $ LOOK MIKE , JIM AND ME , WE 'RE VERY COMFORTABLE WHERE MONEY 'S CONCERNED . $ WE 'VE WORKED EVERY HOUR GOD SENT US , AND MATERIALLY WE WAN T FOR NOTHING . $ BUT FRANKLY , JIM 'S ALWAYS SUFFERED . $ HE 'S ALWAYS FELT INFERIOR AND HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO MIX . $ WHEN I WAS IN WILTSHIRE DURING THE WAR , I WAS IN THE THICK OF THE COUNTY SET . $ THEY ACCEPTED ME WITHOUT SO MUCH AS A RAISED EYEBROW . $ I 'VE ALWAYS HAD AN INBORN KNOW-HOW AS FAR AS PEOPLE ARE CON CERNED , BUT JIM ... I DON'T SAY HE HASN'T ACTED ACCORDING T O HIS LIGHTS , BUT AT TIMES HE 'S BEEN A BIT OF A MILLSTONE ROUND MY NECK . $ 06 WELL , ALL I WANT TO DO IS LIVE COMFORTABLE AND LOOK AFTE R MY FAMILY . $ MY KIDS ARE GOING TO HAVE THE BEST OF EVERYTHING , BUT LYNN AND ME , WE SHAN'T PUSH 'EM . $ < ( ENTER LYNN , IMMACULATE . ) > $ 03 I KNOW WHAT I 'D LIKE . $ I COULD JUST DRINK A NICE CUBA LIBRA . $ 06 WE WON'T STAY OUT LONG . $ WE 'LL BE BACK IN TIME TO SEE HOW JIM GOT ON . $ 01 I 'LL HAVE ANOTHER TRY WITH NICHOLAS WHEN JUST THE TWO OF US ARE ON OUR OWN . $ < ( MIKE AND LYNN GO , TALKING ABOUT BUSINESS SUFFERING . ) > $ IT 'S NO GOOD JIM GOING UP THERE ON HIS OWN , HE 'LL PETER O UT AFTER FIVE MINUTES ... I SHALL HAVE TO TAKE NICK AWAY FRO M THAT SCHOOL . $ HE CAN'T POSSIBLY SIT HIS A LEVELS NOW ... $ IT 'D BREAK MY HEART TO SEE HIM IN AN OFFICE , PUSHING A PEN FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE . $ NICK SHOULD HAVE SPOKEN TO US ABOUT IT EARLIER IF ANYTHING W AS GOING ON ... $ < ( SUDDEN VEHEMENCE . ) > $ MEN LIKE THAT , THEY SHOULD HAVE THEIR HANDS CUT OFF SO EVER YBODY KNOWS WHAT THEY 'VE DONE ... $ < ( LYRICAL ) > $ I REMEMBER THAT PARENTS' EVENING , HE SEEMED SO SINCERE ... $ HE SMILED AT ME AND SAID ' MRS PARGETER , YOU 'RE A LUCKY WO MAN , ALTHOUGH I EXPECT HIS TALENT HAS BEEN LARGELY NURTURED BY YOUR INSIGHT AND ENCOURAGEMENT . ' $ IF HE HADN'T BEEN SO COURTEOUS I SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT TWICE A BOUT LETTING NICK GO ROUND THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE ... $ WELL , WE SHAN'T FALL FOR IT A SECOND TIME ... $ AND YET I SHOULD HAVE SENSED IT IF ANYTHING HAD HAPPENED . $ A MOTHER CAN TELL . $ WE KNOW WE 'VE BROUGHT NICK UP RIGHT , ACCORDING TO THE HIGH EST PRINCIPLES , AND WE 'VE ALWAYS BEEN SO CLOSE . $ I MEAN , WE CAN'T BE INTELLECTUAL WITH HIM , I 'D BE THE FIR RST TO ADMIT IT . $ THE HEADMASTER DID SAY NICHOLAS HAD PROGRESSED BY LEAPS AND BOUNDS SINCE MR CALDECOTT HAD BEEN AT THE SCHOOL . $ ... AND THIS IS SUCH A CRUCIAL TIME ... $ THIS COULD MAKE OR BREAK NICK'S CAREER ... $ HE WAS AT CAMBRIDGE AND HE WAS TALKING ABOUT RECOMMENDING NI CHOLAS FOR HIS OLD COLLEGE ... JESUS CHRIST COLLEGE I THINK HE SAID IT WAS ... $ THESE THINGS DEPEND SO MUCH ON INFLUENCE . $ THEY SAY IT 'S NOT WHAT YOU KNOW BUT WHO YOU KNOW , AND MR C ARTWRIGHT DID SAY NICK WAS BRIGHT BUT NOT BRILLIANT ... $ AAH , THERE 'S ONE AVENUE CLOSED FOR EVER . $ BUT THERE IT IS ... $ OF COURSE , IF NOTHING DID HAPPEN WE SHALL LOOK VERY FOOLISH ... $ VERY FOOLISH INDEED . $ ALL WE SHALL HAVE DONE THEN IS RUIN NICK'S CHANCES . $ BUT I SUPPOSE IT 'S BETTER TO BE OVER-SCRUPULOUS THAN TO RIS K YOUNG BOYS' LIVES ... $ PERHAPS WE SHOULD QUESTION THAT CALDECOTT ... MORE DISCREETL Y ... $ NOT CHALLENGE HIM AT ALL , NOT TO BEGIN WITH ANYWAY ... $ THAT I THINK WOULD BE A SERIOUS BLUNDER ... $ < ( FAMILIARITY WITH HER OWN CLICHES GRADUALLY MOLLIFIES AND REASSURES HER . ) > $ PERHAPS WE HAVE BEEN MAKING MOUNTAINS OUT OF MOLEHILLS ... $ AND WHO 'S GOING TO LISTEN TO MRS OOSIT ? $ ... SHE WAS THE ONE WHO PUT IT ABOUT THAT MRS WEEKLEY HAD SM OTHERED THAT POOR LITTLE MITE OF HERS , BUT OF COURSE SHE HA DN'T ; SHE LOVED CHILDREN , SHE USED TO WORK IN A CHILDREN'S HOME ... $ AND WHAT 'S WRONG WITH A BOY GOING TO HIS TEACHER'S FOR SOME EXTRA COACHING ? $ YOUNGSTERS DO STAY OUT LATE NOWADAYS , AND HE WOULDN'T BE A BOY IF HE DIDN'T HAVE A DRINK NOW AND AGAIN . $ AND LYNN 'S NOT THE MOST RELIABLE OF PEOPLE , SHE PROBABLY C AME HOME WITH A GARBLED VERSION ... $ AND HE IS VERY HIGHLY THOUGHT OF ... $ WE CAN SHOW HIM WE ARE NOT BOUND BY PREJUDICE AND CONVENTION ... I SHALL BE VERY CHARMING ... I THINK I SHALL WEAR MY BE IGE ... $ < ( FADE . ) > $ < END OF ACT ONE > $ < ACT TWO > $ < SCENE ONE > $ < ( LARRY'S FLAT IN A LARGE VICTORIAN SHELL . $ CHEAP SELF-CONSTRUCTED BOOK-CASES IN PINE WITH A VENEER OF T HIN WHITE PAINT , UNTIDELY CRAMMED WITH BOOKS . $ HI-FI , PROFUSION OF RECORDS - JAZZ AND FRENCH FOLK SONGS . $ LARGE DIVAN BED , COVERED WITH GARISH INDIAN BLANKETS . $ FLOOR-COVERING THIN CORD CARPET . $ WALLS A MELANGE OF MODERN PRINTS - KLEE , BRAQUE , BACON - A ND POSTCARDS OF FIRST WORLD WAR , OUTDATED MOVIE PIN-UPS , P HOTOGRAPHS OF STREET-SCENES , ETC . $ INSUBSTANTIAL MODERN FURNITURE . $ RECORD OF BESSIE SMITH PLAYING LOUDLY . $ LARRY IS LYING ON THE SOFA , MOUTHING THE WORDS OF THE SONG AND GESTICULATING EXTRAVAGANTLY . $ THERE IS A PILE OF UNMARKED EXERCISE BOOKS ON THE DESK , WIT H THE REMAINS OF A SKETCHY MEAL . $ DOORBELL . $ HE RISES AND OPENS THE DOOR . $ MR AND MRS PARGETER DRESSED IN THEIR BEST . ) > $ 05 < ( NOT RECOGNISING THEM AT FIRST ) > $ O ... $ IF YOU 'RE LOOKING FOR MRS OOSIT , YOU 'LL PROBABLY FIND HER IN THE BINGO HALL . $ 01 MRS OOSIT IS A WOMAN I 'D GO TO GREAT LENGTHS TO AVOID RA THER THAN SEEK OUT . $ I 'M EVELYN PARGETER ... $ 05 < ( PROFUSELY ) > $ I 'M SO SORRY , YOU CAN'T SEE ANYTHING IN THIS HALL ... $ IT 'S QUITE STYGIAN ... $ 01 YES , SHE KEEPS CATS , DOESN'T SHE ? $ 05 PLEASE DO COME IN . $ < ( CONTRAST WITH RELAXED MANNER OF WHEN HE WAS ALONE ; HE I S NOW SUAVE , CHARMING , INGRATIATING . ) > $ THAT WOMAN IS SO MEAN THAT ONE HAS TO GROPE AROUND IN THE PE NUMBRA PROVIDED BY TEN WATT BULBS . $ 01 < ( INDICATING HER HUSBAND SLIGHTLY ) > $ YOU REMEMBER JAMES , DON'T YOU ? $ 05 THIS IS A PLEASANT SURPRISE ... I WAS EXPECTING NICHOLAS . $ 01 HE WON'T BE COMING ... $ HE 'S NONE TOO WELL THIS EVENING . $ YOU 'D NEVER THINK FROM THE OUTSIDE THESE ROOMS COULD BE SO SPACIOUS ... $ MUST HAVE BEEN MONEYED PEOPLE LIVE HERE AT ONE TIME OF DAY . .. $ IT 'S SUCH A SHABBY STREET NOW , ISN'T IT ? $ 05 I 'M AFRAID IT 'S VERY UNTIDY AT THE MOMENT . $ I 'M MARKING BOOKS . $ < ( APOLOGETIC GESTURE . ) > $ ... SIT DOWN IF YOU CAN FIND ROOM , JUST THROW THE BOOKS ON THE FLOOR . $ 01 BOOKS ARE TOO SACRED TO ME TO EVER PUT THEM ON THE FLOOR ... $ < ( SHE CAREFULLY PILES THEM ON THE TABLE . ) > $ NICHOLAS IS RATHER OVERWROUGHT ... $ HE 'S BEEN KEEPING SUCH LATE HOURS . $ 05 THAT 'S ... ER ... MY FAULT RATHER , I 'M AFRAID . $ BUT KIDS ... THEY NEVER KNOW WHEN TO GO , DO THEY ? $ I DON'T LIKE TO TELL HIM TO GET OUT BECAUSE WITH SOMEONE AS SENSITIVE AS NICK IT MIGHT HURT HIM . $ 02 I EXPECT NOW IT 'S GETTING NEAR THE A LEVELS THEY ALL WAN T TO TAKE UP YOUR SPARE TIME WITH EXTRA COACHING AND ALL THA T . $ 05 YES , IT SEEMS AS IF SOME OF HIS CROWD ARE ALWAYS HERE .. . $ UNFORTUNATELY , IT ISN'T ALWAYS SUCH A PLEASURE TALKING TO T HEM AS IT IS WITH NICK ... $ I RECKON I LEARN AS MUCH FROM HIM AS HE DOES FROM ME . $ 01 I EXPECT HE PULLS US TO PIECES , DOESN'T HE ? $ 05 OH NO . $ HE 'S VERY LOYAL . $ HE DOES APPRECIATE ALL YOU 'VE DONE . $ HE 'S A VERY SERIOUS AND THOUGHTFUL BOY . $ < ( TURNS TO EVELYN . ) > $ I CAN TELL YOU FROM HIS WRITING , ESPECIALLY HIS POETRY , SO ME OF THE THINGS HE WRITES ABOUT ... $ A BOY OF THAT AGE CAN'T POSSIBLY HAVE EXPERIENCED SUCH A WID E RANGE OF FEELING . $ I CAN TELL AT A GLANCE THAT IT 'S YOU AND YOUR EXPERIENCE OF THE WORLD TALKING THROUGH HIM ... $ 01 POETRY 'S ALWAYS BEEN A FAVOURITE WITH ME , IT 'S BEEN SU CH A COMFORT TO ME IN TIMES OF TROUBLE - AND I 'VE SEEN PLEN TY OF THAT , BELIEVE YOU ME ... $ < ( SOULFUL ) > $ - DOES THE ROAD WIND UPHILL ALL THE WAY ? $ - YES , TO THE VERY END . $ - WILL THE JOURNEY TAKE THE LIVELONG DAY ? $ - FROM MORN TILL NIGHT MY FRIEND . $ < ( MOMENT OF REVERIE . $ RECOLLECTING HERSELF ABRUPTLY . ) > $ BUT NEVER MIND ALL THAT NOW , WE 'VE COME HERE SPECIALLY TO TALK OVER ONE OR TWO THINGS WITH YOU THAT HAVE EMERGED . $ 05 < ( SADLY ) > $ I ONLY WISH MORE PARENTS WOULD SHOW THE INTEREST YOU DO . $ 01 WHAT WE REALLY WANT TO KNOW FIRST IS WHAT ARE NICHOLAS'S CHANCES ? $ 05 OH , HE 'LL WALK THROUGH HIS A LEVELS , I SHALL BE VERY M UCH SURPRISED IF HE DOESN'T GET A DISTINCTION . $ 02 HE REALLY IS THAT GOOD IS HE , MR CALDECOTT ? $ 05 AS FAR AS ENGLISH GOES THERE 'S NO QUESTION . $ 01 I SEE ... $ YOU REALLY DID RAISE OUR HOPES YOU KNOW WHEN YOU MENTIONED C AMBRIDGE . $ AND WE 'VE GOT SO USED TO THE IDEA THAT I DON'T THINK WE COU LD BEAR TO BE DISAPPOINTED ... $ HOW REALISTIC AN AMBITION IS IT ? $ 05 WELL ... AS FAR AS SCHOLARSHIPS GO , I DON'T THINK HE 'LL MAKE IT . $ BUT HE IS COMMON ENTRANCE MATERIAL . $ 01 COMMON ENTRANCE ? $ ISN'T THAT A BIT INFERIOR ? $ 05 HEAVENS NO . $ IT SIMPLY MEANS HIS GRANT WOULD COME FROM THE LOCAL AUTHORIT Y RATHER THAN THE COLLEGE ... $ < ( ASSESSING THE SITUATION . ) > $ #80 $ NICK IS IN A VERY FAVOURABLE POSITION , AND MY OLD TUTOR IS ON THE SELECTION BOARD . $ THAT , COMBINED WITH THE FACT THAT NICK PERFORMS EXTREMELY W ELL IN AN INTERVIEW SITUATION , SHOULD GUARANTEE HIM A PLACE . $ 01 I SEE ... $ RECOMMENDATION PLAYS A BIG PART IN IT THEN , DOES IT ? $ 05 I KNOW IT SHOULDN'T BE , BUT THAT 'S THE WAY THINGS STILL HAPPEN ... $ AND ANYBODY WHO REFUSED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE LOOPHOLES I N THE SYSTEM IF HE WERE IN A POSITION TO DO SO , WOULD BE AN IMPOSSIBLE IDEALIST . $ 02 < ( VESTIGES OF EARLIER ATTITUDE RE-ASSERTING THEMSELVES AGGRESSIVE ) > $ LOOK , MR CALDECOTT , IF YOU CAN DO ALL THAT , WHY DOES OUR NICK HAVE TO COME ROUND HERE THREE NIGHTS A WEEK TILL ONE O' CLOCK IN THE MORNING ? $ 01 < ( CRUSHINGLY ) > $ HE HASN'T UNDERSTOOD ... $ < ( TO JIM , LOUDLY . ) > $ THEY 'VE STILL GOT TO BE UP TO THE MARK ACADEMICALLY , JAMES , AS WELL AS HAVE THEIR TEACHER'S BACKING ... $ WE 'RE VERY GRATEFUL FOR THE PERSONAL INTEREST YOU 'VE TAKEN ... I MEAN , WE CAN TAKE CARE AND LOOK AFTER HIM , BUT WE C ANNOT COPE WITH THE INTELLECTUAL SIDE OF HIM ... $ WE HAVE TO LEAVE THAT TO YOU , MR CALDECOTT . $ 05 OH , I THINK MY CONTRIBUTION IS VERY MODEST . $ 01 < ( TRAFFIC POLICEMAN GESTURE ) > $ MR CALDECOTT , YOU OPEN DOORS FOR HIM THAT I WOULD HAVE GIVE N MY RIGHT ARM TO HAVE HAD OPENED FOR ME WHEN I WAS HIS AGE . $ I MEAN , I 'M NOT A DIMWIT BY ANY MANNER OF MEANS , I READ , I DEVOUR EVERYTHING I CAN LAY MY HANDS ON IN THE TRAVEL AND BIOGRAPHY LINE ... $ BUT I SIMPLY CAN'T RISE TO YOUR HEIGHTS ... $ AND I KNOW JIM WOULD BE JUST THE SAME IF HE HAD THE TIME , W OULDN'T YOU , JIM ? $ < ( DOESN'T WAIT FOR AN ANSWER . ) > $ SO YOU SEE , WE REALISE WHY NICHOLAS IS SUCH A FREQUENT VISI TOR HERE , AND WE 'RE FULLY IN AGREEMENT WITH IT . $ WE 'RE PEOPLE , MR CALDECOTT , WHO 'VE ALWAYS BEEN AHEAD OF OUR TIME , AND SOME MIGHT SAY WE WERE UNCONVENTIONAL . $ < ( PARENTHETICALLY ) > $ - AND PERHAPS THAT 'S NO BAD THING WITH ENVY AND GREED BAYIN G AT OUR HEELS AND TRYING TO BRING EVERYONE DOWN TO THE SAME GREY LEVEL - $ 05 YES , I THINK THE MORE DISSENT THERE IS IN A SOCIETY LIKE OURS THE BETTER ... $ 01 NO , LET ME FINISH . $ WE 'RE UNCONVENTIONAL , BUT WE LIVE AMONG PEOPLE WHO , BY AN D LARGE , ARE NOT ... $ MRS OOSIT FOR INSTANCE , WITH WHOM I 'VE HAD THE MISFORTUNE TO BE DISTANTLY ACQUAINTED FOR MANY YEARS , WOULD TAKE QUITE A DIFFERENT VIEW ... $ THERE 'S NO LIMIT TO THE HARM THAT A THOUGHTLESS PIECE OF MA LICIOUS GOSSIP CAN DO . $ < ( MOMENTARY ANGER , SUBSIDING . ) > $ I 'M SURE A MAN IN YOUR POSITION KNOWS THE IMPORTANCE OF AN UNTARNISHED REPUTATION . $ 02 < ( HALTING ) > $ THERE 'S SOME ... CONDUCT THAT 'S ACCEPTABLE ... BUT THERE ' S SOME ... THAT 'S ... THAT 'S ... $ < ( WEAKLY ) > $ NOT ACCEPTABLE . $ 01 DON'T TAKE ANY NOTICE OF HIM , MR CALDECOTT . $ SOMETIMES HE HAS A VERY UNFORTUNATE MANNER . $ PEOPLE THINK HE 'S BEING HOSTILE WHEN HE 'S NOT REALLY . $ < ( NERVOUSLY . ) > $ EVEN SHOPKEEPERS SOMETIMES , HE APPEARS QUITE RUDE , I HAVE TO GO ROUND AFTER HIM SMOOTHING THINGS OUT . $ 05 NATURALLY . $ PARENTS WHO ARE ANXIOUS AS YOU ARE TO SEE THAT YOUR SON DEVE LOPS HIS ABILITIES TO THE FULL , ARE CONCERNED ABOUT THE KIN D OF PEOPLE INTO WHOSE CLUTCHES HE MIGHT FALL . $ 01 < ( RITUAL PROTEST ) > $ O WE DIDN'T MEAN TO SUGGEST ANYTHING UNTOWARD ... $ 05 < ( BREAKS IN ) > $ YOU WANT TO REASSURE YOURSELVES OF MY DISINTERESTEDNESS . $ < ( FALSE HUMILITY , PATHOS , PLAYACTING , RESPONDING TO THE COVER DIALOGUE THAT HAS TAKEN PLACE BEYOND THEIR WORDS . ) > $ IN MANY WAYS , MRS PARGETER ... I AM WHAT SOME MIGHT CALL A SAD AND DISAPPOINTED MAN ... $ I STARTED OUT WWITH THE HIGHEST AMBITIONS - NEARLY TEN YEARS AGO NOW - I REALLY IMAGINED THAT , ALTHOUGH OF HUMBLE BACKG ROUND , THE TALENTS I POSSESSED WOULD ENSURE ME MY RIGHTFUL PLACE AT THE TOP OF THE SOCIAL PYRAMID . $ BUT IT WAS NOT TO BE . $ < ( BREAKS OFF ) > $ - DO YOU KNOW I DON'T KNOW WHY I 'M TALKING TO YOU LIKE THIS , BUT I FEEL YOU ARE A WOMAN WHO HAS SUFFERED , FOR WHOM LI FE HAS BEEN A CONSTANT STRUGGLE , AND WHO WILL INTUITIVELY U NDERSTAND ... $ THE REALISATION THAT ONE'S TALENTS ARE REALLY OF A VERY MEDI OCRE ORDER IS A PAINFUL PROCESS , BUT I THINK I 'VE ACCEPTED IT NOW ... $ MY PERSONAL LIFE TOO HAS BEEN DOGGED BY MISFORTUNE ... $ MY FIANCEE - THAT 'S HER PICTURE UP THERE $ < ( EYES FOLLOW HIS TO A LARGE GLOSSY PICTURE OF A HORSY GIR L ) > $ WAS KICKED TO DEATH BY HER OWN HORSE , NIMROD , AT THE WOODB RIDGE AND DISTRICT GYMKHANA DURING A GRAND DISPLAY OF DRESSA GE AT WHICH SHE WAS THE PRINCIPAL PERFORMER ... $ AND I HAD TO STAND BY AND WATCH IT HAPPEN ... $ PERHAPS IT 'S MORBID TO LIVE WITH THE PICTURE OF A DEAD WOMA N AS THE CENTREPIECE OF ONE'S ROOM ... $ 01 < ( MOVED ) > $ WHAT A TERRIBLE TRAGEDY . $ 05 OUT OF ALL THIS SHAMBLES THE ONLY CRUMB OF COMFORT I HAVE IS THE MODEST JOY OF HELPING THOSE WHO I RECOGNISE TO BE MO RE BRILLIANT BY FAR THAN MYSELF . $ < ( PAUSE . ) > $ AM I TO UNDERSTAND , MRS PARGETER , THAT YOU WISH TO WRENCH THIS CONSOLATION FROM ME ? $ 01 MR CALDECOTT , I WILL BE AS HONEST WITH YOU AS YOU HAVE B EEN WITH ME . $ I WILL ADMIT THAT FOR A TIME I WAS A LITTLE DISTURBED . $ BUT NOW I CAN SEE THE WHOLE THING IN ITS TRUE LIGHT I AM ASH AMED THAT I COULD EVEN HAVE LISTENED TO THE SLANDERS OF MRS OOSIT , A WOMAN KNOWN FOR A GOSSIP AND A MARRIAGE BREAKER . $ < ( LARRY LOOKS AT HER QUESTIONINGLY . ) > $ HER BACKBITING SPARES NO ONE , HOWEVER IRREPROACHABLE THEIR CONDUCT . $ 02 WE CAN REST ASSURED , THEN , THAT YOU WON'T HAVE ANY TROU BLE IN GETTING HIM INTO CAMBRIDGE ? $ 01 MR CALDECOTT WILL DO HIS LEVEL BEST , JIM , HE DOESN'T HA VE TO BE TOLD . $ 05 I TAKE IT YOU HAVE NO OBJECTION IF NICHOLAS CONTINUES TO COME FOR HIS TUITION ? $ HE 'S MAKING RATHER HEAVY WEATHER OF THE ANATOMY OF MELANCHO LY . $ 01 OH , IT SOUNDS THE TEENIEST BIT MORBID . $ 05 IT IS A SET BOOK , MRS PARGETER . $ 01 OH WELL , IF IT 'S SET , THAT 'S DIFFERENT . $ OF COURSE HE MUST CONTINUE . $ IT 'LL ACT AS A ... GUARANTEE FOR HIS SUCCESS , WON'T IT ? $ WE SHALL BE DELIGHTED TO KNOW HE 'S IN SAFE HANDS . $ 05 MY DEAR MRS PARGETER , WHILE HE IS HERE , YOU HAVE MY ASS URANCE HE WILL BE IN THE COMPANY OF THE WORLD'S GREATEST MIN DS . $ I REFER , NOT OF COURSE TO MY OWN , BUT THE COMPANY OF THOSE WRITERS AND POETS WHO ARE OUR HERITAGE AND WHO SPEAK TO US ACROSS THE CENTURIES THEIR AGELESS WISDOM . $ 01 YES , IT 'S BETTER THAN ROAMING THE STREETS AND GETTING I N WITH A DUBIOUS CROWD . $ 05 HOWEVER GREAT A POWER FOR GOOD THE HOME MAY BE , ADOLESCE NTS FALL A READY PREY TO NEFARIOUS INFLUENCES . $ 01 HOW WELL YOU UNDERSTAND ME , MR CALDECOTT ... $ TELL ME , IS YOUR OWN MOTHER STILL ... WITH US ? $ 05 SHE HAS BEEN SPARED , YES . $ I HAVE ENTREATED HER TO COME AND LIVE WITH ME , BUT SHE STEA DFASTLY REFUSESS TO LEAVE HER TERRACED HOME IN COBBLETHWAITE BRIDGE - THE PENNIES YOU KNOW $ < ( EVELYN NODS ' OF COURSE ' ) > $ - IN THE SHADOW OF THE PIT WHICH CLAIMED MY FATHER IN THE GR EAT DISASTER OF 1946 . $ SHE SAYS ' NO , I WANT TO BE NEAR JOSIAH - THAT WAS HIS NAME ' , ALTHOUGH HE DIED A QUARTER OF A CENTURY AGO . $ 02 I CAN SEE WHERE YOU GET YOUR PESSIMISM FROM . $ 01 NOT PESSIMISM , JAMES . $ SENSITIVITY . $ MR CALDECOTT , YOUR MOTHER SOUNDS A REMARKABLE WOMAN . $ IF I WERE TO MEET HER , I KNOW I SHOULD WARM TO HER INSTINCT IVELY . $ CLASS DISTINCTIONS ARE , YOU SEE , FOR ME , PARAPHERNALIA WE SHOULD DO WELL TO RID OURSELVES OF ... $ < ( SHE BEGINS TO GATHER UP HER BAG AND GLOVES . ) > $ 05 MUST YOU GO ? $ ... ONLY , I 'D LIKE TO TALK TO YOU NOW I 'VE BEGUN TO DISBU RDEN MYSELF ... $ THINGS I 'VE BOTTLED UP FOR YEARS I FIND I CAN SUDDENLY COMM UNICATE TO YOU . $ WON'T YOU STAY A LITTLE ? $ 01 THERE WILL BE OPPORTUNITIES , MR CALDECOTT , FOR MANY A C HINWAG BETWEEN YOU AND I ... $ I HOPE YOU WILL COME TO DINNER WITH US - IN THE EVENING OF C OURSE - AT AN EARLY DATE OF YOUR OWN CHOOSING . $ 05 I SHALL BE HONOURED . $ 02 HOW MUCH WILL THE LESSONS COST , MR CALDECOTT ? $ WE 'VE ALWAYS BEEN STICKLERS FOR PAYING OUR WAY . $ 01 JAMES , YOU INSULT MR CALDECOTT . $ CAN YOU REALLY HAVE UNDERSTAND SO LITTLE OF WHAT HE HAS BEEN TRYING TO SAY TO US ? $ IT 'LL BE A LABOUR OF LOVE , JAMES . $ THERE 'S NO NEED FOR COMMERCE TO RAISE ITS UGLY HEAD . $ 02 WELL I DON'T LIKE NICK DRINKING . $ 01 NO . $ I 'M NONE TOO HAPPY ABOUT THAT MYSELF . $ YOU DON'T MIND MY MENTIONING IT ? $ 05 I 'M GLAD YOU DID . $ 01 COME ALONG , JIM , WE MUST GO AND INFORM THE FAMILY OF WH AT HAS TRANSPIRED . $ I 'M SURE THEY 'LL SHARE OUR DELIGHT IN EVERY WAY ... $ GOOD EVENING , MR CALDECOTT . $ WE APOLOGISE IF WE 'VE INTRUDED INTO THE GROVES OF ACADEME , EVEN IF IT IS IN CLISSOLD STREET . $ < ( WAN SMILE . ) > $ WOULD YOU MIND KEEPING THE DOOR OPEN TILL WE 'VE GOT DOWNSTA IRS . $ I DON'T RELISH THE THOUGHT OF BREAKING AN ANKLE ON MRS OOSIT 'S STAIRS ... $ < ( THEY GO . $ LARRY LEAVES THE DOOR OPEN UNTIL THEY HAVE DISAPPEARED . $ #81 $ TURNS UP THE RECORD OF BESSIE SMITH VERY LOUD . $ FLINGS HIMSELF ON THE SOFA . ) > $ < ( FADE . ) > $ < ACT TWO > $ < SCENE TWO ) > $ < ( LATE EVENING . $ NICHOLAS IS ASLEEP ON THE SOFA IN HIS OUTDOOR CLOTHES . $ A HOLDALL BESIDE HIM , AN EMPTY GLASS ON THE TABLE AND A NOT E . $ EVELYN AND JIM COME IN . $ HER VOICE IS HEARD BEFORE SHE ENTERS . ) > $ 01 JIM , THERE 'S SOME DOG-DROPPINGS ON THE PAVEMENT , RIGHT OUTSIDE THE GATE , GET THE DUST-PAN AND CLEAR IT UP , WILL YOU . $ PEOPLE WITH DOGS , YOU NEVER SEE THEM STOP OUTSIDE THEIR OWN HOUSE AND LET IT DO ITS BUSINESS ... $ ALTHOUGH PETS ARE IMPORTANT TO FAMILY LIFE , I DO THINK THEY OUGHT TO DRAW THE LINE AT DOGS IN BUILT-UP AREAS . $ 02 'S NO ACCIDENT , EV . $ I THINK A CERTAIN PERSON ENCOURAGES HER DOG TO DO IT ON PURP OSE . $ 01 THERE 'S SOME SMALL PEOPLE LIVE AROUND HERE . $ SOME VERY SMALL PEOPLE . $ < ( SHE NOTICES NICHOLAS . ) > $ NICHOLAS ... ? $ WHAT 'S HE DOING LAYING THERE LIKE THAT , HIS DIRTY FEET ALL OVER MY BROCADE ? $ ... NICHOLAS ... ? $ < ( SHE GOES TOWARDS HIM ; SEES THE NOTE AND PICKS IT UP . ) > $ WHAT 'S THIS ? $ < ( READS . ) > $ ' DEAR MUM AND DAD , I HAVE RUN AWAY - ' $ RUN AWAY ? $ WHAT DOES HE MEAN , RUN AWAY , LAYING HERE ON THE SOFA ? $ < ( SUDDEN SCREAM . ) > $ JIM , HE 'S TAKEN SOMETHING ... $ HE 'S IN A COMA ... $ WAKE HIM ... $ < ( SHE SHAKES HIM . ) > $ < ( HE WAKES UP . ) > $ 04 < ( SLEEPY ; DISORIENTED ) > $ OH , HELLO , MUM . $ 01 < ( RELIEF ; ANGER ) > $ OOF , I SHALL HAVE TO SIT DOWN ... $ YOU CAN MAKE A MOTHER'S HAIR GO WHITE OVERNIGHT , SHOCKS LIK E THAT ... $ < ( CLUTCHES FOREHEAD . ) > $ TO COME IN AND FIND YOU LAYING THERE WITH YOUR MOUTH OPEN .. . $ I THOUGHT WE HAD A SUICIDE ON OUR HANDS . $ YOU CALLOUS LITTLE HOUND . $ THE LENGTHS I 'VE BEEN TO ON YOUR BEHALF TONIGHT . $ 04 I MUST 'VE FELL ASLEEP . $ 01 WHAT 'S ALL THIS RIGMAROLE ABOUT RUNNING AWAY ? $ 04 I WAS GOING TO LEAVE HOME . $ 'COS I WAS FED UP . $ I WAS GOING ON A TREK . $ OVERLAND TO INDIA . $ KATMANDU . $ 02 KATMANDU . $ KATMAN BLOODY MIGHT , BUT IT 'S MORE THAN YOU WOULD IN A MON TH OF SUNDAYS . $ 01 DON'T GOAD HIM , JIM . $ HE 'S CONTRARY ENOUGH TO DO IT , JUST FOR THE PLEASURE OF PU TTING US UP A GUM TREE . $ 02 ONLY COWARDS RUN AWAY , SON . $ 01 ONLY COWARDS SHOW THE WHITE FEATHER . $ 04 I 'VE GOT IT ALL WORKED OUT ... I SAT DOWN TO THINK UP A LETTER , BUT I FELL ASLEEP . $ FUNNY , I CAN WRITE STORIES , BUT I CAN NEVER THINK WHAT TO PUT IN LETTERS ... $ ANYWAY I 'M GOING TO LEAVE SCHOOL , AND I 'M NOT GOING TO TR Y FOR UNIVERSITY . $ < ( EXPLAINING ; INTENSE . ) > $ I 'VE GOT TO COME TO TERMS WITH MYSELF , MUM , YOU CAN'T DO THAT IN THE RAREFIED ATMOSPHERE OF A UNIVERSITY - I 'VE GOT TO BE WHAT I AM , MUM , AND I 'VE GOT TO LIVE IT . $ I 'VE GOT TO PUSH IT TO ITS LOGICAL CONCLUSION . $ A HUMAN BEING HAS A DUTY TO HIMSELF TO BE WHAT HE IS . $ NOT TO BE ONE OF THE GREY ONES - $ 01 GREY ONES , WHAT DOES HE MEAN , GREY ONES ? $ 02 I THINK HE MEANS US , EV . $ 01 GREY ONES , DON'T TALK HALF SHARP , NICHOLAS . $ WE 'RE THE BACKBONE OF THE NATION . $ SOCIETY 'D BE IN A SORRY PICKLE WITHOUT US . $ OF COURSE YOU 'LL GO TO UNIVERSITY , NICHOLAS . $ WHERE ELSE WILL YOU GET YOUR SOCIAL GROOMING AND POLISH . $ YOU 'LL NEVER MAKE MORE THAN A ... MINNOW IN A MILL-POND . $ GOODNESS KNOWS , IT 'S BEEN BAD ENOUGH SEEING YOU DRAGGED DO WN TO THE LEVEL OF THE COMMON HERD IN THAT SCHOOL . $ YOU 'LL GO TO CAMBRIDGE , IF I HAVE TO GO WITH YOU . $ 04 I AM NOT GOING TO ANY UNIVERSITY PRODUCTION LINE . $ 01 I 'VE SUNG SMALL AND ATE HUMBLE PIE FOR YOU . $ I 'VE SUBMITTED MYSELF TO ALL SORTS OF HUMILIATIONS , YOUR F ATHER AS WELL , AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS SCOFF , SCOFF , SCOFF . $ 02 LET HIM HAVE HIS WAY , EV . $ LET HIM DO AS HE LIKES . $ AND THEN, WHEN HE 'S SWEEPING THE ROADS , LET HIM COME CRAWL ING BACK TO US WITH HIS TAIL BETWEEN HIS LEGS AND WATCH US S LAM THE DOOR IN HIS FACE . $ 01 DON'T MAKE YOURSELF MORE OF A NUMBSKULL THAN YOU ARE , JI M . $ HE 'S BROKEN HIS MOTHER'S HEART ... I SHAN'T SURVIVE SUCH WO RDS FOR LONG ... $ YOU 'VE LAID WASTE MY LIFE ... $ MY HOPES AND DREAMS ARE IN RUINS . $ 04 < ( EXASPERATED ; MILDNESS ) > $ LISTEN , MUM ... $ LET ME JUST TALK TO YOU ... $ I WANT TO MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND HOW I FEEL . $ 01 YOU DON'T FEEL ANYTHING . $ THERE 'S NO LOVE IN YOU , NICHOLAS . $ < ( SURVEYING HIM TRAGICALLY . ) > $ GOD HELP THE GIRL YOU MARRY . $ I ONLY HOPE AND PRAY SHE 'S AS HARD-HEARTED AS YOU ARE ARE , BECAUSE IF SHE ISN'T SHE 'LL SUP SORROW BY SPOONFULS . $ 04 LISTEN . $ YOU NEVER LISTEN , MUM , THERE 'S NO COMMUNICATION . $ 01 LISTEN TO YOU , I DON'T NEED TO , I KNOW YOU THROUGH AND THROUGH . $ 04 < ( SHOUTS ) > $ LISTEN . $ I 'LL TELL YOU WHY I 'M NOT GOING TO UNIVERSITY . $ I 'D RATHER GO OUT INTO THE REAL WORLD , EVEN IF IT 'S ONLY LABOURING ON A BUILDING SITE . $ 02 BUILDING SITE , YOU 'D FALL AND BREAK YOUR NECK FIRST DAY . $ 01 YOU GET THE LOWEST OF THE LOW IN THOSE PLACES . $ IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT ? $ TO DEMEAN YOURSELF , AND US WITH YOU ? $ 04 I DIDN'T SAY I WAS GOING TO WORK ON A BUILDING SITE , I J UST GAVE IT AS AN EXAMPLE . $ I WANT TO WORK MY WAY UP , BY MY OWN TALENTS . $ 01 YES , YES , VERY PRAISEWORTHY , NICHOLAS , I 'M A BIG BEL IEVER IN PEOPLE STANDING ON THEIR OWN FEET . $ I DID IT ; YOUR FATHER HAD TO . $ BUT IT 'S DIFFERENT FOR YOU . $ GOD HAS GIVEN YOU SPECIAL TALENTS , AND YOU 'VE GOT A DUTY T O US AND TO HIM TO USE THEM PROPERLY , NOT BURY THEM , LIKE IN THE PARABLE . $ WHAT WILL YOU SAY YOU 'VE DONE WITH YOUR TALENTS AT THE END OF THE DAY ? $ YOU 'LL BE SOME TIMID CHEESE-COUNTER ASSISTANT , BOWING AND SCRAPING , WHO DAREN'T SAY BOO TO A GOOSE . $ 04 < ( WEARY OUTBURST ) > $ OH CHRIST , WHAT 'S THE USE ? $ DAD , YOU TELL HER . $ HOW CAN YOU REALLY KNOW WHAT YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO IF YOU NEVER PUT YOURSELF TO THE TEST ? $ I 'M GOING TO GET A JOB , GET A FLAT AND LIVE ON MY OWN . $ 01 FLATS , BOYS OF SEVENTEEN IN FLATS , I 'VE NEVER HEARD OF ANYTHING SO HALF-BAKED . $ WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO IN FLATS THAT YOU CAN'T DO AT HOME ? $ 04 I DON'T KNOW TILL I GET ONE ... $ < ( SORROWING AND PATIENT . ) > $ YOU OUTGROW YOUR FAMILY , MUM . $ YOU WANT TO STRIKE OUT ON YOUR OWN , FORM NEW RELATIONSHIPS . $ 01 NICHOLAS , NO YOUNG PERSON EVER LEAVES THEIR PARENTS' HOU SE , EXCEPT FOR ONE REASON , AND THAT 'S TO GET MARRIED . $ LIKE LYNN 'S GOING TO ... $ < ( SERENE AND WISE . ) > $ IT 'S NEVER PUT A DAMPER ON LYNN , LYNN ALWAYS FOUND PLENTY OF SCOPE AT HOME . $ SHE 'S ALWAYS BROUGHT HER BOY-FRIENDS HERE . $ AND WHEN SHE DECIDED TO MAKE A GO OF IT WITH MIKE , THEY HAD THAT FRONT ROOM TO THEMSELVES ... $ ADMITTEDLY WE 'VE TURNED A BLIND EYE ... I KNOW THEY 'VE ... GONE FURTHER THAN I EVER WOULD AT THEIR AGE - AND LET ME TE LL YOU , I WOULD HAVE HAD MORE EXCUSE , JIM WAS ONLY HOME ON WHIRLWIND LEAVES , EVERY TIME WE PARTED I NEVER KNEW IF IT WAS GOING TO BE FOR EVER ... $ BUT LYNN 'S LOOKED BETTER FOR IT , SHE 'S GOT A BLOOM IN HER CHEEKS , SHE 'LL MAKE A LOVELY BRIDE ... $ SO DON'T TRY AND PUSH FLATS DOWN MY THROAT , YOU CAN BRING Y OUR GIRL-FRIENDS HERE AND DO YOUR COURTING PROPERLY . $ 02 AND NOT SO MUCH OF OUTGROWING YOUR FAMILY . $ I NEVER OUTGREW MY FATHER . $ I WAS LEARNING FROM HIM RIGHT UP TO THE DAY HE DIED . $ 01 RUBBISH , JIM . $ YOUR FATHER WAS A BIGOTED LABOURITE IGNORAMOUS . $ I BELIEVE IN RESPECT FOR THE DEAD , BUT I DON'T BELIEVE IN M AKING SAINTS OUT OF THEM . $ 04 YOU 'VE GOT TO BUILD RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER PEOPLE , OU TSIDE YOUR FAMILY . $ 01 RELATIONSHIPS . $ YOU DON'T THROW THE DUST IN MY EYES . $ I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS . $ IT MEANS SEX AND DRUGS AND ANY OTHER SQUALIDNESS GOING . $ 04 < ( SHOUTS ; EXPLOSIVE ) > $ WELL AT LEAST I 'LL MAKE SURE I KEEP CLEAR OF QUEER SCHOOLTE ACHERS . $ < ( AWFUL SILENCE . ) > $ 02 < ( DOUBT ) > $ I THINK WE 'VE DONE THE WRONG THING , EV ? $ 01 < ( WILD AND DISMISSIVE ) > $ NICHOLAS , THE IMPLICATIONS OF THAT LAST REMARK ESCAPE ME .. . $ < ( STARTS TO TIDY UP THE ROOM AS THOUGH SHE HAD MORE IMPORT ANT PREOCCUPATION . ) > $ 04 < ( BEWILDERED ) > $ I 'M AGREEING WITH WHAT YOU SAID . $ IT WASN'T HEALTHY FOR ME . $ IT WASN'T THE RIGHT KIND OF ATMOSPHERE 'COS I 'M EASILY LED . $ 01 ARE YOU REFERRING TO YOUR VISITS TO MR CALDECOTT FOR COAC HING ? $ 04 YEH , 'COURSE I AM . $ I THINK HE IS A BIT OF A REPRESSED FAIRY . $ 01 I REALLY CAN'T KEEP AU FAIT WITH ALL THIS MODERN JARGON . $ YOU NEED A DICTIONARY TO TALK TO YOUR OWN CHILDREN THESE DAY S . $ 02 HE DIDN'T CONVINCE ME FOR A MINUTE WITH ALL THAT BALONEY . $ THERE WAS SOMETHING SLIMY ABOUT HIM . $ #82 $ 01 THAT KIND OF LOW TALK DOESN'T HELP MATTERS . $ UNLESS YOU HAVE ANYTHING POSITIVE TO CONTRIBUTE , JUST PIPE DOWN . $ < ( CLEARS HER THROAT . ) > $ NICHOLAS , I THINK I OUGHT TO TELL YOU , MR CALDECOTT CONFID ED IN ME . $ HE TOLD ME THINGS HE COULDN'T POSSIBLY DIVULGE TO A YOUNG BO Y ... $ < ( ELEGIAC . ) > $ HE 'S A MAN OF GREAT REFINEMENT . $ 04 UH ? $ 01 I WAS A FOOLISH MOTHER TO TAKE LYNN'S WORD INSTEAD OF YOU RS . $ I WAS NOT DECEIVED IN MY IMPRESSION OF HIM ON PARENTS' DAY . $ HE 'S EVERY INCH A GENTLEMAN , HOWEVER HUMBLE HIS ORIGINS MA Y BE . $ MY OWN WERE NO GREAT SHAKES , BUT I 'VE RISEN ABOVE THEM , J UST AS HE HAS . $ 04 < ( INCREDULOUS ) > $ WHAT DID HE SAY THEN ? $ 01 YOU CAN HARDLY EXPECT ME TO BETRAY ADULT CONFIDENCES TO A SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD YOUTH . $ BUT SUFFICE IT TO SAY THAT LIFE HAS DEALT HIM A CRUEL BLOW . $ THE GIRL HE HAD CHOSEN AS HIS LIFELONG HELPMATE MET HER DEAT H IN TRAGIC CIRCUMSTANCES . $ HE 'S NO MORE ABNORMAL THAN JIM IS . $ 04 < ( TURNS TO JIM FOR CONFIRMATION ) > $ DAD ? $ 02 WELL , SON , YOUR MOTHER UNDERSTANDS PEOPLE IN A WAY I DO N'T . $ SHE LATCHES ON TO THINGS THAT PASS ME BY . $ BUT IF SHE GIVES HIM THE ALL CLEAR , WHO AM I TO SAY ANYTHIN G ONE WAY OR THE OTHER . $ 01 YOUR FATHER MAY BE LESS ASTUTE THAN I AM , NICK , BUT HE GETS THERE IN THE END , AT HIS OWN SNAIL'S PACE . $ 04 WELL I DON'T WANT ANYTHING ELSE TO DO WITH LAURENCE CALDE COTT . $ HE DOESN'T EVEN UNDERSTAND MY WRITING . $ 01 WRITING 'S ALL VERY WELL , BUT IT 'S THE ICING ON THE CAK E . $ THE REAL BRED AND BUTTER IS GETTING INTO CAMBRIDGE , AND UNL ESS YOU WANT TO COME A CROPPER IN YOUR EXAMS YOU 'LL GO TO M R CALDECOTT AS OFTEN AS I SEE FIT TO SEND YOU THERE . $ THAT MR CARTWRIGHT 'S THICK AS THIEVES WITH THAT ROY'S PAREN TS , THEY 'LL KNOCK YOU INTO A COCKED HAT BETWEEN THEM IF YO U DON'T WORK . $ YOU 'LL NEED EVERY MINUTE OF THE TUITION HE CAN SPARE YOU , AND YOU 'LL BE GRATEFUL AND BEHAVE YOURSELF WITH HIM AS YOU ALWAYS HAVE . $ 04 I 'VE TOLD YOU . $ I 'M GETTING A FLAT . $ 01 WHAT WOULD YOU DO IN A FLAT ? $ I KNOW WHAT YOU 'D DO - YOU 'D LIVE ON BAKED BEANS AND BISCU ITS , YOU 'D GET MALNUTRITION IN A FORTNIGHT . $ LIVING IN FLATS IS SORDID , IT 'S NOTHING BUT DAMP BASEMENTS AND DIRTY MILKBOTTLES . $ YOU 'LL STAY ON WHERE YOU ARE , YOU 'RE STILL A MINOR , AND IF WE HAVE ANY PIGGERY-POKERY I 'LL MAKE YOU A WARD OF COURT ... $ YOU 'LL SAIL THROUGH YOUR A LEVELS , AND THEN THE NEXT THING WE KNOW WE 'LL BE BUYING YOU A MORTAR BOARD ... $ THERE 'LL BE TIME FOR THE ARTISTIC SIDE OF THINGS AS WELL , I KNOW , I 'VE GOT ONE ... $ < ( SWEEPING CONCESSION , PERMISSIVE AND MAGNAMINOUS . ) > $ WE SHAN'T EVEN MIND IF YOU GROW YOUR HAIR A BIT LONGER , LON G AS YOU LOOK WHOLESOME AND WELL-GROOMED . $ IN FACT , IT WOULD PROBABLY SUIT YOU QUITE WELL , WHAT DO YO U THINK , JIM . $ < ( JIM LOOKS AS IF HE IS GOING TO SAY SOMETHING ABOUT MALE CAPILLARY STYLES , BUT DOESN'T GET A CHANCE . ) > $ 04 IT 'S NO GOOD GOING ON . $ I 'M GOING TO PACK IT ALL IN . $ I DON'T WANT TO BE PART OF THE RAT-RACE . $ 01 JIM ... $ < ( HISTRIONIC DESOLATION . ) > $ PUT YOUR ARMS AROUND ME ... I CAN'T BEAR IT ... $ 02 NOW LOOK WHAT YOU 'VE DONE TO YOUR MOTHER . $ 01 I HOPE YOU DON'T REPROACH YOURSELF WHEN YOU HAVEN'T GOT M E , I HOPE YOU CAN LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR CRUELT Y , NICHOLAS . $ I 'VE FAILED AS A MOTHER , JAMES . $ ALL IT NEEDS NOW IS FOR YOU TO TELL ME I 'VE FAILED AS A WIF E ... $ I SHALL RETIRE NOW . $ IF I NEVER WAKE AGAIN , IT WILL BE NO GREAT LOSS TO YOU OR M E EITHER . $ < ( SHE GOES ; PAUSES AT THE DOOR AND TURNS . ) > $ AND , NICHOLAS , UNTIL SUCH TIME AS I RECEIVE AN APOLOGY FRO M YOU , CONSIDER YOURSELF MOTHERLESS . $ AS SOON AS YOU AGAIN BECOME THE CHILD I BROUGHT YOU UP TO BE , WE CAN START AGAIN ON OUR OLD FOOTING . $ AND THAT 'LL BE SOON , UNLESS YOU WANT TO SEND ME TO AN EARL Y GRAVE . $ I 'VE LOOKED ON YOU AS THE PROP AND MAINSTAY OF MY DECLINING YEARS . $ BUT NOW I CAN SEE I SHALL HAVE TO TRAVEL THE DOWNHILL JOURNE Y ALONE . $ < ( SHE GOES . $ JIM AND NICK WATCH HER , FASCINATED . $ LONG PAUSE . $ DEPRESSION , ALL SENSE OF RELATIONSHIP COLLAPSES WHEN SHE IS ABSENT . ) > $ 04 I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE WANTS ME TO DO ... $ IT 'S LIKE THE LAST DAYS OF THE CZAR IN THIS HOUSE , SHE 'S ALWAYS SCHEMING AND PLOTTING ... $ EVERY DAY I 'M IN THE MIDDLE OF A DIFFERENT DRAMA . $ SHE 'S DRIVING ME ROUND THE TWIST . $ YOU TRY AND ARGUE WITH HER AND SHE JUST DROWNS YOU IN VERBAL DIARRHOEA . $ SHE CAN'T STOP TALKING 'COS IF SHE DID SHE 'D HEAR EVERYONE LAUGHING AT HER . $ #83 $ 02 NICK , A MOTHER 'S SOMETHING THAT SHOULD INSPIRE REVERENC E . $ 04 WELL SHE DOESN'T . $ 02 < ( SENTENTIOUS ) > $ HIM WHO MOCKS HIS MOTHER WILL NEVER MEET HIS MAKER . $ 04 WELL CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT SHE WANTS ? $ 02 SHE WANTS YOU TO GET ON , SON , SAME AS I DO . $ 04 < ( RISING EMOTION ; FRUSTRATION ) > $ I FEEL LIKE A CIRCUS ANIMAL . $ I JUMP THROUGH THIS HOOP , I JUMP THROUGH THAT HOOP ... $ I WANT TO BE ABLE TO EXIST AS A PERSON , IN MY OWN RIGHT ... $ I WANT TO BE ABLE TO CREATE ... $ SHE FOUND THE BOOK I WAS WRITING , SHE WENT MAD ... $ I 'VE NOT BEEN ABLE TO TOUCH IT SINCE ... $ SHE WON'T LET ME ALONE . $ EVEN IF I GO UPSTAIRS TO WORK , SHE BRINGS ME SIX CUPS OF CO FFEE IN TWO HOURS . $ I HATE BLOODY COFFEE , I HATE JAFFA CAKES . $ I 'M SEVENTEEN - SHE 'S ALWAYS LYING IN WAIT WITH HER TWEEZE RS READY TO POUNCE IF SHE SEES ANY SIGN OF A PIMPLE . $ IT 'S NOT FUNNY . $ < ( TEARFUL . ) > $ I HATE IT . $ CAN'T YOU DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT , DAD ? 02 < ( PANIC ) > $ CRYING , I CAN'T COPE WITH IT ... $ NOT IN BOYS ... $ SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU , SON ... $ 'S A DOCTOR YOU WANT . $ DON'T START CRYING ON ME ... I 'LL GET YOU A GLASS OF WATER ... $ SHALL I GET YOUR MOTHER ? $ I 'D BETTER GET YOUR MOTHER . $ 04 DON'T GET ANYBODY ... I 'M ALL RIGHT . $ 02 YOU WANT TO LEARN A BIT OF SELF-CONTROL , BOY . $ WE ALL HAVE FEELINGS BUT WE DON'T MAKE A MEAL OF 'EM ... $ MAKES MY BLOOD RUN COLD , BAWLING AT SEVENTEEN ... $ I 'M GOING TO TAKE YOUR MOTHER HER MILKY DRINK . $ DO YOU WANT ONE ? $ < ( NICK SHAKES HIS HEAD . $ HE SITS AND PICKS MOODILY AT THE FRINGE ON THE BROCADE SOFA . $ DOOR SLAMS , AND JIM MEETS LYNN AND MIKE COMING IN . $ THEIR MOOD OF REPLETENESS AND MILD HILARITY SWAMPS THE PREVA ILING DEPRESSION . ) > $ 03 OO , I FEEL HEAPS BETTER . $ WE HAD A LOVELY MEAL , SCAMPI AND STEAK DIANE , THOUGH IT 'S REPEATING ON ME SHOCKING . $ NERVOUS FLATULENCE MIKE SAYS IT IS . $ WHERE 'S MUM ? $ 02 SHE 'S A BIT OVERWROUGHT ... $ IT 'S BEEN A GRUELLING EVENING FOR HER . $ 06 I KNEW HE 'D TURN NASTY ON YOU , THE FILTHY LITTLE CREEP . $ ME KNUCKLES ARE STILL ITCHING TO FETCH HIM ONE THE SIDE OF T HE FACE . $ 02 OO NO , MIKE , SOME NEW THINGS 'VE COME TO LIGHT ... $ 03 LET MIKE MANHANDLE HIM , THAT 'LL CURE HIM . $ TIME MIKE 'S DONE WITH HIM HE 'LL HAVE A VOICE TWO OCTAVES H IGHER . $ WE MET A BLOKE ON THE BOAT , SMASHING FELLER , EX-COPPER , W E TOLD HIM THE WHOLE STORY - $ 02 < ( INTERRUPTS ; ALARMED ) > $ OO , LYNN , MIND WHAT YOU SAY TO OUTSIDERS . $ 06 I TOLD HIM , NOT THE GORY DETAILS , I SAID THERE 'S THIS PANSY SCHOOLTEACHER THAT 'S BIN SNIFFING ROUND MY FIANCEE'S BROTHER WHO 'S ONLY A SCHOOLKID . $ < ( SILENCE . ) > $ 04 YOU MEDIEVAL CRETIN . $ 03 HE SAID BLOKES LIKE THAT NEED A BIT OF ACERSION THERAPY , STICK A COUPLE OF WIRES WHERE IT HURTS , FEW HUNDRED VOLTS UP THEIR BACK PASSAGE , THAT 'D CURE 'EM . $ < ( SILENCE . ) > $ ONLY IT STRUCK ME AS FUNNY . $ < ( SILENCE , ) > $ < ( WEAKLY ) > $ THE WAY HE SAID IT ... SHOWED A SENSE OF HUMOUR I THOUGHT , HER , HER ... $ BIT CRUDE , OF COURSE . $ 04 < ( LOOKS AT HER WITH CONTEMPT ) > $ YOU DIRTY-MINDED SOW . $ 03 < ( TURNS ON HIM , VEHEMENT , TO COVER HER SOLECISM ) > $ HOW DARE YOU TURN ON ME , IT 'S ALL THROUGH YOU WE 'RE HAVIN G TO SUFFER . $ YOU 'VE KILLED OFF MY BUSINESS AT ONE STROKE , AND THEN YOU HAVE THE GALL TO SPIT YOUR SPITE ON ME , AFTER WE 'VE BEEN S TANDING UP FOR YOU . $ 04 OW GO AND GIVE YOUR PUBIC HAIR A PERM . $ 02 I OUGHT TO MAKE YOU BOTH WASH YOUR MOUTHS OUT WITH CARBOL IC . $ 06 THIS BLOKE WE MET 'S GOT AN AGENCY . $ HE LEFT THE FORCE CAUSE HE 'D BUILT UP A CAST-IRON CASE AGAI NST THIS THUG . $ WHAT HAPPENS ? $ CONDITIONAL DISCHARGE , TWO YEARS' WORK GONE PHUT . $ ANYWAY , HE 'S OPERATING ON HIS OWN . $ PRIVATE INVESTIGATION BUSINESS . $ 03 YEH , HE FERRETS OUT THE MURKY DETAILS IN THESE BIG DIVOR CE CASES . $ MARVELLOUS BLOKE , BRAINY AIN'T THE WORD . $ FORTNIGHT SHADDERING HIM , HE RECKONS HE 'D DIG OUT ENOUGH I NFO TO GET HIM LIFE . $ 04 LAY OFF HIM . $ I 'VE FINISHED WITH HIM , I 'VE FINISHED WITH SCHOOL AND I H OPE TO CHRIST I 'LL SOON BE FINISHED WITH YOU . $ I 'M JUST GOING TO STAY AROUND TILL YOUR WEDDING SO 'S I CAN TIE AN OLD BOOT TO YOUR CAR , AND GUESS WHO IT 'LL BE ... $ I 'LL STAND IN THE AISLE AND SHOUT ' HERE COMES THE SLAG ' . .. $ #84 $ 03 UGH . $ YOU TRY ANYTHING FUNNY IN AN HOUSE OF GOD AND MIKE 'LL GIVE YOU A CAULIFLOWER EAR AND A HARE LIP ... $ THE THOUGHT THAT WE 'VE GOT THE SAME BLOOD IN OUR VEINS MAKE S ME WANT TO GO AND GET A TRANSFUSION . $ 06 YOU STAND FOR EVERYTHING THAT 'S ROTTEN AND CORRUPT IN OU R SOCIETY . $ 04 TROUBLE WITH YOU , YOU 'RE A BAD CASE OF COITUS INTERRUPT US . $ 03 < ( ANGER ) > $ O GO AND BE LARRY'S BUM BOY , THAT 'S ALL YOUR FIT FOR ANYWA Y . $ < ( NICK HITS LYNN ON THE FACE . $ MIKE SEIZES HIM AND THROWS HIM SPRAWLING OVER THE BROCADE SO FA . ) > $ 06 I 'LL BATTER YOU TO BLEEDING PULP . $ < ( LYNN SOBS GUSTILY . ) > $ YOU WEEDY LITTLE MARY ANN . $ 02 < ( ANXIETY ) > $ STOP IT , YOU 'LL WAKE EV . $ 04 YOU 'RE LIKE A PAIR OF JACKALS , BAYING FOR BLOOD ALL THE WHILE . $ NOBODY LISTENS IN THIS HOUSE . $ YOU DON'T EVEN WAIT TO FIND OUT WHAT 'S HAPPENED ... $ TELL 'EM , DAD . $ THE REASON WHY MUM 'S UPSET IS 'COS I 'VE SAID I 'M NEVER GO ING ROUND THERE AGAIN . $ SHE 'S BEEN CONVERTED BY LARRY . $ SHE 'S FALLEN FOR HIM . $ 03 THAT 'S RIGHT , NOW DRAG MUM THROUGH THE DIRT . $ SHE 'S IDOLISED YOU , SHE THINKS YOUR PISS IS VINTAGE CHAMPA GNE . $ 04 SHE WANTS ME TO GO ROUND THERE THREE TIMES A WEEK . $ FOR COACHING . $ 03 HER PRECIOUS NICK , THROW HIM INTO THE ARMS OF A PERVERT 06 < ( TO JIM ) > $ WHAT 'S GOING ON THEN ? $ WHAT 'VE YOU COOKED UP ROUND THERE ? $ 02 IT 'S NOT AS CUT AND DRIED AS YOU SEEM TO THINK , MIKE . $ 04 I 'VE TOLD YOU . $ SHE COMES BACK AND SHE 'S FALLEN IN LOVE WITH LARRY . $ SHE SAYS I 'VE GOT TO GO ROUND THERE THREE NIGHTS A WEEK . $ 03 MIKE , WE SHOULD 'VE GONE . $ I FELT GUILTY WALKING OUT ON IT IN THE FIRST PLACE . $ 06 HE WOULDN'T HAVE TALKED ME ROUND . $ 03 NO , MIKE , I 'LL TELL YOU WHAT I THINK IT IS , BETWEEN Y OU AND ME . $ SHE 'S ON THE CHANGE YOU KNOW ... $ THE CHANGE ... $ < ( AUTHORITATIVE . ) > $ THEY GET VERY UNSTABLE ON THE CHANGE . $ JACKIE'S MOTHER HAD A PHANTOM PREGNANCY , AT FIFTY-ONE IF YO U PLEASE . $ 02 YOU MUST REALISE ... I CAN SEE HER POINT ... $ SHE 'S LIVED THROUGH THAT BOY THE PAST EIGHTEEN YEARS ... $ 03 YES , IT 'S A PITY SHE NEVER NOTICED SHE 'D GOT TWO CHILD REN . $ 02 IF SHE 'S TOOK HIS PART , I 'VE ALWAYS TOOK YOURS . $ 03 THANKS FOR NOTHING ... $ OF COURSE , I WAS ONLY A MERE GIRL . $ BIGGEST WONDER OUT THEY DIDN'T BIND ME FEET ... $ STAR APPEARED OVER BROMLEY COMMON WHEN HE WAS BORN YOU KNOW . $ 04 YOU 'RE JUST JEALOUS 'COS YOU 'RE OLD AND UGLY . $ 03 MIKE , I DON'T CARE WHERE WE LIVE , ONLY LET 'S GET AWAY SOON ... $ LET 'S BRING THE DATE FORWARD , DAMN THE THREE-TIER HORSESHO E . $ I DON'T MIND IF WE HAVE TO LIVE IN THOSE TWO POKY ROOMS ABOV E THE SALON . $ I MUST GET AWAY FROM HIM , OR I SWEAR I 'LL CHOKE THE LIFE O UT OF HIM , LIKE I NEARLY DID WHEN HE WAS IN HIS PRAM . $ 06 MR PARGETER , JIM , IS THIS RIGHT WHAT HE SAYS ? $ 02 WELL ... $ WE DID SEE HIS POINT OF VIEW . $ 06 POINT OF VIEW , PERVERTS DON'T HAVE POINTS OF VIEW . $ 02 IT 'S NOT LIKE THAT , MIKE . $ EV SAID WE 'D MISUNDERSTOOD HIM . $ QUITE FRANKLY , LYNN , THE WAY YOU TOOK WHAT MRS OOSIT SAID AS GOSPEL AGAINST YOUR BROTHER , AND A HIGHLY EDUCATED SCHOO LTEACHER SPEAKS VOLUMES FOR YOUR IDEA OF FAMILY LOYALTY ... $ 03 IF THAT 'S FAMILY LET 'S ALL GO BACK TO THE TREES . $ 02 EV SAID ENVY AND MALICE HAD BEEN TALKING ... $ 'CAUSE THAT MR CALDECOTT REALLY IS OUT OF HIS CLASS IN A PLA CE LIKE CLISSOLD STREET . $ < ( ENTER EVELYN IN NIGHT-TURBAN AND ROSY HOUSECOAT . ) > $ 01 I COULD HEAR VOICES RAISED IN ANGER , VOICES THAT SHOULD SPEAK NOTHING BUT AFFECTION TO ONE ANOTHER . $ GOODNESS KNOWS , THE FAMILY 'S UNDER ATTACK FROM ALL QUARTER S THESE DAYS ... $ IF WE CAN'T AVOID DISSENSION AND STRIFE AMONG OURSELVES , WE PLAY STRAIGHT INTO THE HANDS OF OUR ENEMIES ... $ THE WHOLE BASIS OF OUR CIVILISED WAY OF LIFE IS THE FAMILY , AND ONCE THAT 'S BEEN THROWN OUT OF THE WINDOW , THE FLOOD- GATES ARE OPEN . $ < ( NICK AND LYNN BOTH START AS IF TO SPEAK , BUT SHE SILENC ES THEM WITH HER TRAFFIC POLICEMAN GESTURE . ) > $ BE SILENT , THIS ISN'T THE TOWER OF BABEL ... $ YOUR FATHER AND I HAVE BEEN TO SEE MR CALDECOTT AND I CAN SA Y WITHOUT A SHADOW OF DOUBT THAT HE IS AS INCAPABLE OF ANY L OW MOTIVE AS I AM ... $ HE IS A MAN OF REFINEMENT AND HONOUR , AS DEDICATED TO EDUCA TION AS MONKS WERE TO THEIR RELIGION IN BYGONE TIMES ... $ I AM NOT SURE THAT SOME OF THE STORIES , SO GLIBLY REPEATED UNDER THIS VERY ROOF , LYNN , ARE NOT ACTIONABLE , IF HE CHO SE TO TURN NASTY ... $ HE SPARED US NO DETAIL OF HIS PRIVATE LIFE , AND I CAN TELL YOU IT 'S BEYOND REPROACH ... $ LIFE HAS DEALT HIM A VERY BITTER BLOW , I CAN'T TELL YOU WHA T IT IS , YOU 'RE ONLY CHILDREN , YOU 'RE NOT MATURE ENOUGH TO UNDERSTAND , BUT THE UPSHOT OF IT IS HE 'S LOST THE PROP AND MAINSTAY OF HIS LIFE ... $ IN FACT , I 'M NOT SURE WHEN LYNN GETS MARRIED THAT WE SHAN' T OFFER HIM THE CHANCE OF A LITTLE FAMILY LIFE HERE ... $ CLISSOLD STREET IS NOT AN ENVIRONMENT FOR A MAN OF HIS CALIB RE ... $ OF COURSE LYNN'S ROOM IS MORE OF A BOURDOIR AT THE MOMENT , NOT A MAN'S ROOM AT ALL ... $ THE FLORAL WALLPAPER WILL HAVE TO GO ... $ A PIPE RACK AND A LEATHER ARMCHAIR I THINK ... $ IF HE LIKES , HE CAN HAVE THE PAINTING OF OLD FAITHFUL , ALT HOUGH I SHOULD BE LOTH TO PART WITH IT ... $ YOU 'LL HAVE THE EQUIVALENT OF A PRIVATE TUTOR , NICK , AND THAT 'S SOMETHING EVEN THE ARISTOCRACY CAN'T AFFORD IN THESE IMPOVERISHED TIMES ... $ IT WON'T BE LIKE LOSING A DAUGHTER AT ALL THEN , I SHALL BE GAINING A SON ... $ YOU 'LL BE LEARNING FROM HIM ALL THE TIME , NICHOLAS , NOT J UST IN DRIBS AND DRABS . $ YOU 'LL TAKE TO CAMBRIDGE LIKE A DUCK TO WATER , PERFECT MAN NERS , HOLD YOUR OWN IN CONVERSATION WITH ANYBODY ... $ MR CALDECOTT 'LL BE MORE OF A ... A MENTOR THAN ANYTHING . $ AND WE SHALL VISIT YOU ... AS A FAMILY . $ WE SHALL BE PROUD OF YOU , AND YOU WILL BE PROUD OF US . $ THE STONES OF THE QUADRANGLE WILL RING WITH OUR FOOTSTEPS , JUST AS THEY HAVE ECHOED WITH THE STEPS OF MANY ILLUSTRIOUS AND SCHOLARLY PEOPLE BEFORE US ... $ NICHOLAS , IT WILL BE UP TO YOU , WE LOOK TO YOU , TO RESTOR E THE FAMILY TO ITS RIGHTFUL PLACE IN SOCIETY ... $ BECAUSE MY GRANDFATHER WASN'T A NOBODY . $ HE OWNED HOUSES . $ AND KEPT FOUR GREYS AND A LANDAU ... $ WE SHALL EQUAL , IF NOT SURPASS HIM . $ AND THEN I SHALL DIE A HAPPY WOMAN ... $ LOOK AT THE TIME , IT 'S HALF PAST TWELVE , LIGHTS BURNING I N FRONT ROOMS AT THIS TIME OF NIGHT MEANS ONLY ONE THING - F AMILIES AT LOGGERHEADS , AND WE 'RE NOT HAVING THAT SAID OF US ... $ GO TO BED , NICHOLAS , JIM JUST SEE TO THAT DOG-MESS ON THE FRONT PAVEMENT WILL YOU , I SHALL ONLY LIE AWAKE WORRYING AB OUT IT IF YOU DON'T ... $ < END > $